A Different Kind of Deal
by Stryder2008
Summary: Dean is injured on a hunt, Sam's at college...and their dad is missing."…the spinal cord was severely damaged and there was nothing that they could do. I have no idea where dad is at…or if he's still alive…and I have no clue how I got to that hospital or what exactly happened that damaged my back." Find the witch & fix the problem! Injured!Dean/ Concerned!Sam Brotherly moments.
1. Chapter 1

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: ** Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: So I know there's interest_**

**Chapter 1: **

_The Missed Call_

Dean rolled his wheelchair around the old motel bed, dropping his head onto his chest in frustration and exhaling his irritation as he noticed that the space between the table and the bed wasn't wide enough for him to roll through. The instant anger that he felt, rushing to the surface, every time he found something _else_ that he couldn't do rising quickly to the surface.

He knew that he had waited as long as he possible could, he had run out of money and his continued anger could only take him so far… and that he had finally been reduced to a place where he had to make the hardest phone call he had ever had to make. He had to call his little brother, the same little brother that had abandoned or ran out…however he wanted to color it on any given day, on him and his father almost 4 years ago.

Sam had walked away from their family…he had left Dean standing in the doorway of the old motel in the middle of nowhere USA watching his little brother's back in anticipation of the turn…as he walked away without ever looking back. The argument between his brother and his father had been vicious on that particular June night and Dean had been unwillingly drawn into it, he had done his best to try and not take sides. His father however, had blamed him once Sam was gone and that had led to more arguments and his father essentially telling him that he was _worthless_. If he had been a better brother, Sam wouldn't have left; he would have stayed, if just for Dean. It hadn't taken long for his father take the verbal blame to the next level…the alcohol helped with that too. Over the last three years Dean had suffered his father's wrath at the loss of the youngest Winchester. He had done everything possible to alleviate his father's disappointment…but it had never been enough. _He had never been enough_…and he had the bruises and broken bones to prove it.

His green eyes flickered back and forth between his duffel bag and the cell phone lying on the flowered bed spread. "Please answer this time Sammy." He said quietly. Dean had tried to call his little brother when the accident had happened…_hah! Accident…he still didn't know exactly what had happened…_ He thought bitterly. But, par for the course, Sam had ignored the first call, and Dean had been just angry and bitter enough to choose not to leave a message, he hadn't talked to his little brother in almost four years as a result. He had been in this damn chair for nearly a year now and at first it had been nearly impossible for him to do _anything_, but he had found ways to cope, for now. He was still hopeful that this was something that there was a supernatural fix for; one he just hadn't found it yet. Dean was pretty sure that this _accident _was the reason that his father had disappeared nearly a year ago. _At least he really hoped that was what his father was working on._ There was a chance that after the 'accident' his father had simply had enough of Dean in general and simply chosen to leave his worthless ass behind…since he couldn't hunt anymore. Hell, Dean couldn't do anything but the research at this point. And he was no longer a viable option for his father's release of stress and anger…in other words…now he was good for absolutely _nothing_. His father had made sure that he was fully aware of that fact and that was before he had been relegated to this damn chair.

Dean grabbed his phone, the decision made…his fingers shaking slightly as he dialed Sam's old number, praying that he hadn't changed the number in the last couple of years. He waited as the phone rang several times before he heard a voice on the other end. "Hello?" A deep male voice answered.

Dean closed his eyes and scrubbed his hand down his face as the sounds of his little brother's voice vibrated through his head, he leaned forward placing his elbows on his useless knees. "Sammy?" he asked quietly. He heard the shocked intake of air as Sam mentally connected the deep gravelly voice on the phone line with that of his older brother.

"Dean?" Sam asked. _God, he hadn't heard from Dean for years and all of the sudden on a Sunday night he was getting a phone call from him? What the hell?_ Oh god, hopefully nothing had happened to their father. "Is dad okay? Are you okay Dean?" he asked quickly. Dean couldn't help but notice that Sam had asked about their father before he had asked about him. It was just one more nail in the proverbial coffin that seemed to represent his life.

Sam's mind ran through so many scenarios that could've caused his brother to reach out to him after so much time that he found a tension headache starting to form behind his eyes. He leaned over and placed his hand at the back of his neck and started to massage the stress and the tight muscles to alleviate the pain.

Dean concentrated on breathing in and out slowly, and then finally answered his brother's questions. "Uh…no Sam…not so much." He said.

"What the hell does that mean Dean? Could you be _more_ cryptic?" Sam said in exasperation, his anger immediately surfacing at the evasion tactics of his other brother.

"Look Sam…can you just meet me…please?" Dean asked quietly.

That wasn't a normal request from his brother, so Sam took a moment to think and Dean rushed forward. "Sam, I haven't asked you for a thing in almost 4 years, please I just…I need you to meet me."

"Okay Dean. Where?" Sam asked as he grabbed a pen off the table and a piece of notebook paper.

"Motel off the 110…San Bernadino…." Dean said, his breath almost held as Sam wrote down the address, he knew that this was weird and he wondered why the hell Dean wasn't coming to him? He had the freaking car, not Sam.

XXXX

Sam asked to borrow Brady's BMW, is was nice to have friends with money and left that night to meet Dean. It had been such an odd request that Sam was worried about his brother and he really needed to see just what the hell had happened to cause Dean to contact him in the first place. Sam pulled into the shabby motel parking lot, it was even worse than the ones he remembered staying in when they were kids…if that was possible. There was only one light on in the entire rundown parking lot; the others were completely burned out. Sam's eyes flashed around looking for the Impala…he was surprised when he didn't see it anywhere in the lot. _Dean, I swear if I drove all the way out here and you aren't here…I'm gonna kick your ass._ He thought with no small amount of irritation. Sam pulled into the space in front of room 115 and climbed out of the car, he looked up at the room and inhaled deeply steeling his nerves for this encounter. He knew that at some point he would have to come clean with his brother and explain why he had left that night…but that wasn't _this _night.

He walked up the door, the white paint peeling off the wood and the numbers a dim shadow of what they had been when they had been painted onto that old door…like a million years ago. He knocked three times and stepped back slightly, leaning against the doorframe and waited for Dean. He heard movement on the other side of the door but it was taking Dean a lot longer than it should have for him to walk over and open the damn door. That thought had Sam standing up worriedly and looking expectantly at the still closed door. He knocked again, harder this time. "Dean?" he called loudly. Suddenly the door was creaked open and Sam's eyes dropped several inches to connect with his older brother's green gaze. It was about three feet south of where it should have been Dean was sitting in a wheelchair.

"Sorry Sam. I'm not as fast as I used to be." He said with a light chuckle…although there was absolutely no humor in his eyes as he looked up at Sam. He rolled out of the way and waved a hand indicating that Sam should come inside.

Sam's eyebrows drew together in confusion as he stared at his brother, expecting him to jump up out of the chair and yell '_gotcha!_' But that never happened; Dean remained seated in the chair, his legs listing to one side and far thinner than Sam could ever remember seeing them; Dean's face was a mask of shame and sadness as he watched the myriad of confused emotions flash through his little brother's expressive blue-green eyes. "Dean…what happened?" Sam asked as he sank down onto the bed nearest the bathroom…_old habits die hard_ he supposed.

Dean looked at the floor, picking at his black pants and then back at Sam, "I'm not really sure Sam." He answered honestly. "Dad and I were hunting this witch in Montana, dad got taken by the damn thing…next thing I know, I'm out cold and waking up in a hospital in freakin Utah…dad was nowhere to be found." He shrugged his shoulders and then looked back at Sam, his eyes blank. His whole expression was the mask that Sam remembered seeing far too often when they were kids.

"You don't know how you got to the hospital? Or where dad is at…or even if he is still alive?" Sam said incredulously. "So what did the doctors say about your condition?"

"One question at a time Sammy…they said that the spinal cord was severely damaged and that there was nothing that they could do. I have no idea where dad is at…or if he's still alive…and I have no clue how I got to that hospital or what exactly happened that damaged my back." Dean spilled out the facts without allowing them to really settle on himself, if he did he knew that Sam would see it…his little brother was way too good at looking past Dean's defenses. Sam looked at him with horror reflecting out his '_wounded puppy-dog face'_. Dean _really _hadn't missed that face…he hated it when Sam pulled that one out of the _bag of tricks_ that he had stored away for both _defense and offense_ where his older brother was concerned.

"So dad just up and left you?" Sam asked quietly, his fingers twisting in his own pants as he looked at the condition his brother was in, _how could their father have just abandoned Dean like that_?

Dean shrugged again and rolled back further from his younger brother in an attempt to put some distance between how he was feeling about being abandoned by their father and how he was all too aware that he was just a liability now anyways. It's not like he could help his father hunt…he was now as worthless to his dad…as he'd been telling Dean he was since Sam had left for school.

His younger brother was the smart one…he was the one that had loved school, was good at research, and could stand up their father for what he wanted. Dean had never been able to do that…oh he could research just fine…but he wasn't as fast or as good at it as Sam. He hadn't loved anything about school, except that he could hook-up with some new chick in every town…and he had. _And as for Dad?_ Well, Dean had never had the _balls_ to stand up to their father over anything…unless one counted the numerous occasions that he had argued in favor of Sam going to college. That one decision had hurt Dean, deeply…but he'd known then that this life wasn't for Sam. His little brother could be something more than just a hunter…he could have a life beyond the blood and the dirt and the constant fear. And Dean had never wanted anything more than he wanted this 'escape' for Sam…and _that particular_ argument with his father had ended in a broken rib and a seriously painful black eye. Sam never knew about any it _of course_…because Dean would never tell him, the abuse that his father had doled out over the years would go to his grave with the young hunter.

Sam sank onto the bed, scrubbing his hand down his face and shaking his head in silent denial…although the solid evidence was sitting in a wheelchair watching him with guarded green eyes and clenched fists. Sam had always known that there was a chance that he could lose his brother to a hunt…it was one of the facts that had forced him to leave. Sam couldn't deal with the idea of Dean getting hurt…or worse… _But this?_ He'd never considered that his brother would be relegated to a wheelchair because of a hunt…and seeing the evidence as he glanced over at Dean was just about heartbreaking. He exhaled loudly and leaned forward; placing his elbows on his knees…a mirror image to Dean's assumed position several hours earlier.

"Who else knows about this Dean?" Sam asked as he gestured to Dean's chair.

Dean shrugged his shoulders and leaned back in the chair, his legs unnaturally still. "No one." He said quietly.

"Why not?" Sam wanted to know immediately. There were any number of people that Dean could have called. Bobby, Pastor Jim, or even Caleb…_so why hadn't he?_

Dean looked down and picked at his sweatpants, his face washed clean of emotions…but his eyes showing his shame like a beacon in the dark to his younger brother. "I didn't want them to know…because that would mean that it was…" he dropped off and became quiet.

"Why did you wait so long to call me, Dean?" Sam pressed. His patented 'bitch-face' making an unscheduled appearance as he stared at Dean, waiting for an answer from his generally cryptic brother.

Dean huffed and looked away before answering. "Once I told you, it would be…real." His voice broke on the word 'real' and he slumped forward in his chair. Sam looked…really looked at his brother, Dean's blonde hair was longer than he had ever seen it, his face unshaven, and he was wearing _sweatpants, for god's sakes…_

Sam tilted his head in sympathy. Dean was the strongest person that he'd ever known and seeing those shoulders slump in defeat or embarrassment wasn't something that Sam was used to…and he found that he hated it. "Is there any chance that this is supernatural?" he asked.

Dean's green eyes met his blue-green gaze slowly and he shrugged his shoulders. "I'm not really sure Sam, but I don't think so…don't get me wrong I wish it was. But the doctors showed me the x-rays and the damage to the L-3 and L-4 vertebrae…they were smashed together pinching the spinal cord and causing…" he spread his hands wide, gesturing to the '_giant wheeled elephant_' in the room.

Sam bit his lip as his eyes scanned his brother's face for any chance that he was hiding something…anything…he was even more distressed when he saw open honesty in Dean's emerald eyes.

"So what now Dean?" he asked softly.

Dean shook his head and inhaled as his eyes flickered around the dingy motel room. He knew that there was no way that Sam was going to leave him in this room. "I think we need to find dad, Sam. He's the only one that might have any answers."

That was what Sam was afraid Dean would say… He still had school, he couldn't just walk away from that, but he couldn't walk away from Dean either…not in this condition. His brother had given up most of his childhood raising Sam and there was no way that the one time that Dean actually 'asked' for help from him that Sam would deny him. He continued to chew his lower lip and twist a piece of his hair as he considered his options. Dean watched the childhood action and a small smile inched onto his own lips…Sam used to do that when he was weighing what he considered 'very big decisions'. _Some things don't change…_he glanced down…_and some things do._ He thought bitterly.

Sam inhaled deeply and blew the air out, watching as his bangs shifted and then turning to Dean. "First things first…where's the Impala?"

Dean's eyes sparkled at the thought of his car… "She's parked in a garage on third street, there were some modifications needed so I could drive her…but…" he gestured to his useless legs again. "Obviously I couldn't do the work…so…" Sam couldn't remember a single time in his life that his brother had admitted to not being able to do anything with that car. Dean was a mechanical wizard…he had a natural affinity for all things motorized.

Sam's eyes dropped from Dean's; no longer able to hold the gaze…he was breaking inside for his brother. The acceptance that he saw in Dean's behavior was so unlike his cocky older brother that Sam wondered exactly what else had happened while he was away. "Dean…why didn't you try to call me?" he asked softly.

Dean's head snapped up and met his eyes full force… "I did." He answered simply.

Sam shook his head…and then something tickled at his memory...sometimes having a _great_ memory wasn't a good thing…about a year ago he had gotten a weird call. The caller ID hadn't recognized the number, so he hadn't answered it…but he had checked on the area code. "What state did all this happen in, Dean?"

Dean used his arms to shift his weight and inhaled as he saw Sam's hamster going into overdrive as his brother pieced everything together. "Utah…" he said slowly.

"801…area code right?" Sam finished. He watched with rising horror as his brother nodded and confirmed his suspicions. Dean had tried to call him, to tell him about the accident and probably to ask for his help…and Sam had ignored the call. _He had walked on his brother and then he had ignored his damned phone call…what kind of brother was he? _ Sam was kicking himself mentally and Dean recognized a full-blown emo fest coming on.

"Sam…you didn't know. I should have tried to call again…but I was angry and bitter…and scared." He whispered. He didn't want Sam feeling guilty for something that he didn't even know was happening. Dean tried to change tactics… "Should we call Bobby? Think he'd have a clue where dad is?"

Sam recognized what Dean was doing and decided that he wasn't going to call his brother out on it, since he really wanted to change the subject too. Maybe if they got a hold of Bobby, they could get to tracking down their father…and maybe…just maybe there was a solution to Dean's current condition.

TBC…

**Author's Note: **_I always tend to write hurt Dean…so here's another one. But I don't like to leave him in nasty positions forever…so there will be a hunt and an eventual solution to his legs. But the brothers need to find their father, the witch, and hopefully work through their anger at one another along the way. There will be some hunts from the first season…only a little modified for Dean's sake. _

**Please Review: I would like to know if there is interest in this little story…**


	2. A HuntGood Idea or Bad Idea

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They help me write..._**

**Chapter 2**

_A Hunt...Good Idea or Bad Idea_

Dean watched his brother wave goodbye to his friend as the tall blonde kid named…_what was it?...oh yeah Brady._ Drove away in _his _car with some girl in the other car they had driven over in. In another lifetime he would've been hitting on the cute brunette as soon as they had pulled up…but these days…he just didn't want to make the effort. Hell, he'd _never_ been shot down and he didn't exactly want to break that streak now…besides…_who would wanna be hit on by a guy in a wheelchair?_ It wasn't that Dean didn't think that he could probably still sweet talk the ladies…but he just wouldn't want to drag them into something with him…he wasn't even sure if he could _seal the deal… _He felt kinda bad that Sam's friends had had to drive all the way out here, but there wasn't he could do about his brother's chosen mode of transportation.

Dean's green eyes shifted and softened as he fondly stared at the sleek black Chevy now parked in front of their motel, the pale gold and yellows of the setting sun glinting off her shiny exterior. Sam had made several calls throughout the day, starting with his friends, then placing a call to the school, and finally talking to his boss at some part time job he apparently had at the campus bookstore. His brother had explained that there had been a family emergency and that he needed to take the remainder of the semester off…kinda like a leave absence. Then his little brother had walked the mile and a half to the shop where the Impala had been and picked her up, driving back to the motel…to an extremely relieved older brother.

Dean rolled over to the car and lovingly ran his fingers along the highly polished fender, his eyes closing in pleasure at the smooth feel of the paint. And then he remembered that if the car needed to be washed or polished or even tuned up…he wasn't going to be able to do it…not without help. His good mood dissipated quickly as the realization struck home causing him to glance back over to Sam's overly observant gaze. Dean's eyes were drawn down to the totally useless legs attached to his hips, the feeling in them stopping just below his pelvic bone, while the numbness extended all the way to his toes. He sighed and sank further into the leather back of his wheelchair, his fingers dropping to absently pick at his pants…a habit that he seemed to have picked up when he realized that he couldn't feel anything…_interesting that it mirrored Sam's habit._ He wondered somtimes if it was just to reassure himself that his legs were indeed still there. His gaze flickered back up as Sam walked back toward him, his expression distant…and something else that Dean didn't recognize. He figured there were probably a lot of things that he was going to have to _relearn_ about Sam.

He turned away from the car and rolled himself back toward the motel, he was surprised to feel someone step up and start pushing him, Dean slammed his palms into the wheels and stopped their forward motion. "I got it Sam…I've been pushing myself for a year now." He said his voice edged with irritation and resignation. Sam hadn't been around when he could have used a little 'push' in more ways than one. So he really didn't need to worry about trying to help out now, Dean was just catching their combined reflection in the window of the motel as Sam stepped away with a soft 'Sorry.' _Great, now I feel like an asshat..._ He thought in exasperation. It wasn't that he didn't want Sam there, obviously…because Dean had called him, but he didn't want Sam to take away what little autonomy he still had.

"Sorry Sammy…" he said quietly. Dean was careful to remove the anger and frustration from his voice, his didn't want to hurt Sam, but he still hadn't really accepted this whole 'thing'…so the anger was close to the surface. It also didn't help that he secretly wondered if the only reason that Sam had come at all is because he'd told his little brother that their father was missing…and that Sam was only staying because he felt sorry for Dean.

Sam saw the shift in his brother's face…Dean had been pleased to get his _baby_ back…but that turned out to simply be another reminder of what he'd lost in the last year. His brother seemed to have lost much of his drive…_hell he hadn't even looked for their father_ as far as Sam knew….and that really wasn't like his 'obedient' soldier of an older brother. "It's okay Dean…I get it." He replied simply, grabbing the handle of the door and twisting it open. Dean's hand flew up and he grabbed Sam's elbow pulling him around to face his older brother's questioning green eyes.

"What 'exactly' do you get?" he asked as he stared intently at Sam.

Sam shifted uncomfortably and inhaled slowly reaching up to pinch the bridge of his nose in an attempt to alleviate some of the tension that was so thick he could've cut it with a dull butter knife. "Nothing Dean…just forget I said anything." He pulled his elbow from Dean's grasp and walked into the room without another backwards glance.

Dean watched with frustration as Sam fall back into the same secretive habits he'd had as a teenager…the kid had consistently pushed Dean away as he got older. That might've been the second hardest thing that Dean had ever had to deal with…the first being that night Sam left him with their father. He felt a flutter of something uncomfortable in his stomach at the thought of their dad…so he pushed that thought away and rolled into the room, pushing the door shut behind him. Sam was sitting on his bed flipping through the limited TV channels in this cheap ass motel, his face blank of any expression.

Dean took the opportunity to look at his 'not-so-little' brother…Sam had gained even more height, _if that was possible_, he had also gained weight. It looked like his brother had maintained some sort of training regime while he'd been at school. He looked every bit the hunter that their dad had trained him to be. Dean glanced away and caught his own reflection in the bathroom mirror…_at least one of use fulfilled dad's expectations…_the thought bounced through his head so fast that he wasn't able to hide the pain of the random thought. As he looked back up he was horrified to see Sam staring at him, his face twisted in concern and a peculiar look that Sam always got when he was 'figuring' something out. Dean quickly rolled away so that he wasn't looking in that direction anymore, grabbing the phone book off the table and flipping to the pizza delivery places.

"Pizza okay for dinner?" he asked, without looking at his brother.

Sam rolled his eyes as he saw Dean's walls slam back into place. He'd thought that he saw something akin to disappointment slice across Dean's pale face before the '_great wall of Dean_' went back up…but he couldn't be certain. He exhaled loudly at the thought of being back to eating crappy fast food; he missed his organic salads with chicken and balsamic dressing. "Yeah, that's fine Dean." He said without any enthusiasm.

"Well don't bust a gut there Sam." Dean snarked as he flipped through the book until he landed on something that looked like it would work. He looked for his phone, realizing that it wasn't in his pocket on the side of his chair.

Sam saw it on the nightstand and wondered if he should go get it for Dean or if his brother would just be pissed that he'd had the nerve to try and _help…God forbid._ He decided to risk his brother's wrath and walked over to the stand, picking up the small silver flip phone; he turned toward his brother's searching eyes and held up the phone.

Dean's eyebrows came together in irritation and his head tilted to the side as he held his hand out silently. Sam rolled his eyes and tossed Dean's phone at him, Dean realized a fraction of a second too late that he wasn't going to be able to catch the little flying object. He leaned out to the side, reaching too far off to the right, his balance shifting forward and causing his body to slide from its neutral position in the chair. "Shit!" he cried as he felt his legs slip and then the rest of his body follow as he fell to the floor in a pile of tangled limbs and embarrassment.

Sam watched the whole thing like it was in slow motion, his brother's over correction of his lost balance and then the awful sight as Dean realized his mistake and his face flooded with humiliation as he was unable to stop his less than graceful descent to the floor. "Oh God Dean…I'm so sorry." Sam cried as he ran forward trying to prevent Dean's complete and utter collapse onto their motel's questionably clean carpet.

Dean batted at his hands angrily and shook his head as he bit his lower lip, closing his pain-filled eyes for moment. He needed to get control of his raging emotions. He was embarrassed…more than anything else. "I don't need any help Sam! It's not the first time I've fallen and there hasn't been anyone there to pick me up…I'm fucking fine." He bit out the response through clenched teeth as he twisted his upper body and grabbed his chair, using his strong arms to pull himself back into the chair, situating his legs so his feet were on the silver platforms at the base of the chair.

Sam's face was screwed up into the '_wounded puppy look_' again, only this time he looked like he wanted to cry. Dean's words had cut…and they had cut deep. He dropped his blue-green eyes as Dean looked up at him, "I'm sorry Dean." He whispered and walked back to sit quietly on his bed, picking up the remote again and ignoring his older brother's suddenly apologetic face.

Dean scrubbed a hand across his face and back through his blonde hair in frustration…this wasn't going how he'd pictured it. He was doing everything wrong and he was hurting his little brother in the process, he'd meant what he'd said earlier…_Sam hadn't known_ he was hurt and Dean was pretty sure that Sam would have come if he had. At least Dean hoped that Sam would've come for him if he'd known. But there was always a chance that Sam would've been more concerned about school or their father than he would have been about Dean. Their relationship was a fraction of what it had been when they were young…Dean was no longer the hero and Sam definitely wasn't the star-struck little brother anymore. Especially now…Dean wasn't even sure that he could live up the role of a big brother and hero…not in this condition.

Their food arrived twenty seven minutes later…Dean knew this because he had watched the clock to see how long it would take Sam to start talking to him again…his stoic little brother still hadn't said a word. Now they were seated at the table, Sam in a normal chair and Dean in his wheel chair. Dean decided that he'd had enough of the silent treatment. "Should we call Bobby?" he asked as he popped a piece of pizza into his mouth chasing it with a beer.

Sam's eyes shifted to Dean and he shrugged his shoulders, "Probably." He said simply.

Dean furrowed his eyebrows at the short answer and shook his head as he reached for his phone. He flipped it open and found the number for one Bobby Singer…and hit send. He didn't have to wait for long, after two rings there was a gruff voice answering on the other end of the line.

"Hello?" Bobby's voice was rough with age and whiskey…he sounded exactly how Dean remembered from his childhood. He and Sam had spent many a summer running around the salvage yard while their father had been off hunting…Dean didn't want to think about the fact that he may never run again…

"Uh…hey Bobby. This is Dean…Dean Winchester." He managed around the lump that formed in his throat at the happier memories. Sam watched him with somber eyes and picked absently at his own pizza.

"Seriously! You damn idgit! You think I don't know who you are by your name alone?" Bobby groused.

Dean smiled and looked down at the floor. "Yeah…I guess I don't need an introduction do I?" he said.

Bobby huffed into the receiver, "Not even a little bit boy. How're you doing?"

Dean rolled his eyes up and they connected momentarily with his brother's gaze. He shifted the phone to his other hand and rolled in a slight circle so he was pointed at the tv. "Honestly…I've been better." He said slowly.

"What's that supposed to mean Dean? You okay? Your brother okay? Where's your father?" Bobby's voice was picking up both strength and pitch as he rambled through the questions.

Dean inhaled and then scratched his head before he continued. "Sam's good. He's here with me now. I don't know where dad is…" he let the other question hang.

Bobby wasn't a fool; he heard the avoided question like a bullhorn. "You okay son?" he asked, his voice softening slightly.

"Can we come and see you Bobby?"

"You're always welcome here Dean, you know that. That loaded shotgun was for your daddy…not you boys." Bobby's falling out with John Winchester had nothing to do with the boys directly…it was more indirectly. Bobby had seen the bruises on Dean and he knew damn well that they hadn't come from any hunt…John was taking his anger out on his eldest son. And that had pissed Bobby off to no end, so he had warned John to either cut the shit out or get the hell out of his house and off his property. Apparently it had been more important to beat his son than to maintain his friendship with a fellow hunter. It had nearly broken Bobby's heart to watch John drive away with Dean in the passenger seat, knowing that the kid was gonna catch hell for Bobby's outburst…he hadn't heard from any of the Winchester's since that day.

"Dean. Are. You. Okay?" Bobby said slowly, enunciating each word for emphasis.

Dean exhaled loudly and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees again as he tried to ignore the burn behind his eyes at the concern he heard in the old man's voice. Bobby was one of the few people in Dean's life that hadn't ever made him feel like a loser or a complete waste of space. "No…Bobby. Not so much." He whispered into the phone. He heard Sam's grunt behind him and he determinedly didn't look in his brother's direction, he didn't want to see the 'bitch-face' that Sam was most likely wearing at that exact moment.

"Whatever _that_ means Dean…you get yourself and that ginormous brother of yours over to my place and we'll see about fixing you two up." Bobby's offer was not unexpected…but it was still nice to know that they were welcome somewhere. _That he and Sam had a place that was as close to 'home' as they were ever likely to get. _

"We'll be there in a few days Bobby." Dean said.

"Good. Now take care of yourself Dean. And take care of Sam." Bobby said before they disconnected the call.

Dean just sat hunched over his legs as he tried to quell the sting in his eyes and the burning emotions that curled in his gut.

"So…we going to Bobby's?" Sam asked as he stood up and broke the silence heading to his bed where he flopped down and thrust his arms behind his head.

Dean glanced up and nodded as he rolled backwards toward the bathroom, "Yeah. We should get some sleep and leave first thing in the morning…okay?" Dean added before he pushed the door shut behind himself. Sam's eye's widened as he realized that they weren't leaving until the following morning, _great at least this way we can sleep in real beds._ The thought raced through his mind and he wondered how long they could really drive before they would need to stop. Dean's back wasn't exactly 100 percent, hell it wasn't even 50 percent. So it was logical to assume that Sam would be doing the majority of the driving, although he knew that this was going to start a fight with Dean…but damn-it he needed to be able to help his brother. Sam had never felt as guilty about anything as he did about not answering that damn call a year ago…he had to try and make up for that somehow.

Sam heard the water in the bathroom flip on, he rolled his eyes and pulled out his laptop scrolling through local news stories…he happened upon one about an old Asylum…one where the people went into sane and then went bat-shit crazy when they left. He read the story and was just finishing the article when his brother came rolling out of the steam filled bathroom, _I hope he left me some hot water, the jerk._

"You finished in there?" Sam asked as Dean pulled a Q-tip out of his ear and nodded.

"Yeah…I'm good. Your turn bitch." Dean said with his usual smartass attitude.

Sam's eyes narrowed at his brother's snarky remark. "Leave any hot water for me jerk?" he shot back with every bit as much attitude as Dean.

"Some…better hurry though." Dean's green eyes tracked his brother as he shifted on the bed and stretched, yawning hugely. Sam rolled his eyes at Dean's pointed stare and stood up grabbing his duffel bag then heading into the bathroom to use up the remainder of the hot water.

Dean's eyes were drawn to Sam's laptop…he'd finished the article and was researching possible causes when Sam walked tiredly out of the bathroom, he was still toweling off his longer than necessary hair as Dean started to speak. "So this Asylum…"

Sam's head tilted and he looked intently at Dean… "What about it?"

Dean smiled, "It's on the way to Bobby's…"

Sam shrugged his tired shoulders, "So."

Dean rolled his eyes and then rolled away from the bed so that he was directly in front of Sam and looked up at him intently. "So…we should check it out."

Sam's face would have been comical if Dean hadn't been offended by the '_Why…you can't hunt_.' look in his brother's eyes. "Dean…I'm not sure that's such a good idea man."

Dean squared his shoulders and schooled his featured defiantly. "I can still help Sam." He ground out, trying to rein in his temper at Sam's total lack of faith in his abilities…limited though they were. He wasn't without skills that could still be useful on a hunt…he was still a really good shot with whatever weapon was needed. True he couldn't run or anything, but he could research and talk to witnesses…

Sam saw the shift in Dean's face and he felt his chest tighten at the determined look he saw in Dean's intense green eyes…Sam wasn't winning this fight, not matter how good his arguments were. Dean had already decided that they were going to check this out…who knows…maybe it'd be good for his older brother and then they could move on to Bobby's and see about finding their father…and maybe….just maybe….fixing Dean's legs in the process.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _There will be some alterations to the hunt that takes place in the Asylum so that Dean can participate…but all the angst of that episode will totally make it into the next chapter…as will Bobby._

**Please Review: Let me know if you like the direction this is headed in…**


	3. Rock Salt and Forced Honesty

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster..._**

**Chapter 3**

_Rock Salt and Forced Honesty_

Dean didn't know what he'd expected but this wasn't it…he was rolling down a long hallway toward where he been told, by those two kids, that his brother had gone…apparently _because he'd called him_. Only _he_ hadn't…Dean hadn't called Sam and now who knows what had gotten to his younger brother. He inhaled sharply as he rolled through a large set of heavy doors, his wheel chair catching on the hinge and bringing him to a halt as he tried to untangle himself. "God damn-it!" He swore as he jerked the wheel, it finally rolled away from whatever had jammed it up and he pushed the door open to finish getting through it. He was currently missing the automatic doors that most places had nowadays. "SAM!" he called as he rolled over garbage and decades of dirt and crap, his nose wrinkled against the smell. "Sammy!" he tried again. He heard something move behind him and he spun around only to come face to face with Sam. "Sam!"

"Jesus Sam…answer me next time I'm calling you man..." He said as he quickly ran his eyes over his brother, looking for injury. "You know that wasn't me that called your cell right?"

"Yeah…I think something lured me down here." Sam's voice was calm and a little off, but Dean couldn't be positive…since he hadn't seen Sam for years, this might just be how Sam is now…_how the hell would Dean know the difference?_

"Yeah and I think I know who…Dr. Ellicott, that's what the other spirits have been trying to tell us. You haven't seen him have you?" Dean responded quickly as he looked around the room he'd just rolled into.

Sam continued to stand stoically, staring down at Dean his voice calm and far more controlled than it had any right to be. "How do you know it was him?"

Dean shifted his shotgun on his lap as he listened for anything that didn't sound right. "Cuz, I found his log book. Dr. Ellicott was experimenting on his patients…awful stuff. Makes lobotomy's look like a couple aspirin."

Sam tilted his head, "But…it was the patients who rioted…"

"Yeah, they were rioting against Dr. Ellicott. Dr. Feelgood was working on some sort of extreme rage therapy…he thought that if he could get his patients to vent their anger then they would be cured of it…but instead it only made it worse and worse and they just got angrier and angrier. So I think that his spirit is doing the same thing, to the cop, to the kids in the seventies, making them so angry that they become homicidal. Come on we gotta find his bones and torch'em." Dean started rolling through the narrow hallway.

"How? The police said they never found the body." Sam said matter of factly as his eyes narrowed and he tracked Dean's movements carefully.

"Well, the log book said he had some sort of hidden procedure room down here somewhere, where he could work on his patients…so…I mean if I was his patient I would've dragged his ass down here and done a little work on him myself. " Dean finished as he rolled around the edges of the room, looking for evidence of a hidden door or something.

"I don't know…it sounds kind of…." Sam's voice dropped off as he watched Dean roll, looking in all the _right_ places.

"Crazy?..." Dean finished without turning around and never seeing the look of anger that was settling on Sam's face. Dean saw a metal door as he neared the end of the corridor…he pulled it open carefully, readjusting his flashlight and rolled through.

Sam narrowed his eyes as he watched his brother search. "I told you I looked everywhere and I didn't find a hidden room."

Dean snorted. "That's why they're called _hidden…you hear that?_" There was the distinct sound of air whistling through a small opening behind them. Dean listened more carefully, ignoring Sam's 'bitch-face'.

Sam rolled his eyes, his irritation with his brother rising rapidly as he watched Dean dismiss his already thorough search of the area. He inhaled as he saw his brother pause, exactly where the door was hidden behind massive layers of dirt and an old cabinet.

"There's a door here…" Dean never even glanced over his shoulder; he just called out the information to Sam.

"Dean…move away from the door." Sam's rage was increasing exponentially as he stared at his older brother…the same brother that had done _everything_ that their father had ever asked. The brother that hadn't even contacted him about his injuries and then had made _him_ feel like the bad guy because he hadn't known. He could feel the ball of rage getting bigger and bigger the longer he stared into his brother's slowly widening green eyes as he put together the puzzle pieces. Sam lifted the shotgun and pointed it center mass on Dean's chest. At least this way his brother wouldn't have to suffer anymore and _he_ could back to school and his _real_ life…there would be nothing to make him feel guilty about walking away this time. Dean would be in a better place…

"Sam put the gun down." Dean said, his fear rising as he watched the blood start to trickle down from Sam's nose.

"Is that an order?" Sam asked calmly…but it didn't look like his little brother was the one in control at the moment.

"No…it's more of a friendly request." Dean answered through his teeth as he stared at the gun trained on his chest.

"Cuz I'm getting pretty tired of taking your orders." Sam brought the gun up slightly so it was pointed more at Dean's head than his chest as he stared angrily at his older brother.

"I knew it…Ellicott did something to you didn't he?" Dean asked as he watched his brother closely for any indication that he was getting through the '_ghost whammy_' that that bastard Ellicott had put on Sam.

"For once in your life just shut your mouth…" Sam ground out through clenched teeth, his anger nearly vibrating through his body as he looked at his brother, the gun dipped a little so it was back to chest level.

Dean's eyes widened to the size of saucers as he saw the expression on his brother's face and that the gun that was pointed directly at his chest…there was no way. Sam wouldn't shoot him…not even with the rock salt that was their current ammunition. "What're you gonna do Sam? The guns filled with rock salt…it's not gonna kill me."

The look of certainty on his older brother's face faltered and faded all together as he squeezed the trigger…Sam watched with a sense relief…and almost glee…as Dean was knocked backwards from his chair, the momentum taking him through the thin plywood door. He landed with a loud 'Umph…' his head cracking loudly against the concrete. His body going completely still immediately after hitting the floor…knocked unconscious.

Sam smiled and stepped forward looking at his handy work. "No…but it'll hurt like hell." He said simply. He watched as Dean started moving a few moments later, his head rolling to the side as he coughed loudly, bringing his hands to his head. There were pieces of plaster and dirt caught in his blonde hair and a thin stream of blood trickling from one ear as he looked up at his brother…the blatant betrayal in his green eyes was so plain that Sam felt his rage gather even more energy.

"Sam…we gotta burn Ellicott's bones and all this'll be over…you'll be back to normal." Dean managed through gritted teeth as he tried to focus around the pounding in his head. And the unbelievable knowledge that his little brother had just 'shot' him with rock salt…at point blank range.

"I am normal…I'm just telling the truth for the first time. I mean why're we even here Dean. Cuz you're following dad's orders like a good little soldier…oh wait, that's right he left your worthless ass…" Sam gestured toward Dean's splayed body with the shot gun and then to his own temple in emphasis. "I have a mind…I'm not pathetic like you…and I've got two good legs. What've you got Dean…Hunh? Nothing. You are nothing…daddy's blunt little instrument. Even he knew how worthless you are Dean… You're nothing but an obedient little soldier, always doing exactly as you're told! But you can't think for yourself Dean…and now…well you're just a tiny twisted _piece_ of the hunter you used to be… "

"Sam…this isn't you talkin…" Dean said softly. His own heart was breaking a little more with every venom filled word that was spat out of Sam's mouth in hatred. Dean had never even suspected that Sam had so much hatred for him buried inside himself.

"Shut up! " Sam cried as he stepped forward and pointed the shot gun at Dean again.

The same brother that he'd beat up bullies for, given up the last bowl of every box of cereal that they had as kids, that he had defended to their father…and finally that he had taken the beatings for…when Sam's choice pissed off their father…all so that Sam wouldn't have those awful memories. The hatred that was blasting out of Sam's normally jovial eyes was cutting Dean to shreds internally. He'd never known that Sam felt that way…he knew that their father thought he was a waste of perfectly good oxygen…but it had never occurred to him that his brother might be thinking the exact same thing. He brought his hand up to rest on his chest as the wounds from the multiple pieces of imbedded rock salt burned painfully. But they were nothing compared to the tattered remains of his heart.

Dean tried to assess the damage, he figured that he probably had a couple of bruised ribs…maybe a broken one and definitely a concussion since he was having a hard time focusing on what was happening right in front of him. "Okay…" he pulled his Taurus from his belt and held it up to Sam, watching as his brother pointed the shot gun more forcefully and then thinking better of it…dropped his gun and reached for Dean's pistol. Taking a clean aim at Dean's head.

"You hate me that much? You think you can kill your own brother? Then go ahead…pull the trigger…" Dean's voice was soft and resigned as he stared up at his baby brother." He watched with a sinking heart as Sam re-gripped the gun and then immediately pointed it more forcefully at Dean's head. "

Sam shifted his weight forward so the gun was less than two feet from Dean's face. Dean's expression shifted to one of complete acceptance, his eyes tracking Sam's movements.

"Do it!" Dean yelled and then visibly flinched, his eyes reflecting his soul rending disappointment and betrayal, when he heard the hammer slam home as Sam pulled the trigger not just once but four times…four distinct attempts at fratricide. Dean watched with a shattered heart as Sam stared at the gun in complete confusion.

It was Dean's gun and that thing never jammed, not in all the years that they had hunted with their father.

Dean used the distraction and grabbed for the gun with the last of his remaining strength, then he pulled Sam's surprised body toward himself, slamming his fist into his brother's face. Sam caught Dean's knuckles on his chin and was immediately out cold, his heavy body collapsing on top of Dean's smaller frame.

Being pinned to the floor by his enormously heavy little brother wasn't anywhere close to Dean's idea of a happy ending. He pushed with reserves of strength that he dredged up from god knows where, finally rolling Sam off to the side.

"Man…I'm not gonna give you a loaded pistol…" Dean said, his normally sarcastic tone shining through unintentionally, as he looked for his damn wheel chair. He finally saw it on the other side of the smashed door. "Damn-it!" he swore as he pulled his pain racked body across the cold concrete floor, his chest burning with every inch he gained, the rock salt jamming deeper into his abused flesh. After what felt like days he was finally able to reach for his chair, he grabbed a hold of the metal wheel, pulling the chair closer, then shifting his fingers to the armrests and pulled himself into the waiting contraption. Dean grunted in agony as white hot pain went shooting through his chest; he could feel the shift of the rock salt and the tickle of blood as it seeped from the larger holes, dripping down his chest only to soak into the waistband of his jeans.

Dean rolled around his unconscious brother; as he shifted himself in the chair, leaning down to check Sam's pulse…_which was strongly thrumming along_. Thank god.

"Sorry Sammy…" Dean whispered as he moved away from his brother's prone body and toward the hidden room. He looked around the place seeing a few places that would have been large enough to hide a body. As he reached the white metal cabinet, he thought he felt something whoosh past his back; he spun his chair and scanned the room for anything unusual. _Although that's kinda relative considering that we're hunting a ghost._ He thought.

Dean didn't see anything, but he was too well versed in the supernatural to believe that '_if you can't see it…it isn't there_.' He inhaled deeply and then turned back, reaching out to pull open the doors, he saw tufts of hair sticking out of the corner…_Gotcha…you bastard!_ He thought as he reached for the salt and the lighter that were in his bag on the back of his chair. He sprinkled the salt over the body, holding his nose with one hand trying to avoid breathing in the intense stench that always surrounded a decaying body. He felt the bile travel up his throat and threaten to spill itself all over the dirty floor. He bit it back down…he could throw up when the job was done. Sam needed him to take out this son of a bitch…_he had to save Sammy_…

"Oh…that's just gross…Soak it up…" he said as he poured lighter fluid onto the body, striking his lighter just as he felt that strange 'something' again. He was just turning his head when two hands shot out and knocked him out of his chair again…they were trying to latch onto either side of his face.

"Don't worry…I'm gonna make it all better…" The ghost was pretty hideous, it looked as though the patients had given the good doctor a lobotomy of his own before they killed him and stuffed the body in the metal cabinet. Dean thrust his hands up and pushed at the ghost's arms, trying to loosen them from his face. Dean struggled, his chest burning with pain and the lack of the use of his legs making him want to just give up…but he couldn't…_Sam…gotta save Sammy…_

He felt his fingers slip across his lighter; he pulled his hand back and finally grabbed the little silver lighter. Dean flicked it open and turned his head as he struggled with his other arm with the ghost; he struck the lighter and tossed it onto the corpse. He watched with tremendous satisfaction as Ellicott sat back, held his hands up and started to turn to ashes in front of Dean's eyes. When it looked like the ghost might actually 'explode' Dean pulled himself into a small ball and watched through his fingers as the ashes fell and broke apart on the cement floor moments later, instead of exploding.

He glanced over at Sam, grateful to see that his little brother was starting to regain consciousness…because, otherwise, they were going to be down here until he did. It's not like Dean could carry his brother's heavy ass out of this Asylum. "You're not gonna try and kill me are ya?"

Sam's face was confused; he was holding his chin open in pain from the blow Dean had landed there earlier. He held his hand up to his face as he came into a seated position, "No." he said as he tried to pull the disjointed memories together. He watched as Dean again hauled himself back into his chair, a groan of pain escaping as he settled once again into the chair and turned so he was looking at Sam.

"Good…cuz that'd be awkward." Dean said as he concentrated on breathing through the pain that was shooting through his entire body.

Sam didn't know what to say…he remembered everything. Every horrible, awful thing that he'd said to his brother…he had a clear recollection of…and he'd never been more ashamed or carried more self-loathing than he did at the moment as he watched Dean roll toward him and reach to help him to his feet. Dean then leaned over and grabbed his pistol from the floor, setting it on his lap he started rolling out of the room. Sam bent over to pick up his rock salt gun and followed along slowly, his brother leading them out of the old hospital. The two kids had already left ahead of them, after Dean had told them to 'stay out of haunted asylums'…they'd both agreed whole heartedly.

As they got back to the Impala, Sam looked over the front of the car at his brother, "Dean…I'm sorry. I said some really awful things."

Dean glanced up, pulling his hand from his chest to open the passenger door…he didn't think he should drive…not with a concussion. Not to mention the fact that he was having a hard time focusing his thoughts…they kept wandering. "You remember all that?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, it's like I couldn't control it. But I didn't mean it…any of it."

Dean cocked his head and his lips twitched. "You didn't huh?" He didn't believe _that_ for one second…there was no way that Sam didn't mean it…those feelings had come from somewhere. The ghost didn't create ideas; he simply removed the filter and allowed the anger to surface in all its raging glory. All those ideas…they had come from somewhere deep inside his brother, and he'd meant every damn word of it.

"No, of course not….do we need to talk about this?" Sam asked as he saw the look on his brother's face. Dean didn't believe him…he could see it plainly written on his older brother's face.

Dean raised his eyebrows, slammed his wall into place and settled himself into the car, folding his wheelchair and watching as Sam walked around to put it in the back. "No…I'm not really in the sharing and caring kinda mood. I just wanna get some sleep."

XXXX

Sam tried to get Dean to take the first turn in the bathroom once they got back to the motel…but in the typical fashion of his selfless older brother…he had refused and told Sam to go ahead. Sam had crawled under the spray of the hot water, he had allowed it to cascade over sore muscles and tried not think of the look on his brother's face when he'd shot him…_shot him!_ Sam had shot his brother…at close range with rock salt…Sam felt his knees buckle as that memory slammed into his head. He'd remembered saying all that horrible crap to Dean…but he hadn't remembered _shooting_ him. He felt the tears spill hot and fast down his cheeks, he took about two minutes to try and pull himself together before he was reaching up to turn off the water and scrambling out of the shower to grab a towel. He quickly threw on his boxers and a pair of jogging pants as he rushed from the bathroom scanning the motel room for his brother.

"Dean?" he called into the dim room.

He heard a muffled groan from the bed closest to the wall; he rushed over and looked at Dean lying on the bed, his chair pushed up against the wall. Dean's hands were clutching at his chest in obvious pain and there was a thin sheen of sweat glistening off his forehead. "Dean!" Sam cried as he flipped on the lamp next to the bed, he leaned over Dean and couldn't help but notice the blood that speckled his dark grey t-shirt, which explained why he hadn't noticed it before, and had soaked into the waistband of his jeans. Sam reached out to gently feel Dean's forehead for signs of fever and didn't have to get close to feel the heat rolling off his brother. He could see the way Dean's eyes were shifting back and forth quickly beneath his closed eyelids.

"Damn-it Dean! Why can't anything ever be easy with you?" Sam said in exasperation as he sat down near his brother's hip and gently pulled the soiled shirt up…getting his first good look at the damage that _he _had caused. Dean's chest was a multi-colored spectrum of purples along with still un-dissolved pieces of salt imbedded in the bloodied wounds. Sam sat back and brought his fist to his mouth as his emotions threatened to over whelm him again…_God…I did this to him…_He swallowed and then steeled his nerves to deal with his brother's obvious injuries.

He stood up and walked back to the bathroom removing several washcloths and wetting a bunch of towels…he also grabbed the emergency first aid kit and walked tiredly back into the room to deal with Dean. He hadn't even sat down before Dean's head rolled from side to side and he started mumbling…things that Sam couldn't hear clearly…but that sounded like '_No dad…I'm sorry…I tried…Sorry I'm not Sam…_' Sam stopped cold in his tracks and stared at his brother in disbelief. He couldn't' have heard that right. _Dean, we are soooo having a long talk when you wake up. _He told himself. Sam closed the distance sitting down quickly and pulling his brother's dirty t-shirt off as carefully as possible. He wasn't quite prepared for the numerous white scars littering his brother's torso…he'd known that Dean had gotten hurt on several hunts when they were kids…but he'd never thought that it had happened _this _often.

There were white lines criss-crossing Dean's chest…almost like someone had marked him intentionally. That he had been hurt on _purpose_…Sam was pulled from his musings as Dean's eyes suddenly stopped moving and his brother's upper body went rigid in what Sam could only describe as a seizure rocketed through Dean.

"DEAN!" Sam called frantically as he tried to keep Dean's head from smashing into the headboard.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _So cliff hanger I know…they suck. But It will get the next chapter up quickly and I did warn that this chapter would veer off course with the episode, because of Dean's wheel chair issues. So I'll hurry.__ If you're worried that Dean is going to turn into some kind of victim in this fiction, don't be...I wouldn't taint the amazing characterizations that Jensen Ackles has brought to that character that way. Dean's a strong character that has to deal with this shitty situation and most of that will happen internally...just like it does in the series._

**Please Review: It'll make me write faster…promise.**


	4. Injuries and Revelations

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster..._**

**Chapter 4**

_Injuries and Revelations_

Sam watched with rising horror as the upper half of Dean's body seized, all the muscles clenching at the same time as his eyes rolled back and forth rapidly beneath his closed eyelids. It was surreal to see only half of Dean's body moving while the lower half remained eerily still. After what felt like a lifetime later…but was in fact only minutes, Dean's body relaxed as his head lolled to the side, exposing the thick trail of blood that had dried in a line from his ear down his neck disappearing below the collar of his shirt. Sam inhaled sharply as he saw the evidence of a serious head injury so blatantly exposed. _God…how di d I miss that?_ He asked himself in disgust.

Sam rushed to grab cold towels and then hurried back to Dean's side, placing the cold compresses against Dean's red and flushed skin, the heat was radiated outward and he wanted to slink into a corner and hide. Once he had laid the towel across Dean's forehead, he jumped up to grab the ear thermometer from the medical kit and placed it gently in the ear without the blood. He waited the couple of seconds necessary for the thing to read the internal temperature, it beeped and read 104.3. That had Sam scrubbing his hand across his face in frustration; he stood up and opened the door to the motel, glancing in either direction for the ice machine. He finally spotted small metal machine that glowed with the words 'ice' at the end of the walkway, he grabbed the ice bucket and rushed to fill the thing…it took several trips to and from the machine to get enough ice in the bathtub so that he could submerged Dean in the small tub in order to reduce the fever. He knew that this was going to be incredibly uncomfortable, that Dean was going to feel like he was freezing…but they had to get that temperature down. He stripped off Dean's jeans and got his first real look at Dean's emaciated legs and the far too numerous scars that were randomly scattered over the white and slightly freckled skin.

"God…Dean…" he breathed as he remembered how callously he had thrown Dean's lack of the use of those broken limbs back at Dean a few hours ago. His eyes started to go fuzzy as the tears filled them and he sat back, trying to get a hold of his rampaging guilt. He didn't know what had happened to Dean while he'd been in school…but he had every intention of finding out. He swallowed and leaned down to gently pick up his brother…immediately noticing how easy it was, Dean stood nearly 6'2 when he was _standing,_ Sam knew that he shouldn't be able to lift his brother this easily. They would need to do something about the weight loss once Dean was on the mend. He walked the few steps to the bathroom and gently lowered Dean into the ice bath.

The effect was instantaneous as Dean's body reacted, as violently as it could with only half of it responding to the electrical impulses, to the extreme change in temperature. He moaned and shook his head back and forth as he tried to pull himself away from the freezing cold that was trying to infiltrate his body. "No….too…c…cold…" he moaned out, making Sam feel even more guilty, if that was even possible at this point.

"Dean…we gotta get you cooled down…" he whispered as he took a wash cloth and placed on Dean's forehead. The water had taken on a pinkish hue as the blood was washed from Dean's chest and the salt finished dissolving, leaving only the massive purple bruising and the holes where the salt had broken through layers of skin only to imbed themselves deep within the pale chest of his brother. Sam glanced across Dean's body in search of other wounds he may have missed, he saw there was the start of a decent bruise across Dean's ribcage on the left side…_damn-it!_ That means either cracked or broken ribs…

Sam tried not to look at Dean's chest anymore as he waited the necessary five minutes that they usually gave to the person in the ice, and then he was pulling Dean from the ice cold water. His brother was shivering…at his upper half was shivering. His lips had taken on a slightly blue tint as his teeth chattered together and his head rolled from side to side in response to the cold. He was semi-conscious now as Sam picked him up and watched with growing frustration as his brother's eyes rolled beneath the slightly parted lids. "Come on Dean…" he said as he laid Dean back on the bed. He tried to wrap the clean towels around his shivering brother; Dean's soaking wet boxers were hanging loosely on his far too lean hips exposing even more white scars on the hips bones. "What the hell happened to you Dean…" he asked as he reached for the alcohol. He knew that this was going to sting like hell, but he needed to clean those wounds.

Before he attacked his brother with the antiseptic, he placed the thermometer back in Dean's ear and listened for the beep. Once it had alerted him, Sam pulled it out and was relieved to see that it read 102.6. That wasn't great, but it was at least acceptable. He poured the alcohol directly onto the numerous wounds littering Dean's chest, his brother's face immediately pinching in pain as he gritted his teeth against the white hot agony that was washing across his chest.

"Sorry Dean…sorry…sorry…" Sam kept repeating as he wiped the bloody liquid from Dean's skin. He felt the tears start to roll as he saw his brother's glassy eyes open and then roll around until they crashed into his, but the instant hardening of those emerald eyes made Sam sit back and look away. When he looked back up, Dean's eyes were shut again, but his breathing was more even and his skin was less flushed.

The look of hardened sorrow that had been reflected out his brother's eyes had cut Sam to the bone. He reached over and gently placed the bandages on the multiple wounds; he then carefully wrapped them with gauze wraps and then bundled Dean up beneath the heavy comforter.

Sam was sitting in one of the chairs at the crappy table in their room, when his cell phone rang. He reached for it automatically, not even checking the caller ID. He was surprised when Bobby's gruff voice came over the line, "Sam?"

"Yeah…hey Bobby." He said automatically.

Sam's tone set off warning bells in Bobby's head as he listened to the kid breathe raggedly on the other end of the phone. "You boys okay?"

Sam chuckled without any trace of humor as he ran his hand through his hair and leaned forward on his elbows. "No…Bobby. We stopped at this Asylum that Dean wanted to check out…and the ghost…"he stopped unable to continue for a moment, his throat thick with emotions.

"What happened Sam…is Dean okay?" Bobby rushed forward when it didn't appear as though Sam could speak for a moment.

"The ghost…it touched me…made me say horrible things to Dean…things I didn't mean." Sam finished as his voice tightened.

"Idgits! I told you two to come here…why'd you stop for a hunt?" Bobby growled, his own fear ramping up as he heard the broken tone of Sam's voice. "What did it say…?"

Sam shook his head, the tears starting to roll down his cheeks again as he ran his own awful words through his head again. "Bad stuff Bobby…" he managed around the lump in his throat.

"Okay…so how close are you to me?" Bobby asked, taking his baseball cap off and running his own hand through his hair before replacing it.

"At least a day…but Dean got hurt and we might not be there for a couple of days…" Sam said quietly.

"Balls! Where exactly are you Sam? I'll come to you." Bobby told the young hunter.

Sam gave Bobby the address and then got enough control of himself to ask Bobby one more question about his brother. "Bobby…Dean's got a lot of scars…more than he could have gotten just from hunting…you know anything about that?" Sam asked slowly.

He heard the slow inhale of air as Bobby decided exactly what he should tell Sam…particularly over the phone…it was certainly something that he thought that Sam should know, although he knew Dean wouldn't want him explaining anything to the youngest Winchester. He weighed just how pissed Dean would be about Sam finding out about what their father had done. His guess…_royally pissed off._ "Yeah Sam…I know something about those scars…but why don't we talk about it when I get there…it's kinda an in person sorta thing." Bobby made the instant decision that he would be talking to Sam about all the shit that had gone down after he'd walked out on his brother all those years ago.

Sam just stared at the wall as his mind ran in a million different directions…just what the hell Bobby had meant that it was something he had to hear in person. If those scars were from hunting…the old hunter would have simply told him on the phone. So that meant that there was definitely something _bad_ that had gone down after he left for college…something that neither Dean nor Bobby really wanted to talk about.

"S'mmy…?" came a muffled question from the direction of the lump on Dean's bed. Sam's eyes immediately shot up to connect to the fever bright green gaze of his older brother. "You…okay?" Dean finished as he looked Sam up and down checking his little brother for injuries. His hands were clutching the comforter in pain as he watched Sam.

Sam moved to the bed and sat on the edge, his hands itching to touch his brother…but not daring to. "I'm fine Dean…but you got hurt…" Dean rolled his eyes, like he expected to get hurt…like it was no big deal. "I hurt you Dean…" Sam whispered, his eyes still watching the incredibly interesting pattern on his pants. He couldn't quite bring himself to look his brother in the eyes yet.

Dean shook his head and brought his hand up to touch his chest absently. "Wasn't your fault Sam…don't worry about it." That brought his blue-green eyes up and Sam watched with dismay as his brother dismissed what Sam'd done to him in less than two seconds flat…and Sam felt his anger start to bubble again as he saw firsthand just exactly how little Dean valued his own life. He shouldn't have been able to simply forgive Sam for what he'd done, not that quickly…even if it _had _been the result of a '_ghost whammy_' as Dean would put it.

Sam started to say something else, but Dean interrupted him, his voice stronger and his words far clearer than before. "No Sam! I said forget it…and I meant it. Look, bad shit happens, it comes with the job…I got thicker skin than you give me credit for…and I don't want to talk about this okay." Dean ground out through his clenched teeth as he stared with guarded eyes that were silently pleading with Sam to let it go… Sam's eyebrows came together in frustration as he turned from Dean's intense gaze and bit his lip as he tried desperately to _let it go._

"Whatever…" Sam finally breathed out as he turned from Dean's injured form and walked to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and walking back to the bed. He handed the opened bottle to Dean and watched as Dean took the plastic bottle in trembling hands and brought it to his parched lips. "Look, I'm going to go to the gas station and grab some Gatorade and something to eat…any requests?"

Dean swallowed at the thought that Sam might not come back…he might be trying to leave him…just like their dad had. But if that _was_ what was going on…it's not like he could prevent it. "Pie…"he said simply and then added, "M&M's…the peanut kind." Sam's head tilted to the side and he couldn't help the smile that crinkled his eyes at his brother's typical response. Dean would request junk food rather than a real meal. _At least that part of Dean hasn't changed in the last few years._ It was about the only about his brother that seemed to be the same as when they were kids…everything else was so guarded and different that Sam was having a hard time reconciling the man lying in the bed with the strong cocky brother that he remembered growing up. He hadn't known it then, but the whole persona that Dean portrayed had been an act…but he could see it now.

"I'll see what I can find Dean." He answered as he grabbed his jacket and then handed Dean his cell phone before he walked out. "Call me if you need something Dean…I'll only be about fifteen minutes."

Dean nodded and reached out gingerly taking his phone and setting it next to his hip. "Uh Sam?" he called, causing Sam to turn around. "Remote." Dean finished and forced a smile onto his face, holding his hand out as Sam tossed the remote and Dean caught it, despite his fuzzy vision.

True to his word, Sam was only gone 14 minutes and Dean had spent those fourteen minutes replaying the things Sam had said as he bit his lip and stared at the blank screen of their tv. He knew that Sam had meant the words…but he also knew that Sam wouldn't have said them without the interference of the ghost. He inhaled and then instantly regretted the deep breath as his chest lit up in pain and his rib protested the movement. He heard the Impala pull back into the lot and he closed his eyes in relief that Sam had indeed returned for him. This constant worry about being left was really starting to weigh on him…he needed to deal with it or else he was going to push Sam away. And that was the last thing that Dean wanted.

The door to the room creaked open and Sam pulled the key from the lock as he set down 2 small bags on the table, reaching behind himself to push the door closed. His eyes flickered over to Dean's bed and he was surprised to see Dean was still awake and watching him wearily from the cocoon of blankets.

"Pie?" Dean asked hopeful as he eyed the bags on the table.

"Trying to use your x-ray vision there superman?" Sam smirked at the look of disgust on Dean's face at the comment.

"Never wanted to be superman dude…I'm batman…remember." Dean snarked back as his eyebrows rose and he smiled slightly at Sam.

Sam couldn't help the smile that spread quickly across his face, he'd forgotten his brothers less than healthy obsession with the dark knight. Dean had always been batman when they were kids…Sam had always had to be someone else.

"Uh-huh." Sam said as he unloaded the bags and pulled out the piece of pie inside a plastic container. "Apple okay?" he asked, knowing that it was Dean's favorite.

Dean's eyes lit up, he was still a little nauseated from the concussion and his face felt like he'd spent far too much time in the sun…the heat still radiating off him as he nodded. He wanted to just forget that this whole incident at the asylum had ever happened. He knew that Sam wouldn't be satisfied with that though, and he was dreading when Sam would bring up the sensitive issue again.

XXXX

Bobby showed up around 3am, knocking on the door of the motel room and waiting as he heard the soft shuffle of one of the boys on the other side…Sam…it would have to be Sam, since Dean didn't _shuffle_ anymore. Sam pulled the door open and stared tiredly at the old Hunter, he smiled and allowed Bobby to pull him into a tight bear hug. "Damn it's good to see you boy." He said as he pounded Sam on the back in affection. His eyes swept into the room and he couldn't' help but notice the wheel chair sitting idly in the corner next to Dean's bed. His sharp eyes shot back to Sam's and then over to Dean with the question written all over his face. 'Why was there a wheel chair in their room?'

Dean swallowed hard and then met Bobby's eyes… "Um…yeah…so I can't walk….surprise." he said with no humor as he watched the news slam into the old hunter and his sharp blue eyes widened with understanding.

"What?" Bobby asked, more out of habit than anything else. He thought that these boys knew that they could contact him when things went wrong…apparently Dean hadn't gotten that message.

"Can't walk…got hurt more than a year ago…" Dean answered simply. His voice was void of emotion as he finally said it out loud.

Bobby exploded, "Why the hell didn't you call me boy!" he yelled and then immediately regretted it as Dean shrank back into the pillows. His fever bright eyes wide and tinged with a touch of fear. _Damn-it._ Bobby thought as he remembered the specific reason that Dean and his father had been out of his life for the last four years…the kid was probably waiting for him to cuff upside the head for failing to let him know about his injury. "Sorry kid…what happened?" he said more softly. Truthfully, it hit him right in the heart that Dean hadn't felt that he could come to Bobby for help…and he was going to make sure that the kid didn't feel attacked as a result of his hurt feelings.

Dean looked down as he spoke… "I don't really know…we were on a hunt and the next thing I know I'm waking up in the hospital alone and unable to walk."

Bobby watched as Dean recounted the quick and dirty version of the accident, "Where was your dad?"

Dean shrugged and refused to meet Bobby's eyes. "Don't know…he wasn't there when I woke up and I haven't seen him since."

Bobby took a step forward and then stopped when Dean visibly flinched. "He just left you…alone?"

Dean nodded slightly and continued to look anywhere but at the two men standing in the doorway. Bobby shifted and then decided that he would address this at a later time when Sam wasn't standing there listening to everything that his older brother was trying desperately to hide.

Dean watched the whole interaction between the old family friend and his brother with interest. He was glad that Bobby cold simply accept Sam back into his life, as though nothing had ever happened. His chest was burning as he shifted slightly in the bed and reached over to turn on the light next to his bed. Bobby's eyes connected with his as the movement drew his attention, "Dean…So how're ya feeling boy?" he asked as he stepped past Sam and set his bag on the table.

"M'okay Bobby…you?" Dean answered quietly.

Bobby reached down and patted him gently on the shoulder and then looked back at Sam who was still standing in the open door. "You gonna just stand there like the ugly girl at the prom?" he said.

Sam inhaled and then stepped into the room, gently closing the door and walking to the fridge and removing a couple of beers from it. He handed one to Bobby and pointedly ignored Dean's irritated expression when he didn't offer one to his injured brother. "Thanks." Bobby said as he moved to sit in the chair next to the small table. "So tell me about this hunt…" he asked as he took a drink of the beer and looked at the brother's in expectation.

Dean's eyes connected with Sam's and he could tell that his brother was silently pleading with him to leave out the nastier parts of that hunt. Sam narrowed his eyes and shook his head, watching as Dean dropped his head onto his chest. The action was so familiar to Sam, he'd seen Dean avoid many arguments with him as a kid by simply shutting down and that was what he was seeing now…and it was breaking his heart.

Sam proceeded to explain the hunt, but he was a little selective about how much he told Bobby…he could see Dean slowly checking back into the conversation as he avoided the more awful parts of the evening. Sam had every intention of telling Bobby everything, but it wasn't going to happen while Dean was awake. Luckily Bobby had brought some pretty good pain meds with him, which Sam promptly bullied Dean into swallowing. More than an hour later Dean was finally resting, not the twisted version of sleep that he usually had, but actually resting.

Sam was sitting across from Bobby, peeling the label off his beer bottle. "So…." Bobby began and Sam's eyes shot up to the old hunter's concerned face.

"What?" Sam asked.

Bobby crinkled his forehead and leaned forward with his hands on his knees. "What is it you want to know Sam." He asked quietly.

Sam made a face and then shook his head. "What the hell happened while I was gone Bobby?" his eyes were drawn back to the bed and his brother's sleeping form.

"It wasn't a good time Sam." Bobby said tiredly.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Brotherly angst and comfort galore in the next chapter. I wanted to separate them out, Bobby will be an integral part of the boys trying to move on with the hunt for both their father and a possible solution to Dean's injury. The brothers will be headed out on the road soon and getting into trouble on another hunt…good old Winchester luck._

**Please Review: Best part is hearing what you guys think about the story.**


	5. Things I Wish I didn't Know

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only… **_**There is some language in this chapter...you've been warned.**_

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster... _**

**Chapter 5**

_Things I wish I didn't know_

Sam watched as Bobby sighed and glanced back at the sleeping form of his big brother who was still cocooned in the ratty old comforter that passed as a blanket on the crappy motel bed. He looked over at the old hunter, Bobby's face was a mask of….something that Sam couldn't really recognize…anger…sadness…something. "Bobby…what happened?" Sam pressed. He watched as the old man wrestled with himself and instantly recognized the moment that he'd won and the other man turned back to him and inhaled deeply leaning back in his chair tiredly.

"You ain't gonna like it Sam." He said quietly as he leaned back even further and slumped down as the weight of what he knew settled fully on his shoulders taking a long draw on his beer.

Sam had absolutely no doubt about that…he knew that he wasn't going to like anything that Bobby had to say here. It was obvious that the older hunter knew what the hell had gone down with Dean and it was every bit as obvious that he _really _didn't want to talk about it…any more than his damned stubborn brother did. "Bobby…I need to know." Sam said gently, glancing over at Dean as his brother shifted slightly in his sleep pulling the blanket closer around his slim shoulders and then drifting quickly back to sleep.

"Okay…the last time that I saw your daddy and brother was three and half years ago…I ain't talked to either of them since. So whatever happened after the last time…I can't really say for sure…" Bobby looked back Dean again, and pulled his free hand across his face before he looked back at Sam.

Sam narrowed his eyes at the other man; he knew this technique…_hell his brother had probably taught Bobby how to stall for time_… "Bobby…" he pushed.

The other man sighed. "They showed up after a hunt in Missouri. Dean was banged all to hell and your daddy was pissed off about it." Sam interrupted him.

"So wait…let me get this straight. Dean was hurt and my dad was pissed at him for it?" Sam cocked his head to the side and looked irritated as hell as his eyes flickered back to his brother's silent form.

"You gonna let me tell this story?" Bobby said with raised eyebrows.

"Yeah…uh…sorry." Sam said as he sat back in his chair folding his arms across his broad chest and waited for the elder hunter to continue.

Bobby nodded and continued, "As I was saying…Dean was banged all to hell…but the injuries weren't right for the type of hunt they'd been on. I asked Dean about it and he just clammed up, wouldn't say a thing. But since I was the one that patched the kid up, and my father had been a rotten _son of a bitch_…I recognized the signs." He watched as Sam's eyebrows scrunched together as he started piecing together what Bobby was telling him…and the youngest Winchester didn't like where this was headed…not one fucking bit. "I confronted John about the bruising around his eye, the split in Dean's chin and the broken wrist…he lied at first, but I kept pushing him and he'd finally broken down and said that he'd lost his temper with Dean…something about him digging too slow or something…or it was the wrong type of 'evil' they were hunting…I don't really remember. I was so pissed Sam." Bobby's eyes narrowed and his lips thinned as he remembered that particular conversation…it hadn't gone well…for either of them.

Sam sucked in a breath of air and his blue-green eyes widened and then narrowed in a sudden surge of intense anger… "My father hit him…?" he said simply.

Bobby took another swig of his beer and looked over at the sleeping form on the bed, he sighed… "Yeah Sam…and it wasn't the first time and I'm damn sure it wasn't the last. I told John to knock that shit off or he was free to find himself another place to stay."

Sam voice was picking up intensity. "You kicked them out when you knew my father was _beating_ Dean, using him as his own personal punching bag?" Sam asked incredulously.

Bobby rolled his eyes and reached up, pulling his ballcap off and running his hands over his grey hair and replacing it. "No…I kicked your _father _out…at the end of my shotgun. I told Dean he was allowed to stay…but you know your brother…he wouldn't abandon your daddy. So they both left and that was the last I heard from either of them until recently. Sam I know this isn't something you want to hear…but your brother…he needs you_. He_ needs _you_ Sam."

Bobby couldn't have pushed that guilty knife any deeper into Sam's chest as he watched his brother breath shallowly on the motel bed. He slumped back in his chair and scrubbed his hand down his face. "I didn't know _any_ of this Bobby…I honestly never thought…" Sam's voice broke as he finally had a clearer picture of just what his older brother had been put up with while he was off at school…_safe_.

"You think I don't know that Sam? Hell, you think your brother don't know that too?" He stood and walked to the sink, dumping out the rest of his beer and reaching for water instead.

"I really thought he'd be okay…that he would just move forward in life. I didn't think that my…" he cut the word 'father' off and switched it for… "John…would ever hurt him… Dean was his little shadow. He did everything the man ever asked of him…hell, Dean…he took care of both of us." Sam's voice dropped to a whisper as the guilt poured through his system making it impossible for him to say anymore.

Bobby walked back over and laid a gentle hand on Sam's shoulder. "I know that son. And your brother…he knows that too. But it looks like life has been a lot harder on him than you…and he needs you to be strong and help him through this…he needs help Sam…and he ain't gonna come right and ask for it…cuz that just ain't Dean."

Sam nodded. He knew that even the simple fact that Dean had called him was damn amazing, but to ever think that Dean would muddy up his father's memory…_yeah…well there was no way in hell that'd ever happen_…not on Dean's watch. "So why do you think he's so dead set on finding John?"

Bobby shrugged slightly and then looked away as a thought occurred to him. "He might think that what happened to him that night…on that hunt is reversible? Your daddy's the only one that really knows what happened there."

Sam shook his head, his long bangs bouncing across his forehead. "No…he said he didn't think that it was…I asked already."

"Well, maybe he lied to you Sam…wouldn't be the first time that Dean lied about his motives. If he thinks that those motives might cause _you_ any pain at all…he'd just brush 'em under the table as unimportant."

Sam chewed his lower lip as he considered the all the things that Bobby was telling him. His older brother had been his father's whipping boy for several years…and it sounded as though his leaving for Stanford had been the catalyst. He felt his chest tighten at that thought…that his going to college had caused so much pain an aguish for his brother. Sam would've done anything to avoid hurting Dean. "So this…this is my fault?" Sam whispered, his eyes filling with tears at the thought. He couldn't bring himself to meet Bobby's eyes.

"Damn-it boy! No…this is your daddy's fault. And Dean's too a little bit…he should have left or stood up for himself…but he'd been molded 'to obey' from the time he was four years old, molded to 'take orders' and 'don't ask questions'. Both of those mandates making him the perfect the little soldier…"

Sam tuned out at the word 'soldier', _shit I called him that…and worse._ He thought as the words that he had spat at his brother in anger flashed through his head and he leaned forward to quiet the nausea that was starting to roll in his gut. Sam's eyes flashed up to Dean in the bed and he was instantly horrified to see the confused green eyes of his brother staring at the two of them. "Dean…?" Sam said as he started to stand. Dean continued to blink slowly at them, without comprehension, causing Sam to wonder exactly how much Dean had actually heard…he now knew that some serious _shit_ had gone down while he was gone, but he still didn't know exactly how bad it had been. Sam had no intention of pushing this kind of emotional trauma on his brother…at least not right now. Dean's was watching Sam quietly, when his eyes slipped closed and he drifted off to sleep again.

"Damn…" Bobby said as he turned back to the injured young hunter.

"God…Dean…" Sam said and turned burning eyes back to Bobby, the tears once again blurring his vision. He'd never meant to hurt his brother and yet that seemed to be all he was doing. Bobby laid a hand on his shoulder and grabbed his bag off the table.

"I'm gonna go get a room for the rest of the night; call me if you need anything Sam." He squeezed Sam's shoulder gently and then looked at the still and silent form ignorant of both of them. "I'll talk to you later kid." He looked at his boots and then left the room. Sam scrubbed his palm over his face and sighed as he walked over to his bed and then slumped down, lying so that he was facing his brother.

"I'm sorry Dean…" He whispered into the darkness.

XXXX

Sam was standing in front of a window; he was watching a scene that looked like something that he would have seen a million times growing up, on any one of the numerous hunts he'd been on with his brother. Dean was out by the Impala…he looked younger though and he was _standing_…not _rolling_ in the wheelchair that Sam knew was a permanent part of his existence now. He turned and glanced around the room, it looked like anyone of a hundred rooms that they had spent their childhoods in. Sam turned back to the slowly fading light in the parking lot; he could hear his brother talking to the Impala…Okay, that wasn't all that unusual…Dean _loved_ his car, always had. 'I know baby…I miss him too.' Dean ran his fingers along the shiny black paint.

His gaze suddenly shifted up, causing Sam to glance in the same direction. Their father came stomping into view, his face a scowling mass of anger as he marched right up to Dean and slammed his fist into the surprised young hunter's face. Red blossomed across Dean's chin, a cut opening along his jaw, as he dropped to his knees, his hand coming up to grasp at the painful area. Sam started to yell and bang on the window, in order to stop his father…but nothing got their attention. He ran to the door and pulled against the stubborn wooden barrier, only to discover that the door wouldn't budge. He sprinted back to the window and watched with rising horror as John screamed at his brother's crumpled form. Dean was holding his bleeding chin, an inch long split evident in the tanned skin, blood dripping rapidly over his fingers. But it was his brother's eyes that really got Sam's attention…they were haunted and betrayed and there was something that Sam had never seen on his brother's face before…fear.

'_You almost got me killed Dean! Why can't you be better at the research…you screwed this up…again!'_ John was punctuating the accusations with blows to his brother's crumpled form. Sam could feel the tears starting to slide down his face as he watched his father _beat_ his brother… 'Sam never would have made that mistake!' John screamed again and shoved Dean back to the ground.

_'Sorry sir…I really thought….'_ Dean stammered his eyes tracking his father warily as John stalked in front of him like a caged animal, scrubbing his hand over the day's old growth of beard.

_'No boy! You didn't think! That's the problem Dean, you NEVER think!' _John stopped directly in front of Dean and reached down, fisting his hand into Dean's soft blonde hair and nearly yanking it from his son's head as he hauled him to his feet and slammed him against the Impala; hard. Sam winced when he heard the audible crunch of the metal frame, simultaneously wondering if Dean had broken something as well. Dean's face twisted in pain as he dropped his left hand to the car for balance, he stared at the ground, he knew better than to look his father in the eye when he was this mad.

_'I'm sorry sir…I'll be better.' _ He said simply, the bruise on his face already starting to darken and the split in his chin dripping blood into the dusty ground beneath his shifting boots. The only thing that he'd ever wanted was for his father to think he was good enough…but apparently he needed to work harder to convince their father of his worth. _Since Sam had left, he was all the man had…and he was all that Dean had_. His thoughts were running unstopped through his head as he tried to put things into perspective.

John glared at him and simply wasn't willing or able to pull the last blow as his palm shot out and he slapped his son hard enough to spin the middle Winchester's face into the roof of the car. Dean grunted with pain as the ridge above his right eye smashed into the edge of the car and the immediate slash of hot liquid that began pouring down the right side of his face as a result_. 'You damn well better be! Why couldn't it have been you that left…why'd it have to be Sam?'_ John shot out angrily as he grabbed his bag and stomped away from his stunned son. Dean's eyes widened and he hung his head in shame combined with a weariness that he'd felt every day since his brother had walked out on him.

Sam's heart was breaking as he watched his brother stand _alone_ in the slowly fading orange light of the cooling evening sun, his eyebrow and chin still bleeding badly…his left arm curled into his side in a rare show of weakness. But it was his eyes that really tore at Sam's soul…the broken way he watched their father walk away from him…and then the slow inhale of breath as his older brother '_reset_' his defenses and completely covered the hurt and the pain at being so fully dismissed by his own father. Sam watched with a sinking heart as he saw the foundations for the '_great wall of Dean_' that were inevitably set in concrete that day. His brother had learned to protect himself by taking all the hurt, weakness, and the disappointment that other people saw in him and burying it so deeply inside himself that he would never be forced to deal with it…and that other people couldn't use it against him in the future.

But Sam had _never_ wanted to hurt his brother…he'd only wanted to escape this life and what it represented. It had already stolen their mother and injured the remaining members of the Winchester family in ways that couldn't be measured and that sure as hell couldn't be healed. He didn't want that for himself…he wanted a _normal_ life. Sam simply hadn't realized that by leaving that he was sentencing his brother to…_well…this._

Sam was surprised when he felt the cold splash of tears on his hand as he pressed his face to the window in despair. He wanted to go to Dean…but he couldn't leave this fucking room, suddenly the small room lit up in a blinding flash of white light and sent agony spiraling though his head as pain pierced his brain and forced the air from Sam's lung with its intensity. He felt his knees buckle and he slid to the ground, unable to stop the descent automatically bringing his palms up to his temples in an attempt to lessen the pain.

XXXX

Dean heard the mumbled words of pain; he couldn't understand them as he hauled his fuzzy brain back to the surface of his mind. He lifted his hands and ran them slowly across his face; the pinch of pain emanating from his chest reminding him instantly of the previous day's spectral activities. He groaned in pain as he tried to shift, his arm threatening to give way beneath him as he tried to roll his upper body toward the noise…it sounded familiar…and it was raising all his internal alarms…_Sam…_ His brain finally supplied. Dean pushed his sticky eyelids open at the sounds of his little brother in intense pain…not even being separated for the last four years or the horrendous realizations caused by the ghost of Dr. Ellicott could undo eighteen years of _listening_; of being fined tuned to Sam's needs and the sound of his voice. The big brother radar was still fully functional…and it was going into overdrive.

"Sammy?" he called out quietly as his eyes rolled around the darkened room. He reached over slowly and flipped on the light next to his bed and then twisted his head back toward his brother's bed. He squinted as his eyes adjusted to the light, he finally saw his brother's face…and it was pinched in pain as his hands clenched at his side…_almost like Sam was having a seizure_. "SAM!" Dean cried as he pushed himself onto the other side of the bed, his legs rolling over one another as he did. His chest was screaming at him in pain as he pulled his body toward the narrow opening between the two queen-sized beds. "Sam!... Come on Sasquatch…answer me!" he continued talking to his brother as he moved, once he'd reached the opening, he inhaled deeply and reached across the gap grasping onto the blankets that Sam was currently lying on top of…fully clothed, Dean noticed with dismay. He pulled his useless legs over the gap between their beds until he was laying on Sam's bed, he reached back and pulled his legs over and settled them next to Sam's, his brother was closer to the wall leaving space for him to sink into, _thank god._

He reached up and gently shook Sam praying that his little brother would wake up, his terror was amplified when he was able to feel that whatever Sam was suffering from…it _did_ feel a hell of a lot like a seizure. Sam's body was ridged and the veins in his neck were standing out in stark relief against his tanned skin. "Sammy…come on buddy…need you to wake up now…Sam!" he continued to talk as he shook Sam, reaching up and lightly slapping Sam on the cheek. He was winced when he saw the slight bruising on Sam's face where he'd hit him in the Asylum…_to keep his baby brother from killing him_. His mind shot back. Dean narrowed his eyes and pushed the pain of that thought to back of his mind and reached up to gently place his fingers on Sam's throat. He was relieved to feel the slightly faster than normal thrum of Sam's heart…it was strong…if faster than he'd like.

Suddenly Sam relaxed, his entire body sagged against Dean, his head lolling forward and dropping onto Dean's chest. Dean blew out a breath that he hadn't even realized he'd been holding, memories of Sam as a kid had Dean reaching up and gently carding his fingers through his little brother's, far too long, brunette hair. He whispered into Sam's forehead as he continued to try and soothe his brother. "Sam….come on man….need you to wake up now…you're scaring me Sammy…" he finished in a whisper, his own heart picking up speed the longer his brother was unconscious.

Dean had never seen Sam have a reaction like that before; he hoped to god that it didn't have anything to do with that damn '_ghost-whammy'_.

Dean didn't know how long they laid there; his fingers running absently through Sam's hair…it had to be the biggest _chick-flick_ moment they'd ever had…and his little brother had _slept_ through the whole damn thing. But finally he felt Sam shift against his chest, his head lifting slowly and his tired ocean colored eyes connecting with the intensely relieved and massively concerned green gaze of his older brother. "You with me now?" Dean asked as he pulled away so he could get a clearer view of Sam. He hadn't even noticed that Sam was lying on his injured chest…right where he'd been shot less than twenty four hours ago…._when his brother had tried to kill him._ His mind shot out again, he clamped the thought down and shoved it into the Pandora 's Box that held most of his 'feelings'.

Sam blinked a couple of times and then shifted to sit up; he was somewhat surprised to notice that they were in the same bed and that there was a distinct red stain on his brother's white bandages where _his _head had been resting. "Dean…you okay?" Sam asked as he reached out, intent on touching his brother, but pulling back at the last second when he saw Dean's eyes shift and his body tense automatically.

"I'm fine Sam…what the hell was that?" Dean asked he shifted his weight up so he was leaning against the headboard and had a better view of Sam's face; his anger taking the place of his fear as he stared at Sam, waiting for some sort of explanation.

Sam reached up and ran his hands over his face… "I'm not sure Dean…migraine?" he said, over the stampede of buffalo pounding around, unchecked, inside his skull and making him wince in pain.

Dean narrowed his eyes and looked intently at his little brother. "You get headaches like that a lot Sam?" he asked, suddenly very concerned that his brother had been keeping something important from him. "Sam, I'm supposed to take care of you…how can I do that if…"

Sam held his hand up in a defensive manner and sighed, his bangs falling into his tired eyes. "No Dean. I don't usually get migraines like this…and I haven't been keeping anything from you." _But you've been keeping stuff from me big brother._ He thought silently. Sam was surprised that his brother wasn't being snarky with him…which meant that he'd somehow managed to scare the shit out his sarcastic older brother…_well then that made two of them_…that had gotten more than they bargained for on this trip.

Dean reached over to the nightstand that stood between the beds, grabbing the little bottle of pain pills and popping the top, handing two of the small white pain pills to Sam. "Here, take these…they'll help." He said quietly. Dean tilted his head and then nodded as he saw Sam shift and lift himself wearily off the bed, heading into their small kitchen in search of one of the fancy little bottles of water that he drank, instead of good old fashioned tap water.

Dean watched his brother with the eyes of a hawk, he wanted to know everything that was going on with Sam…No…he _needed_ to know…he was already at a disadvantage with his injury…but he wouldn't let that get in the way of taking care of his little brother…_that was job one…Sam was job one._ They needed to find their father…although a part of him hoped that he never saw the bastard again…he knew that they needed whatever information he'd had on exactly what had gone down in that witch's den. Dean was more determined than ever to find the eldest Winchester and figure out how to fix this shitty situation.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _So the boys will be headed out towards a little town in Indiana, Burketsville…should be a 'fun town' Bobby will be tagging along on this hunt…for the sake of the storyline and then he'll be headed back to South Dakota and the boys will continue the search for John. I know some of you really don't like John and wonder why they're looking for him…well he has answers and the boys know that. Thanks to everyone that reviewed, several guests that I couldn't thank in PM's_ so _thank you__._

**Please Review: I really love to hear what you guys think.**


	6. Dreams or Visions

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only… **_**There is some language in this chapter...you've been warned.**_

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster... _**

**Chapter 6**

_Dreams or Visions_

Dean wasn't driving…and he absolutely hated that fact. It wasn't that he couldn't drive; it was that he simply couldn't focus long enough yet _to drive_. His vision would still blur on occasion due to the concussion he'd received, because of that damn ghost, and it was still having some effect on his ability focus for long periods of time. Sam was currently staring out the front window into the inky darkness, intent on keeping the car on the road through the heavy rain fall. Dean was staring out the passenger window, doing his best impression of a statue. He was concerned and trying to hide that fact from his little brother; Sam hadn't said much of anything since they'd left the motel earlier that day.

Bobby was following in his old truck about a mile behind them and that was one thing that Dean was intensely grateful for. He wasn't sure if the old hunter had said something to Sam while he'd been out of it…and if that was the reason why his brother was staring stonily at the white lines passing them on the road…or if Sam was killing himself internally for the things he'd said to Dean in that Asylum…either way…Dean didn't like the silence that was growing between them.

He reached over and pulled a soda out of the bag resting near his feet, sighing when he was forced to look at his long skinny legs. His jeans were so baggy around his thighs that it made him wonder if he should start buying smaller sizes. He really hated it when he actually _saw_ them…was forced to see his useless legs…most of the time he just focused on other things and ignore that he was literally _half-the-man _he should be…or at least that he used to be. He put his other hand on the seat and shifted his weight, causing his little brothers ever observant eyes to flicker in his direction. Sam furrowed his brow after watching him for a moment and then went back to staring out the window without commenting on Dean's movements. "Are we fighting right now?" Dean asked with a sigh, his voice rough and gravelly from disuse.

Sam glanced quickly in his direction, his face slightly confused. "What?" he asked.

"Are. We. Fighting. Right. Now?" Dean repeated slowly, his eyes watching his little brother as he tried to understand exactly _what _was going on between them. He knew that there were going to be problems for a while after the last hunt…but _damn-it_, he just wanted to forget that the whole thing had ever happened.

Sam huffed and shook his head 'no'. "No. I just don't have anything to say that you wanna hear." He said evenly, choosing to keep watching the road rather than looking over to see what his words had done to his big brother. Sam couldn't look at Dean without the memories of his most recent dream slamming in front of his eyes and forcing him to see his father beating his brother…and _damn are me and dad gonna one hell of a discussion about that shit._ He thought with rising anger.

Dean exhaled loudly and scrubbed his hand through his short blonde hair, his cheek was jumping due to how hard he was clenching his teeth. His fingers were drumming aimlessly on his knee as he shook his head in frustration. "You know what…whatever dude." He said and took a sip of the cola. He hated it when Sam got into these snippy types of moods, he never knew exactly what brought them on and the he sure as hell had never figured out how to pull Sam out of them. Ever since he'd been a kid…he'd dropped into these _funks_ and Dean had been helpless to pull him out of them…he'd always had to just wait them out…_wait for Sam to come to him_.

Sam's knuckles tightened on the steering wheel, but he refused to say what was really on his mind. He really wanted to talk about what had happened to Dean while he was away…but not in the car…not like this. Dean wasn't' likely to want to have _that particular_ conversation anyways, _not that his big brother ever wanted to talk about himself,_ and Sam still hadn't figured out how exactly to approach the sensitive subject.

Dean was staring out into the rain, classic rock playing quietly in the background, filling the interior of the Impala with the sounds of AC/DC, when a sudden pained gasp echoed through the car…and it had come from his little brother. The sound brought Dean's green eyes crashing back into the overly large form of his brother. Sam's hands had both abandoned the wheel and had gone automatically to his head; his eyes were clamped closed and the car was starting to veer dangerously on the rain slick highway. "Sam!" he cried as he immediately reached over to grab the wheel, luckily Sam's foot had slipped off the gas pedal so the car was rapidly slowing down as Dean steered it to the side of the highway. "Sam…come on man…what's going on? Sammy? Talk to me…" he continued the litany of questions as Sam groaned loudly and leaned his head into the steering wheel, his face a mask of pain. Dean was beyond scared now, he'd never seen Sam like this…the kid hardly even got sick…so _what was with these headache?_ He'd never seen one come on like this before and he sure as hell didn't know what to do about it. Once the car was completely stopped, Dean reached over and pushed the gear shift lever into 'park'. Only to have his brother suddenly moving aimlessly in the seat across from him.

Sam was shifting in his seat, his hands now clenching into his hair as he tried to fight through the blurring vision and the nausea that was starting to roll its way up his throat. "I'm gonna…" he said as he just barely managed to get the door open and slide out of the car to his knees, emptying the contents of his stomach on the side of the deserted highway.

"Sam…I don't know what's wrong…what the hell…" Dean watched as his brother slumped back against the car, his breathing coming in short little pants as he sat back onto the black pavement, soaking his jeans; his long hair now plastered to his head because of the intensity of the rain. "Sammy, come one man…get back in the car." Dean was frustrated and knew he couldn't reach his wheelchair; Sam had put the damn thing in the trunk…so he pulled his sore body across the bench seat until he could position himself behind Sam, allowing his little brother to rest back against his useless legs as he tried to gain control of himself. Dean rubbed slow circles on Sam's back and watched as Bobby's old truck came to a sudden stop just behind the Impala and the older hunter jumped out, jogging slowly to where they were both seated.

"What the hell happened?" he asked as he looked at Sam and then shifted his blue eyes back to Dean, who shrugged helplessly.

"I don't know Bobby…he was driving and then he suddenly grabbed his head and…this…happened." Dean said his voice full of worry as his hands gestured to the crumpled form of his brother; his eyes reflecting his increasing panic as they flickered between the two men.

XXXX

Sam was in a forest…well maybe not a forest but an orchard at least. There were trees everywhere, though they seemed to be planted with some sort of pattern in mind. He looked into the darkness as he heard the crunch of leaves behind him; and he could hear mumbled voices just ahead of where he was. He started to move in that direction, keeping his awareness of the sounds behind him as he did. When he came around the corner and finally spied the clearing, it was just in time to see a scarecrow crawl down off the cross that he'd been tied to and start stalking toward two figures tied beneath a tree. A man and a woman were seated on the forest floor, their hands tied above their heads…He couldn't quite make out their faces yet.

"I don't understand…their gonna kill us?" the woman asked, fear evident in her high pitched voice.

"Sacrifice us…which is…I don't know…classier." _That_ voice Sam would recognize anywhere…it was Dean and he was twisting his upper body trying to loosen the tight ropes wrapped around his wrists. His legs were shoved underneath him, in what Sam knew had to be an uncomfortable position. Although it wasn't like Dean could feel them to know that…but the damn things still needed blood supplied to them and based on their current twisted position…they sure as hell weren't getting any of that.

"So what's the plan?" the woman asked, her voice shaking slightly, as she looked hopefully at Dean, her face a mask of fear and confusion.

"I'm working in it." Dean answered quickly as he continued to struggle with the tight bonds. _Damn these hicks know how to tie a rope._ He thought in irritation.

She was silent for a moment, before she spoke up again. "You don't have a plan do you?" she asked in a defeated voice.

"I'm working on it!" Dean said loudly, his own voice laced with defeat as he realized that it was very likely that they were both gonna die at the hands of this scarecrow God…and his little brother was going to find his skinned corpse in the middle of this orchard. That thought made his chest hurt…the idea of Sammy finding his ruined body and having to deal with that.

"Dean?" Sam called out. But Dean didn't even acknowledge that he'd heard his brother…which meant that once again Sam was witnessing something that he couldn't interfere in…that he wasn't really a part of. He heard the leaves crackling beneath the feet of something quickly approaching the square. Sam turned away from his brother and looked pointedly into the darkness, looking for the owner of those footsteps.

Suddenly a massive form entered the square, it was dressed in old farm clothes, a leather jacket hanging from its massive shoulders and a sickle held menacingly in both hands. The face obscured by clothing wrapping around the head area. The skin on its arms was dried and readily showing the marks of needlework…where it looked as though the skin had been…sewn together. Sam inhaled sharply as he saw the thing approach Dean; the panic and fear that was clearly evident in his older brother's face making Sam sprint the few feet separating them as he tried to attack the creature. But his fingers slipped right through the form of the monster and Sam cried out in horror as the sickle descended on his older brother…

XXXX

"Dean!" Sam cried as tears sprang to his eyes and he dropped his head dejectedly into his hands. The sudden ache from the pain that was currently slashing through his head making it nearly impossible for him to control the emotional onslaught. "God no…." Sam mumbled, the tears running unchecked down his face as the dream or vision, or whatever the hell it was, faded away, leaving only devastation in its wake.

Dean watched as Sam slowly checked back in with reality, his brother was scaring the crap out of him at the moment. He reached down and gently turned Sam's chin in his direction, Dean was still seated behind his brother and his own hands were shaking with the adrenaline that was pumping through his system. "Sammy…you okay?" he whispered as he saw his brother wince in real pain.

Sam opened agonized blue-green eyes and looked up blearily into Dean's concerned face, weariness written in every line of his young visage… "Yeah…I think so…" he scrubbed his hand through his sopping hair and continued slowly. "It happened again, didn't it…?" He stated simply.

Dean bit his lip and his eyebrows rose and then crinkled before he answered. Bobby was staying wisely silent as he watched the brother's deal with whatever the hell this new _problem_ was. "Yeah…Sam…it happened again…what the hell is going on with you? You're having dreams when you're _awake_ now too?" Dean's voice was weary, but steady as he watched his questions cause Sam's face to pinch in confusion and slight irritation.

Sam started to shake his head and then thought better of it as his stomach started to rebel again. "I don't know Dean…" he said softly.

"When did this start happening?" Bobby asked as Dean stared at the top of his little brothers wet head. He looked up at the other man, his eyes now guarded as he tried to understand what Bobby had just said. "When did all this start Dean?" Bobby asked again quietly, his gaze shifting to the older Winchester brother.

Dean shook his head, "I don't know Bobby…first time I saw anything like this was in the motel the other day." Bobby nodded and looked back at Sam who was now sitting up a little straighter, breathing slowly and deliberately as he waited for the pain to start to dissipate.

"Bobby…can you help Sam into the car?" Dean asked. "We'll stop in the next town and get a room."

Bobby leaned in immediately gently grasping Sam's shoulders and helping the kid to his less than steady feet. "I gotcha Sam…come on." Bobby said as he helped the tall hunter to the other side of the car, reaching down and pulling the passenger door open. Sam folded his lengthy frame into the car and leaned back against the seat as he tried desperately to control his rolling stomach. "I'll be right behind you Dean." Bobby said before he gently closed the door.

Dean nodded his understanding and reached down to pull his legs into the car, placing them on the floor and reaching for the key. He listened as the Impala purred to life and he wished for about the millionth time that he could feel the rumble of her engine in his legs like he used to. He sighed and reached for electronic 'gas-pedal' and placed the car in drive, slowly pulling back out onto the wet highway. He glanced over at his little brother, who was now leaning heavily against the door, his hands over his eyes.

"Sam…what's going on with you lately?" he asked quietly. Dean couldn't help the wary quality that seeped into his voice as he hoped that his brother would answer him. Cuz this…whatever _this_ was…was really starting to scare him. Something was going with Sam and his little brother didn't seem too intent on talking about it.

Sam looked over at his brother slowly. "I told you Dean…I don't know what these headaches are…" He let the sentence die off and closed his eyes as he leaned back and he pointedly ignored the loud exhalation of air from the driver's seat. Dean turned his attention back to the road and turned at the light as a motel sign came into view. It wasn't anything fancy…although they never were…he rolled into the small parking lot and reached over to gently shake Sam, since he couldn't get out of the car without his chair…and Sam had to retrieve that. The fact that he was at the mercy of his younger brother grated on his nerves a little…but Dean swallowed his pride and asked anyways.

"Sammy?" he waited for his brother to roll tired eyes in his direction, suddenly noticing that they were stopped.

"Yeah?" He asked as he reached up and rubbed his eyes, trying to wake up his fuzzy mind.

Dean looked worriedly at his little brother. "I need my chair…." He said quietly as Sam's eyes widened in understanding and he immediately moved to open the door. Dean reached out and grasped his shoulder gently, "You okay?" he asked.

Sam nodded and turned a weary smile in his direction before climbing out of the Impala and making his way to the trunk, pulling out Dean's chair and unfolding it. He locked the little levers into place and rolled it around to the driver's side door. Dean had already pushed it open and was waiting, albeit not patiently, for his _ride._ Sam raised his eyebrows as he noticed the dark circles beneath his older brother's eyes and the pained expression as he grabbed the chair and levered himself into the seat carefully. Bobby pulled up right at that moment and placed the truck in park before climbing out and walking over to the young hunters.

"You two look like crap…" he stated as he stared at the brothers and smiled slightly at the 'bitch-face' Sam threw in his direction for the insult.

"You're not looking too hot yourself old man…" Dean stated quickly as he turned to roll to the office and check the room situation. The only real requirement that he had was that they were on the ground floor; a handicap room was a luxury he just couldn't afford…so he never even asked for them. Sam ran to catch up after glaring at the older hunter.

"Shut-up…I look great." Bobby quipped as he smiled at the two young men's backs.

Dean sighed as he pushed the door open surprised when it was suddenly pulled from his grasp and Sam reached over top of him to hold open the door. "I got it Sam." He bit out, more harshly than he'd intended. Sam mumbled something but continued to hold the door for his brother. "I'm not helpless ya know…just can't walk…" Dean mumbled as he rolled through and looked at the tall counter with dismay; he couldn't even see the motel owner on the other side. He hated it when this happened…when he was so totally _reminded_ of his disability.

Sam looked at his brother and reached up to run his long fingers through his hair as he saw the frustration spread across Dean's face and the immediate mask that slid into place when Dean realized that Sam was watching. He knew that Dean wouldn't appreciate him stepping in, so he stood near the door and watched as Dean rolled over to the tall counter and banged his fist on the front side. "What?" An annoyed voice called from a back room.

"A little service here." Dean called out. A face popped up over the counter and leaned down until the small man could see Dean sitting there.

"Yeah, yeah…sorry son…didn't see you down there." The man said and Sam inhaled sharply as he watched the vein on Dean's neck stick out as his irritation worsened. His hands were clenching into tight fists at his side as he closed his eyes and he pulled in a deep breath in an attempt to steady his rapidly rising temper.

"A room for the night…preferably one on the ground floor." Dean said crisply.

The little man smiled and looked at his book. "Sure…I can put you in room 7. One bed or two?"

Dean rolled his eyes…he hadn't missed the frustration that happened when people assumed that he and Sam were gay. "Two queens…one for me and one for my _brother._" Dean's voice was hard as ice and just about as cold too. Sam stood up and caught the attention of the owner as he realized that there was another person in the office…and this one was _tall and big._

They finished and headed back to the car, Dean was rolling along slowly as he tried to ignore the flashes of pain that were now slicing through his chest. He could feel the slight tickle as blood trickled from his chest wounds and soaked into his waistband. He sighed and leaned forward more so that Sam wouldn't see the red staining his lower abdomen. 'Damn-it!" he whispered. It appeared that he would be ruining another pair of pants due to that botched hunt.

"What was that Dean?" Sam called from the rear of the car.

"Nothing Sam." He shot back.

"Whatever…" Sam said just loud enough for Dean to hear. Dean just couldn't seem to do anything right. Every time he thought that they were getting better…he'd say something that pissed off his little brother.

Bobby had gotten the room next to theirs and was currently sitting at their table nursing a beer as he watched Sam pour over the computer screen. Dean was watching the creases in Sam's forehead increase at whatever it was that he was reading or due to the headache he was denying…Dean wasn't sure which. "So…every year a couple goes missing around here…it looks like the last couple went missing in April of last year. Always a man and a woman…always just passing through…like they are on some sort of cross country vacation or something."

"Like some sort of fertility rite?" Dean asked as he rolled over so he could see the screen. Sam nodded and turned the laptop so that Dean could read the story. "Huh…" Dean said quietly.

Bobby snorted… "Sounds like some sort of sacrifice…like to a god or something."

"We should check this out…since we're already here." Dean said, his gaze shifting over to Sam's incredulous face.

"No Dean…the last hunt wasn't exactly good for us…remember? We need to…" Sam bit his lip as he forced the next words out of his lips. "…to keep looking for dad." He said through clenched teeth.

Dean narrowed his eyes. "Yeah Sam…I remember…I was kinda on the receiving end of that…but that doesn't give us the right to just let these people die…" He said quickly and watched as his words settled into his brother's head. Sam closed his eyes and leaned his head against his hands as he tried to come to terms with the fact that they were going to get dropped into the middle of this hunt whether or not he wanted it. There was no way that Dean was going to let them walk away…

XXXX

"I don't need you to sign a permission slip for me Sam…I can take care of myself." Dean shot out as he slammed the door behind himself.

"You shouldn't have too..." Sam whispered as he heard the Impala fire up and the sound of gravel as his brother pulled out of the parking lot...leaving him to continue the research.

Sam groaned inwardly at his brother's unparalleled stupidity sometimes…he would never say it out-loud, but he sure as hell thought it often enough.

Dean had gone to this local restaurant, just on the outskirts of town over two hours ago to get some pie and talk to the locals…_apparently the town was famous for their apple pie_…but Sam hadn't heard from his older brother since then. Dean hadn't wanted company…he wanted to get away from Sam for just a little while…he needed to get control of his rampaging emotions.

And frankly, Sam really needed a few hours alone as well; he wasn't handling the dreams that he had been having too well. They all seemed to revolve around his brother being hurt…first by their father…and then by the scarecrow thing. He shuddered as the visual of the sickle descending quickly on his older brother's body flashed through his head.

He wasn't worried at first, he just figured that Dean was dealing with his shit the way he always did…alone. But then he'd tried to call and he'd just gotten the voice mail…and then Bobby had gone to the restaurant asking about Dean and the owner's said that they'd never seen a kid in a wheelchair come in…_so where the hell was his brother?_ It suddenly occurred to Sam that they had passed a large orchard near the edge of town and that if this town was a farming community…that they might just farm apples. And that would mean that…_Oh shit…_he thought as he started to connect the dots…

TBC…

**Author's Note****_:_**_ Once again the hunt will change so that it accommodates Dean's physical limitations and the addition of Bobby. No offense meant to anyone that loves that episode and hates it when author's change them… the boys are going to continue to find clues as to the where abouts of their father along the way._

**Please Review: It helps me push the stories forward if I know people are waiting for them.**


	7. I Think I Hate Apple Pie

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: So I know there's interest_**

**Chapter 7**

_I Think I Hate Apple Pie_

Dean couldn't remember exactly what'd happened. One minute he was sitting in the café, talking to a cute blonde waitress and the next thing he knew his head was killing him and he was trying to focus around the pain that was jolting through his skull. He shifted his upper body and immediately noticed that his hands were tightly bound above his head and he was seated on the drying leaves in some sort of forest. There were no birds or any of the normal sounds that should be present in a wooded area…it was eerily silent with the exception of mumbled voices. He heard the movements and the stifled voices of other people as they talked amongst themselves.

"He's not exactly _healthy_, think the God will care about that? I mean we've never offered up someone with such a broken body before. " a man's voice asked, it was deep and scratchy…like he was a smoker, or used to be.

Dean cringed as he heard them describe him in such a callous and accurate manner…It never failed to amaze him that he was affected by what other people thought of his disability. Oh, he would deny it all the way to his grave if asked...but he hated being judged for his inability to walk.

"That God don't care what type of health they're in as long as it's a young man and a young woman." A woman answered quickly.

Dean tried to shift his head so that he could see the people that were talking, it was late afternoon and he knew that Sam and Bobby were gonna be worried about him. He'd left earlier that morning and the fact that he had no idea how long he'd been unconscious worried him. Sam wasn't exactly in any condition to be hunting much of anything at the moment. His worry for his little brother was increasing exponentially as he realized that Sam was going to come after him…and Sam was probably going to find the skinned remains of his corpse out here in a damn apple orchard.

He sighed when he realized that he wasn't going to be able to undo the…_Damn…these hicks really know how to tie a knot…_ropes. He could feel the rough fibers cutting into the tender flesh of his wrists and the slightly warm feeling as blood seeped from them. His chest was burning as his rib protested the current position of his upper body and the wounds on his sternum stretched painfully and the scabs ripped open. Dean made the instant decision that if he somehow made it out of this mess…he wasn't eating apple pie…ever again.

"Uncle Harley…?" a girl's voice asked softly. Dean threw his eyes in the direction of the other voice. He was surprised to see the waitress tied to another tree about three feet from his.

"I'm sorry…but the town has to be saved…and there's just no one else. I wish it didn't have to be you…" the older man's voice said quietly.

"So what…we're gonna be the fertilizer for your damn apples?" Dean shot out flippantly.

"You brought this on yourself boy…if you hadn't scared that couple away this afternoon, it would have been them." The woman said angrily as she looked sadly at the girl.

"How many people have you killed?" Dean asked angrily.

"We don't kill them." The sheriff said as he stepped into Dean's line of sight.

"No…but you sure clean up the mess don't you. How many clothes have you buried…or cars have you hid…?" Dean was getting angrier the more he listened to these jackasses try and justify killing innocent people for the sake of their damn town. "I hope your apple pie is worth it!" he yelled after the group as they walked away.

"They're gonna kill us?" She asked quietly.

Dean huffed. "Sacrifice us…which is…I don't know…classier." He looked over at her petrified face and instantly regretted the sarcastic answer.

"So what's the plan?" The girl asked quietly as he shifted around and looked for anyone or anything to help get them out of this situation.

"I'm working on it." Dean said quickly as he continued to struggle with the bonds. He looked down and saw that his legs were twisted under him in such a weird position…and he knew…he just knew that if he could feel the damn things they would be screaming in pain at the awkward positioning. He looked around…hopeful that maybe they'd left his wheelchair somewhere nearby. It wasn't going to do him any good to get loose if he couldn't actually _get away_. His heart sank and he groaned when he didn't see the metallic object anywhere around.

XXXX

Sam was scared…they'd gone to the café and it'd been closed for the day. The Impala was still parked out front, but there was no sign of his brother. And the more he thought about that dream, the less he thought it was really a dream…he was starting to think that it hadn't ever been a dream; but a _vision._ For some reason he was having _visions_ that involved his big brother…and if he didn't find Dean quickly…the bloody wreck that had been his brother's body quickly flashed in front of his eyes and he had to stop and collect himself before moving forward again. His knees were threatening to collapse and his stomach was rebelling loudly at the brutal images being replayed with perfect clarity inside his head.

"Sam? You okay boy?" Bobby asked as he saw the far off look and the pain that flashed through Sam's eyes. He reached over and gently laid one hand on Sam's broad shoulder and was surprised to feel the quivers that were running unchecked through the young hunter's body.

Sam brought up glassy blue-green eyes and looked into the grizzled face of the older man… "I think I knew this was going to happen." He stumbled over the words as he tried to put some order to the images crashing through his head.

"Come again?" Bobby said as he narrowed his eyes and stepped so that he was in front of Sam, both hands now resting on the taller kid's shoulders.

"Earlier…in the car….I saw this Bobby." He said quietly.

Bobby stayed quiet waiting for him to continue. Sam finally looked up and met the confused and worried eyes of the other man. "I think it was a vision…not a dream." He whispered.

Bobby's eyes widened at that. "A vision?"

"Yeah…I've been having dreams…at least I thought they were dreams…but they always involve Dean in one way or another…and he's always hurt somehow." Sam inhaled a shaky breath before finishing this line of thought. "In this one…he…he…he…d…died." Sam finally managed to squeak out past the lump forming in his throat.

"He died?" Bobby questioned as he clamped down on Sam's shoulder, almost painfully as he tried to wrap his head around this idea. He knew that he was just repeating what the kid was saying…but damn-it, he was having a hard time with this.

Sam simply nodded and then closed his eyes as they filled with water. He couldn't deal with this right now…he had to save Dean. So he took a deep breath and reached up to scrub the tears from his eyes, "There was a forest…or an orchard. Dean was there with a girl…we gotta get there quick. Because that thing will be after them as soon as the sun drops." Sam's eyes shifted to the rapidly darkening skyline and he groaned at the limited time they had to get to the orchard and search the acres and acres of land for his immobile brother. He knew they would be in a clearing and he also knew that the monster would be there moments after the sun set. He reached out and grabbed Bobby's sleeve, pulling the older man toward the Impala.

"We gotta go now. It happened just after sunset." Sam said by way of explanation as he pulled open the driver's door and pushed Bobby toward the front of the car, obviously intent on him getting in the passenger seat.

"What will be there? What exactly happened Sam?" Bobby asked as he tried to get the maximum amount of information out of the frazzled young man. If they were going to go up against whatever this was…they needed information.

Sam looked over at Bobby as he drove, he tried to separate himself from the images and pull out the pertinent information. "I think it was a God of some kind…it was possessing the body of a massive scarecrow. I got there just as the thing crawled down off its cross and then approached Dean and the girl…it…k…killed Dean first…" His voice broke at the last part of the account. Bobby nodded but continued to watch the youngest Winchester as he struggled through the emotions raging inside of himself.

"Okay…so we know we're dealing with a God…probably a fertility God. So we need to find whatever its bound itself to and burn it….probably a really old tree." Bobby was spit-balling here as he tried to think of all the possibilities.

Sam looked over at him, his expression stunned as he watched the old man work through the limited information and come up with some pretty decent conclusions. "Okay…but first we gotta find Dean."

"Agreed." Bobby said evenly.

They pulled into an outlet near the orchard; Sam was watching the last of the sun's golden ray's slip below the horizon as his fear started notching up. He ran to the trunk and pulled out the salt gun along with any other weapon that he thought might at least slow the bastard down. He also pulled out the small butane flame thrower, since they were going to need to be able to torch the 'first tree' if they came across it.

He took off at a run, not bothering to wait for the slower old man as he sprinted into the rapidly darkening forest. He slowed once he was inside the cover of the canopy of trees and it became more difficult to see. He wouldn't do his brother any good if he tripped and knocked himself loopy or worse broke an ankle or something accidentally. He moved with the grace of one who had spent years perfecting the technique. Both he and Dean had spent their youth's learning to move quickly, while making the minimal amount of noise possible. It was one of the many many training sessions that their father drilled into them…that was before Sam started fighting the man tooth and nail…and apparently before he started beating the shit out his eldest son. At least Sam prayed that hadn't been going on beneath his oblivious nose. Cuz that thought hurt a lot worse than knowing that it had happened while he was away...if he'd missed those _signs_, then he was truly a shitty brother indeed.

He heard something up ahead and he stopped to listen, he knew that Bobby was circling in from the other side…but that wasn't what this sound was.

"You don't have a plan do you?" a female voice asked sharply.

"I'm working on it!" Dean's voice answered quickly. Sam felt the air whoosh from his lungs as he was instantly transported into the vision…everything was happening exactly as it had…and he hadn't been able to save his brother….Sam shook himself out of the self-imposed shock and ran forward.

He rounded the corner just in time to see the scarecrow marching purposefully toward his brother. Sam brought up the rock salt gun and shot directly into the center of the massive moving form. He watched with satisfaction as it fell backward to earth unmoving. He ran to his brother and pulled out the knife he'd had in his belt. "I take back everything I ever said Sammy…I'm so glad to see you." Dean said. The humor mixing oddly with the fear rampaging through his system. "How'd you get here?"

"Found the Impala…Bobby's here too." Sam said quickly, keeping one eye on the still unmoving form of the God. Once he had Dean untied, he turned and rushed to the girl slicing easily through her ropes. She scrambled to her feet and stumbled slightly as the blood rushed back into her numb legs. Sam turned back toward where Dean was still seated, his brother was shifting his skinny legs out from beneath himself, his green eyes warily watching the slowly moving form of the scarecrow. The thing was starting to get up. Deans eyes widened as he looked over at Sam and the girl and then back at the god…

"SAM! RUN!" he cried out. Dean knew that _he_ couldn't escape. But he'd be damned if he was going to be the _cause _ of his little brother's death. He was swinging his arms wildly at his little brother, Sam was simply shaking his head in confusion. _Did Dean really think that he would just leave him there to die? What the hell kind of brother did he think Sam was?_

Sam was just turning toward the advancing form of the scarecrow when he felt a massive hand slam into his chest throwing him up and into the air. He felt his back impact heavily against a tree and all the air in his lungs was forced out, as his body reacted to the unexpected impact. Dean watched with horror as the monster hit Sam so hard it lifted him into the air and he landed on the outstretched arm of an apple tree. He'd dropped the flame thrower as he'd untied Dean…Dean grabbed the small canister and then flipped his body over so that he was doing what could have been a version of the _'army-crawl'_ his chest flat against the floor of the forest and his arms hauling his body forward. The god had shifted its attention back to Dean and it was stalking toward the injured hunter. He caught sight of the girl huddled next to the unconscious form of his little brother. She was watching the whole scene with frozen panicked eyes.

Dean hauled himself several feet, he could feel that the scab's on his chest had been completely ripped off and that his rib was now starting to shift painfully. _Okay so it had been broken…and not just bruised._ He thought slightly bemused. He felt the scarecrow quickly closing the distance between them, he stopped suddenly and reached into his pocket, pulling the small silver lighter from the material. He flicked it open and lit the wick on the butane flame thrower. He then inhaled deeply and flipped his body over again, so that he was staring straight at the advancing form of the God and depressed the trigger; watching with intense satisfaction as the thing burst into flames and stumbled away from where he was currently lying. He looked over his shoulder and noticed that the tree off to his right had a band of engravings marked deeply into the dark bark. Dean turned the butane flame thrower toward the tree and pressed the trigger again and watched as the flames engulfed the trunk of the sacred tree.

Immediately he was forced to drop the canister as a high pitched screech resounded inside his head…he wondered if it was just so loud that it sounded that way…either way…pain slashed through his skull and his hands slammed into his ears in an effort to quiet the intense pitch. He could feel his eyes reacting to the severity of the noise and the trickle of blood that started to run from both ears as he tried desperately to stop the sounds. He felt his grasp on consciousness slipping as he rolled to his back and curled into himself as best he could. Suddenly the encroaching darkness pulled him unwillingly into her grasp…the screeching finally stopping as he lost consciousness.

TBC…

**Author's Note: ** _I will post the next chapter quickly…I know cliff hangers suck…I hate them too. But next chapter shifts the story and needed to be its own start to a new adventure. _

**Please Review: If you like the story, please take time to review it. Thanks**


	8. The Truth about Dean

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: So I know there's interest_**

**Chapter 8**

_The Truth about Dean_

Sam came back to consciousness with a painful gasp of air as he twisted and felt what was sure to be a mass of bruises twinging painfully on his upper back. "Dean?" he called out quickly, before his vision had even cleared. He felt a hesitant hand settle on his shoulder, Sam pulled his blurry eyes around and connected them with a very scared looking young woman, who was _staring_ at _him_ with concern. The fact that his brother wasn't answering any of his verbal calls had immediately raised his super-sensitive-sibling early warning system, and that had him sitting up rather quickly. "Dean!" he called out again…louder this time, his gaze sweeping the immediate area and finally slowly slipping across the silent and much too still form of his older brother. The air froze in his lungs as he looked the blood leaking slowly from both of Dean's ears. Sam scrambled to his feet…stumbling the few remaining steps that still separated him and older his brother…his knees giving out at the last moment and causing him to fall beside his brother's silent body.

Sam felt the tears starting to burn behind his eyes as they slowly blurred his vision and he reached two fingers out to gently touch his brother's neck. His fingers searching for Dean's pulse…he couldn't stop them from shaking as he prayed silently that his brother hadn't fulfilled his vision. He nearly collapsed with relief when he felt the thread-like pulse beating sluggishly beneath the surface of the white freckled skin. It wasn't as strong as he'd like…but his brother was alive…and thankfully all of his skin was still attached to his body.

"Dean?" Sam tried again. He gently shook the silent form again and was gratified to hear a pained moaned that escaped Dean's lips as his eyes fluttered open revealing confused emerald green eyes. "Oh thank God." Sam whispered. He reached up and carded his fingers through Dean's short blonde hair…his brother just continued to stare at him…but there was still no comprehension in those eyes…nothing that showed that he'd actually _heard _what Sam had said. Dean's pale face was becoming quickly confused as he stared up at his little brother…almost like he couldn't understand what Sam was saying.

Dean narrowed his eyes and shifted his body and then let out a groan of pain as his rib shifted and agony shot through his chest. He leaned into Sam's comforting hands and closed his eyes…but he still had yet to say anything. It took Dean a moment to realize that he couldn't actually hear…he couldn't hear anything…not the sounds of the forest around him…and especially…not Sammy, who was seated directly above him wearing his patented _worried-about-Dean_ expression.

He could see his brother's lips moving but he couldn't hear a damn thing…_what the hell had happened to him?_ Dean blinked owlishly up at Sam as he tried to pull his fractured thoughts together…he remembered the scarecrow…and he remembered the _sound_…and that was the last thing he'd heard.

"Dean? Can you…hear me?" Sam asked slowly as he watched the confusion being reflected out of the deep green eyes of his big brother. "Oh my God…" Sam breathed as he sat back on his heels and allowed his gaze to shift out into the forest_. Like they needed any more things going wrong with their lives…like Dean needed anything else wrong with him_. He wondered suddenly if it was permanent…he prayed to a god he wasn't even sure he still believed in that it wasn't.

Dean furrowed his brow and then looked away as pain flared in his chest, Sam's eyes were drawn down to his brothers body…the red that stained his t-shirt making Sam wince. He knew that this was a direct result of the hunt at the Asylum…the injuries that were splashing across Dean's body…they had started with him. He pushed the rising guilt down as he tried to figure out how to get Dean out of the middle of this forest.

"Sam?" Bobby called as he ran into the clearing…the sight of the young hunter kneeling over the bloody form of his brother made him stop dead in his tracks. He closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath, before he advanced on the Winchesters. "Is he…" Bobby couldn't quite finish the sentence.

Sam glanced up and shook his head. "No…but I…Bobby, I don't think he can hear me…" he said quietly. His eyes were drawn back to Dean's face…his brother reached up and ran his hand along Sam's chin as he looked sadly at the bruise forming on his little brother's face.

"Sammy…" he whispered.

Just the sound of his brother's gravelly voice saying his name made Sam want to cringe. He just wanted things to be the way they had been when they were kids…when Dean was still his hero and he was still the _know-it-all_ little brother. "You're gonna be okay Dean…I'm gonna make sure that you're okay." Sam said as he looked down into the soft hooded eyes of his best friend…and more importantly…his brother. All his life Dean had never once let him down…not even the night he'd left for Stanford…Sam had known that his brother fought with their father that night…and he knew that _he'd_ been that cause of that particularly violent fight. A small masochistic part of him wondered if that was when all the physical abuse perpetrated against his brother had started…the night he walked out...without a backward glance.

XXXX

Dean crawled back toward consciousness slowly…his chest was still painful, though not as painful as it had been. His head felt like a twelve piece band was giving an encore performance and the normal low-level noises that should be present were still maddeningly silent in his ears. He pushed himself up slowly and leaned against the headboard…Sam's worried face immediately popping into view. His lips were moving, but Dean couldn't hear anything that he was saying. He held up his hand to his ear, it was weird to talk and not hear his own voice…so he tried to stay silent.

Sam's eyes widened as his suspicions were confirmed….Dean couldn't hear him. His eyes slid shut and he scrubbed his hand across his face in frustration. He was so tired of the Winchester brother's being on the end of some shitty cosmic joke…_because honestly_...he really wasn't getting the punchline.

Dean inhaled slowly, his eyes squeezing shut as the rib twitched and he decided that he wouldn't be taking any more deep breaths any time in the near future. "Sammy…It'll be okay." He said…_yeah he really didn't like not hearing his voice…it was just too damn weird._

Sam narrowed his eyes and sat on the edge of the bed, grabbing the motel stationary and writing a quick message to his brother. '_I think we need to take you to a doctor.'_ Sam had written in the neat capital letters that his little brother had always written in.

"No Sam…I think the _sound_ just damaged my eardrums…give it a couple of days and then we can discuss it." Dean said quickly as he put his hand on the notepad and gently lowered Sam's note back to the bed. Sam's patented _'puppy-dog'_ face was currenlty plastering itself all over his little brother's concerned face.

He wanted to argue with Dean…but he was hopeful that his older brother was right…because the last thing that either of them could really handle at the moment was hearing that not only was Dean in a wheelchair…but that he was also deaf. Sam looked down and then nodded slowly as he brought his eyes back up and looked into his brother's pleading gaze. Dean smiled slightly as he saw the acceptance sink into Sam's posture, he reached up and pushed at Sam's chin, the same way that he had when they'd been kids and he was trying to tell Sam to '_keep-his-chin-up_'.

Sam lifted his tired frame off his brother's bed and walked over to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and a little bottle of aspirin; he opened it and poured out three of the little white pills. Dean's sharp eyes watched as his little brother took the pain meds…he furrowed his eyebrows in concern.

Dean reached over and pulled his wheelchair next to the bed, he hauled his sore body over and settled it into the chair. He rolled over to where their bags were situated, grabbing his duffel and moving to the bathroom. He really needed a shower, Sam's eyes were tracking his movements…as he pushed the door to the small room open…he sighed when he realized that this was one of the motels that only had a shower. He'd have to make do…_he always did._

XXXX

The first thing that Dean noticed when he woke up the next morning was the quiet snores of his little brother…_oh thank God…_ he thought as he realized that his hearing was slowly coming back. That would make his brother happy…not that he wasn't happy about _not_ being saddled with _another_ disability.

He debated on crawling out of the warm bed and rolling over to the coffee machine…when he heard the soft buzzing of his cell phone on the wooden end table; he reached for it, albeit a little slowly, in an attempt to keep the little device from waking up his still sleeping brother. Dean clicked the little silver device open and was surprised when a set of coordinates popped up…they were from an unknown number. But that was tactic that he'd definitely seen before…one that his father would use when he took longer on a hunt than he'd anticipated. That meant that his father was trying to send them somewhere…_what if he knows that Sammy's back with me…_ that thought send ice racing through his veins. The last thing that Dean wanted was for Sam and their father meet…not at this point. Sam was still too angry…in general…and their father…well, when wasn't the man angry?Although a part of him knew that he would go...and that Sam would go too.

Dean just wasn't willing to risk that either Sam would leave as a result of another fight with the old man or that….he would finally realize that there wasn't anything anyone could do for Dean. He hoped like hell that there was …but he was a Winchester after all…and they didn't exactly have _good luck._

"Who was it?" A raspy and sleep thickened voice asked from the other bed.

Dean's eyes shifted up to meet Sam's as his brother immediately noticed that Dean had _heard_ his question. "You heard me?" he asked again, his eyes shining and a slow smile spreading across his lips as the deep dimples that Dean teased him about were slowly making themselves known. It was the first time that Dean had seen those 'cheek-pits' since they left the Asylum and he'd missed his little brothers smile…more than he'd thought. Sam was suddenly shifting his legs out of the bed and stepping over the narrow gap between their beds so that he could sink down on Dean's still warm mattress. His ocean colored eyes were hopeful as he watched a small smile slip across his brother's chapped lips and a slow nod. "Thank God." Sam breathed as he leaned in and pulled his brother into a hug, then slowly releasing his now squirming older brother. "And you need to drink more water dude." Sam shot out. He watched as his brother raised his right eyebrow at the jibe and the tilt of his head as he debated firing back at Sam. Instead he did the one thing that Sam hadn't expected…he let it go.

Dean allowed the chick-flick moment; he reached up and wrapped his own arms around his brother's broad shoulders, allowing himself to just feel the steady beat of his little brother's heart. "I'm okay Sammy…" he said softly. "I'm harder to break than they think…"

Sam leaned away again so that he could clearly see into Dean's deep green eyes…he _knew _that last part was true…if what had happened to him over the last couple of years hadn't broken his brother…Sam kinda doubted if there was anything that could.

"So who was on the phone?" he asked again as he pulled away, thumping Dean lightly on the back as he did, shifting his weight to stand up and turning to walk to the little coffee maker these crappy motels always seemed to have. He placed the grounds into the machine and began pouring the water into the holding tank. Sam's eyes were shifting to his brother's guarded face…whoever had been on the phone…they had caused Dean to through his wall back up. He flipped the button and then rounded on Dean, looking for an answer to his question.

Dean was leaning heavily against the wall at the head of his bed, his head resting on the nasty flowery wallpaper. "There wasn't anybody on the phone…it was a text." He said simply.

Sam raised an eyebrow at him and folded his arms across his chest as he sat on the end of the bed again. Dean always wondered how it was that someone as _big_ as his little brother managed to fold themselves into such twisted positions without breaking something. He rolled his eyes as Sam's eyebrows rose as he waited for Dean to continue. "It was coordinates."

Sam's arms flew to his side as he lifted himself up and he shifted closer to Dean. "Like coordinates from dad…coordinates?" he asked incredulously. Dean nodded and Sam's fingers were suddenly moving through his hair in frustration, the long strands falling waywardly into his eyes as his breathing increased.

Dean's eyes dropped closed and he waited as the fall out of what was soon to be a _full-out Sammy-storm_ picked up power, going from a 1 to a 10 in no time flat. _This wasn't going to be a fun conversation_, "And let me guess…you want us to go _to_ wherever these coordinates are…right?"

Dean tiled his head to the side and slowly crossed his own arms across his chest in increasing irritation as he watched Sam's immediate refusal… "Sam…it might be where dad is right now…I have to find the man." Dean said quietly, he knew that Sam understood that, but he wondered if Sam got just _how_ important it was for him to _know,_ know for certain whether or not this _situation_ was permanent.

Sam hated this, he absolutely hated this. He didn't want to put Dean in the same state as that man…let alone follow a lead that their _father _had sent them. Sam didn't trust the man…_he'd _lost that right the first time he hit Dean to alleviate his own anger or guilt or whatever the hell the man would use an excuse to beat the shit out of his eldest son. But he also knew that Dean was right…they needed to find the man…it might be Dean's only shot at healing his back. He was clenching his jaw so tightly that his cheek was jumping with the strain and the cords on his neck were standing out against his tanned skin.

"Sam, calm down." Dean said quietly. He was watching Sam go into what he used to call '_the bad place_'. Sam's angry eyes shot back to his and Dean exhaled loudly as he reached up and ran his fingers through his hair. "Look Sam…" His brother cut him off with a look. Now Dean was starting to get angry, he felt the bubbling emotion running up his throat along with a comment that he knew he shouldn't voice…but he did anyways. "Look Sam, I'm going…now you can either come along or not…but either way…I'm leaving in one hour. So you'll either have your ass in the car…or find another method of transportation." Dean's face was set in a stony mask as he watched his words slash into Sam. His brother's eyebrows came together and he shook his head as 'bitch-face' number six made an appearance. He'd gone for giving them numbers when they were younger…mostly because Sam had so many versions of the Sam Winchester patented 'bitch-face'.

Sam couldn't believe that his brother could be that stupid…that he would willingly fall back into the same traps that had landed him in that damn chair. "Dean, don't be stupid…" he said without thinking. When he saw the subtle shift in his older brother's face, the hurt that flashed through his green eyes, Sam was immediately sorry that he hadn't shut-up while he'd been ahead. _So much for the hug…_he thought.

Dean couldn't believe that his little brother had just called _him _stupid. He'd always known that Sam was the smarter of the two of them…but to have that so blatantly thrown at him…_well it hurt_. He clenched his jaw and schooled his face into a mask of indifference. "If that's how you feel then maybe we should just go separate directions." Dean said evenly, the only evidence of his true feelings the white knuckles that were clenching the blanket pooled around his hips.

Sam groaned and then scrubbed his hand down his face in frustration. "No Dean…that's not what I meant. I didn't mean…"

Dean cut him off. "Yes you did." He said coldly.

Anger and regret were still flashing through Sam's blue-green gaze as he continued to stare at his older brother. "Fine. Where are _we_ going?" He said through gritted teeth.

"If you're gonna be bitchy the whole…" Dean started and Sam his brother cut off with a pointed look.

"Stop. I'm not leaving you, so….quit trying to force me to." Sam forced out tiredly as he sank into one of the rickety chairs near the coffee maker. He watched as Dean inhaled angrily, his eyes flashing dangerously as he finally nodded, effectively ending this argument until a later time. Sam wanted to tell Dean about the visions of his father…the visions of John beating him…but he knew that Dean wouldn't exactly be receptive…and when that subject did come up…Sam was going to _make damn sure that _Dean talked to him.

Sam stood up suddenly and then grabbed his toiletries bag, along with some clean clothes and headed into the tiny bathroom. He didn't say anything to Dean as he closed the door behind himself. His gaze fell on the shower and it suddenly occurred to him to wonder how the hell his brother had managed a _shower?_ He shook his head and glanced into the mirror. Sam sighed as he saw the nice purple bruise on his jaw…_damn scarecrow._ He thought as he pulled his shirt over his head and stripped off his pants, reaching in and turning on the water. Most of the time they stayed in these hotels they got rooms with miniscule water heaters…he hoped like hell that this wasn't one of those rooms.

He crawled into the small shower and was grateful when hot water cascaded over his sore muscles. He glanced down at his chest and groaned when he saw the multi-colored bruise that was center mass on his sternum. He definitely hadn't missed this…he hadn't missed getting injured…watching Dean get injured…

A sudden flash of pain nearly brought him to his knees as his vision blurred in and out, "Ah…god…" he rasped as his head felt like a lumberjack was splitting it open with the biggest damn mal that ever existed.

XXXX

Dean was stomping through the snow covered wooded area, his face a mask of concern as he followed their father. He was freezing, it was January and he was in the middle of the Bitterroot Mountain range outside of Missoula. They'd been tracking this coven for that last several weeks and the clues had finally led them deep into the frozen tundra of the Montana mountains.

Sam was once again only able to watch as his brother followed their father deeper and deeper into the dark thick forest. He wasn't exactly sure where they were, but he was certain that he didn't want to _see_ whatever this was. Every time so far…every single one…these _visions_ had led to more questions and to an ever increasing load of guilt.

He watched as Dean stepped in a hole that had been hidden beneath and icy layer of snow and his brother felt the bones in his ankle twist painfully, Dean went down on one knee with a whispered groan of pain. His father glanced back over his shoulder and then stalked back to where Dean was trying to pull himself slowly back to his feet. The knee of his jeans now ripped and covered in rapidly melting snow. "What the hell Dean! Can't you even walk properly?" his father shouted at him as his fingers fisted into Dean's hair and hauled him painfully to his feet. Dean bit back a cry as his ankle took the brunt of his weight and it settled onto the icy ground. His face was pinched as he tried desperately to ignore the flashes of agony that were twisting up his nervous system via his leg. "Get it together Dean!" His father whisper-shouted at him.

Sam couldn't believe it…is this what t had been like for his brother? Constantly being told that he wasn't good enough…_damn-it_…Dean was one of the best hunters that Sam had ever seen. He had an innate ability to successfully do this job. But their father seemed to be constantly throwing his _very few_ mistakes back in his face. Sam could feel the anger building in his chest as he watched their father stride away from Dean…leaving his injured brother to limp along at a far faster pace than he should have been able maintain.

Dean bit his lip as he mumbled. "Yes sir." He stepped down onto the twisted right ankle and accidentally bit through his lip, blood now coating his inner lower lip as he pushed the pain down and limped after his father. They approached an old cabin…it looked like something out of a horror movie…and had Dean twisting his fingers into his jeans in concern as he looked at the dilapidated old cabin. His green eyes flickered to his father, who was now crouching behind an old wood pile, his shot gun already in hand. He glared back at Dean, causing the middle Winchester to sink slowly to his knees beside the angry man.

"You better not have screwed this up too, Dean." His father whispered angrily at his eldest son.

Sam was starting to see red; the more he watched his father subtly…or not so subtly as it turned out…degrade Dean for trying to help, and it didn't help that Sam knew what the outcome of this particular hunt was going to be... He wished that he could smack that angry smirk right off his father's face. But he was destined to only watch as his father and brother moved quietly toward the back door. His father was just opening the cracked wooden door when the lights inside the place flared to life…catching both Winchesters off guard. Dean's eyes widened as no less than seven witches were standing lined up on the other side of that damn door. The leader appeared to be a tall thin man with greying hair and strange blue eyes. He narrowed his icy blue gaze before speaking… "Well well well…if it isn't John Winchester and his shadow…nice of you to make it John." He finished snidely.

Dean's eyes popped open even wider as the witch called his father by name…as far as he knew; they'd never had a run in with this particular coven before…now he was rethinking that assumption. _Cuz, you know what they say about people that assume…they make and ass out of u and me…_the adage rolled through his head as he watched the interaction between hunter and witch….or warlock…_whatever they call themselves. _

Sam watched as one of the witch's threw some sort of spell at John, his father was trapped against the wall of the cabin. "Dad!" Dean called as he rushed forward only to be hit from behind by an eighth witch that they'd missed. The woman stared at the blood that rushed from the head wound where she'd bashed the young hunter with the handle of broom…cuz that was a particularly nice piece of irony…a witch hitting someone with a broom. Sam's horror only built as he watched two of the warlocks step forward and haul his unconscious brother to his feet and throw him into a corner, face down. The sound of Dean's face slamming into the wooden floor boards made Sam's own twitch with sympathy. He knew that that had to hurt…if Dean had been conscious that is.

"So John…you made it…and you brought the shadow too. Where's the other one?" the warlock asked as he stepped up in front of the hunter.

John's voice dropped as he answered. "You said that you would leave him alone if I did this…" he said through clenched teeth.

The blue-eyed man raised his eyebrows in contemplation and then tilted his head as a slow smile curved his thin lips. "I did say that…didn't I? But you see here's the thing…this one doesn't have the same potential as the other one…"

John's face fell as he looked at the other man. His mind obviously sifting through information that he hadn't felt he needed to share with his hunting partner…i.e. his son. Sam was still trying to place exactly who they were talking about when he saw his father's visage change completely. "You can't have Sam." He said slowly. The warlock tilted his head and then burst out laughing as the others joined into the cacophony of snickers rattling around inside the room.

"Well…I suppose I only need the energy from one of them…and I'm guessing that you're willing to sacrifice this one…instead of me going after the other one…" he pointed to where Dean's crumpled form laid in the corner. The man inhaled deeply and made a sound that was almost like it was _hurting him_ to have to make this concession. "I suppose I will leave little Sammy alone…" He walked over to where Dean was splayed out on the dirty floor and reached down, his fingers elongating into what looked like razor sharp talons, as he pulled up Dean's leather jacket and the numerous shirts his brother always wore. His ice blue eyes flickered back up to John and he smiled evilly as his stabbed his pointed nails right into Dean's lower spine…an eerie blue glow emanating from where they were now deeply inserted inside of Dean.

Sam wanted to stop the man…it was obvious that this is what had injured Dean…and it had _never_ been his fault. Their father had led him out there like a sacrificial lamb and offered him up to these bastards. He launched himself at the witch only to have his fingers once again slash through the form of the man. He was unable to affect any change, he felt the tears start to burn as he watched the witch _pull something_ from Dean…something that was uniquely Dean's and absorb the energy. Dean's face pinched with agony, even in the depths of unconsciousness he was in obvious pain, as the fingers penetrated five distinct places on his lower back.

Their father watched everything with guarded eyes and if Sam didn't know better he would say that John almost looked guilty…gutless and guilty.

XXXX

Sam found himself kneeling in the now ice cold water of the shower, he could hear Dean pounding on the door. "Sam, if you don't answer me in two seconds I'm breaking this door down!" Sam tried to understand just what his brother was saying as he attempted to control the white flashes of agony searing through his head. "I mean it Sam…it's gonna go down…" He heard Dean shifting on the other side of the door.

"Dean…just give me a minute….damn-it." He called in response. Sam's voice was weak and raspy as he tried to verbally stop his brother from doing damage to the motel. Because even though Dean was relegated to a wheelchair…he had no doubt that he both _could and_ _would_ break the flimsy bathroom door in an attempt to get to Sam.

He heard the slight hesitation as Dean finally got an answer from his little brother. "Hurry up you fricken girl!" Dean called out in irritation as he rolled away from the door.

Sam reached up and turned the water off as he sat back on his heels for a moment trying to sift through the images that he'd seen. So it was now obvious that their father had been involved…that he'd screwed up…somehow…and then offered up Dean as a payment for his error. But apparently it had been between him and his older brother…and _oh my God did that just drive the guilt-soaked-knife so much deeper into his soul._ This was something that he would have to tell Dean about…but how did he even bring this type of thing up?

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _As I said the hunt was going to take a turn…the boy's will have a reason to search for John now…beyond trying to heal Dean. They need to know just what happened to Dean and how they find this coven to try and reverse the damage. They will also continue to hunt along the way…Sam will have to figure out to tell Dean what he knows and Dean will have to learn how to let his brother help._

**Please Review: Please take the time to let me know what you guys think of the chapter…**


	9. The Truth about Sam

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster...obviously. Because these chapters are nearly falling out of my head.  
_**

**Chapter 9**

_The Truth about Sam_

Dean kept glancing over at his little brother's strangely silent form. It wasn't like he could ignore the giant ball of angst that emanated from the passenger's seat. Sam was making a point not to look at Dean and when he did his eyes would get glassy and he'd return to staring out the window. They'd tracked down where the coordinates were located; it was a small town in northern Oregon. So they had a good two days of driving…although if Dean could figure out how to make that time shorter he would. This stoic and silent version of his normally talkative brother really sucked to travel with. Bobby had headed back to South Dakota; he'd left a hunt unfinished to rush to their aid. He'd told the brother's to call him if anything popped up that looked like it had to do with their father. Dean had snorted at that. He knew that their current destination was definitely from their father and that there was at least a small chance that he'd be on the other end of this little side trip. He looked over at Sam again; he was trying to figure out what the hell had happened in that bathroom.

Sam had been in there for almost an hour, and although Dean liked to tease Sam about being a girl…truth was that Sam took very fast showers, in order to preserve water and avoid the wrath of his older brother. That lesson had been pounded into him from a very early age…_Dean had made sure of that. _ But this morning had been different; something about the eerie silence on the other side of that closed door had scared Dean. He could hear the sound of the water pouring down, but he hadn't been able to get Sam's attention for more than twenty minutes…and that was _after_ he'd started pounding on the door. With the events of the last several weeks, Dean wasn't willing to take a chance where Sam was concerned. He still wasn't convinced that there wasn't something supernatural wrong with his brother. Sam had been too easily distracted lately, he been having those damn headaches…the ones that he wouldn't talk about afterwards. He would just stare off into space and occasionally throw a set of haunted eyes in Dean's direction.

But this time had been different, when Sam had finally emerged from the small room; his eyes were red-rimmed and shiny…like he'd been crying. He'd immediately grabbed his duffel and shoved his stuff into it…Sam had never said another word after exiting the motel. He just continued to stare out the window and scare the crap out of his older brother with his new _Helen Keller_ impression. Dean inhaled and then regretted the action when his rib protested the deep breath…his groan of pain brought Sam's eyes flickering in his direction.

"Want me to drive?" Sam asked evenly. His voice not reflecting the enormous raging pool of emotions that was rolling around inside his head.

Dean looked over at him as thought he'd grown two heads. "Since when has pain ever stopped me from driving?" he asked flippantly.

Sam just nodded and returned to looking out the window. "No Sam. Stop. What's going on with you man?" Dean said as he pulled the car over toward the side of the road. He was done ignoring this strange behavior. Something had happened to Sam and he wanted to know what…and he wanted to know _right-the-hell_ now.

Sam just shook his head and turned away from Dean.

Dean reached out and grabbed Sam's bicep, pulling his larger brother toward him. "Not good enough little brother…what's happening with you? You've been weird ever since we left the motel…well truthfully, you've always been weird…but now it's getting really noticeable." He said angrily as he tried to look past Sam's defenses. Sam pulled his arm out of Dean's grasp and huffed as he opened the door and got out of the car, walking several feet in front of them. He knew that Dean couldn't follow him…_damn Sammy and his 'I'll just put _this_ in the trunk for you'_…help with the wheelchair.

"Real mature Sam!" he called out the window. Sam turned back toward the car and simply stared at his brother with stunned eyes. He wasn't even angry…he was just…numb. Dean narrowed his eyes as he watched the odd behavior…

Sam just shook his head and sank down onto the gravel of the borrow pit, his head dropping into his hands as he tried to figure out if this was the time…_was this the time to tell Dean what he knew…?_ Would Dean even believe him? And if he did believe Sam, how were they going to track down that random coven and get them to reverse whatever deal their father had made. It was too much…it was all too much.

"Sam…please come back." Dean asked quietly. He was leaning half-way out of the window as he watched with brotherly concern etched into his very skin. Whatever _this_ was…Sam needed to talk to him about it, because this was really starting to kick off the internal-big-brother-alarms. His baby brother lifted haunted eyes and looked into Dean's face…he finally nodded and climbed back to his feet and then crawled back into the passenger seat. Sam folded his long frame, appearing far smaller than his 6'4 body had any right to get.

The car, however, was never put into drive as Dean waited for Sam to start spilling…because they weren't moving a damn inch until he had a better idea what was up with his little brother. "What the hell was that Sam?" Dean's voice was soft but edged with contained frustration as he stared pointedly at Sam.

Sam sighed and scrubbed his hand through his hair, the lengthy locks falling over his eyes. "Did it never occur to you to wonder how I knew where you were the other day?" he asked, his eyes never leaving the dashboard. Dean shifted in the other seat as he reflected on his rescue…or as he liked to remember it, _him saving Sam's ass in the end_…now that he looked back at it…it was a little odd that Sam and Bobby had known exactly where he and the waitress were at in that big-ass orchard.

Dean scrunched his face, his green eyes narrowing as he attempted to understand exactly what his brother was getting at here. "You said you found the Impala…" he shrugged. "You're pretty smart Sam…I figured that you just put the pieces together….came up with the right answers to the final Jeopardy question." His eyes flickered up to Sam's face, searching his brother for something that would explain this weird ass conversation that they were having. "Is that _not_ what happened Sam?"

Sam blew out a loud breath and then finally turned so that he was facing Dean, his blue-green eyes shifting uncomfortably as he decided to forge ahead…he knew that Dean needed to know about the visions…but he really didn't want his older brother looking at him like he was freak. "I saw it…" he said softly. "I saw the whole bloody thing…in the orchard with the scarecrow…only it had a much different ending…a much bloodier ending." His voice broke and he stopped talking, his eyes dropping to his hands where they rested in his lap.

Dean's eyes widened in confusion. "What do mean 'you saw it'?" he asked. "Like '_you see dead people'_ saw it?" It wasn't that far out of the realm of possibility, they'd met a lot of people that had _weird abilities_ over the years. But the idea of Sam being one of _those_ people didn't sit too well. If there was any truth to this, then it would make Sam a potential target for both the supernatural and possibly for other hunters.

Sam shifted again; he was more uncomfortable in his seat waiting for Dean to respond than he'd ever been, like he was waiting to take a test he hadn't studied for. "Remember when I got the last headache…the one in the car…." He continued softly.

"I'm not sure I'll ever forget our unorthodox stop, Sam. I was worried that you were gonna crash my baby." Dean said, his voice slightly irritated as he was reminded of how close they'd come to doing real damage to the Impala. It wasn't that he was concerned about the car _at the time_…he'd been too scared about what was happening to Sam. But he'd be damned if he admitted that now.

Sam rolled his eyes and shot Dean 'bitch-face' number nine. "I saw you in the orchard Dean…I saw the townsfolk tie you up…I saw you struggle with the ropes and try to reassure that girl…I _watched as _the scarecrow peeled your skin from your bones okay!" Sam was shouting now, the tears were rolling unchecked down his pale face and his breathing was starting to come in rapid pants as he tried to maintain control over himself. But just talking about this was flashing the gruesome images in front of his eyes…and seeing Dean getting his skin ripped off by a maniac God was not even close to Sam's idea of _pleasant._

Dean's mouth fell open in a small 'o' and his eyes widened even further as he watched his little brother have the equivalent of an emotional breakdown. He reached out and grabbed Sam's arm gently, trying to get Sam's attention. "Sammy breathe man…you gotta slow down and breathe…" he said as he tried to break through whatever visual memories were surging through Sam at the moment. After what seemed like forever, Sam finally gained control of his breathing again. "Okay Sam…so this is freaking me out here…you _saw me_? As in…you had some sort of vision?"

"Yeah…at least I think so." Sam answered quietly, his voice worn from the emotional battle raging inside him at the moment.

Dean twisted his head from side to side as he mulled over the information…that couldn't be a good thing. His little brother seeing things that involve him…or maybe there had been other people involved too? "Is this only time you've had one involving me?" he asked slowly. He was thinking back to the last scenario involving these nasty little _headaches_. Sam looked up at him through the long fringe of his bangs and slowly shook his head 'no'.

Dean exhaled loudly and dropped his hand back to his side, before looking directly at Sam. "Okay…what else have you seen Sam?" Dean wasn't really sure that he wanted and answer to this question. Sam's face pinched in real pain as his breathing picked up its pace again.

"Sam calm down…" Dean said and narrowed his eyes as he realized something horrific… "This wasn't the only one…with me…was it?"

Sam's watery eyes crashed into Dean's worried gaze and he shook his head again, leaning forward and placing his head in his hands and resting his elbows on his knees. He felt Dean's hand hesitantly touch his back…and then start to move in small circles. It was comforting…the feeling of his brother's hand against his tense muscles. "Tell me….Sam…" he said quietly.

Sam inhaled and nodded slowly as he leaned back against the seat and shifted his position so that he was looking in Dean's direction. "I'm not sure how much is real and how much is my head trying to make sense of this…crap." He said as he looked back out the window again.

"Sam…stop stalling." Dean said. He knew this was something his little brother did when he didn't want to have a conversation. He'd dance around the subject until he was finally forced into it.

"I saw you and…dad." He finally said. Dean continued to stare at him without comprehending where this was going. He shrugged his shoulders and waited for Sam to continue.

"And…"

"I saw that bastard…beat you into the ground…alright! I saw him hit you until you physically couldn't get up anymore. I saw him haul you out on a hunt and then serve you up to a bunch of witches like some sacrificial victim. I saw everything Dean…" Sam choked out as the tears slid silently down his face and he turned to look Dean full in the face. He saw the shock and the shame wash across his brother's visage as he realized that Sam knew…_damn-it…Sam knew everything_.

His mouth opened and closed several times as Dean tried to respond…he wanted to deny it. Deny that his father had beat him on so many occasions after Sam left, that he wasn't sure which scars were from hunting and which scars were from his father. But he sure as hell didn't want to talk about this with Sam…that much he knew._ Wait…what? Did Sam say something about those witch's… _He swallowed loudly and latched onto the only piece of information that he _would_ talk about with Sam. "The witches? The ones in Montana?" he asked, his mask sliding into place with an almost physical effort as he shut down the parts that would have opened up to Sam.

"After all that I just said…the only part you wanna know about is the witches?" Sam asked, shaking his head in frustration as he watched the 'wall' slide into place as all emotion was wiped from his brother's stoic face. "Dean…dad…"

Dean cut him off, anger seeping into his voice. "No Sam. We are not talking about that. Nothing happened, so let it go."

Sam was starting to get angry now. "You can't lie to me Dean. I _saw_ it."

Dean turned away from his brother, his anger being fueled by his humiliation and shame that Sam had seen him…seen him at some of his lowest and weakest moments. But it didn't mean that he had to relive them by talking about it. "I'm not talking about that…you said you _saw_ the witches?" he tried again to reroute the conversation.

Sam pulled in a frustrated shaky breath and conceded to his brother's wishes. He had known that Dean wasn't going to want to talk about this. He had known that it was a long shot that his stubborn older brother would ever allow him to carry any of the baggage that he hauled around with him on a daily basis. _No wonder his back was broken…_But that didn't make the brush-off any less painful…a small part of Sam had hoped that maybe this would bring them closer…not drive another wedge between them. He could see now, looking at Dean, that he'd been naïve in hoping for that.

"Yes. Alright. Yes. I saw the cabin in Montana…I saw the 8 witches that were inside…" Dean's eyes were getting wider and wider as Sam described with perfect clarity the situation he'd found himself in more than a year ago. "It was snowing…you twisted your ankle…but dad forced you keep moving toward the cabin…where they were waiting for you. They knew dad by name…and they called you 'his shadow'."

Dean's heart was speeding up incrementally as he heard the accurate account of that hunt coming from someone that hadn't been there…which meant…that Sam was _seeing_ things he shouldn't be. And that also meant that he had probably seen their father doing…_no he was not going there._ His green eyes were wide as watched Sam continue the story.

"They attacked you from behind, after spell-locking dad. A witch with a broom, she knocked you out…then the tall one with blue eyes, he shoved his razor sharp nails into your lower back and pulled _something_ from you….before you ask I don't know what it was…but at least now we know your injury can be fixed…that it _is_ supernatural." Sam finished quietly. He hazarded a glance in Dean's direction and he was surprised when he saw the water building in Dean's green eyes as he stared straight out the front window. Sam reached out and gently touched his elbow, only to have Dean pull it violently away.

Dean couldn't believe it…he couldn't believe this…his father had _hauled him_ out there, told him that this hunt was vitally important. He'd made Dean do research on it for two weeks prior to heading out toward that cabin. He'd thought that they were going after a nest of Vampires…not witches.

"Dean don't you get it…dad took you out there to get them off his cowardly tail…he traded you for himself…" Sam whispered. He was dying a little bit inside as he watched his words shatter his brother's composure and he physically crumbled in front of Sam's eyes. His body slumping as he rested against the door, as far from Sam as he could get within the confines of the car. His shoulders were shaking and the tears were rolling down is face steadily as he tried to understand. He really was trying…there had to be a reason why his father would do that. Surely their dad didn't hate him _that_ much…did he?

"Dean…" Sam said as he watched the emotional equivalent of a tornado tear through Dean's broken body. "We will find that coven…and dad…and we _will_ fix this." He whispered. Sam had no intention of telling Dean that it had come down to a choice…a choice between him and his brother. Because he knew that Dean would have made the same choice if it meant saving him.

Dean closed his eyes and reached up to wipe the tears from his eyes…what Sam had just broken inside his heart…it couldn't be _fixed…_not with magic or anything else on this god forsaken planet. But he could protect Sam from the backlash…his inhaled and slammed his emotional wall into place…cutting off all emotion as he started the car and pulled back out onto the highway.

TBC…

**Author's Note****_: _**_ Brotherly angst galore in this chapter…sorry. But at least now they have a reason to find both their father and the coven. As I said before they'll be checking in on other hunts as they continue the cross-country search for John. They'll run into other hunters, and make friends and enemies along the way. So hang in there…_

**Please Review: The story is just picking up steam and I enjoy hearing what you guys think about it.**


	10. Is it a Hunt or a Clue

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster...obviously. Because these chapters are nearly falling out of my head. Thank you to any 'guest reviewers' since I can't PM you guys...  
_**

**Chapter 10**

_Is it A Hunt or a Clue_

Sam pulled into a small motel in northern Idaho, they had about another 7 hours of driving, Dean was already asleep in the passenger seat and he was having a hard time keeping his eyes open at this point. His brother hadn't said much of anything to him after Sam had let the proverbial '_cat out of the bag_' a that stop on the side of the road. Sam had known that telling Dean would probably mean that he'd be getting the silent treatment for a while. But he hadn't anticipated the complete lack of emotional response once the initial shock had worn off at least not on the part of his brother. After the initial waterworks…there'd been _nothing_. Dean had simply shut down. He would talk about the drive and where they wanted to stop for lunch…but nothing personal...not a damn thought that might even be perceived as personal. He didn't seem to want to discuss the Montana hunt anymore and he definitely didn't want to talk about their father. Sam pulled in a deep breath and looked over at Dean's sleeping form. He shook his head silently and pushed his long hair out of his eyes as he climbed out of the Impala with a sigh, walking into the small office.

A young man sat behind the counter, his feet resting on something below the desk. He was reading a comic book, 'X-Men;, _it looked like._..the kid glanced up and smiled half-heartedly at Sam. "Need a room?" he said as he set the comic down and clicked something on the computer in front of him.

"Uh yeah…ground floor and two beds please." Sam said automatically. The kid raised his eyebrows at Sam and shrugged his shoulders. "I got two beds…but they're only on the second floor. There's a soccer competition in town…so rooms are a little sparse. I got a ground floor with a king bed?" the kid said as an afterthought.

Sam groaned and then wondered which choice would piss off Dean less…the king sized bed…or him having to carry Dean up the stairs. "You don't have an elevator do you?" Sam asked hopefully.

The kid gave him a funny look and then shook his head. "Nope."

Sam closed his eyes in frustration…just one more thing to add to his growing pile of things that were pissing off his brother anyways. "Ground floor...king." He finally said. Sam exchanged the money and took the key from the kid. "Thanks…" he said through gritted teeth.

The kid just waved as he walked out of the office. Sam slid back into the driver's seat and pulled the car around to room 21. Once the car was turned off and he'd pulled Dean's chair from the trunk, he opened the passenger, startling Dean awake. His brother came up with fists flying, his knuckles connecting with Sam's jaw before Sam could move out of the way. "Damn-it Dean…" he grumbled as Dean's eyes widened in realization that he'd just decked Sam in the mouth.

"Oh shit…Sam…sorry man." He said quickly as his eyes focused on his little brother standing there holding his jaw gingerly. "We here already?"

Sam rolled his eyes, "No but we're stopping for the night. I already paid for the room." He finished as Dean's eyes panned the surrounding area.

"Ground floor?" Dean asked.

"Obviously." Sam retorted. He rolled Dean's chair in front of him and watched while Dean struggled to pull his tired body into the chair. He would have offered to help, but he figured at this point his older brother probably didn't want his help with much of anything. He inhaled and then told Dean the _rest of the story_… "There's only one bed though…king sized."

Dean's eyes popped open even wider and he searched for a comeback. "Sam, you'd fill up a king sized bed all by yourself…where am I supposed to sleep?"

"Ha ha, Dean. It was all they had available on the ground floor. So unless you'd prefer me carrying your ass 'bridal-style' across the second floor threshold…this will have to do." Dean was actually impressed with Sam's snarky remark. He smiled and shrugged…

"You know I don't swing that way…I prefer blondes…" he finished with a smirk. Dean was still angry or embarrassed, _he wasn't sure which_, by what had transpired in the car earlier…which ever it was…but he could push that down so that he could deal with his brother when needed. Besides as hard as that subject had been for him…and it had_ really _sucked…he knew that it couldn't have been any easier on Sam. So while he wasn't ready to talk about any of that shit yet…he was going to try and work around it, so that they could hunt down these witches and get his legs functioning as god intended and with less tire treads...

Sam shot 'bitch-face' number three at him as he grabbed their duffels from the trunk and walked to the room. Dean rolled across the gravel, his arms straining as his wheels caught on the uneven terrain. He watched as his little brother opened the door and stepped inside, his huge frame disappearing into the darkness, before the room was flooded with light as Sam turned on the lamps near the large bed. Dean huffed as he finally made it to the room, he rolled inside immediately noticing that there was a small kitchenette area and the place had wi-fi and pay-per-view..._Nice touch..._ He moved to the bathroom and was grateful to see that at least this place had a normal bath tub…which would make getting cleaned up a lot easier for him.

He turned and rolled back to the bed, claiming the side closest to the door…because some things weren't going to change…if anything wanted to get to Sam…it would have to go through him first. Dean wondered if Sam even noticed that he still did this. Claimed the spot nearest the door…when they'd been young that had been a necessity because of Sammy's age. While their sizes may have reversed, the fact that Sam was still the _younger_ brother never would. He grabbed his duffel from where Sam had set them on the end of the bed, "I'm taking a shower Sam." He said quickly as he headed for the bathroom and hopefully nice hot water.

Sam just nodded and waved Dean off as he sank onto the bed and pulled out his laptop. Might as well find out more about this place in Oregon.

XXXX

Dean was still toweling off his hair as he rolled out of the bathroom, he glanced around until he saw Sam sitting at the table staring blank faced at the computer screen. Something about the look on his face made Dean stop and watch for a moment before slowly pushing himself over to his brother.

"Unless you're watching Asian cartoon porn…you're paying way too much attention to that screen." Dean said with a slight laugh. Sam's eyes slid up to meet his and his eyebrows shot into his hairline as gave Dean 'the look'. It wasn't quite a bitch-face, but it wasn't too far off either.

"I'm trying to figure out why we're being sent to Oregon jackass. And you're the one with the unhealthy obsession with cartoon porn…not me." Sam finished as he looked back at the screen.

Dean chose to ignore that last comment, since technically it _was_ true, "So what are we up against Watson…?" He asked as he moved the small fridge and grabbed a beer. He was intensely grateful that Sam wasn't asking about their earlier conversation. There was a part of him that hoped that his brother would just let that go…forever would ideal…but just letting it go for now…would work. It looked as though luck seemed to be on his side. His geek brother was intent on whatever he was reading.

"So I think there's a hunt in Oregon." He never looked up, so Dean rolled so he could read the screen too.

"Okay…4 missing kids in the last two weeks, always taken from the….really? Taken from the same park? You'd think that parents would take their kids somewhere else after the first one." Dean said as he took a swig of his beer. He closed his eyes and smiled as the cold liquid swirled down is throat, man did he love beer. He felt Sam smack his arm to get his attention back, "What?"

"Pay attention. So yeah…taken from the same park…no signs of struggle. The parents said that they were just there one minute and gone the next." Sam furrowed his eyebrows and sat back slightly in the chair as he contemplated what kind of monster this might be. He saw something shift in Dean's face out of the corner of his eye, just before Dean was backing up and rolling over to where his duffel back was at. He pulled the green bag open and pulled out a book…but not just any book. _Son-of-a-bitch…_ Sam thought in irritation as he recognized his father's journal. "How'd you get that?" Sam asked, his tone shifting immediately to clipped and angry.

Dean's green eyes shot up to his and he shrugged. "Dad left it in the car the night he disappeared." He left it at that, since he really didn't want to open an avenue for Sam to start questioning him about_ that night_ again. He flipped through the pages after rolling back to the table, he finally stopped about half way through the book. "Damn-it…" he muttered, his eyes narrowing dangerously.

"Wanna share with the class? Or do I have to guess?" Sam asked. The irritation warring with curiosity as he watched Dean.

Dean finally looked up at him and then handed him the journal. "I think it's a Raw-head." He watched as Sam started to read about the nasty creature. They took children and kept them alive for days before feeding on them, stealing the kids youth and leaving them a crippled version of themselves. The kids generally died within a couple of days after being recovered…if they got recovered in the first place. It was one of the creatures that Dean hated the most, not his _most_ hated monster…but a pretty close second. That shining title was a toss-up between demons and the Striga's.

Sam's eyes widened as he read what the kid's went through and then on how to kill the Raw-head…electricity. For whatever reason their bodies couldn't dissipate electrical shock. Sam inhaled deeply and tossed the journal onto the table near the computer, he ran his fingers through his hair as he shook his head. This was something that he'd been afraid of…their father sending them on _hunts_…and then both of them being both unwilling and unable to simply walk away and actually look for the man. And now that they knew that there were children in danger, he knew that neither he nor Dean would walk…_or roll…_away from this one. "So we're definitely going to Oregon?" Sam asked, resignation strong in his deep smooth voice.

Dean's face looked irritated as he glanced up at Sam. "Obviously…we're not gonna let those kids just die because I wanna walk again…" Although his face was scrunched with agitation, Dean's voice was even and steady as he confirmed what Sam had already known…Dean would never put his needs above those of the innocents,_ and they didn't come more innocent that little kids,_ that they were supposed to save. And while he appreciated his brother's intense sense of duty…he was worried that their father was intentionally trying to throw them off his trail. There was also the possibility that the trail that _would_ lead to either John or the witches was growing even colder the longer they circled around the states…._saving people…hunting things._

"Dean…" Sam didn't even get to finish the sentence before his brother was cutting him.

"No Sam…we go to Oregon and we kill that son of a bitch…and then we'll keep looking for dad." Dean was glaring at him, his eyes hard and determined… Sam rolled his eyes and nodded slightly as he pushed down his desire to keep searching. Dean saw it…the moment when he his brother crawled on board with him…they were gonna take out this asshat.

XXXX

Sam couldn't believe it…this hunt hadn't gone the way he'd figured it would…not one little bit. Dean was in the house, where they'd found the raw-head and the two missing kids. Dean was standing guard at the top of the stairs, the rain was pouring outside…and inside…the roof had so many holes in it that there was standing water everywhere. Dean had yelled at him to get the two kids out of the house and he had done it…

Dean could smell the rotten stench that always accompanied these particular monsters…now that he thought about it…most of the monsters they hunted smelled pretty fricken awful. But these…they smelled like a combination of rancid milk and rotten meat, and it was making his gag reflex work overtime to avoid puking all over the rotted boards that constituted the floor. He heard it before he saw it, the raw-head was moving rapidly up the stairs. The twisted face of the monster with the peeling skin and the intense red eyes stomped into view and crashed into him, knocking him to the floor. _Why was it that all the monsters wanted to knock him out of his chair…assholes._ He thought as the thing started to climb back to its feet. Dean's eyes widened as he took in the sheer size of this particular monster. Usually they weren't quite this _big._ "Son of a bitch…" he said loudly as he scrambled to reach the taser that'd been knocked out of his hand when the damn thing ran into him.

It growled at him and then started in his direction, a wobbly stumbling gate but still rapidly closing the gap between them, his fingers finally closing around the cool metal of the gun, he pulled it up and aimed at the monster, depressing the trigger simultaneously. He watched the electrodes impale themselves into the things chest and it stiffened as more than 100,000 volts rocketed through its body. And then suddenly Dean's entire body was just as rigid as the monsters as he barely realized his mistake before he collapsed. He'd fired the taser while he and the raw-head were connected…by a large puddle of water that had formed on the old floor due to the rain. He felt his heart seize with the electricity as his brain effectively shut itself down…

Sam rushed back into the house as soon as the kids were seated inside the Impala. "Dean!" he called as he ran through the front door again. When he didn't get an immediate answer from his brother, he called out again, pushing his rain soaked hair out his eyes as he scanned the dimly lit room. His eyes finally landing on a crumpled form…the raw-head. He stumbled forward and froze when he saw Dean's wheelchair overturned in the kitchen, near the staircase where his older brother had been on sentry duty. "DEAN!" he cried as his worried gaze finally made out the unconscious form of his older brother. He sank to his knees next to Dean, reaching out to check for a pulse. He was grateful to feel the thready light beats beneath his searching fingers. "Dean…come on man. Wake up." He said in a strained voice. Sam's fear for the life of his brother was increasing exponentially as he looked away for a moment and then saw the taser about two inches from Dean's outstretched hand. "Shit…" he muttered as he connected the dots…Dean was lying in a puddle of water with the raw-head less than six feet from him. They were connected by the puddle…meaning that his 'oh-so-smart' brother had accidentally electrocuted himself while taking out the monster. _Why does all this shit keep happening to you Dean... _He thought as he pulled his cell phone out and dialed a number that he didn't even need to look at his key pad for…he'd dialed it so many times over the years...

"911…What's your emergency…" a voice asked.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _This is following along with the series thus far, but I will be taking it in a different direction as it progresses. But just like in the series, Dean is taking the brunt of the hits right now…don't worry it will shift as they get closer to the witches…Sam's not safe either. They will find a clue at the end of this hunt though…that will lead them closer to finding either John or the witches._

**Please Review: I've been mapping this fiction out…and your reviews are spurring me onward. **


	11. Theres always a Catch

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

******_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster...obviously. Because these chapters are nearly falling out of my head. Thank you to any 'guest reviewers' since I can't PM you guys.._**

**Chapter 11 **

_There's always a Catch_

Sam waited for the doctor as he told the cops the story of how they'd found the kids and then of course how Dean had gotten 'electrocuted' when an old transformer had blown and he'd been too close. The men told him again how sorry they were that his brother had been hurt, but that it was good thing they'd been in the neighborhood and heard the kids screaming. He nodded and then his blue-green eyes flickered up as the doctor in charge of Dean's case motioned to him from the end of the long white hall. "Excuse me." Sam said as he turned from the officers and immediately headed toward the man, staring at a clip board…whatever he was looking at, he didn't like it.

"Mr. Birkowitz?" He asked.

Sam nodded, "Doc, how's my brother?" his eyes were begging the medical professional to give him some good news…but the man inhaled before launching into the prognoses for Dean. And that small intake of air nearly broke Sam's composure…he'd heard that before…it was the air that was needed to launch into a long detailed reason as to 'why' his brother wasn't okay.

"His heart…it was damaged…we can keep him comfortable. But I'm afraid there's nothing we can do. " The doctor looked honestly sorry as he gave Sam the devastating news. Sam couldn't breathe at first, his airway closed off and he just stared at the doctor, waiting for him to tell Sam that it wasn't true...that his older brother wasn't dying...that it was all some lame joke.

"How long?" Sam asked quietly. His heart was starting to stutter inside his chest at the thought of losing Dean…permanently.

The man shook his head. "A few weeks…a month at most….I'm truly am sorry. But we can't work miracles." And the worst thing was that Sam actually believed the man...he believed that the doctor was truly sorry for these two boys...that had saved innocent kids only to have their lives irrevocably changed as a result of that unselfish act. _Life really wasn't fair_...the man thought as he turned to leave.

Sam nodded and furrowed his eyebrow at the comment. The doctor walked away as Sam headed to his brother's room. When Sam rounded the corner, the first thing he noticed was that Dean looked like 'death warmed over' to be entirely honest…his brother looked like absolute crap. There were dark bruises beneath his eyes and his skin was extremely pale, making his freckles stand out in stark relief against the white pallor of his face. Dean's eyes flitted up and latched onto his little brother's worried blue-green gaze as he tried to smile slightly. He carefully set down the remote after flipping off the tv and glanced back to Sam's worried eyes.

"Have you even slept? You look worse than me." Dean said, the exhaustion that he was feeling evident in his voice...along with an increasing concern for his baby brother overall health.

"I talked to your doctor. They told me there's nothing they can do..." Sam said quietly. His body was hunched over and he looked far older than his 22 years, he was definitely carrying the weight of his brother's impending death like a ball and chain hanging from his shoulders and weighing him down.

"Yeah...I know...You ever actually watched daytime tv? That little fabric softener teddy bear…I swear I'm gonna hunt that little bitch down…" Dean was trying his best to make it normal between them...but he only seemed to be making it worse...if Sam's face was anything to judge by. Dean was breathing shallowly and his head was a bit fuzzy as he tried to ignore the pain radiating from his chest and focus on Sam.

"Dean…" Sam started but Dean held up a hand to stall off whatever comment Sam had been about to make, he tried to ignore the slight shake of the limb as he looked Sam square in the eye.

"Look, what can I say Sammy…it's a dangerous gig and I drew the short straw…at least this way we don't have to worry about my legs anymore…and you better take care of my car or I swear I'll haunt your ass." Dean was trying really hard to keep the exhaustion out of his voice as he teased his little brother. The same little brother that he was going to leave alone and unprotected really soon…and that thought actually hurt worse than knowing that he was going to die. He'd never wanted Sam to know what it was like to be truly alone...he would have done anything to protect Sam from that.

"I don't think that's funny." Sam said evenly. His face not even cracking a smile, everything in his little brother's stance was pained. Just being in the same room as all the devices that were monitoring his big brother's vitals was difficult. And every bit of his worry was emanating from him like pheromones...and there was not a god-damned thing that Dean could do to change that. So he did what he always did...he covered it with jokes.

"Oh come on…it's a little funny." Dean quipped. He was trying here…he really was. The last thing that he'd wanted was to leave Sam…and especially not like this. Not because of some botched hunt that neither of them could have prepared for. Of course if he was honest with himself...there was no way to prepare for losing your brother…Dean knew that if he lost Sam…well he probably wouldn't make it two days. But Sam was stronger than him…always had been. He'd never needed Dean the same way that Dean had needed him. Dean had talked their father into checking on Sam at Stanford a lot more than he would ever reveal to his brother…because that was his secret to keep…his weakness to bare. The knowledge that he _needed_ to know that Sam was out there somewhere…and that he was happy and healthy.

"No…it's not." Sam said as the anger started seeping into his voice at just how quickly Dean was willing to throw in the towel. Hell, they'd _just_ gotten back to together…they were just starting to be _brother's_ again. Sam wasn't ready to give that up, he wanted to know that Dean was back to normal and that he could have a quasi-normal life. Because at some point…Sam wanted the option to go back to school, but he couldn't do that until he knew that Dean was _whole_ again. Hell, he wouldn't even consider it until then.

"There's nothing I can say Sam…I'm gonna die and there's not a damn thing you can do about it." He watched the words slam into his little brother and the way that Sam's blue-green eyes narrowed in anguish, cut Dean deeply. He had wanted to try and sugar-coat it for Sam...make it easier somehow…but he just didn't have the energy. He was so tired, his eyelids wanted to slip closed and send him racing after the sandman…but the simple fact that Sam was standing there looking for all the world like Dean had just shot him in the _fucking heart_ made him keep his green eyes open.

"Watch me…" Sam said as he stared at his brother.

XXXX

Sam was sitting in the crappy little motel several hours later; he'd been trying to call any one of his father's friends for help. Anyone in the hunting community that might be able to help them…so far…nothing…nada…zilch. He sighed as he picked up his phone and dialed the one person that he didn't really want to give this news to.

"Hello?" Came Bobby's grizzled voice immediately, there was a slight pause on Sam's end and Bobby forged ahead in true Singer fashion, demanding information. "Sam…what's happened?"

Sam inhaled before launching into the tale of the raw-head…Bobby was quiet while Sam explained that the hunt that their father had sent them on had led to catastrophic medical problems for Dean. He didn't sugar coat what the doctor had told him, mostly because Bobby knew him well enough to see right through it. When he finally did finish he sank onto the bed and felt a kind of numbness seeping into his very bones. "Bobby…I don't know how to help him. I've called everyone…and no one has any clue how to help Dean."

"Why is it whenever you two get into anything you always wind up covered in muck?" Bobby shot out as he scrubbed his hand down his face and leaned back in his chair. He heard Sam's sharp intake of breath and he mentally kicked himself. "Look Sam, just go get that idget brother of yours out of there and then you two come see me…we'll figure this out, son." He needed these two idiot boys to understand that whenever they needed anything…time to heal or just a place to crash for the night…that they could and should come to him.

Sam agreed slowly and he was just hanging up when a soft knock on the door caught his attention. He looked down at their father's journal…the one he'd been searching for a solution in...a look of disgust working its way onto his face. Sam closed the book closed his eyes for a moment, taking in slow breath of air to steady his nerves before he slowly climbed to his feet and padded over to the green door. He nearly had a coronary when he saw his brother seated on the other side of the door. Dean looked tired, but not nearly as awful as when Sam had left him a couple of hours ago. "Dean!" he said loudly. "What are you doing here?" His brother was sitting in the chair looking like 'the-cat-that-ate-the-canary'. He was wearing one of Sam's grey hoodies, one that he'd apparently forgotten at the hospital…_he'd noticed that fun little fact when he got outside…where it was damn cold_…and his brother's expression was a bit sheepish as he tried to smile at Sam.

Dean managed to smile and not smirk at Sam as he rolled through the open door… "Checked myself out…" His brother immediately rolled to the bed nearest the door and pulled his tired body onto the mattress, positioning his legs and then pushing his wheelchair back a bit as he settled onto the flowered bedspread.

Sam was speechless…which was an accomplishment…because his little brother _always_ had something to say. Dean watched as the news of him checking himself out of the hospital resonated with Sam…his brother wasn't happy about it. His eyebrows were scrunched together and he was staring at Dean like he'd grown a second head or something.

"Alright look Sam…the doctor came in after you left he ran some additional tests, because my heart rate was elevated and the blood pressure spiked…but when he came back with the results…he was seriously confused, because the tests said that there was nothing wrong with me…He ran an EKG…three of them actually and there was no sign that my heart had ever been injured…not on any of those tests." Dean was still trying to wrap his own head around the doctors stunning news. All he'd known was that suddenly he'd felt _better_…the ache in his chest had receded and he was less tired after he'd woken up…his hands didn't have the blue tint of poor blood circulation anymore…and his breathing was so much easier. He'd known that something had happened…he just wasn't sure exactly what or when it had happened. But as soon as the doctor left his room, he'd been changing…intent on getting out of that place seriously fast…like '_toot-sweet_' fast…and he had. Grabbed a cab and wound up at the hotel where he knew Sam had gotten a room for the night. He was gratified to see that Sam had gotten two beds and a ground floor room...at least his little brother hadn't forgotten him so quickly.

"Are they sure? How is that even possible Dean…I mean I saw the scene…I _know_ you were electrocuted…" Sam said as he sank down on the bed next to Dean. Watching his brother with guarded eyes…he was wondering with this new-found vision thing of his…why the hell hadn't he seen any of this? Was it because Dean was going to be healed somehow…or did he only get flashes of possible futures? He didn't know and that was maddening.

Dean rolled his eyes and sighed…he would have to convince his brother that he _really_ was okay. He 'd figured that he would, because if the roles were reversed…well he wouldn't exactly be believing Sam easily either… "I brought the medical chart for you to look at yourself…_Dr. Winchester…_besides I wasn't gonna die in a hospital where the nurses aren't even hot." That garnered him 'bitch-face' number five...which was Dean's all-time favorite 'bitch-face'.

Sam grabbed the paperwork from Dean's hands and glanced through it. He furrowed his eyebrows as he read the reports, reaching up and scratching his chin, the same way he had when they were kids and he was figuring out something…_truthfully, it was why Dean called him Watson_…but there was just no explanation…not for any of this…one minute Dean was sick and dying and the next minute he wasn't… "What the hell?" Sam said in dismay.

Dean shrugged his shoulders, "I have no clue Sammy." He was every bit as concerned about this 'rapid recovery' as Sam was…because in his experience '_you never get something for nothing'_ and with this _recovery_…he was sure as hell getting _something._ His little brother was still wearing a look of disbelief, "Look Sam…I don't have any answers either…but I sure as hell want them. So let's just look into it…who did you contact about this?" Dean continued, playing devil's advocate.

Sam's eyes shot up to his big brother's wary green gaze. "I called several of the numbers in dad's journal…left a bunch of messages…and then I called Bobby…and before you get pissed about that…he told us to call if anything else happened…and I was just hanging up with him when you knocked on the door, so it couldn't have been anything he did." Sam really wished that it could have been Bobby…but there was just no way…he hadn't had enough time to set anything into motion. And Sam knew that the older hunter hadn't _known_ about Dean's condition. Bobby was a lot of things…but a great actor? _Nope_...the old man certainly wasn't one of those; he wore his feelings plastered on his face.

Dean huffed and then shook his head in rising irritation. "Fine. But if it wasn't' you and it wasn't Bobby…then who…dad maybe?" He knew that even mentioning their father was going to set off his little brother, but this totally had supernatural written all over it. Sam's eyes narrowed dangerously and he pulled his lips back over his teeth in a sneer.

"Dad….really Dean? You think that man gives two shits about us? Seriously?" Sam said through his clenched teeth, his eyes flashing dangerously. _There was no way that he was letting their father anywhere near his older brother...not until he and John had a 'talk'._

"Well don't get your panties in a bunch Samantha…I'm just guessing here." Dean shot out quickly, his own voice now edged with frustration and rimmed with anger. Sam's phone beeped with an incoming text message, causing him to throw an extremely irate look at the tiny silver device. It was totally interrupting their brotherly 'bonding' moment here.

"That phone definitely wasn't involved in this...so…you should check that Sam." Dean said as he closed his eyes and laid back tiredly against the pillows. Because while he was feeling a lot better, he was still physically exhausted.

"Don't tell me what to do Dean." Sam bit out as he opened the phone and accepted the message. Dean opened his eyes and shot Sam a one fingered solute before closing and opening them again slowly, watching his brother read the message. Sam read the text and then re-read the message just to be sure that he hadn't missed something...and then the phone slipped from his numb fingers…his eyes snapping up to Dean's like he'd just seen a ghost. Dean saw the instant change in Sam's demeanor, _big brother alarms going off all over the place._

"What?" Dean asked as he reached for the phone that Sam had just dropped onto the bed before he had stood up and started pacing back and forth like caged animal. Dean looked at the message and then sucked in a breath as his eyes flickered up to Sam's… "Well I'll be damned…" He whispered. Shock and confusion working into every nerve in his suddenly alert body.

*_This is the only freebie…be more careful._*

The text had come from an unknown number…and now they _knew _that someone was watching them…and that was just creepy as hell.

"What the hell…" Sam said as he scrubbed his hand through his hair and stared at Dean in confusion and frustration.

Dean just raised confused and slightly panicked eyes to Sam's…. "I got no clue Sam."

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Yup so definitely a clue…just not one the boys understand yet. They will be trying to track this lead though…because it's obvious that someone out there is keeping tabs on them…but to what end?_

**Please Review: They help to focus me…thanks to anyone that has taken the time thus far.**


	12. A Death or A Sacrifice

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster...obviously. Because these chapters are nearly falling out of my head. Thank you to any 'guest reviewers' since I can't PM you guys... _**

**Chapter 12**

_A Death or A Sacrifice_

"So do you think they're smart enough to track down the connection?" A voice asked in slight concern.

"Nope. Those two are only as smart as the leads that they are fed…and they won't be getting any more leads that will send them racing in our direction…at least until we want them to know. And eventually both the Winchester boys have a part to play." The second voice was smug as it answered the question.

"So…what do you think will happen now?" The worried voice asked again.

"Well, they'll probably go to that old hunter in South Dakota…and I suspect that they'll keep looking for their father…although after the stuff he did to Dean…" The voice whistled before continuing. "I'm not sure that he can explain those lapses in memory to either Sam or Dean…that's really too bad. It was kinda fun watching him wail on that kid." A chuckle escaped the throat before the other one interrupted again.

"Okay…so does the boss know where we're at with all this?"

"Of course…he's been kept apprised of all developments that involve the Winchester family…particularly those of the brothers."

"What about her?"

"She really only cares about the oldest one…she wasn't too worried about the geeky kid….she already knew what the deal was with that one."

XXXX

Dean pulled into Singer salvage yard at nearly 8pm two days after leaving the hospital under his own non-medically trained advice. His annoying little brother wouldn't let them get on the road until he was absolutely convinced that Dean wasn't suffering from any after-effects. Dean had grumbled and bitched…but Sam had stayed firm on that…they _weren't _leaving until the following morning…and that was _it._ So when 6am rolled around, Dean had bullied Sam out of his nice warm bed and they'd been on the road by 6:30. Both brother's had decided that coffee and breakfast was definitely in order, Dean had spotted a small diner off the side of the road and they'd stopped for a pretty decent breakfast special and typical diner coffee…which Sam had immediately 'doctored' up with cream and sugar.

"Ya know…for someone that eats as healthy as you do…that's a _lot_ of sugar." Dean said over the rim of his own cup of straight black coffee.

"Just drink your coffee…" Sam grumbled as he stirred the light brown liquid.

Dean raised his eyebrows and looked at Sam over the rim of his black coffee and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm just saying…"

"Well don't. When I want your opinion on what's _healthy_, I'll ask." Sam retorted just as the waitress had shown up with their food. That had been several hours ago and now he was waiting for Sam to get his chair out of the back, so that they could go talk to Bobby.

"Dean?" Sam asked when he didn't get an immediate response the first time. Dean's eyes flickered over to Sam's and he nodded as he grabbed the arms of the chair and pulled himself into it. They were just heading into the house, when Dean noticed that Bobby had built a 'ramp' up the porch steps. He smiled to himself at the gesture and Sam looked over at him in surprise. "I guess he wants us to come visit more often…" He said as he chuckled lightly.

"Yeah…looks like." Dean said quietly.

Bobby burst out the door of the kitchen and smiled broadly at the boys. "Well…come on…I've haven't got all day."

"Nice ramp." Dean said as he pushed himself up and angled through the door into the large old kitchen. He could smell the food before he even got all the way inside and his stomach grumbled at the scent of the steaks. "Dinner?" Dean asked as he looked over at the stove and saw two pots boiling merrily on the stove top.

"Yup. Thought you boys would be hungry."

"Always." Sam said as he set their bags down on the couch in the other room and walked back into the kitchen, seating himself at the table. His eyes immediately locked onto the computer screen and he was drawn into the article that Bobby had obviously been reading before they got there.

"What's this Bobby?" Dean said as he rolled over and settled next to Sam, reaching over to take the mouse from Sam and getting his fingers smacked for his troubles. "Hey…" He said indignantly as he pulled his hand back and shook it to get rid of the stinging.

"Wait your turn." Sam retorted.

Dean huffed and rolled away, heading to the fridge in search of a beer.

"So, you think that it might be witches?" Sam asked as he continued to read. He saw Dean stiffen out of the corner of his eye and he could certainly understand Dean's apprehension where anything to do with witches would make his brother uncomfortable.

Bobby nodded. "Yeah…I think so. Clues point to that anyways. I traced that unknown number and it lead back to man named Whitmore…he is a known witch or warlock…whatever they are. Anyways he sent the text…now one thing about witches…they serve…."

"Demons…" Dean said softly. Sam's eyes shot up and met his in surprise…it looked like there was way more to this 'miracle' than either of them had suspected. Dean felt his stomach twist at the thought of getting involved with actual demons. He hadn't seen any since he and his father had exorcised one four years ago and that hadn't gone well. In fact it was just after that that their father had started getting more brutal. Something was nagging him…he'd assumed at the time that it was his fault that they'd had the wrong intel going into that hunt. He wondered if that hunt actually had something to do with John's change in behavior.

"Sam…" Dean whispered. His voice was thin and he was shaking his head in denial as he raised worried green eyes to his brother's.

Sam was just getting ready to complain about being interrupted again when he noticed the state of his older brother. "Dean, what is it?" he asked as he stood up and crossed so that he had a better view of Dean's face.

Dean's mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water before he finally managed to say something to his increasingly worried brother. "I…think…that maybe…we gotta find dad…" he finished.

Sam inhaled deeply and then scrubbed his hand down his face as he looked over at Bobby, only getting a shrug of the shoulders from the older hunter. "Really? Because I thought maybe we could track this lead without him."

Dean shook his head. "No…I mean we _need_ to find dad. He knows what happened that night. I think he knows a lot more than either of us suspected. He's been tracking the thing that killed mom all these years. He thought that whatever was in that house that night…he thought that it would lead him to whatever that was…what if it was a demon Sam?"

Sam furrowed his eyebrows and stepped closer to Dean, "A demon…why?"

Dean exhaled loudly.

Bobby jumped in. "Balls! How did I miss _that_?" he grabbed his hat off his head and slapped it against his thigh in frustration. "Witches serve demons…and a coven that big…they are serving a pretty powerful one. But what I don't get is _why _they would save you from that electrocution with the Raw-head."

Dean shook his head in dismay. "I don't get that either Bobby…not unless they have a much bigger play in mind…one that we obviously know nothing about." Sam's eyes were darting back and forth between Bobby and Dean, he didn't like the direction this conversation was going in…it sounded like more bad news for his brother.

"That would explain why they didn't kill you that night." Sam said quietly. He couldn't believe that his brother was being used as a pawn on huge chessboard that neither of them could see. He wasn't going to allow his older brother to be sacrificed as some sort of game piece between a demon and their father. So it looked like whether he liked it not…they did in fact, need to find their father…and he was not happy about that development…not in the least.

"Yeah…I guess." Dean answered slowly, he was looking down at his thin useless legs in disgust…sometimes…he really wished that they had just killed him that night…because the closer he came to learning the truth…the worse it got. Instead they had left him capable of a fraction of what he used to be.

Sam was watching his brother carefully and he saw the instant loathing that plastered itself on his face as he realized just how badly he'd been manipulated. A part of Sam wondered if perhaps….had he stuck around instead of leaving for school…if he could have prevented all this from happening. If perhaps he would have seen the signs where Dean was unable to…he was always so close to their father that he would never have thought the man capable of anything this underhanded. But the evidence was piling up against him and Sam just wanted the rest of the answers so that they could reverse this crap.

"So that text…where did it originate from?" Sam asked as he turned back toward Bobby.

"Chicago." Bobby answered quickly. He knew that this was probably going to send the boys racing straight into a trap…but he also knew that their time was running out. Whatever that demon and those witches have in mind…it was nearly completed and for whatever reason they needed the middle Winchester alive…and that thought concerned him more than he was willing to admit.

Dean shifted in his chair and then shot a look at Sam… "I think we need to head for Chicago…see if we can track down the owner of that phone…that might put us one step ahead of this." A part of Dean was scared of bringing Sam along on this trek. He didn't want to get his little brother on these bitches radar…although he was a Winchester, so chances were that they already knew about him. But that knowledge didn't make the idea of potentially putting Sam in danger any easier for him to come to grips with. Plus he knew that there was no way that Sam would sit this out…not if he was going after the coven…Sam would insist on being there.

"Well, at least sit down and eat, maybe grab some shut-eye before you two take off to parts unknown." Bobby said as he walked to the cupboard and pulled out three plates and a couple of cups, setting them on the table and looked each of the boys in the eye before pulling the steaks out of the oven.

Dean's stomach growled again and he looked up at Sam, who nodded, and then rolled over to the table, claiming the end where there wasn't a chair. He ignored the flutter in his chest at the idea of maybe learning the truth about what happened that night…maybe even finding out how they could repair the damage. As far as their father went…well he wasn't sure that he was ready to see the man again…but he knew that he needed to.

Once they'd finished dinner, Bobby had the boys in the living room, where he'd set up a makeshift bed for Dean and brought his old tv in so that the boys could watch a movie or something if they wanted to. While both Dean and Sam were preoccupied with the coming trip to Chicago…they both recognized the effort that Bobby had made so theydecided that it had indeed been a while since they'd watched the Die Hard movies. So Bobby, ever the gracious host, had popped some popcorn and brought in a couple of beers for them as they settled onto the couch to watch the action movies.

"Do you even remember the last time you watched these?" Dean asked his brother as he settled back against the couch, he reached down and shifted his legs to a more comfortable position for his back and sighed when it made no difference at all.

Sam watched with a worried look as he saw Dean trying to get more comfortable and the look in his brother's eyes when it didn't work. He wondered if Dean was ever truly comfy…did he always have pain? Or was it just an obnoxious feeling that he couldn't get rid of no matter what he did? Sam wanted to know these things, he wanted to understand what Dean had gone through in the last year…but there wasn't really a way that he could ask those things. It wasn't like he'd been there to see Dean deal with the injury and the recovery…_no he'd been at school…safe_. The intense sadness and the guilt of that made him ache inside. Plus it didn't help that they hadn't really discussed what had happened at the Asylum either. He inhaled slowly and scrubbed his hand down his face as he tried to pull out of the funk that he could feel settling in. Dean glanced over at him and raised his eyebrows.

"What? You look like someone hit your dog or something." He said with a slight tilt to his head.

"We've never had a dog Dean." Sam certainly wasn't going to bring up _Bones_, the dog that he'd found when he'd run away in Flagstaff, Arizona when he was thirteen. He'd lived off Cheetos and coke for two whole weeks…they had been the best weeks he'd ever had…until recently when he'd realized that his brother may have taken a beating for _losing_ Sam. It had never occurred to him that Dean would be punished for his choices…but now he wondered how many of his selfish choices had gotten his older brother on the wrong end of their father's fists. He knew that he needed to change his direction here…he was getting pissed and nothing had happened to warrant that…and Dean wasn't going to want to hear any more about their father at the moment.

Luckily Bobby popped the movie in and handed Dean a plate of pie…_not apple thank god_… and neither of them noticed Sam's preoccupation with something else.

XXXX

Sam was standing in an abandoned warehouse…he didn't know where he was or how he'd gotten there, but it was dark and smelled of old paint fumes. He glanced around searching for Dean, his eyes finally falling on his brother near an old service elevator. Dean was motioning for Sam to follow him, for whatever reason…Sam had a really off feeling about doing that. Whatever was at the top of that elevator…it wasn't a good thing. He reached down and was glad to find that he had the bag with their weapons; he unzipped it and pulled out a shotgun before walking to Dean and looking at the irritated expression on his brother's face.

'What?' he mouthed at the retreating back of his brother. Sam shrugged and followed Dean into the elevator. The unsettled feeling in his gut growing as they rode the old lift to the third floor, he carefully pulled the gate up and Dean rolled out into the large open room. The only thing that they noticed was an alter set up near a window across the room. Sam started walking toward the table, with Dean barely a step behind him when they were suddenly hit by _something…_well multiple something's actually. Dean was thrown from his chair as a slash appeared near his left eye and he groaned when another invisible object slashed across his abdomen.

"Dean!" Sam called as he was smashed in the face and lost his balance and the world started to spin as another impact landed near his temple. His world started to go black, just as he saw something grab a hold of his brother and toss him into the air. Dean's legs flailing as his arms pin-wheeled and he hit a cement column just behind where his chair was bent into a twisted version of itself.

Sam felt consciousness returning slowly as he tried to reach up and touch his head in an attempt to alleviate the pain…but he found that his hands were tied behind his back and he was leaned up against one of those cement pillars. "Dean?" he called out as he felt his head clear slightly, he pushed his heavy eyelids open and waited for the world to come into focus.

"Sammy, you okay?" Dean asked softly from his right side. Sam's eyes moved lazily over until he could see the crumpled form of his brother. Dean was also tied to a pillar, but he didn't look too good. The blood was still coming sluggishly from the wound near his eye and there was definitely a distinct red patch growing on his stomach. His legs were set out in front of him, although it looked like one of them might actually be broken, it was twisted back in the wrong direction above the knee.

"Dean…you're leg…" Sam said as he watched with a pained expression as Dean looked down and nodded. He knew about the leg…he just couldn't feel it.

"Wow…that would really hurt a normal person." A female voice said as a blonde woman approached the boys from behind. Dean cringed at the accurate comment and Sam felt his anger rise rapidly as he watched the comment have the intended impact on his brother.

"Shut up bitch." Sam growled, his fuzzy head clearing as the anger pushed away the pain. He glared at the woman; she was wearing a brown leather jacket and had shoulder length blonde hair. Under any other circumstance, Sam would probably think she was attractive…but the shifty black eyes pretty much killed that for him. _Demon._ He thought instantly.

Dean had opened his eyes and slammed his wall into place, he wasn't going to allow some demon bitch to see him hurt…_no way in hell was that happening_. He looked over at Sam and was grateful to see that his little brother didn't look too bad off. He had a head wound he looked like he might have one hell of a shiner and a split lip, but that was it.

The woman smiled and then walked over to Dean; she squatted down in front of him, leaning in as she whispered something that Sam couldn't quite make out. But it caused Dean's eyes to widen in surprise and his forehead to furrow in confusion. She reached out and patted him on the cheek, and he pulled his face away from her touch, anger now evident on his face. "Go to hell bitch." He ground out through gritted teeth. She smiled and leaned in, placing her thin lips against his…she kissed him and Sam saw something shift in his brother…he didn't know what it was exactly…but something. Dean tried to pull his head away from the woman, but she reached up and deepened the kiss, "Get a room you two." Sam shot out as she finally pulled away and licked her lips…the action made Dean nauseous and he looked anywhere but at Sam.

Dean was more focused when she stepped away, his leg no longer twisted in the wrong direction and the wound on his side had stopped bleeding.

"Not bad Winchester…I think she'll be please with you…" She stood up and walked over to the large alter and then picking up a medallion and rubbing her thumb on it almost lovingly. "Yes…she's gonna be very pleased with your progress…you're daddy…he did everything and more." She snickered and then turned back to the boys. "But we're not ready to spill all the beans yet…just wanted to let you kids know to be prepared…because we are coming for you." She looked pointedly at Dean… "Particularly you cripple."

Sam bristled at the comment and watched as Dean sank into himself with the razor sharp words that the demon was throwing at him. "So what's the game plan here…kill us?" Sam asked. He almost hoped that she said yes…because what she had just said to Dean scared the crap out of him…who wanted his brother…and why? And what the hell did their father have to do with it?

"Nope, if I wanted you dead…the Deava's would have killed you long before now." She said simply.

Sam narrowed his eyes and turned to look at Dean in confusion. Dean's green eyes were wide and there was the beginnings of actual fear in them. "What Dean." He said quietly.

Dean blinked a couple of times and then said. "Deava's are ancient demons Sam…but they're nearly impossible to control. Kinda like letting a raging psycho out and telling them it's okay…go nuts…kill anything. They have a tendency of biting the hand that feeds them…in other words the one that controls them."

"Unless…they're controlled by another demon…idiot." She snarled. The Winchesters were looking around the room, eyes searching for the other demons. "Oh don't worry, the Deava's are in the room…their shadows are the only thing you can see."

Dean gulped as he saw the distinct shadow's move against the far brick wall. He could see them moving stealthily toward Sam. "What do you want from me? Let my brother go and I'll stay." He said, he didn't dare look over at Sam, because his little brother was yelling at him now.

"NO Dean! We agreed! We were doing this together." Sam's voice was strained and tight as he watched his brother try and sacrifice himself.

The demon smiled and stepped forward, leaning down into Dean's face again and placing her hands on his hips as she straddled him. "Sweety…you already belong to us…You're daddy saw to that long ago…but I'll tell you what…I'll let little Sammy go and you can stay and face the Deava's alone. How's that sound?" She purred in his ear, her tongue flicking out and licking the blood from the side of his face. Dean closed his eyes in disgust and his face took on a pained expression as he ignored Sam's loud protests.

Sam was watching with horror as the demon offered Dean something that there was no way that his brother would turn down…he could get Sam out of there and he would try and deal with the demon on his own. _Like hell!_ Sam thought angrily. "No Dean! This isn't an option. If we don't leave together…then we don't leave!" he yelled.

Dean's green eyes flitted in his direction and he looked down suddenly…no longer able to stand the pain that was flying through his little brother's gaze. "I'm sorry Sam…" he whispered as he looked at the demon and nodded his agreement to her terms. She smiled and snapped her fingers and Sam was helpless to do anything but watch as the Deava's tore into his brother…they made what the scarecrow had done look like a picnic. The tears were streaming down his face as he screamed until his throat was so raw that it hurt to breathe. He saw the light die in Dean's eyes as his blood soaked through the floor boards that they were sitting on.

The demon looked right at Sam and smirked. "He's gonna really love his new accommodations…Hell really has improved since I was there. New racks…new torture tools…really, he'll love it."

Sam felt as though he'd been punched in the gut…_Hell? Dean was in Hell? How? Why?_ "He was a good man…he wouldn't go there." Sam managed the whispered response around the giant lump in his throat. His voice was raspy from his attempts to stop the Deava's from killing his brother, his chest ached with loss and anger as he watched the woman smile and his hands were suddenly free. She shot out one last comment before she was simply gone…leaving Sam alone in the warehouse with the mangled body of his brother.

She raised her eyebrows at Sam and shook her head in mock sympathy. "He was…but you heard him. He agreed to stay so that you could leave. He just didn't realize _where_ he'd be staying…"

XXXX

"Sam! Wake up man, you're scaring me." Dean said as he shook Sam for the fifth time. Sam was drenched in sweat and he was moaning and…_son of a bitch…were those tears?_ Sam was crying in his sleep now? This was definitely not something that Dean had ever seen before. His little brother so wrapped up in a dream that he couldn't wake him up. This must be one of those visions that he'd been telling Dean about….and Dean didn't really like them…not one little bit.

Sam's face was pinched in obvious pain and he'd pulled his enormous body into a ball, his knees to his chest and his arms wrapped around them…like he was trying to hold himself together. Dean had been on the couch and Sam had fallen asleep on the floor, he'd woken up his older brother when he'd started thrashing and calling out. Dean was now lying on the floor next to Sam; his brother had pulled him off the couch accidentally. He leaned over and placed his hands on both sides of Sam's face and watched as Sam's blue-green eyes peaked out between the previously clenched eyelids. "Sam?" Dean said quietly.

"Dean?" Sam said and then he was all flying arms and body as he wrapped his older brother in a hug and buried his head in Dean's shoulder. The tears started to flow again as Dean just sat there stunned…he was leaning against the couch, his back supported by the old red thing. He was intensely grateful for that…because otherwise, his little brother would have pushed him over with the strength that he latched onto him.

"Sam…what the hell happened?" Dean asked, worry working into his usually steady voice as he pulled Sam into him and hugged him back, before pushing him away slowly so that he could see his brother's face.

Sam's eyes were red and he was still trying to get control of his breathing under control. But Dean was alive and that was all that mattered. "We are NOT going to Chicago." Sam said firmly.

Dean raised his eyes and looked at Sam in confusion. "Why not?" he said as he tried to find out what the hell was going on with Sam. "Another vision Sam?" He really was worried about his brother.

Sam took a stuttered breath and then looked Dean square in the face. "You die there Dean. We're not going. We'll find those witches and dad another way."

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _So this was a tiny take on the idea of 'Shadow' from the first season. But I wanted to introduce the demon's into the story and get closer to revealing how John is involved and what is in store for both the boys._

**Please Review: I appreciate the time you take to tell me what you think about the story.**


	13. Yin and Yang

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash. Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 13**

_Yin and Yang _

Dean stared at Sam with a bit of a blank look on his face…he didn't know what to say…he had known that the visions seemed to center around him getting hurt. He still had no clue _why_ his brother was able to see things that involved him. But he definitely hadn't seen this _one_ coming….and judging by Sam's elevated breathing and his weary red rimmed eyes…they were certainly not going to Chicago. As much as Dean wanted to track this lead…he wasn't willing to subject Sam to _this._ "Okay Sam…we won't go." He said softly as Sam continued to stare at him, his eyebrows drawn together and nodding his head slowly. The pain was still lancing through his head making his vision a bit blurry, his brother's face swimming in the watery image his eyes were shooting back into his brain…but he was pushing it off as he stared at his older brother….gratitude written in every fiber of his being.

"I still want to find dad, Dean. I just _can't_ lose you in the process." Sam said quietly and looked away for a moment before hauling his gaze back at his brother's concerned green eyes. He sniffed and ran his sleeve over his nose and then he nodded and moved to stand up, Dean's eyes tracking every move that he made.

"You're not _gonna lose_ me Sam…" Dean said softly as he watched Sam head into the kitchen in search of water and some aspirin for the headache that Dean was sure he must have. Sam didn't hear the comment, but Dean now knew that his little brother _was _worried about _that_ and he was going to do everything in his power to ensure that that outcome never happened. But they _did_ need to find their father and he needed to know how he was involved in whatever their father seemed to have gotten him into. It still didn't sit well that somehow he'd been used as a bargaining chip with demons or witches…or whoever. Be he needed the truth…and so did Sam.

"Sam…?" Dean called as he reached behind his hips and pushed himself back up so he was sitting on the couch again, shifting his legs and then covering them with a blanket…he knew that he did _that_…tried to cover them more often than not…it meant that he didn't have to look at them.

"Yeah?" Sam answered as he walked back into the room; his eye's narrowing to ensure that less light infiltrated his pain filled eyelids. He sank down wearily onto the couch at the other end from Dean and turned to look at his brother. Dean was dismayed to see that the white around Sam's right eye was blood red, where the blood vessels had popped due to the intensity of his last vision. He sighed and looked away for a moment as he tried to calm the increasing worry that building in his system the more he looked at Sam and the physical damage that these _visions_ were doing to his little brother.

"What else did you see in that dream Sam? Besides me dying…" he asked as he glanced back up at Sam carefully looking for any reactions that might indicate that his brother was getting ready to lie to him. It wasn't that he didn't think Sam would talk to him, but he was wondering if there might be some clues in that dream that could help them without either of them having to die…because that was not something either of them wanted to see happen.

Sam looked as if Dean had just hit him in the head with a brick…he sputtered into the water glass and started coughing as he tried to control the involuntary reaction of his throat to the introduction of water into the wrong pipe. Dean started pounding Sam on the back, "Whoa…slow down there Sammy…." He said as he waited for Sam to stop coughing. A few moments later he finally gained control of his sputtering and then looked at Dean, his eyes were watery but clear as he pressed his lips together. He was stalling…Dean recognized the technique and he wasn't going to allow Sam to do that.

"No Sam…come on man…what happened? You gotta give me more than just the fact that I die." Dean said as he sat back and folded his arms across his chest.

Sam opened his mouth and then popped it shut again as he looked at his brother in rising irritation. "Isn't the fact that 'you die' enough…" he said with disbelief. He was currently shaking his head and looking at Dean through the fringe of his bangs.

Dean furrowed his eyebrows and breathed in deeply, this wasn't coming out right. "Yes it is Sam…I just…please _tell_ me what happened…" He was staring at his little brother and what he saw both scared and warmed his heart. Sam was worried about him…he was concerned about his older brother's future.

Sam closed his eyes and rubbed his temples with the palms of his hands. "It was a demon Dean. She told you…that if you stayed she would let me…go…" Sam's voice hitched and he stopped to gain control again.

Dean knew what he had done…it was what he would do every time if Sam were in danger… "I stayed didn't I?" he said quietly.

Sam nodded and sniffed again.

"She didn't let you go?" Dean asked softly. He didn't want to scare his brother into clamming up on him. He really did want to understand what Sam had seen and how they could use it to their advantage and maybe get ahead of this thing.

"She…she…said you were in…Hell…" Sam chocked out and the tears were running down his cheeks again as he was immediately transported to that warehouse and the image of Dean's broken body was swimming in front of his eyes. He closed his eyelidss as the emotions threatened to overwhelm him.

It was nearly killing Dean to watch his little brother suffer like this. He'd never been good at watching Sam _hurt_, whether by injury or just the intense cruelty of humans. But knowing that he'd caused this breakdown…that was nearly killing him inside. And the fact that he was going to continue to question Sam…well that was the most difficult thing he'd done since he'd learned he was paralyzed. But they needed answers and Sam had them… "I'm not going to Hell…Sam. But we do need to know what we're up against here." He leaned over and gently placed his hand on Sam's knee. "Is there anything else you saw that can help us here?" His green eyes were earnest and his guard was down, allowing Sam to see the fear and the anger that was welling just beneath the surface…like a volcano waiting to explode and simply building strength.

Sam nodded. "She said they have a plan…for both of us." He whispered as he looked up tentatively at his brother. Dean's eyebrows rose nearly into his hairline, he _really_ didn't like the sound of _that._ _A plan? For both of them?_ "She talked about demons called Daeva's …they were the ones that…k…kil…killed you." He stuttered out.

Dean nodded and blew out a breath as he brought his hands up and ran them through his hair. "Ancient demons…those damn things are almost impossible to control…"

Sam cut him off… "You said that then too Dean…she told us 'unless they were being controlled by another demon'." His voice was getting stronger as he moved more into a recounting of the vision instead of an actual visual recollection.

Dean raised one eyebrow. "So demons can control other demons…good to know." He rolled his eyes at that particular piece of information…_just what they needed demons that could be put on a leash._

Neither boy saw Bobby leaning against the banister near the base of the staircase. He'd been listening since Dean had asked about the vision. He stepped into the room now as he added something to the conversation that he thought that they should know. He hadn't gone to bed earlier; he'd pulled some _really _old, not mention rare, books and done some reading trying to understand exactly what was happening to Sam. And what he'd found out didn't make him feel all warm and fuzzy. These two boys were in more danger than either of them had any clue. "I think I know why they want you two…" he said as he sank into the chair behind his desk and looked each Winchester in the eye as he poured three glasses of scotch and watched as Sam stood to grab the glasses, handing one to Dean and then downing the amber liquid.

"Okay…a little more to go on would be great here Bobby." Dean quipped as the older hunter narrowed his blue eyes and tilted his head to the side. "Sorry…" Dean said quietly.

"What did you find Bobby?" Sam asked as he set the empty glass on a table next to the couch.

"Well, I was reading some of the more rare books that I have and they talk about a particular spell that will allow demons to walk freely among us…no longer bound to possessing a body…but with all the same abilities…and it requires two people of the same blood lineage. It's called 'Sed Paribus Seperant'…_Separate but Equal_. One is born to the light and one is born of the dark…they are essentially yin and yang…one is light with a little dark and the other is dark with a little light. But they must be 'prepared'…one is fed demon blood when very young and the other…well the other does time in Hell…the whole 'righteous man' thing. Lore says…that the one born of darkness will sacrifice the one born of light…" He trailed off when he saw the absolutely horrified looks that the brothers were giving him. Sam looked like he wanted to throw up all over the floor and Dean looked as though Bobby had just fed him a salad or something equally healthy…he was…just _green_…and his eyes were wide with surprise. "Each side of the lineage has the choice…they can use their bond for good or evil…but they are strongest when together…weakest when separated. Apparently is has something to do with their souls…separate but equal parts of _one_ soul in two bodies." Bobby had started to wonder about this rare piece of lore when he'd learned of Sam's visions; if this might be the case with the boys…he'd really hoped that he was wrong. But knowing what he knew now…he wasn't…and knowledge was power. So he'd made the decision to tell the boys about this and they were going to move heaven and earth to ensure that neither Winchester brother was lost.

Sam's eyes shot up and collided with Bobby's. "Are you saying that I have _demon blood_ in me?" he rasped out as he looked over at Dean. Dean's eyes were wide and he was also staring at Bobby...waiting for an answer to that very plausible question.

Bobby exhaled with great effort and leaned his elbows on the desk top. "Yeah...I think that's why your mother died that night Sam...I'm pretty sure it was a demon and that they were after you then...but Mary walked in..."

Sam's eyes were panicked as he considered that he might be somehow responsible for the death of their mother when he'd been six months old. He looked to Dean...part of him was terrified that Dean would blame him for losing their mother. But he saw nothing but love and worry in his older brother's emerald green eyes...he looked sad, but that was it...there was no blame or anger directed at Sam.

The Winchester boys were of the proper lineage…and they were also soul-bound. It was the only way that Sam would be seeing things that had happened to Dean…because it was happening to the other part of his soul…they were inextricably connected. "I think that's why Sam keeps seeing stuff involving you Dean." Bobby finished.

"Wait…are you saying that Sam and I are _soul-mates_?" Dean asked incredulously as he looked at Sam and shook his head. Because there was no way that that could be what this whole thing was about…he and Sam…they were amazingly close for brothers…but that was it. He knew that beyond a shadow of doubt he and Sam were both _only_ interested in the fairer sex. So this whole thing sounded seriously 'wonky' to him.

"No…not _soul-mates…soul-bound._ It's different Dean. I'm not saying that you're romantically linked to your brother you idget. Cuz, I'm pretty sure that's illegal in all 50 states… I'm saying that you are bound through your blood and that you share parts of one soul. It's actually a pretty old idea…normally you see it referred to in the Japanese culture…sometimes Chinese. But it doesn't usually have anything to do with people…they generally refer only to its use as energies…being light or dark. In your case…it's the energy of the soul." Bobby said as he watched the two brothers blink rapidly and try and wrap their heads around a whole new twist to their already seriously messed up lives.

"So what does this mean?" Sam asked. He was watching Dean really closely, trying to gage how his brother felt about this whole idea. Right now…he couldn't tell a damn thing that Dean was thinking. He had that wall so firmly in place that Sam might need C-4 to break through it.

"It means we need to do a lot more research and then we _need_ to talk to John and find out exactly what he did…if indeed he _did_ anything." Bobby said as he watched _his boys_. He'd thought of them as his for a long time now…ever since John had shown up on his doorstep with a 9 year old Dean and a 4 year old Sam and asked what he knew about demons and the supernatural. As he watched the men that those children had grown into…he couldn't have been prouder of _who_ they had each become. Despite his injury Dean was still trying to save people that were less fortunate than himself and Sam…well he might be one of the smartest men that Bobby had ever met. And the bond between these two…it was growing every day that they were together. It was that _bond_ that was making them a target for the supernatural in the universe. But one thing that Bobby was absolutely sure of…they would not be getting their hands on these boys…not if he had anything to say about it…and _damn-it, he was going to have something to say about this._ "We are going to get a head of this." He said sincerely.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Sorry for the delay on the chapter. Needed to determine exactly which direction I was going to take this in. So it's going to involve a lot more Bobby and eventually John will be making an appearance…although Sam isn't going to be too receptive to that. Thanks for reading._

**Please Review: A shameless request…I know. **


	14. The Hunt for the Colt Begins

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**Synopsis: **Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new _situation._ I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy.

Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so any and all grammatical errors are my own. **Not Slash.**** Brotherly love and Angst only…**

**_Please Review: They make me feel guilty and write faster...although this week does not reflect that due to 'life' getting in the way... Thank you to any 'guest reviewers' since I can't PM you guys._**

**Chapter 14**

_The Hunt for the Colt begins _

Dean was sitting in his chair staring at the sunset…it was beautiful. Golden light filtering through wispy white clouds and soft purple rays were sifting into the setting sun. He shifted in his chair as he looked out at the light, his mind filtering through what he had learned over the last few weeks. Thoughts of Sam and their father fighting for his attention as he tried to put what they had learned into perspective; the addition of Bobby to their fight would hopefully give them an advantage, but who knew. For the past year all he could think about was trying to deal with this _disability_ and how he could try and fix it…now…he just wanted 'them' to be okay…him and Sam…and maybe even their father if they could find him. A part of Dean desperately wanted to feel the Impala rumble beneath him and…god…did he want to walk up to Sam and give him a hug from a standing position… Dean didn't want to feel like an imposition whenever he went anywhere…and most of all he wanted to be _normal_ again. He wanted to walk into a bar and hit on a pretty girl and not wonder if she was only talking to him because she felt sorry. And…if he was really honest with himself…he wondered if that was why Sam was staying…with him. Because he felt sorry for Dean…

Dean was so drawn into his own thoughts that he didn't hear the soft footsteps approaching…not until a hand rested gently on his shoulder. His initial reaction was to jump, but without the response of his leg muscles all he could manage was a slight shift above his hips. Every time this happened it simply reminded him that he was _indeed handicapped_ and that really just…_sucked_. He finally glanced over and was surprised to see Bobby looking off into the distance with him. "You okay kid?" he asked softly.

Dean inhaled deeply and then reached down and turned his chair so that he was looking in the older hunter's direction. "No…not really…I mean…I don't know…I'm worried."

Bobby nodded. "About which part?" He asked as he stared at Dean quietly.

Dean chuckled without a trace of humor in the action. "Which part?... Seriously Bobby…? All of it…everything! I don't know what to think about this entire thing. What's gonna happen to Sam? He's not evil Bobby…and he's not ever gonna turn _evil_…" Dean finished strongly; his sparking green eyes watching Bobby carefully, almost like he was daring the older hunter to disagree with him.

"You _really_ think I doubt that Dean?" He said steadily as he turned and looked pointedly at the worried man in the wheelchair. It bothered him that Dean thought that _he_ might be concerned about where Sam's heart truly resided…that maybe he thought Sam was a _bad guy…_just waiting to get out…and that maybe the youngest Winchester would become some sort of evil incarnation of himself…and Bobby wasn't worried about that…not at all. He knew that Sam was a good man with more of a conscience than most of the priests and ministers that he had met over his many years as a hunter.

Dean eyed him and then nodded when he didn't see any further evidence that the other hunter thought his baby brother was one of the _bad guys._ Dean would do anything to ensure that Sam was taken care of and that included taking him away from here if he thought for a _second_ that his little brother was being _profiled_. Luckily the other hunter seemed to understand that just because this _dick_ demon thought that they could turn Sam…didn't mean that they would succeed. Dean would lay odds every time that Sammy was stronger than whatever _they _could throw at him. There was still a small part of him that wondered just what their father had had to do with the demon in the first place. And he still wanted that information, but not at the expense of Sam's sanity…that just wasn't' worth it in his opinion. Hell, as much as he wanted to walk again, if it meant putting Sam in danger then it simply wasn't worth the risk. He looked down at his legs, they were leaned against the left side of the chair, his feet settled on the metal plates and twisted slightly to the inside. He narrowed his eyes at the thin useless limbs…and then turned his attention elsewhere. This wasn't something that he could change right now…and it might simply be a part of his future…but now there was a part of him that hoped and prayed that Sammy would be too…and if he could have _that…_then he could live with this.

XXXX

Sam woke up to a quiet house. He hadn't realized just how tired he was…his eyes were slightly blurry and he slowly pulled himself into a seated position on the couch. "Dean?" He called out…his only answer the silence of the house and a slight squeak from the floor as he shifted. He narrowed his eyes and leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees and running his hands through his too long hair as he took a moment before pulling himself tiredly to his feet. He still had a slight headache from the nightmare _vision_ that he'd had the night before. He couldn't erase the image of Dean on the floor of that warehouse and he couldn't forget the cries of pain as the demons had torn his brother to shreds and he had been helpless to stop it. Sam now understood that there was an agenda here…he and Dean were part of something so much bigger than themselves and they needed to slow down and do some research.

And yet they also needed to find these witches so that they could fix Dean. Sam knew that their father had somehow put Dean in this position and that unless they were able to fix that…there was a good chance that whatever the man had set into motion…_would kill Dean_. The idea of losing Dean to something like that demon…well…it simply was _not_ going to happen on Sam's watch. He was not losing his brother…sure they'd had their disagreements before, but the simple fact that Dean hadn't thought that he could call Sam when all this _crap _had happened…_that _needed to be fixed. His brother needed to know that he _could_ contact Sam about anything and that Sam would expect him to. He walked to the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water, he had just about down the whole bottle when new levels of pain sliced through his skull and sent him to his knees. The water bottle forgotten and slipping from his lax fingers only to spill the remainder of its contents all over the floor of Bobby's kitchen.

_Sam was walking next to Dean, he was rolling along in his chair and he was talking animatedly about something…but Sam was having a hard time understanding him. He was looking at the area, they were headed down a long stretch of highway and there were no cars anywhere in sight. It was just the black highway and them…the Impala wasn't anywhere to be seen. _

_"Sam? Are you even listening to me?" Dean complained from his left. His brother smacking him in the leg with his fist, to ensure that he got his little brother's full attention. _

_"Ouch…yes Dean, I'm listening." He lied quickly. Sam tried to remember what his older brother had been talking about…but he was drawing a complete blank…he soooo had not been listening._

_Dean huffed and then continued with his commentary. "So this guy Elkins has a gun that can kill demons…or so Bobby thought." They slowed as a driveway appeared from nowhere…it was well hidden in the trees and they would have definitely missed it in the Impala. Which was what Dean had been worried about, so they had hidden the car about a half mile back, Sam had been worried about Dean and his chair. But his stubborn older brother had said that he was 'just fine, thank-you-very-much, and that if Sam could make it walking then he could totally make it rolling.'_

_Dean rolled along the paved road; Sam was walking just slightly behind him, reading a text message from the older hunter. Bobby had told them that if they could find this Elkin's guy, then they stood a decent chance of getting out of whatever crap their father had gotten them into. The gun would go a long ways toward keeping the demons off their tail. Plus, they could start searching for the witches for real at that point. The only thing that the older Winchester knew so far was that they were not 'allowed' to go to Chicago. So instead they had taken off for Colorado with the understanding that this guy could help them. But as they approached the small cabin-like home, he began to wonder just how good this idea had been, it was currently dark with nothing to indicate that there was anyone living there at this point. He glanced over at Sam and was surprised to see Sam paying close attention to the darkened windows and the slightly ajar front door._

_Sam glanced at Dean and realized instantly that his brother couldn't maneuver up the stairs, there was no ramp and he knew his independent brother wasn't going to allow Sam to carry him up those steps. "Dean, wait here." Sam whispered without waiting for a response and quietly ascended the stairs. _

_"Sam….no." Dean whispered back loudly. But he wasn't quick enough to grab his brother's jacket before he was out of Dean's arm reach. "Shit." Dean said as he moved so he could see a little better._

_Sam slipped inside the house and looked at the damage that had been done; it was obvious that there had been a struggle here. The desk was over turned and there were papers thrown around the room, almost as though someone was looking for something that they hadn't found. He threaded his way through the dark room and finally found an open safe in the floor boards. Whatever had been there…it was long gone now. Chances were good that it was the pistol that they had come here to retrieve._

_Dean watched Sam's shadow move from room to room, the hair on the back of his neck stood up and he heard a rustle of leaves behind him before he felt an arm slip around his neck and his air was suddenly being cut off. He struggled with the person that was currently trying to strangle him, his legs flipping this way and that as he tried desperately to shift his weight and get the upper hand. Finally he felt his vision start to blacken from lack of oxygen and he was pulled from his chair and tossed to the ground. As he looked at the fading image he was able to gasp out one word before the world crashed into darkness… "Dad?"_

XXXX

Sam was leaning heavily against the door of the refrigerator, his knees sore from hitting the ground and then staying in that awkward position for far longer than was healthy. White hot pain was slashing through his head as he tried to control the rolling nausea that was threatening to climb his throat and make an unscheduled appearance on Bobby's floor. Sam's hands were clutched into his hair as he heard the door squeak open and the now familiar sound of rubber that reflected the tires of Dean's wheelchair as his brother rolled through the porch and into the kitchen. Sam made an effort to rise from the floor, but his head and the rumble of his stomach made that a bad idea.

"Sam!" Dean said, his surprise masked by the concern that colored his voice as he rolled to a stop next to Sam, gently placing his hands on his brother's broad back. "Sammy?! What happened…you okay?" Dean asked through the strain of his worry as he looked at the pale visage of Sam and the pain that was obviously pasted on his little brother's face.

Sam gulped in air and cast his face in his older brother's direction as he looked to Dean with blood shot eyes, shaking his head and holding up a hand, asking silently for a moment. He turned form his brother so that he could collect his thoughts and try and think around the pounding percussions going on inside his head. "Vision…" Sam managed as he pulled himself to his feet and stumbled slightly as he covered the few steps to the kitchen table, slowly sinking into one of the sturdy chairs. Dean rolled immediately to his side and leaned down a bit so that he was looking Sam directly in the eyes.

"Another vision?...what was it this time Sam?" he asked quietly. His green eyes were wide and worried as he waited for Sam's answer. Dean was dreading just what the hell Sam would have seen this time. By now he had come to the conclusion that his little brother's visions seemed to involve him and that they were also revealing parts of the past that Dean had no desire for Sam to know. He hope that this wasn't one of those visions… But there was another part of him that wanted to know just what the hell was happening with Sam…because the whole vision thing…well it was freaking the shit out of him.

"Dad…Dean I saw dad." Sam mumbled. His own blue-green gaze crashing into Dean's worried expression. He watched as his older brother's whole physical reaction changed instantly. He stiffened and then looked at the floor before hauling his gaze back to Sam's and nodding slightly.

"Okay…was it bad? Like last time?" Dean's eyes were narrowed and he was looking pointedly into Sam's own gaze. He was looking for anything that might help him decipher what exactly Sam was seeing and why.

Sam shook his head carefully. "Not as bad…really…I mean he kinda knocked you out. But I didn't see anything else." Sam wasn't exactly sure what he meant by that…their father had _chocked_ Dean out…damn-it he and John were having one hell of a discussion about this shitty treatment of the middle Winchester. Sam wondered how many times a person could be knocked out before there was permanent damage.

Dean raised his eyebrows at that. "Where were we? And why were we there?" His voice was shallow and raspy as he asked his brother about the dream. He knew that it hurt Sam to recount those vision-dreams, but he couldn't help his little brother if he didn't have all the facts. And right now…he had _no_ facts.

Sam took a deep breath before continuing. "We were in Colorado, looking for a guy named Elkins, and a gun that can kill demons…some kind of Colt." Dean's expression took on a surprised look at he took that in…_a gun that could kill demons. Yeah, that would be pretty damn useful at this point._ He thought.

"Wait…a gun that can kill demons? Like send them back to hell…kill them?" Dean asked quickly. His eyes were wide and confused as he tried to understand just what it was that Sam was saying.

"Yes." Sam answered through the pain clenched teeth and the hands that were currently resting against his closed eyes.

"That's kinda big…Sam." Dean said quietly. He looked away as he wondered if that meant that they could undo whatever their father had done. _Or was there a chance that dad had been possessed when all that stuff had gone down between me and dad…? _He wondered silently.

Sam snorted and immediately regretted the action. The pain shot through his head like a stampede of cattle and he groaned as he felt the bile flutter up his throat. He clamped a hand over his mouth and surged to his feet, sprinting for the bathroom with a worried Dean following as quickly as his wheels could turn. "Sammy?!" he called as he heard his brother slam the door of the bathroom and the immediate sounds of retching that came from the other side. "Sam…you okay?" Dean called through the wooden door. He leaned forward and rested his head against the cool dark wood and closed his eyes as he listened to his brother empty the contents of his stomach. This had to stop…Sam couldn't keep going like this, whatever was causing these dreams needed to be dealt with…and soon. They couldn't keep having their lives messed with by the supernatural…well not to this extent. He supposed that it was different when they were the hunters…but right now…he felt more like the hunted.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Sorry this took so long to get out, life really got in the way this week. I will have the next chapter out ASAP, and it will have the boys back on the road as they search for Elkins, their father, and the colt._

**Please Review: It's like leaving breadcrumbs for my muse…she loves them.**


	15. We Should not have Stopped Here

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 15**

_We Shouldn't have Stopped Here_

Bobby hadn't considered the idea that the legend of the Colt might actually be based in truth until he had heard all of Sam's vision-dream. He was currently staring at the Winchester boys with a somewhat dumbfounded look on his face. Dean looked green and was throwing worried looks in Sam's direction every few minutes. Sam was ignoring his brother and staring at Bobby as he waited for some additional information. "Uh…Sam. I've heard of the colt…but no one's ever actually seen it…not that I know of. You sure your dream-vision things aren't going off the rails here?"

Sam huffed and leaned forward as Dean shot an irritated look in Bobby's direction. "No, Bobby. I'm not sure of that…I just know what I saw. And it seems that you are confirming that there is indeed a gun out there that can _kill_ a demon." He finished with a slight hitch in his voice.

"Bobby, look…we know that this isn't normal. But everything that's happened with us over the last several weeks has been anything but normal. So…is there a chance that this Elkins guy has this gun?" Dean said through clenched teeth. He wasn't angry with Bobby but it was seriously annoying that they were having to try and convince a _hunter of the supernatural_ about the existence of a gun that could kill _said-supernatural_. He looked over at Sam and was surprised to see his little brother throwing a grateful look in his direction. Dean smiled slightly as he tried to convince both himself and maybe Sam that they were going to be okay. At this point he was getting more and more scared about these visions…he couldn't explain them and they couldn't predict them…making Sam a walking disaster waiting to happen…a freaking time-bomb just waiting to go off. But there was a part of Dean that wondered, that if they were able to track down these damn demons and _make_ them fix all this shit…if maybe Sam would be okay.

Bobby inhaled slowly and looked each brother in the eye… "I suppose there is a possibility that this _gun_ exists." He said grudgingly.

XXXX

Dean wasn't exactly sure where they were at the moment…he'd been driving all day in a direction that the old hunter had sent them and...it seemed as though Bobby had sent them toward some little backwards town. He and Sam were currently sitting in a bar drinking a beer and looking over the information that he'd given them as well. Well..._Sam was looking at the information, Dean was throwing darts at a board on the wall_. They still had another twelve hours until they got to where this Elkins guy lived, but they needed to stop and take a break from driving. Dean still wasn't that comfortable in the car for _really_ long drives. His back causing him pain and as for Sam…well he was still dealing with the aftermath of the visions that he'd had. His head was still obviously bothering him as indicated from the pained grimaces he kept throwing in Dean's direction every time he hit a bump _accidentally_. Sam would have added 'air-quotes' to that statement. Since he seemed to think that his big brother was doing it on purpose…which he definitely wasn't.

So as soon as Dean had seen a motel he'd stopped and then he'd talked Sam into going to a local dive bar down the street from where they were staying. Sam was flipping through the folder of articles that Bobby had sent with them. "Dean…I'm just not seeing anything here that'll help us." He said.

Dean rolled his eyes at his little brother. "Well, keep reading there geek-boy. Cuz, Bobby wouldn't have sent that crap with us if there wasn't anything in there that would help." He smiled snarkily at Sam and then looked over his shoulder at the bathroom. "I gotta take a leak Sam."

Sam huffed and then blew out a breath of air as he watched his brother start to roll toward the nasty looking bathroom door. _Damn, I wish they would keep these places cleaner._ He thought silently. "Dean I'm gonna head out side, we should get some sleep since we gotta head out really early tomorrow morning." Dean spun toward Sam and exhaled loudly as he narrowed his green eyes at his little brother.

"Really, Sam come on…let's get one more drink." Sam threw _bitch-face _number 3 at his older brother and shook his head 'no'.

"No Dean. We need to sleep…I _need_ to sleep man." He reached up and rubbed his eyes as thought to prove that he was tired.

"Fine… captain buzz kill." Dean said as he thinned his lips and glared at his little brother. He turned back toward the bathroom and went to finish his business.

Sam watched his brother roll away and sighed as he gathered his stuff and put it back into his bag as he stood to exit the bar. He walked out into the darkness and wrinkled his nose at the smell of cigarette smoke that hung heavy in the air. There was no one outside…he was it. He snorted and turned to walk to where the Impala sat at the back of the parking lot. He could have sworn that he heard something, he stopped and set the bag on the trunk of the car and then leaned down to see if there was something under it. When he squatted down a black cat jumped out and hissed at him and he inhaled the surprise and then laughed out his nerves as he stood back up. Sam never saw the crow bar that connected with the back of his head. But he was instantly out cold, his large frame slumping to the ground bonelessly as he was rendered unconscious from the blow. Blood trickled out of the wound that split open on the back of head and pooled for a moment on the ground before he was hauled p and dragged from the parking lot and thrown into the back of an old pickup truck.

Dean rolled out into the parking lot, he noticed the rancid smell of old smoke and he exhaled as he ran a tired hand over his face. He glanced toward the end of the lot where his car was parked. And there was no sign of his little brother. "Sam?" he called as he started rolling toward the car. He looked around as he moved…not seeing anything…no large frame of a shaggy haired brother anywhere. "SAM!?" he called louder. Dean pushed back to the entrance of the bar, he grabbed one couple as they exited. "Have you guys seen a guy? Young guy, tall, with dark brown hair?" He asked as his worry grew exponentially inside of him.

"Na…sorry man. Haven't seen anyone." The man said he walked away. Dean narrowed his eyes and looked again, suddenly noticing that there was a camera mounted to an electrical pole. _Traffic camera…_ he thought. He noticed something as he approached the Impala again…Sam's bag. Wherever his brother was…he hadn't gone intentionally. Someone took his little brother…

XXXX

Dean was pushing his wheelchair over the rocky pathway, he was glad that he had trail-bike tires on the chair...he'd figured out within the first couple of months that he'd been in the chair that the conventional tires wouldn't work for him. He and the local sheriff had tracked an old truck to this location and he was positive that this is where Sam was being kept. He wasn't sure why...but he _just knew_ that he would find Sam here.

He saw a large barn off in the distance. "Son-of-a-bitch…" he muttered as he pushed past the twin doors on the back of the barn. The first thing that Dean noticed was the smell of the old barn, it smelled like rotted flesh and burned meat as he entered the dark main floor. He leaned forward in his chair as he looked around corners and checked for lights or other indicators that there might be people close by. A voice sliced through the darkness and Dean released a breath he had been holding since he had discovered that someone had taken his little brother while he'd been otherwise engaged.

"You're Sam….Winchester?" A female voice asked. The sheriff's…Dean could tell that from where he was. The voice that answered he would know anywhere…at any distance…it was Sam.

"Yeah…How did you…?" Sam asked.

"Your cousin Dean…he's looking for you." She said quietly.

"Thank god…" Sam said quickly. His voice was relieved as he realized that his brother was indeed looking for him.

He heard something moving in the darkness, so he sank back into the corner of his cage. Sam grabbed the piece of conduit that he had pried loose earlier…and waited for the asshole to come around the corner. A head appeared slowly about three feet off the ground and rolled quietly around the blind-corner as the muzzle of a shotgun came into view. "Dean?" Sam asked as his brother materialized in front of him.

"Sammy?" Dean said, his voice so clearly relieved as he rolled over to the cage, that Sam smiled. "Thank god…whoa…this lock is gonna be a bitch." He said as he looked at the industrial grade electrical lock that was holding his baby brother captive like an animal. "Key?" he asked hopeflully. Sam shook his head and pointed at the power box on the wall.

"Seriously?" Dean said in exasperation as he looked at the obviously powered down electrical locking mechanism. "Shit…Sammy…why is everything so difficult when we're involved?" Sam shrugged in response before offering some useful information.

"He usually had the key on a chain around his neck." Sam told him as Dean rolled toward the exit. "Be careful Dean." He continued. Dean raised his hand over his shoulder and then rolled through the door.

Dean was surprised to see that the old house had a ramp…he wasn't sure why they had a ramp…but he was certainly glad as he silently rolled up and through the back door. He peeked around a corner and felt the bile climb the back of his throat as he saw the taxidermy and the pieces of skeletons hanging from the ceiling. The smell in the house was nauseating…it smelled like formaldehyde and rotted flesh and it made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. He saw an old man in the kitchen, a boiling pot of _something_ bubbling on the stove behind him as he sliced through an animal carcass. Dean blew out a silent breath as he continued to roll through the house; he saw a jar on a shelf that had a pile of keys in it. He hoped like hell that the key that he needed wasn't lost in that nearly full jar of anonymous keys.

A girl stepped in front of him and his eyes widened as they connected with the dead blue eyes of the dirty little girl. She looked to be about 13, with snaggled blonde hair and dirt covering her pale pink dress. The most disturbing thing that Dean noticed though was the plastic clips holding her hair back, like some cutesy little kid…but the look in her eyes…it was that of a killer. She wasn't the fun loving little girl that she should be…no she had been trained and influenced to be something else. He held his fingers to his lips. "Shhh…I'm not gonna hurt you." He whispered as he looked carefully over his shoulder for the old man.

She smiled…and it was one of the most disturbing things that he had ever seen. "I know…" she said. "Daddy! Daddy!" She screamed. Dean tried to roll forward and completely missed the man that stepped up behind him...as the old man came into his line of vision. He didn't hear the other footsteps as another man stepped up and slammed the butt of a rifle into the side of his head. Pain flared through his temple as the world went instantly black.

Dean felt his head shift slightly as the pain came in throbs and then he felt a slap connect with his cheek and he rolled his head to the side as his eyes slid open. The sight that became clearer as he lifted his head and looked into the eyes of the old man…made Dean's heart speed up. He saw his and Sammy's deaths…reflected out that man's brown eyes.

"You with that pretty cop?" he asked as he stared at Dean. He looked over at the two men that were standing slightly to the left and the little girl that was watching hungrily.

"I got a toothbrush in my car man…seriously…you can have it." Dean quipped as he looked at the rotten yellow teeth of the old man. He never saw the hand slapped the back of his head, but he felt the pain as his head slammed forward from the force of the blow. "Ouch…" he said as he glared at the man smiling in front of him.

"Anyone gonna come looking for you?" The old man asked as he looked over at the boys and the girl. Dean watched the interactions between men and then looked over at the little girl.

"Anyone ever tell you that it's not nice to marry your sister?" Dean said snarkily and was rewarded with another slap to his cheek. His head was spun to the right and it felt like his eye was gonna pop out of his head from the pressure of the blow.

"Gonna teach you to shut that smart mouth…boy." The old man said as he stood and walked past Dean to a fire place. Dean couldn't see what he was doing but he heard the wood shift and the crackle of the fire as something was removed.

"You ever killed before?" The old man asked from behind Dean. "Probably not since you can't even walk…" The man snickered as he slapped Dean's useless legs and then bounced from the left to the right.

Dean furrowed his eyebrows as he thought about the answer. "Depends on what you mean?" he said as the man walked around the chair with a glowing red poker.

"I've hunted all my life…deer…bear…even killed me a cougar once. But the best hunt is human…" he looked to Dean for a response. When he didn't see what he wanted he leaned forward and laid the glowing end of the fire poker against the inside of Dean's thigh. He wanted to scream from the pain…from what the pain should have been…but there was _no pain._ And that made the tears burn in the backs of his eyes as he stared at the old man.

"Geese...that's what this…is about? You yahoo's hunt people…?" Dean said through clenched teeth, he was trying to ignore the flashes of pain that were pounding through his system. That didn't bode well for Sam…or that sheriff that was in the cage next to his brother.

"Get the hell away from me." He yelled. His fear building as he looked at the burn that had now singed through his pants and smell that radiated from the burn. He tried to move but only succeeded in shifting his shoulders, since they were still tied behind his back. The old man handed the branding iron to his son and reached for a knife that Dean hadn't seen off to the right. He twisted his upper body as much as he could, but the knife slid along his cheekbone and he felt the hot burn and the warm trickle of blood that flowed from the wound. "Gagh…." He cried as he tried to move his face away from the blade. One of the boys grabbed the iron and plunged it into his shoulder, causing Dean to cry out as the pain rocketed through his abused flesh. "God…no!" he whispered as the blade was tearing through his skin. The girl had taken it from her brother and thrust it into his thigh…

"Looks like we're gonna have a hunt after all boys….and _you_ are gonna pick the animal."

Dean's green eyes went wide as understanding sank into his head. "No I'm not…" he said quietly.

The old man pulled the knife from Dean's thigh and grabbed the glowing poker again and laid it on the inside of Dean's other thigh. Dean could smell the burning flesh….

The poker was pulled from his thigh and then placed less than two inches from Dean's left eye. "The boy or the bitch…choose…or I'll take an eye." He said and Dean could feel the sweat running from his head as the heat from the piece of iron dripped down his face. Dean couldn't believe that he was being put in a position that he was going to have to pick between and innocent woman and his brother. But one thing he did know was that Sam was a lot stronger than that woman and he would be able to take on these bastards. They had told him that they gave the 'runners' a weapon and with any sort of weapon Sam would be able to win….of that Dean was absolutely sure.

"The guy…the guy…take the guy…" Dean said through his teeth as the hand that was holding his head still left what he was sure would be bruises on his chin.

"Okay take the boy. Jared…shoot him in the cage. Don't let him out." The old man said as he looked pointedly at his son. Dean's head shot up and then he twisted it from side to side as he looked at the freaky family in horror.

"What? You said you were gonna hunt him…give him a chance." Dean stated as he struggled to keep the fear from seeping into his voice. His insides were tied up in knots at the thought of Sam dying and he felt the bile threatening to spill from his throat that he had been the one to _choose _this. He had chosen his brother and now there was a good chance that his little brother…the one person that he had been tasked with protecting…might be dead by his choice.

"When you're done with the boy…shoot the bitch. We're gonna clean this mess up." He said as he turned back to Dean and ran the blade along Dean's chest…slicing through the shirts and into the tender flesh of his chest.

"God-damn-it…stop!" Dean cried as the pain washed through his body and the blood dripped down his abdomen soaking into his jeans. A chuckle escaped the man's throat as he looked at the boy tied to the chair in his living room.

"Watch him Missy." He said he handed her a knife and then walked out of the room leaving Dean alone with the girl.

"Yes pa." she said as she looked at Dean. A hunger in her eyes that made the blonde man extremely nervous. She stepped forward held the knife out so that it was a couple of inches from his eyes and then walked around the chair leaning in as she looked at his back. It was broad and there were no wounds there as of yet. She squatted down and looked at his hands, they were tied behind the chair and there were no wounds there either. She figured that she could fix that.

"Missy is it?" he asked.

"Pa said not to talk to you."

"Missy…just let me go…where's my wheelchair. Me and my brother we'll leave and your family will be safe." He said as he looked around trying to see where the little girl had gone. It made him extremely nervous having her out of his sight.

"Shhhh…" he heard from behind him as pain blossomed on his knuckles. The girl was slicing into his hands with her blade, crossing the cuts and opening his knuckles to the bone. A part of him wondered if he deserved this….after getting his brother attacked.

Dean hissed in pain as he tried to bite back his reaction to what the little girl was doing. She suddenly stood and headed toward the front door…he watched as she moved and he felt the blood drip from the numerous wounds and the dizziness that was starting to cloud his brain. He struggled with the ropes as he tried to free his hands…finally he felt the blood lubricate his wrists enough he could slip them out of the ropes. He leaned forward and listened for Missy's return…when he heard nothing he pushed himself forward and fell to the floor. Apparently the fact that he couldn't move his legs had meant that they didn't feel the need to tie his ankles. White hot agony shot through his body as the burns made contact with the floor and the denim of his jeans ripped at the blackened flesh. The cuts on his hands burned with pain as he pulled himself through the house looking for his wheelchair…he heard someone coming…the sound of boots crossing a wooden floor and he inhaled as he finally saw his chair in the corner. But there was no way that he was going to reach it before he was discovered by those clicking boots. Dean was terrified now…he had gotten his brother killed…probably and now he was going to die at the hands of some redneck hick killers…that were nothing more than…human.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _This chapter was meant to mirror the Bender's episode...changed somewhat due to Dean's current condition. But it does play into the search for their father…wait for it…it's coming in the next chapter._

**Please Review: This is my totally shameless request for feedback. **


	16. Family Reunions

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kirpke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price….one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 16**

_Family Reunions_

The boots were getting closer…Dean wasn't sure why Missy hadn't come back yet, so he crawled until he could lever his beaten body into the chair again. He groaned inwardly as the burns on his thighs pulled and the wounds on his knuckles seeped blood onto the tires of his chair. He was just settling himself into the chair when a figure rounded the corner….

"Dad?" Dean whispered as the figure of his father came into view. John Winchester was thinner than Dean could ever remember seeing him and his face was lined with worry as his eyes landed on his eldest son. His eyebrows drew together in confusion as he saw the chair that Dean was currently sitting in.

"Dean? What happened?" he asked as he walked toward his son.

Dean shrank back into the chair, suddenly forgetting about his wounds as the past years of abuse flared within his mind. Only to be pushed back as he thought about Sam and the fact that those bastards had gone out there kill him in cold blood. "Dad…Sam!" he said as his breathing sped up and he started pushing his chair toward the kitchen door where the ramp was located.

"Dean…He's okay. I already got him out of the cage." Their father's blue-green eyes looked away for a moment before coming back to rest on Dean again. "He wasn't too happy to see me…but I asked him to wait with the sheriff. I didn't want more of us in this house than there already was." John glanced around the house and then back at Dean's burned and broken form. "Dean…what happened?" he repeated.

Dean looked down at his legs and then back up at his father. "You mean you don't know?" he asked quietly. His father shook his head 'no', and Dean felt his heart drop…_their father had to know what was going on. He was Dean's last hope of fixing this. He was the connection between the witches and the demons and what they had done to Dean._

"I'm sorry son…I don't remember much…not for a long time now." He said as he walked over to where Dean was staring at him.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Dean asked as he tried to look his father in the eye. It was hard for the last few years he had tried to look anywhere than in his father's eyes. He had hated seeing the disappointment and the anger that was always just beneath surface of those expressive orbs. But not tonight…there was nothing but sorrow and sadness.

John was just getting ready to answer when Sam came rushing through the front door. "Dean! You okay?" His little brother asked breathlessly as he glared at their father and knelt in front of his…_holy mother of…had these bastards _tortured_ his brother?_ The thought ran through Sam's head before he could get a hold of it and was obviously reflected out his own eyes as Dean's gaze dropped from his and he moved his hands to try and cover the wounds on his legs. They were still bleeding sluggishly…but this only succeeded in showing Sam the damage to his hands.

Sam gasped at the slices into Dean's hands and the way the blood still oozed from them as he tried to hide other injuries. This whole _Dean getting hurt thing_ really wasn't cutting it with him. They needed to stop putting the middle Winchester in danger….because honestly; he didn't think that he could take seeing his brother in this type of condition anymore. Sam cast his gaze over to their father, his own blue-green eyes narrowing as he stood to all of his 6'4 height and stalked over to him. This was the first time that he had seen their father since he had gained another 4 inches in height. He was gratified to see that he now towered over their father by a good three inches. He crossed his arms across his broad chest as he stared at the elder Winchester and raised an eyebrow, _in a pretty good imitation of Dean_. "Where the hell have you been?" he asked through gritted teeth. His eyes flashing dangerously as he ignored the silently pleading look that his older brother sent him. Sam knew that they needed to get Dean out here and get him cleaned up…but their father some serious explaining to do. And Sam wasn't sure that he wanted the man to know where they were staying until he had explained some of the shit that had happened over the last few years.

Dean's eyes flickered from his brother's dangerous expression to the confused and slightly sad face of his father. Dean didn't know what was going on with his dad, but he did know that Sam wasn't going to _understand_…no matter what excuse their father had. He felt his vision start to darken slightly as he watched the _stand-off_ between his family. He tried to stop the forward momentum of his body as his started to shut down…he didn't know if it was from pain or blood loss…both probably. But his world darkened and his eyes slipped shut.

Sam's eyes were drawn to the sudden movement of his brother as he watched Dean's body slipping to the floor. "Dean!" He cried as he lunged forward to stop the unscheduled descent of the wheelchair bound man as his body slumped and he dropped into unconsciousness. His fingers grabbed onto Dean's shirt as the body dropped…he felt the familiar weight of his older brother settle into his arms. "Dean…come on man…wake up." He said as his voice shook from the stress of the last couple of days. Their father rushed forward. "NO! I got this." Sam said as he glared at his father. He gently lowered Dean to the dirty floor and looked over at John with narrowed eyes. "We need to get him out here…" Sam didn't want him anywhere near Dean, but he didn't have a choice. While Dean had lost weight, he was still close to 170lbs and they needed to get him out this shithole quick. He inhaled slowly and ran a bloody hand over his face as he debated and finally waved their father over.

XXXX

John nodded as he took the hint and walked over bending down to pick up his son's emaciated legs…the blood still dripping from the wounds inflicted by the fucking crazy family that he'd been tracking. He hadn't known that his boys would be in the area…hell he did the best he could _not_ to run into them. John still had holes in his memories…in fact…he couldn't remember the last four years…he hadn't been able to recall anything since the night that he and Dean had gone to a bar searching for a skin walker. They had gotten separated and he hadn't been able to pull any memories until about two months ago.

He had been surprised to find that neither of his sons were around, he had called Caleb and Pastor Jim…and the story that they had told him made him cringe all the way to his toes. He had thrown up until there was nothing left but bile and the taste of failure in his gut. What did a person say when they were told that they had abandoned their sons…one to a life as a cripple in a god-damn wheelchair and the other to a life that was wholly unprotected and bitter. He had done that…somehow he had been possessed and then he had destroyed his own sons and he couldn't remember a fucking thing.

Caleb hadn't wanted to tell John. Somehow he had thought that John Winchester had really turned into that much of a bastard since Mary had died. And although John would be the first to admit that he had his faults…he would never have abandoned his sons. Then he had talked to Pastor Jim and that had been another night of emptying his stomach as he learned that he had repeatedly beaten his eldest son over the last three years until he disappeared the night Dean was injured and left to recover in some lonely hospital. The guilt was palpable and he didn't know how to deal with it as he looked into the angry and scared eyes of his youngest son.

"Let's get him out of here." John said.

XXXX

Sam narrowed his eyes at his father and gently grabbed his brother under the arms and hauled as they stood up in tandem and walked to the door and down the ramp. John had his truck parked closer than the Impala…and Sam wasn't even sure where Dean had put the car. He hoped that it wasn't too far away, but he really didn't know. Sam wasn't willing to lay his brother in the bed of the old truck so he opened the passenger door and gently laid Dean down as he crawled up and cradled the bloodied blonde head in his lap as he slid into the center of the seat.

"Can you…get his chair?" he asked their father.

Sam wasn't sure what he saw flash across his father's face, but it definitely didn't look like it belonged there. He shook his head and ran his fingers through Dean's sweaty hair, his hands trailing over the cuts that had finally stopped bleeding on his cheeks. "Dean…this has to stop." He whispered to the unconscious form of his older brother.

He heard John throw the metal wheelchair into the back of the truck and then the click as the driver's side door opened and his father got in. He looked over at Sam and the still unconscious form of his eldest son and raised his eyebrows. "He stopped bleeding?" he asked as he started the truck and put into drive. The sheriff had told him to get the brother's out of there before the FBI arrived to deal with the psycho's that had lived here.

Sam threw an angry look at his father, the anger and bitterness written in every line of his handsome face. "Do you really even care?" he asked through gritted teeth.

John looked out at the rainy highway as he pulled off the gravel road and headed toward the only motel within 50 miles. He knew that this was where his boys were staying…because it was where he would have stayed if he had gotten a room before he went out to the old house and found out that his sons were tangled up in this mess. He looked back at Sam… "Yeah…Sam. I care." He said evenly as he pulled into the parking lot.

Dean started to shift slightly as the truck came to a stop and their father hopped out and came around to help Sam get him into the motel room. Sam pulled the key from under the mat outside the motel door…they had hid it there before heading to the bar. Just in case one of them decided to leave early…they had adopted the practice when they were younger and Dean would forget and take the key when he went out with a girl. Leaving Sam to try and break into the room after leaving the library or school or soccer practice…it hadn't happen more than once and Dean had been _so sorry_. Sam had let him off the hook but Dean had never really forgiven himself…so they had come up with this as a possible solution for future _conquests._

"S'mmy? You kay..?" Dean asked as his eyes fluttered and he rolled his head back and forth listening for his little brother. His glassy and pain filled emerald irises finally connected with his brother's worried blue-green gaze and he settled almost instantly.

"I'm here Dean...and I'm fine." Sam said as he sank onto the bed next to his brother's hip. He watched as his brother's eyes slid closed and a small smile pulled at the corners of his chapped lips.

"We need to clean and bandage his wounds Sam."

Sam exhaled loudly as he stood and up and stared at their father in disgust. "I'll take care him dad. We've been taking care of each other for a long time…" Sam narrowed his eyes and furrowed his eyebrows. "Can you get his chair out of the truck?" he asked as he turned and grabbed the first aid kit his father had set down on the table. "And then can you find his car and get it back here?" Sam wanted their father out of the room while he dealt with the aftermath of the Benders…he knew that Dean wouldn't want their father to see him like this. And while he hadn't been there for Dean like he should have been in the past…that was all over now…_he would be there to help Dean…as much as his stubborn older brother would allow him to.  
_He was done dealing with his older brother's constant need to _protect_ him...it was Sam's turn to return the favor...and protect his family...and he'd be damned if he was going to fail. Everyone in Dean's life had failed him somehow...Sam wasn't going to be on that list anymore. It was time to come off the _naughty _list and move over to Dean's _nice_ list. Not that his selfless older brother would ever have put it that way. He would never have placed Sam on a list like that...but then again, it wasn't Dean putting his name over there...it was Sam...and he wanted his brother to trust him again. Like he had when they were kids, before all the abandonment issues had surfaced and he had let his anger at his father and his intense dislike of _this life_ to drive his older brother from his life. They were in this together...and he would get to the bottom of where their father had been too...he owed that to Dean.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _John's back. But he still has a lot to make up for. And will Sam forgive him for the shit he's pulled? Plus, the hunt for the colt is still on along with the search for the damn demons._

**Please Review: They help me move forward…thanks.**


	17. Taking Care of Dean

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 17**

_Taking Care of Dean_

Sam didn't want to deal with his father while he was trying to take care of his brother's injuries, but he knew he didn't have a choice. He reached for the scissors and sliced up from the ankle to the crotch in Dean's bloody and torn jeans, gently pulling at the material hoping that it would come easily from the thin legs of his brother. As he got to the thigh area he stopped as the jeans were all but glued to the wounds on the insides of Dean's thighs. He sighed sadly as he stood and walked to the bathroom gathering wet warm towels and then heading back out toward his brother's prone form. His gaze flickered over the wounds that those bastards had inflicted on his brother, the split lip with blood dried on his chin. Then there was the blood that had dripped from a nearly eight inch slice across Dean's chest and finally there were his legs to contend with along with the wounds on his hands to Sam would need to deal with…soon. As Sam sank down onto the bed next to Dean's hip, looking at the enormity of his brother's injuries, a thought occurred to him that had him seeing red almost literally as rage flooded through his system.

Dean wouldn't have been able to feel the depth or the pain from the wounds on his legs…but he would have _smelled_ the flesh burning on his own body…the multiple burns on the insides of his thighs were at least second degree…close to being deep tissue burns. And then there was a stab wound in the upper part of his left leg…_son of a bitch…_how had he missed that…? Sam inhaled slowly and placed the towel on the crusty blood waiting for it to soften so he could gently pull the material from the burns and deal with them. He knew that there was a good chance that there could be an infection that would start to settle in if he didn't deal with these wounds quickly. He hoped that his stubborn older brother wouldn't wake up as he cleaned and bandaged the wounds, because this wasn't going to be fun…for either of them.

Sam peeled the now softening material up and hissed through his teeth at the damage. The burns were each close to four inches in length and the stretched between his brother's thighs stopping about two inches from a _sensitive_ area that should never be privy to such intense heat. His eyes were then drawn to the knife wound and he grabbed the needle and thread and pushed the leg of his brother's boxer-briefs up and set to sewing the cut up after it was disinfected. It took twenty stitches both subcutaneous and on the surface to close the wound effectively. He rubbed the burn cream over the two wounds and then placed non-stick curad pads over the burns and secured them in place.

He then moved to Dean's chest to deal with the eight inch gash across his brother's chest. He cleaned the wound and then stitched it closed as he looked at the wound on his brother's left shoulder as well. It looked like the bastards had shoved a hot poker into his brother's shoulder. The puncture wound was cauterized as though they had stabbed Dean with it while it was glowing white hot. His guilt was compounding as he treated each wound individually…it was kinda his fault that this had happened. He hadn't seen the Bender that had knocked him out cold and thrown him into a cage and then his older brother had come to save him…and he'd been tortured as a result. And that was nearly killing him inside…that he had failed Dean on so many occasions and this was just one more to add to that long laundry list.

Sam then leaned up and looked at his older brother's face and then started to clean the two clean cuts along his cheekbones…again with the stitches. He made them small and neat to minimize the scarring as he dealt with the injuries. The last of the wounds that he needed to deal with were the slices into his brother's hands. These in conjunction with the burns were the ones that were making Sam nauseated the most…he could feel his gut rolling and twisting as he cleaned the clean, almost surgical slices into the tops of Dean's hand and his knuckles.

"S'mmy…you kay?" Dean asked quietly. He reached up one bandaged hand and touched Sam's leg in a silent reassurance that his little brother was there. His questing fingers encountering the solid form of his little brother as Sam reached out and gently pushed Dean's injured hands back down.

"I'm fine Dean…you need to rest. Think you can swallow some water and some pain pills?" Sam asked as he grabbed the bottle of water off the small table next to the bed. Dean blinked sluggishly at him, his green eyes glassy with pain and the blood loss making him paler than normal.

"Think so…" Dean said quietly as he continued to search Sam's body for injury. There was something that he should be remembering…something that had to do with their dad. But he just couldn't seem to grab the floating thoughts before they dissipated into nothingness. He heard the door open and the rush of cold air as it was shut again. Dean worked to see through the fuzzy edges of his vision as he tried to see what had just walked into their room. Since Sam was currently looking at him in concern and he knew that Bobby wouldn't have had time to get where they were. He cast his eyes in a wide arc and finally found them falling on the face of their father.

Dean felt an irrational fear launch inside his chest as he looked into the blue eyes of the man that had abandoned him and in all likelihood traded his son's life for his own. At least according to those visions of his little brothers. And then another icy cold tendril of fear slithered into Dean's heart…Sammy…if he was unconscious then Sam was vulnerable to anything. He could feel his grasp on the waking world slipping as both blood loss and the pain pills that Sam had given him started to kick in. The last thing that he saw was the angry visage of his little brother rising to his feet and standing protectively above his bed. _What an awesome big brother he was…couldn't even protect Sam. _

Sam glared at their father as he rolled the wheelchair through the door and his blue eyes landed on the form of his eldest son. They flickered back up to connect with the angry fire that was damn near spitting out of Sam's gaze as he stood and folded his arms across his chest. He turned to ensure that Dean was starting to fall asleep…he didn't want to get into anything if there was even the remotest chance that his older brother would wake up and hear the conversation. Sam had no intentions of pulling his _punches_ with his father. The man had sold out Dean and left him to battle through the toughest thing that the blonde haired man would ever go through. And Sam just wasn't ready to forgive him yet.

He'd broken Dean in ways that Sam wasn't sure could be fixed…not that his stubborn brother would ever admit any of that. But Sam wasn't stupid, he'd seen the way that Dean looked at their father. He'd seen the fear and the hurt flash across his brother's face the instant that their father had materialized. So while Dean might be able to forgive their dad for the _mistakes…he could hardly call what John had done 'mistakes'…_he wouldn't be quite so easy a sell. It didn't help that Sam had _seen_ exactly what had been done to Dean over the 'missing' years...and he wasn't ready to forgive their father for that.

John cast his gaze at the bed as Dean slipped into unconsciousness again. "Is he okay?"

Sam snorted and raised an eyebrow as he narrowed his eyes, his tone was ice cold when he finally answered the question. "No…he's not 'okay'…do you really even care?"

John looked like Sam had socked him in the jaw. His eyes widened and then narrowed as he decided how to deal with this version of Sammy. This wasn't a man that was going to take orders…and that actually pissed John off. He'd done the best he could for these boys…and yeah, he'd made mistakes and he was going to continue to make mistakes…but that didn't mean that he didn't love them.

"Sam…" he said as he sat in a chair and scrubbed a hand down his face. "You don't' understand…"

Sam latched onto that and his anger increased as he threw his hands into the air. "I _don't _understand?! Then explain it to me dad. Explain how you could leave Dean in a crappy hospital and disappear for that last year? Explain how he wound up taking the '_bullet_' for you in that cabin in the first place. Oh, and while you're at it…explain why you felt the need to blame him for my choice to leave and go to school. And last, but certainly not least, explain why you felt the need to _beat the holy loving shit_ out of your oldest son? Yeah…cuz really dad…I'd love to hear your _reasons_ for all of those things." Sam was nearly vibrating with anger as he finished and worked on staying rooted to his spot on the floor or he was going to knock the crap out of their father.

John stared wide eyed at his youngest son. He knew that he'd trained his boys to be strong and able to speak their minds…though not usually to him…but this side of Sam? He'd never known that such a strong and independent mind existed in his youngest son. The man that Sam had become was something to be reckoned with…he could see that from the almost tangible power and rage that was rolling off the boy as he stood guard over his brother's prone body. He wanted to explain, he really did. But what could he say…_oh hey Sam…I can't actually remember the last four years so I have no idea what I did. And even more…I can't be held responsible for it._ Yup, cuz that would go over really well with the extremely angry young man staring at him in disgust at the moment.

"Sam…" He started and watched as Sam stiffened and shook his head at the defeated tone he heard in his father's voice.

"You know what dad? I don't want to hear it." Sam said coldly as he turned back to Dean and sank down onto the bed next to his brother's hip. He reached out and ran his fingers through the short blonde hair and then trailed them over the cut on the right cheek. He cringed inwardly at the sight of his brother's injured and sleeping form. Sam heard their father pull himself to his feet and then walk to the door.

"I'm going to go get a room for the night Sam. If you need…." Sam cut him off immediately.

"We won't." He said in an icy voice, just before he heard the door click shut. "I'm not gonna let him hurt you anymore Dean." Sam whispered. He was surprised to feel his brother's hand shift and gently clasp his. Dean wasn't awake, but he was seeking comfort…and he was seeking it from Sam. "I've got you big brother." He whispered.

XXXX

The first sensation that Dean felt was warmth…he was warm and he felt safe. And he hadn't felt that in a really long time…so the sensation was definitely foreign to him. The second sensation was decidedly less pleasant. Pain…dull waves of agony rolling through his system as he tried to just lie still and recapture his previous feelings of safety. But the pain wasn't going to allow him to ignore it. His head hurt…because he'd been bashed in the skull by some bat-shit crazy hillbilly. That brought him to his first thought…Sammy?! Dean pushed down the nausea as he forced his heavy eyelids open and blinked slowly as his eyes adjusted to the low light in the room.

"Sam…?" he called quietly. He heard the immediate footsteps and then his little brother's shaggy head popped into view. Sam looked worried but there was also relief in his expressive blue-green eyes as he forced a smile onto his face and sank onto the bed next to Dean.

"Hey…how you feeling?" Sam asked as he glanced over Dean's body for anything that indicated a change in his condition.

Dean drew his eyebrows together as he registered the question and tried to think of the best way to answer it. Because telling his worried brother that he felt like 'roadkill' was probably not a very good idea. Sam looked like he was barely holding his emotions together as it was…so he really didn't need Dean dumping his woes onto already heavily loaded shoulders. Dean remembered seeing their father…although a part of him wondered if it was just a trick of his imagination...some hallucination of fevered and pain-filled mind.

"Okay I guess…M'm alive…" Dean closed his eyes against a wave of pain and clenched his fists into the scratchy sheets of the motel bed. Sam didn't miss the action and was immediately leaning forward to stare into Dean's face.

"That's what matters…Dean…what can I do?" Sam whispered as he watched his brother wipe the pain from his face and open his glassy green eyes, only to stare owlishly at Sam. He shook his head slowly and then immediately regretted the action as he felt bile threaten to make an unscheduled appearance.

Dean inhaled slowly, since the action caused pain to crash across his chest and fire to lance through his shoulder. It occurred to him that the injuries to his legs were probably very painful…at this particular moment he was glad that he couldn't feel it. Because he wasn't sure how much more of it he could take. "Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"Did I imagine…dad?" Dean asked in a softly hoarse voice as he looked at Sam in a way that made Sam wish that his brother had _imagined _the presence of their father.

Sam shook his head 'no', and reached out to lay a gentle hand on Dean's uninjured shoulder. The look that flashed across his usually guarded brother's face was abject fear and loathing…but not for their father…which is who he should be loathing. But directed at Dean himself. He was laying on a crappy motel bed after being tortured when he tried to rescue his brother…and he was hating himself for it. It made Sam feel sick inside.

"He got his own room Dean." Sam looked at the slight relaxation in his brother's furrowed brow as a sign that he was grateful that the man wasn't staying in their room with them. "I'm not gonna let him hurt you Dean." Sam said…and then he immediately regretted it as he watched his brother's face fall and the instantaneous self-hatred that oozed from Dean. _Damn-it. This wasn't going the way that Sam had hoped._ He'd wanted to reassure his brother not make him feel like Sam didn't think he could take care of himself. Hell, he could obviously take care of himself, since he'd come after Sam and _almost_ managed to rescue him…despite his rather glaring handicap. But those were words that Sam would take to his grave…he would never call his brother handicapped. Because even in this _condition_ his older brother was more capable than the majority of the human race.

Dean felt the shame slither through him, like a serpent, as he looked silently at his brother. Did Sam really think that he needed to be 'protected'? Because if he did…then Sam had it _all _wrong. It was Dean's responsibility to protect Sam…not the other way around…and somehow he was going to have to remind his little brother of that fact. He decided that it was too dangerous to let Sam see these raw emotions, especially in this unguarded form…so he pulled in a ragged breath and steeled his features…clearing them of the rejection and the fear that was always thrumming in the back of his head. "He isn't going to hurt me Sam." Dean managed to bite out as he turned his head from Sam and stared at the wall.

"Dean…" Sam started, only to be interrupted by his brother.

"No Sam…just leave this alone…" Dean turned and looked straight into Sam's worried eyes and his own mask slipped for only a moment as he added. "Please Sammy…" The last words were spoken in a whisper before Dean was dropping his eyelids closed. It was an old trick…one that Sam had seen a million times growing up. Whenever Dean didn't want to talk about something, he would simply feign sleep. And truthfully, he was pretty good at it, Sam had had to learn to watch for the slight flutter of his brother's eyelids to see if he was really sleeping or simply 'ignoring' Sam.

Sam decided to let it go for now…but they were going to have to talk about this at some point in the future…he'd make sure of it.

XXXX

The soft knock on the door a few hours later had Sam flying out of bed, his sleep addled mind trying to make sense of where he was and what was going on.

"Sam?!" Dean called from his bed, he'd pushed himself up onto his elbows…his face flushed with what Sam knew could only be a fever, the stitches on both his cheekbones making him look _so _much worse. Sam shook his head and held his hand out toward his brother in a comforting gesture as he hauled himself out of bed and padded slowly to the door. He grabbed his silver Taurus on the way, and looking at Dean as he held a finger to his lips and his older brother instantly silenced on response.

"Sam? Dean?" Sam rolled his eyes and released a lungful of air in irritation as he flung the door open and his father raised an eyebrow at the sight of his youngest son standing there shirtless with only his running pants on and bare-feet.

"That can get you killed Sam." John said as he brushed past Sam and marched into their room, setting a tray of coffee's on the table and a white bag which probably contained donuts. He glanced over at the other bed and saw that Dean was indeed awake and watching him with confused and fever bright eyes. "Shit…Sam when did the fever start?" he asked as he stepped closer to the bed.

Dean couldn't control the impulse to shrink back from his father as he watched the man approach his bedside. His vision was blurry and he couldn't tell if his father had a weapon in his hands or not…maybe he'd come to finish what the demons had started…

Sam spun around and glared at their father as he slammed the door shut and walked back to his bed, crawling in and putting the pistol under his pillow as he pulled the blankets back up. "I already gave him some Tylenol and I put cold compresses on his head earlier dad." He grumbled against his pillow. "I know how to take care of a fever…" Sam finished as he pulled his head up long enough to shoot a pissy look in his father's direction. "And another thing…don't tell me _how_ to do anything…you lost that right a long time ago."

John bit back the angry retort that flooded into his mouth at the insolence of his youngest son. But Sam was right about a few things…he had lost the right to tell his sons what to do. That had been lost when his memories were taken nearly four years ago. For all he knew…_he glanced over at his eldest son…_he was guilty of getting Dean hurt like this.

"Sam, I'm not here to fight. I just want to help Dean."

Sam groaned and pulled himself back up and turned to stare at his father… "Why? Why now dad? You had four years to help him…and all you did is break him down and leaving him bleeding and busted in some shitty cabin." Sam glared at John. He had no intention of pulling his punches where his father was concerned. In fact the man was lucky that Sam wasn't throwing real punches…just verbal barbs.

John looked away and then scrubbed a hand down his face in frustrated sadness. "Sam…I don't remember…anything from the last four years." He sighed and sank into the chair at the small table. "I swear, I didn't even know that Dean was hurt…and god…Sam do you _really_ think I would…" He could barely say the word as the bile threatened to come spilling out. "_Abuse_…my own son? Was I really so bad that you think that's actually possible? I know I was hard you boys…but this is a rough gig Sam…I was scared…for both of you." His eyes were so sincere that Sam halted the smart-ass retort that almost pushed past his pursed lips as he listened…really listened to his father. _Was it possible that their dad had been possessed for the last four years? If so, then what the hell had happened to Dean? And, oh God…if it was a demon that had been abusing his brother…then there was probably a lot more that Dean wasn't telling him. No wonder he'd looked at their father with abject fear and shame._ Sam mused as he stared his dad.

"I don't know what to think…but I know that Dean was the one that got hurt here…and that _can't _happen again." Sam folded his arms across his chest and set his jaw. "I won't _let_ that happen again."

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _John had information for the boys and Dean will continue to heal back up. They should be back out on the road in the next chapter with a new lead that will take them straight out of the frying pan and into the fire. Gonna be a good one_.

**Please Review: Take the time and let me know if you are still enjoying the story. Reviews fuel my muse.**


	18. Painful Memories

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 18**

_Painful Memories_

_Dean could hear them…he groaned as he pulled his arm over his head and tried to pretend that he was still unconscious. But no dice. He was awake…and in pain. The ghost had done a real number on him at the cemetery tonight. Damn thing hadn't wanted to 'go into the light'…and it had fought damn hard to make sure that didn't happen. Dean had been digging the grave while his father had tried to keep the specter away from the site long enough for Dean to get to the coffin. Eventually he had, but not before the ghost of one Jason Jessup had appeared and managed to throw him into a large tree, his ribs cracking painfully as he slid down the rough bark. Dean hadn't even seen the root that was well above the ground, but his head had certainly felt the connection as his temple slammed into the damn thing, due to gravity…'Thank you Mr. Isaac Newton.' He thought with irritation as he struggled to sit up, the blankets falling off his chest only to pool at his hips. Dean waited for the dizziness to pass before attempting to climb to his unsteady feet. And then he heard the men in the other room again..._

_"Dad, this is hardly the first time that you've returned 'fine' and Dean comes back all beat to hell! What the hell do you do? Just throw your son in front of you like a human shield?" Sam's voice was rough with emotion, anger being the most prevalent one. Dean cringed at the mental picture that Sam was painting as he argued with their father in the other room._

_"What? Sam you have no idea what you're talking about! This is a dangerous gig, you _know_ that! Dean made a mistake tonight, that's why he's lying in the other room with a broken rib and a concussion." John roared back his youngest son. Dean's eyes narrowed slightly at that…he hadn't made a mistake. He'd done exactly what he was supposed to do. He'd tracked the spirit, learned its history…which had been interesting to say the least. This particular ghost was from the civil war era…and it was pissed that the cemetery where it was buried was being desecrated by some idiot teenagers. So, said spirit was killing people that came to visit the grave after dark…assuming that they were there to destroy his final resting place. 'Ghosts didn't need a great reason to kill, particularly vengeful spirits'…once they were mad, it was just what they did._

_Dean heard Sam shift his weight in the other room and then the squeak of a chair as he sank into it at the table. "Dad, he gets hurt almost every time you two go out…come on…that can't be normal. Not even for hunters…funny thing is…he doesn't seem to get hurt when I'm there. So what the hell happens when I'm not?" Sam said in a slightly more civil tone._

_Dean felt his heart drop at that…Sam thought that he wasn't capable? When had that happened? As far as Dean had known, Sam still thought that he was a 'superhero'…apparently he'd been wrong. Sam didn't think that anymore...in fact, Sam thought that he couldn't even take care of himself…Dean felt his anger start to roll through his belly at that realization. This job was dangerous! They both knew that…and yeah, he'd gotten hurt on the last couple of hunts…but that was just because they'd been up against some really bad mother freaking monsters…not because he was weak…or because he didn't know how to do his damn job. 'What the hell Sam?' he thought in irritation. His head was still swimming slightly and he could feel the slight touch of nausea that was pitching back and forth in his stomach as he shifted his head from right to left and debated on walking out and entering this conversation. What he heard next stopped him cold._

_"Dad, I'm leaving." Sam said evenly. He'd been debated for the last six months. The letter came from Stanford and he'd been accepted into the school on a full-ride scholarship…and he was taking it. He hadn't talked with Dean yet, because he knew that his brother would be devastated to learn that he was going away. But this type of thing…Dad dragging Dean in unconscious and bloody…Sam couldn't deal with it anymore. His heart couldn't take seeing his big brother in that condition anymore. When was 'it' going to happen? The night that their father drags in the dead body of his older brother…because Sam just couldn't face that that was where this was eventually heading. He was going to lose his brother…it was just a matter of when and to what. "I was accepted into Stanford University on a full-ride…and I'm going." Sam continued simply._

_Dean sank slowly back onto the bed, his left hand coming to cradle his ribs as he struggled to think around the loud beating of his heart. 'Sam was leaving?' All of the sudden he couldn't breathe and he felt the painful pants start as he tried to consciously slow down his breathing…but the world was changing…his world was changing. Sam was leaving him…for some version of a normal apple-pie life that Dean couldn't be a part of. He felt the emotional pain slice through him as that hit home. It wasn't that he didn't want Sam to be safe…and he would be…apparently that would happen at school. But Dean also couldn't keep an eye on him there…fuglies could get to Sam...and Dean wouldn't know until he got some call from the police, telling him his brother had been ripped apart by 'something'. He closed his eyes in sadness, only to have them flying open again as he heard a crash on the other side of the door. He pushed painfully to his feet and stumbled the few steps to the door and flung it open._

_Sam was lying on the floor, the chair he'd been sitting in had toppled over backwards…and he was holding his chin and staring at their father. Rage and hurt were equally present in his flashing blue-green eyes as he looked up at John…the betrayal that was reflected out his expressive gaze made Dean cringe._

_"You're not leaving Sam! You're staying here with me and Dean! That's an order!" John screamed at his son's prone form. _

_Dean inhaled as he saw Sam's face shift from betrayed to determined… 'Uh-oh'. He watched as his brother hauled his lengthy frame up and to his feet and then his eyes finally captured Dean's own emerald gaze...and he apologized with his eyes for waking Dean up…and for what he was going to do next._

_"I am leaving dad…you lost the right to order me around when I turned eighteen." Sam's voice was deadly calm and even as he 'informed' his father that this wasn't his decision. He shifted his eyes to his older brothers and they softened marginally when he realized that Dean had heard 'everything'. _

_John glared at Sam, not turning to see Dean standing hunched in the doorway of the room. "If you leave, don't you ever come back!" John yelled as Sam started gathering together his few possessions. Dean moved into the room now, his arm still wrapped protectively around his ribcage and his eyes glassy that were still blown-wide from the concussion, following his little brother's movements. He was looking sadly to where his brother continued to pack his things and his father stood in stony silence in the kitchen area._

_"Dad…come on…" he started as his father turned and threw the glare in his direction instead of Sam's._

_"No Dean. He's made his choice. He can live with the consequences of that decision." John growled before pushing past Dean, stalking into the bedroom area and then slamming the door shut behind him. _

_Dean gasped as pain shot through his body at the awkward movement as his father shoved past him. Sam's eyes shot up to his…and he was biting his lower lip. 'He's debating on coming over to see if I'm okay.' Dean thought silently. He tried to smile at Sam to show him that he was fine…but it came out more like a watered down version of a grimace instead. Sam inhaled and stood up to walk over to his injured brother._

_"You okay Dean?" he asked quietly as he helped Dean sink onto the couch. Dean wanted to yell that 'no' he wasn't okay…'You're leaving me…so NO I'm definitely not okay!'. Instead he settled for a small nod and quickly closed his eyes, so Sam wouldn't be able to see if he was lying or not. He really needed to get better at hiding his emotions from his kid brother…_

_"I'm fine Sam." He lied easily. "So…Stanford huh?" _

_Sam chuckled without any humor and nodded, reaching up to run long fingers through too long brown hair. "Yeah…crazy right…?" he finished as he looked at his brother for support._

_Dean saw the 'need' for his support of Sam's decision reflected out his worried blue-green orbs as he looked at his 'hero'…his older brother for that support. Dean felt something crack inside himself as he steeled his expression and turned back to look Sam directly in the eyes. _

_"No Sammy…that's not crazy. It's what you've always wanted…a normal life. I just never thought that you'd have a shot at it." He chuckled low in his throat, the humor of the situation completely void in the action. "If this is what you want…Is it Sam? Is this what you really want?" Dean couldn't help but ask as he stared at Sam._

_Sam looked away and then nodded. "Yeah Dean. This is really what I want." Sam brought his gaze back to his brother's green eyes and he read the silently supportive look in them. But there was something else…something that Sam couldn't quite read…'damn-it Dean, you're getting good at hiding things from me.' He thought as an idea occurred to him. "You could always come with me Dean…? There's a college not far from Stanford where you could take classes…mechanics training type of thing…?" Sam had looked to see if there was a place for Dean before applying to the Ivy-League school in his junior year. He'd been ecstatic when he'd found a great trade-type school for Dean…he just hadn't known how to bring it up._

_Dean exhaled and then groaned as his ribs twinged and his head spun a little in dizziness. "Sam….I can't leave dad. He needs me." Dean said quietly. He couldn't look at Sam as he crushed his little brother's hopes. He saw Sam stiffen out of the corner of his eye and then the small intake of breath as Sam straightened his spine and nodded. _

_"Fine Dean." He said coldly as he stood up and grabbed his bag off the floor. Sam turned to look at Dean, the sadness reflecting in his face as he nodded again and headed to the door of the motel room. "Be safe Dean." He said as he opened the door and walked out…leaving Dean sitting on the couch looking for all the world like he'd just lost his mother again…anguish washing through him in ways that he couldn't even identify. The door clicked closed and he felt the first tear slip from the corners of his eyes._

_"You too…Sammy." Dean whispered as he heard the gulped air and hitched breathing of his little brother on the other side of the closed door. Dean wanted to go to him…to hug Sam and tell him that it was okay…that 'he'd' be okay. But he was frozen to the couch, his muscles refusing to budge as the sadness tore through him._

_Sam waited for five full minutes on the other side of that wooded barricade…he waited for Dean to come and hug him…to tell him that he wasn't making a bad decision. That he could make it in the real world…that Sam could have 'normal'. But Dean never opened the door and Sam felt the emotions bubble to the surface. He gulped in air as he pulled his wallet from his pocket and removed the open-ended bus ticket that he'd bought months ago. The tears welling in his eyes made it hard to read the small typed writing of the scheduled departures for California…but he managed. He brushed the emotions from his watery-eyes as he started walking away. Away from hunting…away from the blood and the danger…away from Dean. _

Dean felt the pain of the dream all the way to his core…that moment when Sam had left him. He struggled through the heat that was radiating off his body as he tried to reach around and shift himself on the bed, his legs flopping a bit as he did. Pain flashed through his chest and he hissed as his knuckles protested the movement. He looked around the room and his eyes fell on the sleeping form of his little brother in the other bed…the one nearest the door, he noted with a small smile. Sam was trying to protect him. He gulped down the lump that formed in his throat at the action and laid back against the pillows as the cold sweat dripped down the sides of his head only to soak into the white cotton of the pillowcase.

Sam hadn't left him…he'd come back for him and he'd stayed even though Dean had gotten hurt…again. He hoped that this meant that they were going to hunt together now…that no matter how angry Sam got that he still got hurt on hunts…that he'd stay with Dean…even after this was all over.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _I know I said they'd be back on the road…and they will. But this chapter begged to be written, explaining Sam's decision to leave and how Dean had handled that. Next chapter though…the open road and the hunt continues._

**Please review: It's all I ask in return for writing. Let me know what you thought.**


	19. Truly Evil or Just Possessed

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 19**

_Truly Evil or Just Possessed_

Sam heard Dean moan from the other bed and he was immediately on his feet and shuffling between them. The room was stuffy and there was the distinct smell that accompanied the 'sick' as he rubbed his eyes in order to focus them. "Dean?" He asked quietly as he flipped on the small bedside lamp. Their room was flooded in warm yellow light that was just bright enough for Sam to make out his brother's form in the other bed. Dean's face was flushed red and he was sweating…_Great. Fever._ Sam thought immediately as he sighed and walked into the bathroom, grabbing a cool cloth and the Tylenol from the counter. He also took the time and filled a glass with water before making his way back to his feverish older brother. He carefully sat down next to Dean and gently shook his shoulder. Even though Dean was injured…he could still knock the crap out of Sam if he was surprised…and that was not something that Sam wanted to deal with at the moment. He was careful of the injuries as he tried to wake up his brother and he was pleased when he was rewarded with glassy green eyes a moment later.

"Sam? Everything okay?" Dean asked as he struggled to push himself upright…hissing in pain as his injuries protested the moment. His voice was tight and slightly slurred…but at least it was a little stronger than it had been earlier. Sam raised his eyebrows at his brother a smile pulling at his lips as he nodded and then reached for the water and the two white pills.

"You're running a fever Dean. Think you can swallow these? They'll help." Sam said he dropped the two pills into Dean's opened palm as he nodded. The white bandages that were wrapped around his hands making Sam wince inwardly as he saw the red staining the top of Dean's hands. He watched as Dean popped the medicine into his mouth and then held out his hand for the water…which Sam instantly held up for him. Dean swallowed and then leaned back against the pillows, handing the glass back to Sam before settling again into the rough cotton of the motel sheets, his eyes slipping open and closed in a sluggish manner. "You should get some more sleep Dean." Sam said as he stood up and started to move away from the bed. He was surprised when the bandaged hand of his brother shot out and stopped him. Dean's grip was stronger than he would have thought possible, based on the injuries that his brother had sustained to the limbs.

"Thanks Sammy…" Dean said. His eyes sincere and his face open at the moment.

"It was just pain meds Dean…" Sam said around a chuckle. But he stopped when he saw the serious look that washed across Dean's face.

"No…I meant 'thanks' for coming for…me." He said quietly. Dean couldn't have really thought that Sam would leave his ass there…? Could he…?

Sam stared at his 'tough as nails' older brother in disbelief. In all the years that they'd been hunting…Dean had never thanked him for saving him. He figured that was because Dean had always known that Sam would come for him. Guilt washed through Sam as he thought of the one time that he hadn't…the one time, the first time…that Sam hadn't come looking for Dean. The night that he'd been injured in that cabin…and all the days after that…when their father had taken his own frustrations out on the man lying in the bed in front of him. Sam bit at his lower lip before answering. "I'll always come for you Dean." He whispered as he watched Dean's eyelids flutter and then fall shut as he slipped off into sleep.

Sam exhaled and thrust his hands through his hair…how was he going to get past this guilt? He'd spent his life knowing that Dean would be there for whatever he needed…and the one time that his brother had _actually_ needed _him_…he'd failed to be there. He furrowed his eyebrows together and walked over to the other bed, sinking into the still slightly warm sheets. His gaze never leaving the sleeping form of his brother…whatever it takes…_we're fixing this Dean._

XXXX

Dean felt the warm light play across his eyelids, before he decided that he'd slept enough and pulled them open. The room was just getting light…so that meant that it was still pretty early. He turned his head and glanced at the small digital clock on the nightstand… 6:34am. His green eyes flickered to the still sleeping form of his brother. Sam's mouth was hanging open and there was a tiny noise erupting from his throat…_snoring…Sam's snoring._ He thought. Sam only snored when he was sick, hurt…or incredibly tired. Dean decided that he wasn't going to wake up Sam, just so he could use the bathroom. He looked at his wheel chair, it was parked near the end of his bed and sighed inwardly, since that meant that he would have to haul his sore body to the end and then shift himself into the chair. _Oh well, it's not the first time that I've done this._ He thought as he started to move his arms, his knuckles crackled with pain as the scabs puckered and then split with the pressure. Dean bit his lip and pushed himself upright and then shifted his weight so that he could pull himself down the bed.

His useless legs folding over themselves as he managed to get himself positioned. He reached out with his left hand and caught the handle of the chair, he carefully levered himself over into it and settled against the back as he waited for the pain to pass. Or at least diminish to a more manageable level…which it did…finally. He reached down and rolled himself to the bathroom.

Once he was finished, Dean grabbed the bottle of pain meds and popped some more of the small white pills and then rolled over to the where the motel's small coffee maker was situated. He managed to get everything into the little coffee maker and then he settled in at the table, opening the laptop to do some research while he waited for the coffee. The first thing that he decided to look up was that crazy spell thing that Bobby had been talking about…the two souls thing. He narrowed his eyes at the thought of being _used_ like that…for evil. And even worse…they wanted to _turn_ Sam into something that he definitely wasn't and that was _evil._ _Well, that's not gonna happen on my watch._ He thought as he read the information on the net. He heard the coffee beep and he sighed as he rolled away from the table and over to the counter where the black liquid waited for him. He poured a mug full and turned back to the table, he was surprised by the figure of his little brother leaning over the laptop and reading what he'd been researching. Sam's hair was messy and he looked exhausted, but he was awake and engaged in what Dean had been doing.

_Damn, that kid moves silently._ He thought to himself as he rolled back and poured another mug of coffee, before saying something to Sam. "Hey, coffee's on man." He said as he slid the mug across the counter to his brother. Sam looked up and smiled as he crossed the few feet and grabbed the mug, he was moving around the counter looking for the sugar and cream almost immediately. _That_ made Dean chuckle, Sam never could take his coffee black. "It's in the cupboard Sam." He said as he took a drink of his own very black drink.

Sam glanced up at him and smiled at the amusement he read in his brother's sparkling green eyes. Dean still looked a little flushed from the fever, but he also looked better. His hands had some red on them where the knuckles had bled from the movement. But his legs looked pretty good, although Sam knew that he would need to change the bandages on all of the wounds before they could leave this motel and move on. He walked back over and sank down into a chair where he could still see the computer screen. "So…did you find anything useful?" he asked as he sipped at his 'girlified' cup of coffee.

Dean looked over at him and inhaled deeply before answering. "Yes…and no." Sam raised one eyebrow at him, as though to say 'What the hell Dean?' "I think that this spell that Bobby was talking about…it actually exists. And that these bastards have been planning this for a long time." Dean took another deep breath before continuing. "And I think that Dad was possessed by these demons…years ago." He almost chocked on the last part…but it was the only thing that made sense. John's personality change had happened pretty much over night. So the fact that he couldn't even remember the last several years…well it wasn't that far of a stretch. Sam was staring at Dean, wide eyed and he could almost see his little brother's hamster going into overdrive as he reasoned his way through that last thought.

"So…he gets possessed and then what…? They come after you…why Dean? That's the part that's bothering me…why did they come after you, through dad?" Sam's face was confused as he looked from the computer to his brother and then back again. "I mean…I thought that anything like that would mean that dad had to be running the show. Arrangements with demons and stuff…not something that they can _make _a body do…at least not without the consent of the host-soul."

It was Dean's turn to stare at his brother in wide-eyed surprise…because unfortunately Sam was absolutely right. The only way to 'make a deal' was with one's own soul…so if their dad had been possessed he had agreed to it…at least initially. Dean felt his stomach flip at that thought…their father had agreed to this…because while a demon could possess a body without consent…they couldn't make the interior soul 'make a deal'…that had to come about with the use of free-will. A thought flashed through his head and had him gasping for air a moment later as his chest seized…_what if they were trying to get him out of the way so they could get to Sam…and he wouldn't be able to protect him…_Dean coughed as he struggled to pull air into his lungs. His chest burned and his shoulder flared in agony as he nearly doubled over with pain and realization. The pain would have been easier to deal with than the knowledge that their father had been 'turned'.

"Dean?!" Sam cried as he lurched to his feet and knelt in front of his brother's doubled-over body. He gently placed his hands on Dean's knees to ensure that he didn't fall forward out his chair as he struggled through the spasm. "You okay?" Sam asked after a minute when Dean's coughing subsided and the tears that were streaming down his face from the intensity of the wracking coughs subsided to merely tracks and not gushing torrents.

A part of him couldn't believe it…his father really was a monster. He had really traded Dean for Sam…at least he'd arranged for the possession and then….maybe he didn't like the way that things had gone…and he'd wanted to do it. Dean's stomach twisted and turned with the realization that they couldn't trust their own father. No matter what he was saying at this moment…at one point he'd agreed to this. "Sam…we can't trust dad." Dean said in a raspy voice. His eyes flickering up to his little brother's concerned blue-green gaze.

Sam licked his lips and nodded as he sat back on his heels and stared at Dean for several more moments before hauling himself to his feet. "Shit Dean…this is…damn-it...!" Sam swore as he thrust his long fingers through his messy hair and paced back and forth across the small room. "What are we gonna do here Dean?" he asked.

Dean inhaled deeply and leaned forward slightly in his chair…his elbows resting on the armrests of his 'ride'. "First…we don't panic Sam." He smiled and looked pointedly at his brother before continuing. "Second…we call Bobby…and we tell him _everything_." Dean's tone was as even as could be expected and he was trying to remain strong and steady for his baby brother.

Sam furrowed his forehead as he looked down and then back at Dean and nodded. "I think that's our best bet too. He might have a suggestion for us about how to track these demons and the bastards that are working with them." Sam was quiet for a moment before he coughed and then continued. "As long as we stay away from Chicago…I'm in…for whatever Dean." He blew out the breath he'd been holding when his older brother nodded immediately in agreement.

"Sam, I have no intention of dying on you…so I agree…_no_ Chicago…not a problem on my end. But we will need to find another way to track that coven. Because I still have every intention of fixing whatever the hell those bastards did to me that night." His eyes were sincere and honest as he looked into the supportive gaze of his little brother.

XXXX

The call to Bobby went pretty much as expected. The old hunter didn't have any clue that John had been possessed or that he'd traded with the demons. But he was angry as a hornet's nest when Sam had explained what they suspected had happened. The older hunter told them that he'd be calling in some favors from other hunters and that he'd be in touch shortly with some _useful_ information. He also told them to get the hell out of that motel and away from their father…and do that NOW!

Dean couldn't have agreed more. He wanted Sam away from their father; the crap that he'd done to Dean…well Dean could handle that. But he couldn't handle it if John managed to hurt Sam. So they'd packed up and he'd argued with his little brother about re-dressing his wounds. That could wait until they were in a safer city, one that their father didn't know about and couldn't track them to. That hadn't been a fun argument…Sam had been stubborn about wanting to help Dean first. But, Dean was the older brother after all…and he'd pulled that card out of the deck and overruled Sam. So now they'd been on the road for two hours and Sam was staring out the front window, his demeanor completely awash with guilt as he stared at the open highway.

Dean rolled his eyes and exhaled loud enough to get Sam's attention. "Sammy…stop." He said quietly as he shifted so that he could look at his brother. "None of this…I repeat…none of this is your fault." He narrowed his eyes and looked down for a moment before continuing. "Sam…dad did this…to me…to you…and we may never know why. But I swear to God, that me and you…we're making it out of this shit storm that he created. I refuse to believe that you and I have to be casualties of a war that we never should have been a part of." Sam glanced over at him and smiled slightly.

"Dean I just want things to go back to normal." Sam's patented puppy eyes were in full effect as he tried to look away from his injured brother...and he wasn't even thinking about it.

"I know you do Sammy…but I don't think that is going to happen…at least not anytime soon. Think you can live with that?" Dean struggled to finish that last part, because he wasn't really sure that wanted an answer to that question.

Sam snorted and then shook his head as he looked back at his brother. "Yeah…at least for a while." He smiled and then turned back toward the road, listening to Dean chuckle slightly from the passenger seat. "Hey, how's your wounds? Need anything?"

Dean looked down at his hands, they were in desperate need of a bandage change and his legs could really use the same…but he wasn't sure if they should stop yet. They hadn't been on the road for more than a few hours and their father could track them pretty easily at this point. "Na…I think I'm okay for a bit longer. We can worry about those when we stop for the night." He turned back toward the window and watched the trees fly by as his baby carried them further and further from their only living relative…and he'd never been happier that it was just the two of them. Dean knew that he could trust Sam…always.

Dean's cell rang; he looked at the caller ID, and was relieved to see Bobby's number. There was a part of him that was pretty certain that they were going to run into their father again…but neither of them was ready for that at this particular juncture. "Hey Bobby, what's up?" Dean asked as he flipped open the phone and looked at Sam briefly.

"Dean…I got some news…and you boys aren't gonna like it." Bobby's voice was tight with stress and that was not a normal reaction to bad news. Bobby generally took everything in stride…he didn't let things get to him.

Dean's heart started to beat faster and he reached up and ran his bandage hand through his blonde hair. "Okay…whatever it is…just spit it out Bobby." That had Sam casting worried eyes in his direction and he mouthed 'What?' at his brother. Dean shook his head and held up one hand as he tried to listen to what the old hunter was saying on the other end of the line. His eye's widened even further and his face lost what little color it had as he turned surprised and somewhat panicked green eyes in his brother's direction. "Holy shit Bobby…" Dean said quickly and shook his head in disbelief.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Big reveal in the next chapter…giving Dean and Sam a shot at finding out how to fix this whole mess, but the solution may be more than either boy is willing to pay. _

**Please Review: I would appreciate any feedback…that way I know you guys are still reading this.**


	20. A Willing Sacrifice

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 20**

_A Willing Sacrifice_

Sam shot a confused look in his brother's direction as he listened to the second hand conversation. Dean wasn't really prone to outbursts like that, so whatever Bobby had told him…it'd surprised the crap out his older brother…and that never boded well for _either _of them. 'What?' he mouthed when Dean's green eyes flickered up and met his worried gaze. Dean shook his head and head up his hand while he listened to the rest of what the older hunter had to say. And he wasn't liking it…there really wasn't a way around what the damn demons had done to him…not without the completion of the spell. All would revert to its previous state just before the actual sacrifice of the 'victim'…or _him _as the victim was also known as. He looked over at Sam and the mounting worry he saw on his brother's expressive face didn't make him feel any better. Sam would never agree to this…he would never go along with the idea of turning Dean over to the witches and then allow himself to be part of the actual ceremony…and that was if they could find the bastards in the first place.

But the problem was…that it was this or _nothing_. There was no other way to reverse what those bastards had done to him…what his father had done to him. His heart clenched painfully as his thoughts drifted momentarily to his dad…he'd already made _his_ decision. John certainly was willing to sacrifice his boys for the revenge he so badly wanted….particularly Dean…that thought hurt more than almost anything else…that their father would willingly let Dean go to hell…for his own ends. Reasons that Dean didn't understand and would probably never even know.

"Dean! Are you even listening to me boy?" Bobby shouted through the phone. Dean's shoulder jumped at the sudden increase in volume and swallowed his feelings as he turned his attention back to the man on the phone. The fingers of his other hand twisting into his jeans as his mind flitted from thought to thought.

"Yeah…yeah Bobby I'm listening. Don't get your panties in a bunch." Dean added as he tried to lighten the situation. He heard the old man sigh loudly, like it was such a concession for him to let that type of comment go.

"I don't wear panties kid…more of boxer type of guy." Bobby answer gruffly, Dean groaned at unfortunate mental image that elicited from his over active brain. "Now, I want you to hand the phone to that little brother of yours so that _I_ can tell him about this…because I don't think that you will." The older man inhaled slowly before Dean could blow up at him over the phone. "Look Dean, I get it…it would be to protect him from having to make this type of decision. But he deserves to know the truth…and he needs to hear it from someone other than you." Bobby's voice softened as he tried to explain his reasoning to the middle Winchester, before the kid could have a 'hissy-fit' over the phone.

Dean furrowed his eyebrows and ran his left hand through his blonde spiky hair in frustration as he considered what the other man was saying. He knew that Bobby was right…Sam deserved the truth, but it was his _job_ to protect Sam from this type of crap _damn-it!_ And he was doing a piss poor job of that lately. "Fine." He grumbled as he handed the phone to a surprised Sam. "You should probably pull over for this Sammy." Dean added as he dropped the phone into Sam's out-stretched hand.

"Hang on Bobby." Sam said as he took his brothers advice and pulled off to the side of the road…because whatever the older hunter had told Dean…it had put _that_ look on his brother's face…and that was never a good thing…or healthy. "What's going on Bobby?" he said as he turned off the car and leaned against the back of the bench seat. The color drained from Sam's face a moment later and he threw a furious glance in Dean's direction. "There has to be another way…." He was cut off by something the other man said and his face went stony as he listened to the rest of the explanation. His cheek jumping with the tension of his teeth as they were clenching and unclenching and he tried to wrap his head around this _plan._ If that's what they could call 'using his brother as bait to lure the witches from hiding and then agreeing to sacrifice _said_ brother in a ritual, only to _change his mind_ at the last minute…after they'd healed Dean and were ready to send his older brother's ass directly to hell, _do not pass go, do not collect $200.00_…for eternity'. Because that was the worst plan that he'd ever heard…_like ever!_

"Bobby, there are too many variables…we could lose Dean too easily with this." He said quietly as he refused to look at his brother as he talked to the older hunter. He heard the loud cough from the passenger seat, alerting him that Dean didn't appreciate being talked about like he wasn't in the car too. "Shh." Sam said as he shot his brother's irritated face a glance before quickly turning his attention back to the man on the phone. "This isn't an option Bobby…we have to find a safer way." Sam said the last part in a strong steady voice that told Dean that he wasn't changing his mind anytime soon and they would need to continue searching…or he would have to _convince _Sam that this was the _only_ course of action they had left. This one act would restore the use of his legs and get the demons off Sam's and his trail…for good. And if not…well then at least he'd have the satisfaction that Sam was safe, because without Dean…the witches couldn't complete the ritual…so either way it was a win/win as far as Dean was concerned.

He also understood that Sam wouldn't feel that same way…that he wouldn't be willing to take the risk…at least not yet. But Dean would get him there…he just needed time. And that was something that they had precious little of at the moment.

Dean watched as Sam huffed and clicked the phone shut and then swore as he pounded his fist against the steering wheel of the car. "Hey! Don't take it out on baby! She's got nothing to do with this man." Dean cried as he stared daggers at his brother for the offensive action to his precious car. Sam shrugged non-commitally and mumbled a quick 'Sorry.' And then he was opening his door and climbing out of the car, he walked to the front of the Impala and leaned against the hood for a moment…he just needed a moment…to clear his head. Because Bobby had just asked him to be okay with potentially sending Dean to _Hell…_not the idea of hell, but the actual place with demons and brimstone all surrounded in fire…and Sam sooooo wasn't okay with that.

Dean watched with worried eyes as Sam just 'sat' there…leaning against the hot metal of the Chevy. His hands resting on his knees as he leaned forward and tried to collect his thoughts. Dean knew this tactic…he'd seen Sam employ it over the years when he didn't want to talk about something and he needed some time to 'process'. But that didn't make watching his little brother struggle with the enormity of this decision any easier. Dean knew that this had to be Sam's decision, as much as he would like to take that pressure off his little brother's shoulders…if things went South, and Dean wasn't 'rescued' then Sam would have to live with that guilt. He sighed as he watched Sam shift his weight and finally pull himself to his long legs and walk slowly back to the driver's door. He crawled inside the car, settling his weight before finally turning to look Dean full in the face, his blue-green eyes heavy with the weight of this choice.

"Before I'll ever consider this…we have to exhaust all other avenues Dean…because I can't stand the thought of losing you…" The last part came out in a whisper before Sam looked away and started the engine. He put the car in drive and pulled back out onto the highway, the blacktop flying beneath the powerful muscle car as it ate up the miles.

Dean didn't have an answer to that…he knew that if there had been _any_ other option Bobby would have already found it…that was what he did…research through the piles and piles of musty old books that he had strewn across his old house. But even _he_ hadn't been able to find a damn thing that would help either Sam or Dean out of this mess that their father had gotten them into. The only thing that Dean knew was that whatever the cost was…he wasn't going to lose Sam over this. Not to something evil and certainly not to their father's piss-poor planning.

XXXX

Dean was rattled awake by the wheels of the car as it came to a stop…he glanced tiredly out the passenger window to see that Sam had decided to stop for the night. The _Evergreen Motel_ was pretty the same as their usual haunts. But the parking lot of this place wasn't even paved, it was just gravel over dirt, which explained the bumping awakening. He sighed and ran his fingers over his weary eyes and then turned to look at Sam.

His brother was just sitting there…staring out the dark window into the distance. It was pretty obvious to Dean that he was _thinking_ and that he wasn't paying much attention to what was going on inside the car. "Earth to Sam…you turning the car off or what?" Dean said in amusement when Sam jumped at the sound of his gravelly voice breaking the silence inside the Impala.

Sam chuckled at his own reaction and then nodded with a slight smile as he turned the ignition off. "Sorry…just got caught up thinking."

Dean shook his head with a slight smile as he watched Sam. "I knew that brainiac…but we were wasting gas and that stuff ain't cheap." He narrowed his eyes and the smile slipped from his lips as he continued to watch his little brother. "Sam…what's going on in that giant brain of yours?" He leaned down and shifted his legs so he was facing Sam, _all the better to watch you Sammy._ He thought as Sam shot him an irritated look before sighing himself and rubbing his thighs in frustration.

"I don't want to do this Dean." There, he'd said it. _Sam didn't want to use his big brother as bait to hunt down these demons and their witchy counterparts._ He wanted Dean as far from those bastards as he could get them…and he didn't their father anywhere near either one of them. He didn't trust the man…not after what he'd learned and what he'd seen in his dreams or visions…or whatever they were calling the things now.

Dean groaned and dropped his head onto his chest in resignation. He wasn't going to push this issue with his brother. It wasn't his place to make Sam choose to _use_ him as a way to get to these asshats. But that didn't mean that he couldn't still try and convince Sam to change his mind. His head shot up and he looked Sam in the eyes before playing his last card…his _ace in the hole_. "Sammy…there isn't another way to _fix_ me…" he whispered as watched at his little brother's face shifted. Sam looked as though Dean had physically punched him in the gut.

"Dean…that's a low blow." Sam said around the lump in his throat. Because he knew that his brother was right…there wasn't another way to help him. And Dean didn't deserve to spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair.

"I know Sam…but it also happens to be true." Dean answered in a stronger voice, his green eyes never leaving his little brother's face as he studied him for his reaction. Sam's lips thinned and he looked down at his lap and his fingers twisted into the denim of his jeans as he ran through the massive amounts of knowledge that he had…looking for anyway to _argue_ with Dean's logic…_he didn't find one._

"This isn't fair Dean…" Sam whispered, looking up at Dean through the fringe of his long bangs. His ocean colored eyes glistening in the moonlight with the unshed tears and the one overhead parking lot light illuminating his wounded gaze.

"I know it isn't…but since when have our lives been fair Sam?"

"For the record…I really hate this." Sam huffed as he opened the door and climbed out of the car. He walked to the trunk and pulled out Dean's wheelchair, as he was setting it on the ground he felt the first wave of pain crash through his skull…sending him to his knees as he dropped the chair and his hands flew to his head; images flashing through his head faster than he could comprehend them.

Dean heard the crash of the chair as it hit the gravel and the back of the car; he twisted his upper body, looking for the tall frame of his brother behind him. When he didn't immediately see Sam, his fear started to rise steadily in his chest. "Sammy?!" He called out as he continued to try and maneuver his body so that he could see what the hell had happened to his little brother.

"Arrgghh…"

That was the only sound that Dean heard and it had him scrambling around and throwing open the door to the passenger side as he gritted his teeth against the pain and leaned out, placing his palms flat on the dirt and pulling his body. He cried out in pain as his legs folding over each other and gravity took them to the ground, his knuckles burning with pain as he ignored the agony shooting through his shoulder and pulled his body across the dirt toward the back of the car. He saw Sam's knees almost immediately, his brother was hunched over them, his palms flat against his skull and his eyes squeezed shut as tears poured through clenched eyelids.

"SAM!" Dean yelled as he slowly closed the distance between them. His bit his through lower lip on accident as he pulled himself the last few feet so that he was directly in front of Sam, reaching up and placing one hand on his little brother's shoulder. "Sam… come on man…you're really scaring me here." He said as he leaned down a little, so that he could look up into the pained face in front of him.

Sam just kept shaking head and calling Dean's name…he didn't react to the fact that his brother was sitting right in front of him. Dean watched the fear and anguish washing through his brother in waves…and was honestly scared to ask Sam what this vision had been of…because he wasn't really sure he wanted to know.

TBC…

**Author's Note: **_So…sorry another 'sorta' cliffy here. But there are only a few more chapters and then this story will be done and I wanted to dive right into the confrontation in the next chapter…after I reveal what Sam saw._

**Please Review: The more I get the faster I'll post…greedy I know. J**


	21. Sams Revelation about Dean

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 21**

_Sam's Revelation about Dean_

_Sam watched from a distance as the ritual was completed, he saw his brother lying quietly on the large stone alter table. Dean was wearing only a pair of jeans and nothing else, his bare chest was covered in black sigils drawn in charcoal and his feet were stretched out and bare of any socks or shoes. His eyelids were closed and he was breathing in steady even breaths…but it was the lifeless look to his body that scared Sam. The witch placed a dagger just above Dean's heart and traced a pattern in blood into the pale skin. A bright green glowing light started at Dean's toes and worked its way up through his legs, Sam watched with rapt attention as Dean's leg muscles filled out and were repaired of the atrophy that had happened over the last year and his back arched upwards as the pale green light spun under his lower back and then twisted like a snake around his torso. _

_Sam couldn't seem to pull his eyes from the sight of the healing energies as they repaired what was broken over a year ago. Dean's face never changed, he didn't even seem to be aware of what was happening on any significant level…at least not that Sam could see. But the witch seemed pleased with his work and eventually stopped tracing the blood sigils into Dean's now bloody chest and abdomen. The small green lights continued to wash up over the sigils healing them as well, leaving only the scars of the artwork and not the actual wounds inflicted by the knife itself. The pain lashed through Sam's head as he continued to watch the ritual, and then his breathing stuttered as he saw himself walk up next to Dean…he was carrying an odd curved blade, a dragon on one end and a double edged bronze blade curving around the dragon creating a circular tail…it was beautiful…intoxicating to look at…and deadly. Sam swallowed hard as he saw himself step forward, the blade positioned above his brother's heart. _

_He could see the fear and the anticipation on his own face as his eyes darted between the witch and something in the corner of the room. Sam squinted as he tried to see what was hiding in the shadows…eventually he was able to make out another figure… 'Oh Hell….' He thought as he recognized his father's shadow. What was John doing there…? He watched as his father rushed from the darkened corner and tackled the witch, his own curved blade sinking deep into the black heart of the man as he screamed his denial on his dying breath. _

_Sam's blade sank into the alter, so close to Dean's chest that Sam winced from where he was frozen…the alter cracked beneath the curved dragon and Dean moaned as his eyelids fluttered and Sam finally saw the brilliant green of his brother's eyes peek through. "Sammy…?" The deep gravelly voice penetrated the stillness in Sam's heart and he finally smiled as he looked down at his brother. He never saw the demon that was sneaking up behind him…nor did he see his father's eyes go wide as just as he screamed a warning. _

_"SAM!" Dean's eyes flickered to the man with the yellow eyes as he slipped up behind his little brother and the smile that slipped across his lips as he held up a blade not that dissimilar to the one that Sam held. "No!" John cried as he rushed forward…his fingers grasping the shoulder of the demon just as the blade reached Sam's exposed neck…_

XXXX

Sam's head snapped up and his eyes opened slowly as he tried to focus around the pain that was still pulsating through his skull. His own pained expression was immediately met by the worried green eyes of his older brother. _Wait, how did he get to the back of the…Oh…he must have crawled._ Sam realized as he felt the guilt washing through his system as he finally understood just how badly he must have scared his brother to cause him to drag his injured body across the gravel to check on him. Sometimes the things that Dean was willing to do for him...well they scared the shit out of Sam.

"I'm okay Dean…it was a dream...or a vision…whatever they are..." He stammered as he sat up straighter and looked his worried older brother directly in the inquisitive emerald colored eyes. "Sorry…can't exactly control them."

Dean huffed and then leaned against the trunk of the car as the pain from his injuries refused to be ignored any longer. "I know that Sam…just scared me…that's all." He brushed his hand through his blonde hair and then turned to look at his exhausted looking little brother. "What did you see this time Sam?"

Sam snorted…his eyelids falling shut as he tried to think around the pounding headache. "This plan…the one Bobby called with…it'll work. But we need dad." He nearly choked on the request. Sam couldn't believe that he was saying this…but Dean needed to know and it was imperative that they find John since he seemed to be the key to Dean making in through the ritual alive and then finally being healed as well.

Dean wasn't sure that he'd heard Sam right…_find their father? But hadn't he wanted to stay away from John at all costs? _ Okay, so now Dean was really and truly confused…was their father with them…or against them? "I don't understand Sam." He said evenly as he shifted his weight to alleviate some pain in his side...exactly where his burns were starting to pull painfully against the newly healed flesh.

Sam inhaled deeply and then shifted so he was able to grab Dean's wheelchair and open it, helping his brother up off the hard cold ground. A grunt escaped his brother's lips as he settled himself into the chair and then he turned grateful eyes up at his little brother. "I know you don't Dean. Can you just trust me? We need dad for this plan to be successful…and it will be successful Dean. You will heal and the witch's responsible will die." Sam didn't want to get into it any further, because he couldn't guarantee that _he_ would make it through this scenario alive. But Dean would…and for him…that was what mattered the most. His brother deserved a chance at a normal life…or at least as normal as a Winchester could have. So the last part of that vision…well...he wouldn't exactly be sharing that with his over-protective big brother.

Dean exhaled loudly and narrowed his eyes, he knew that Sam wasn't telling him something…but he couldn't exactly beat it out of him…so he was stuck with trying to convince him to tell him. While that might not happen tonight…it by no means meant that this conversation was over. "Okay Sammy…how about we go get a room and then discuss how we go about finding dad… I also think that we should get a hold of Bobby and have him on hand to help us with this…what'cha think?"

Sam smiled slightly as he focused around the pulsating headache bouncing around inside his skull. "I think that's a good plan Dean." He placed his hands on the handles of Dean's chair and pushed him across the gravel toward the office. "Wait here Dean, I'll get us a room and be right back." He said as he disappeared inside of the room…Dean looked off into the distance as lightning caught his attention. He counted in his head as he waited for the thunder…the storm was still several miles off, but he didn't want to be sitting outside when it hit. The storms moved quickly in this part of the country…luckily so did Sam. He strolled out of the office a few moments later with a key and pushed Dean toward the left. Room 17, was just a few doors down from the managers own room. Sam pushed the key into the lock and then reached past Dean to flip on the light.

Dean managed to push himself through the door and then looked around the rustic looking little cabin type of room. The two beds were full-sized with wooden frames and patchwork quilts; there was a small television in the corner and an even smaller kitchenette opposite the beds. He and Sam had stayed in a room similar to this when their father had taken them on a hunt in Yellowstone National Forest when he was about fourteen. Some ghost of a park ranger had been terrorizing the tourists, so they'd gone to stop it. Sam had insisted on seeing the park and the refuges for the wolves and the bears…Dean shuttered as he thought of the large animals and their steely gazes as they watched the tourists every bit as closely as the tourists watched them...intelligence evident in their dark brown eyes.

"I grabbed your bag too." Sam said as he walked in, interrupting Dean's thoughts as he shut the door behind himself just as the first raindrops hit his shoulders. "That storm is moving fast Dean." He said as he dropped his bag on the bed nearest the door…Dean glared at him and he huffed and then moved his bag to the bed by the bathroom. "You know at some point I'm going to take care of you…" he mumbled.

"You already do Sammy…" Dean answered as he rifled through his bag looking for a clean pair of sweatpants and boxers. "Mind if I take a quick shower before we change my bandages?" His burns and the slices on his hands were really throbbing at this point, and he just wanted to get them under the hot water before Sammy started playing nurse.

Sam narrowed his eyes and then shook his head. He was careful not to move too much since the throbbing ache was still there behind his eyes and between his ears. The soft ringing of his cell phone caught him off guard...Sam grabbed the phone as he heard the water turn on and Dean closed the bathroom door. The water muffled the phone call as Sam answered. "Hello?"

"Sam? Is that you…" Sam's throat closed at the sound of his father's voice and he gritted his teeth as he bit back the things that he wanted to say. "You know it is…what do you want dad?" He sank onto the bed and leaned his elbows against his knees as he waited for his father to answer.

"I know where the witches are Sam…and I know how to kill them." The deep voice of his father caused Sam to close his eyes and focus on breathing deeply as he heard the thunder roll outside their room.

"A bronze dragon blade…right?" Sam said tiredly.

"How did you know that Sam?" The surprise was evident in his father's voice as it jumped an octave.

"Don't worry about that...I just do…so where do we find them?" This was all going a little too easily as far as he was concerned. How had John found them just when he'd discovered that he needed his father's help to defeat the witches and save Dean? He heard the water shut off and he shifted away from the bathroom door hoping that Dean wouldn't overhear this part of the conversation. Sam wasn't ready to tell both his father and his brother the true extent of the sacrifice needed to reverse this spell. "Dad, why? Why did you let that demon in the first time?"

"Sam…" John said evenly.

"Dad…I deserve to know…_we_ deserve to know." Sam replied crisply. He heard the bathroom door open as a ball of steam rolled out of the small room and Dean rolled his wheelchair out and over toward his bed. He glanced at Sam with the question evident on his face as he grabbed his bag and pulled out the small first aid kit he kept there.

"The demon…he promised to bring back Mary…and cure you of the demon blood Sam. But the cost...it was this ritual…"

"And Dean's life? Was that part of the cost as well dad? Were you really willing to trade your oldest son for your wife?" Sam said loudly, causing his brother to throw his eyes in Sam's direction. Concern and surprise etched into his green gaze as he stopped what he was doing to stare opening at his brother.

"No Sam…that was never part of the deal…the _life force _ that they took from Dean…it wasn't supposed to do anything more than take his ability to walk. I would never have agreed to send my own son to hell Sam…I wouldn't do that. But you and Dean...you were the only ones that could fulfill that prophecy...they whole twin parts of one soul thing..."

Sam cut off his father as his anger roared to the surface and he shot to his feet and started pacing the small room. "NO! But you were willing to relegate him to a wheelchair for the rest of his life dad…with no explanation and no help… for God's sake…who does something like that…? You took something from him that wasn't yours to take and then you just up and disappeared. What the hell? Do you really think that mom would have wanted that? That she would have forgiven you for that choice?!" He finished loudly as he glanced over sadly at the confused and heartbroken look on his brother's face...he'd pieced together the conversation. Dean knew that Sam was talking to their father…and that he'd just learned why Dean had been _sacrificed_ to the witches…and apparently he didn't approve of the reasoning behind it. "Look dad. I don't want you near him…or me. But we need your help to correct this _action_…so where do we meet to find these witches?" Sam walked over to stare out the window at the now rapidly falling rain, the lightning flashing in the distance and lighting up the stony expression on Sam's angry face. "Fine. We'll be there in two days. Call Bobby and have him meet us there too. That's not negotiable dad. See you then." Sam clicked the phone closed and used all his self-control not to throw the thing at the wall as the anger rolled through him in waves.

Dean was watching Sam from his chair. He wasn't hiding the fact that he was beyond worried or that he was in pain as he shifted in the metal chair and then swallowed loudly. "It was for mom...wasn't it...the whole demon deal...and now he has a plan?" Dean asked as he shifted his body from the chair to the bed, his torso still bare from his shower…the burns and the long slash across his chest visible even in the dim light of their room. The soft light of their room doing nothing to hide the deep chasm of guilt flooding through his eyes.

"I'm sorry, I never wanted you to hear that...and yeah Dean, he has a plan…and it'll work too. I saw that much." He licked his lower lip and then winced when he saw the split in Dean's. "You bite that tonight?" Sam's face shifted from angry to concerned as he looked at the condition of his older brother.

Dean snorted derisively. "Yeah, well just add it to the number of things I wish I didn't know at this point...at least where dad's concerned. I really don't want to talk about it...and yeah I bit it when I was hauling my sorry ass over the ground to see what was up with you." A slight laugh bubbled up as he saw the apologetic look smear its way across Sam's face. "Sam…it's fine. I'll heal. Are you okay?" He watched as his brother looked down at his overly large toes and then twisted back so he was looking Dean in the face.

Sam looked at the wounds on his brother and he felt the guilt swell again as he stood and moved to kneel in front of Dean, grabbing the first aid kit. "I'm fine Dean. Let's look at those cuts…"

Dean huffed loudly. "So…where are we going Sam?" He moved so that Sam had a better view of the wound across his chest, the stitches hadn't popped, thank god…but it still needed to be treated and then smeared in antiseptic cream.

His little brother licked his lips as he gently pulled the antiseptic wipes across Dean's flushed skin. His brother hissed at the cold liquid and the strong sting as the cut on his chest protested the use of the cleanser. "Portland. The witches are in Portland."

Dean nodded and then took a deep breath as Sam started cleaning the burn on his shoulder and looked pointedly at Dean's sweats. "Those have to come off so I can look at those burns Dean." It wasn't that he wanted to make his brother more uncomfortable, but unfortunately x-ray vision wasn't one of his weird-ass powers.

Dean narrowed his eyes and his forehead furrowed as he bit back the smart-ass remark that popped immediately into his head. It was so inappropriate and he knew that he would be telling Sam the same thing if their positions were reversed…and they had been in the past. "Fine. Just don't get jealous Sammy." He couldn't resist and was rewarded with _bitch-face _number six, that caused a genuine smile to play at the corners of his lips.

Sam groaned when he saw the burns come into view as he helped Dean pull the sweats out of the way. His brother looked distinctly uncomfortable with the fact that he was now sitting there with his pants pooled around his ankles and only his boxer-briefs offering any sort of modesty. The burns were still red and angry looking as Sam handed the ointment to his brother and let him wipe the burn cream on, Dean looked away as his little brother treated the other wounds from the hillbilly's. He wondered what the point was in what they had been doing out there. Maybe someone should have told them that there were way better things out there to hunt than regular people. Monsters and other fugly bastards that go bump-in-the-night.

Sam sat back and surveyed his handiwork as he looked up into the grateful eyes of his older brother. "Uh…thanks Sammy." Dean said as he leaned forward to pull his pants back into place. Sam helped him settle the black sweats over his lean hips and then walked to the duffle bag, pulling out a Led Zeppelin t-shirt and handing it to Dean. He immediately pulled the material over his still damp hair and grinned at Sam. "Nice choice there dude." He said as he looked down at the logo on the shirt.

Sam couldn't restrain the smile that slipped onto his face as he nodded and grabbed his own bag, heading to the bathroom to check and see how much hot water his brother had left him.

"Don't worry Sammy…I left you enough water to clean that ginormous head of yours."

Sam turned and shot Dean the middle fingered solute and then pulled the door closed as he stepped inside the small rustic room. He glanced at the shower and then smiled to himself as he realized that his brother had managed to somehow take a shower...and since there wasn't a bathtub in this room...that had to have been a real trick indeed. Dean was more ingenious than Sam had ever really given him credit for before.

XXXX

They arrived in Portland nearly two days later. The rain seemed to be following them and Dean wondered if that was a good or a bad sign... It wasn't like they had all that much good luck really…not in any form it seemed. But the trip had been relatively quick and that was a nice surprise. Another notch in their favor was that his wounds didn't seem to be infected anymore. He was healing nicely and Sam wasn't coddling him like a child at the moment…and for that, he was intensely grateful. He glanced over at the sleeping form of his larger 'little' brother and he smiled as he saw Sam's lips fall open and a soft snore escaped. Dean shook his head and pulled into the motel parking lot. Sam wouldn't tell him where they were meeting their father, but he did know that Bobby would be meeting them here later that evening.

He reached over and gently nudged Sam awake. "Hey sasquatch…we're here." Sam moaned and then his eyelids flickered open revealing extremely tired eyes. He reached up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes as he looked out at the small motel that Dean had chosen to stop at.

"Not a sasquatch…jerk." Sam protested as he sat up.

"Whatever bitch…grab my chair." Dean shot back with a grin. It was only the addition of the grin that kept Sam from saying something snarky back to his older brother.

He and Dean checked into the motel and set up their salt lines and then ordered a pizza, since neither one of them wanted to chance running into the witches and alerting them to their presence in this place. They both figured that the element of surprise was probably their only card…so they needed to hold onto that _particular card_ very tightly. Bobby called them an hour later, letting them know that he'd gotten a room a few doors down from theirs and that he would be over first thing in the morning and they could go ahead and get their plan together before they called John.

Sam and Dean watched tv that night, drinking beer and laughing at the old movies that Dean had picked on one of the limited channels that the motel offered. It was so relaxing that Dean didn't want to go to bed…but as Sam's eyes kept falling shut and knowing that the next day was going to be _life-altering_, he decided to call it a night and flipped off the small tv.

He looked over at the sleeping form of his little brother and smiled as he considered that maybe Sam would actually stay with him…when all this was done. Or maybe he could figure out a way to hunt in the same area where Sam was at…because, much to his dismay, he'd rediscovered why it was that he loved being around his younger brother. Things were just easier with Sam. And while they knew everything about each other; they were still so opposite…and yet, so much the same that it made being around him simple…and that was something that Dean hadn't had in a long time…simple.

The knock on the door several hours later woke Dean from a sound sleep and caused him to shift too quickly and some slight pain to flare in his chest as he did. He groaned as he pulled himself to his chair and then settled his legs on the metal pads and rolled to the door. He pulled it open, hiding his pistol in his lap under a bulky sweatshirt.

Bobby raised his eyebrows at Dean and laughed as he stepped across the salt line and leaned down to embrace the middle Winchester in a hug. "How you doing boy?" the older hunter asked as he released Dean and gently shut the door behind himself, when he saw that Sam wasn't awake yet. He handed Dean a cup of coffee from the tray he'd been carrying and a bag of, what Dean assumed, were donuts.

"I'm doing okay Bobby…how about you?" Dean asked as he rolled to the table and settled in to drink his coffee as he dug into the bag of pastries. He pulled out a maple covered donut and hummed his appreciation as he bit into the sweet breakfast roll. "Thanks for these." He said through a mouth-full of donut and a grin.

"Don't talk with your mouth full boy." Bobby admonished and then smiled back at the subtle wriggle of Dean's eyebrows as he 'enjoyed' the donut way more than he should be allowed to. "I'm good. I'm not really looking forward to running into your old man though…but it sounds like we _need_ him." He sighed and ran his hand over his bearded chin as he thought about the tentative phone call that he'd gotten from a worried John a couple of days ago. He hadn't wanted to answer that call, but as it turned out…it had been necessary to ensure that the boys would come out of this thing…alive. He'd gotten the lowdown on the conversation that John had had with Sam and then he'd called Sam later to verify what their father had told him. Turned out that John hadn't been lying…and that had actually surprised Bobby. Sam had explained the vision…Bobby knew there was something that Sam wasn't telling him…but he decided not to press…he'd been fully on board as long as Sam thought this was the best course of action. They decided that they would tell Dean about the plan together, since he'd already fallen asleep by the time Sam had finished with his shower and then the call from Bobby. Sam had feigned sleep after the movie…and Dean had taken the bait and gone to bed himself.

Dean looked over at the slowly moving lump of little brother in the bed and smiled, before turning back to Bobby. "I know Sam had a vision Bobby…and I know that he thinks that we can heal me without me dying as a result…but…" He sighed and ran his hand up over his face. "I think he's keeping something from me Bobby…and that has me worried."

"You're right Dean…" Sam's deep voice surprised Dean and his shoulders jumped as he spun his head around to look at Sam's worried and resigned expression. He was standing directly behind Dean…_damn that kid can move silently._ Dean thought.

"Okay…then what aren't you telling me?" He asked as his eyes flickered between Bobby and Sam.

"Well, you know that dad will be involved…"

Dean nodded silently. He didn't want to interrupt just as his brother started opening up about this particular vision. Bobby stayed silent as well as he watched the brother's try and read one another, without letting the other see what was going on. It was always interesting when he had a chance to watch these two interact…because as well as they knew one another…they sure did miss some vital 'tells'.

"Not only do you have to be involved…which you already know. But I have to agree to be the one that sacrifices you…which you also know. But in the vision, it was the addition of dad to that scenario that got you out alive…so that is the only way that this will work." Sam finished as he sank into the chair next to Dean, grabbing a cup of coffee as he did.

Dean narrowed his eyes, he couldn't have heard Sam correctly…_Did Sam just that 'he' would make it out alive? If that's true…what about Sam?_ "Sam, what about you?" Dean couldn't help but ask the questions as they popped into his head. He wasn't willing to do this if it meant that he _might_ lose Sam in the process...his legs...his ability to walk...it wasn't worth that...nothing was.

Sam swallowed quickly as he prepared to shove the biggest load of crap down Dean's throat that he'd ever had the unfortunate pleasure of shoveling. "I make it out too Dean…we all do. The only ones that die are the witches and the demons get a one ticket back to Hell." He managed to keep his gaze steady and his voice from shaking as he _bold-faced-lied_ to his brother. Well, at least he was pretty sure it was a lie…because Sam hadn't seen his own death…he'd just assumed that was what had happened next. But he sure as hell wasn't telling his over protective and hero-driven older brother that.

Dean watched for any sign that Sam was lying to him…when he didn't immediately see anything that raised a red flag he nodded and relaxed slightly. "Okay…so when are we meeting with dad?" He wasn't sure that he wanted to see John Winchester again…he still hadn't worked out how he really felt about this whole 'deal'…and he wasn't sure he was ready to deal with their father yet. But it appeared that the universe didn't really give a rats ass what Dean wanted.

Bobby spoke up before Sam had a chance to swallow his coffee. "Tonight. 8pm at the docks near the Warf."

"Okay, then I guess we use the day to get our gear together and an escape plan…just in case everything goes to shit." Dean answered as he looked at Sam and then shifted his green gaze to Bobby's intense blue eyes.

"That sounds like a plan." Bobby said.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _So they have a plan…it'll heal Dean and perhaps restore some faith in John. But as with all good plans there are always flaws…was Sam's vision finished with them escaping? Or is there something else at work here. Next chapter will have those answers._

**Please Review: They are all read and highly appreciated.**


	22. Sam Why didnt you tell Me

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 22**

_Sam, Why didn't you tell Me_

They were standing…well, Dean was sitting…and the rest of them were standing outside an old abandoned warehouse just off the waterfront in Portland. The sun was setting in a spectacular display of oranges and reds coloring a slowly darkening sky. The rain was falling in an almost mist-like manner. Not really drops but certainly enough to get you wet if you remained outside for too long. The Impala was parked up the block, so it wouldn't be quite so noticeable by the men they were here to kill.

Dean looked over at his brother, and the worried expression that seemed to be plastered onto his usually jovial face, was still there and had been since they'd left the motel for this place. _Absent since they'd left the motel and met up with their father earlier._ He thought to himself. Bobby hadn't been any keener about having John involved in this attempt to stop fate, than Dean…but Sam had overruled them all and decided they _had_ to have the man involved. Somehow he was instrumental in getting Dean out of the ritual or spell, whatever it was they were here to stop, _alive._ And if that meant that they would be able to heal the elder Winchester brother…and get the demons out of their lives…then that was what had to happen. Because the alternative was simply unthinkable.

Dean looked down at his silver pearl handled Taurus that was currently tucked down next to his hip and then his eyes were lifting to look up at his father. "So…what do I need to do?" He asked finally as he allowed his green gaze to flicker from the oldest Winchester to the youngest one. Sam's eyebrows were furrowed together, almost like he was in physical pain, as he waited quietly for an answer as well. Dean knew Sam wasn't at all happy about this _development_…but they didn't know any other way to help his brother. And unfortunately, Sam also knew that the demons weren't going to leave him and Dean alone until they dealt with the multitude of balls that their father had set into motion more than a year ago…maybe longer. But whether not they were being forced into this plan… certainly didn't mean that Sam was happy about this proposed solution…and he was going to do everything in his power to ensure that if someone had to pay a _price_ here…it wasn't going to be his brother. Dean had already paid enough for all of them…he didn't owe anything more to this crazy crusade that John had been on since the night Mary died…and eventually culminating in this meeting tonight.

XXXX

Sam stood silently in a corner, hidden by the sheer lack of light in the large room. His muscles were coiled like a cobra ready to strike and still couldn't believe that it had come to this…that _he'd_ allowed those bastards to tie his brother down…to incapacitate him and lay him out on that stone slab like a sacrificial lamb. There were candles in a multitude of colors surrounding the prostrate form of his brother. Small bones from, what Sam could only assume were other sacrifices, encircling Dean. Four witches total were surrounding the black stone alter, their hands raised as one in particular looked almost hungrily at the incapacitated man. Dean's legs were tied down…_yeah, because he couldn't move them anyways, so why waste the rope?_ Sam's head shot at him as he struggled to remain in place.

He watched as one of the witch's stepped up next to the table, he's been the one to trace the charcoal symbols onto Dean's naked chest and was now laying something that Sam couldn't quite recognize from his angled position, next to his brother. It glinted in the low light and Sam caught his breath as he bit down on his lower lip to keep from yelling out a warning to his unconscious brother. The witch was talking in a low voice to the other three, things that Sam couldn't hear…and he was sure that what they were saying was somehow very important. He strained further…hoping to catch any relevant pieces of information.

His father and Bobby had come in through separate entrances and he was praying to every god that he knew of that they wouldn't be too late to save Dean. They had figured that an attack from several points would have the most chance of success. But as he watched the witch pick up the blade he suddenly wondered if they maybe should have simply gone in using old World War I tactics…full frontal assault. They had allowed Dean to be seen and then captured…and that been some of the scariest moments in Sam's young life…watching the witch hit his brother with a spell. Dean had slumped in his chair and then slipped to the floor as his muscles gave way to inactivity.

It was currently taking every ounce of self-control at an almost cellular level within Sam's body to not rush head long into that room and simply kill the witches and save Dean. But he knew that this was the only way to trap or kill the demon and get Dean's back repaired…and then maybe…just maybe….they could move past this…move on with their lives. His worried eyes flickered as the witch started the trace the patterns into Dean's skin with the glinting dragon blade…blood running in rivulets down the sides of Dean's chest and his flanks. The witch was now chanting and the strange green light, from Sam's vision, had begun to twist itself through and around Dean's body, his muscles repairing themselves, reflecting what they had been…before the whole spell inside that damn cabin had nearly killed him. One of witches turned suddenly and looked directly where Sam was hiding and smiled…and there was nothing friendly about that smile…it was cruel and evil and laced in humor.

"Time to come out from the shadows Sam." The man called as his brown gaze shifted to where Sam was currently hiding. Even though he'd seen this in a vision and he had known that he would have to be involved in the actual ceremony…it still scared the shit out of him. _What if he wasn't able to save his brother? What if he simply wasn't strong enough? _

Sam inched out from where he'd been hiding and the feeling of helplessness was even worse than he'd imagined…being out in the open…seeing his brother lying splayed out and ready to be killed in a ritual that would send his undeserving soul straight to hell and give demons a level of power that they should never have. "You knew that it would come to this Sam…the visions would have 'shown' you that." The witch tilted his head and smiled at the youngest Winchester as he continued to carve bloody sigils into his older brother's chest. "You didn't think we knew about that…did you? Sam…we've know what you would become the whole time…since that night in your nursery twenty-two years ago…the visions were just the only way to get you to see it…but him…he isn't important other than using his soul as a spring board." he pointed at Dean with a bloody blade and then raised an eyebrow. "He can't be a part of this Sam…Dean has to go, it's just that simple…his usefulness is done once he dies on this table." The words were pouring out of the witch and they were twisting around inside of Sam's head like a snake…and evil snake that wanted him to kill his brother.

"What the hell are you talking about you fucking freak?" Sam said tightly through clenched teeth, he pulled his own curved blade and looked at the witch through narrowed eyes. His breathing was increasing as he watched Dean's eyelids start to flutter…_shit…he was waking up…and that means this night was either almost over…or just getting started._ That wasn't in the vision…he wasn't supposed to wake up until the yellow eyed demon showed up.

"I think you know what I'm talking about Sammy." The witch purred as the others shifted so that they were between Sam and Dean.

"You don't get to call me that." Sam managed through his gritted teeth. His anger rising rapidly to the surface that this bastard thought that he had the right to call Sam by Dean's brotherly name. "Let him go." Sam said in low voice.

"Now Sam…I think we both know _that_ isn't going to happen. Either you finish this, or I will and trust me when I say that your way will be far less painful for your brother." To prove his point he raised the blade and drug it down Dean's chest…over the scar from the Bender's, reopening the large wound and causing blood to simply cascade across Dean's pale flesh. Sam sucked in a breath as he watched the witch start into what now was simply torture…for Sam's benefit…not because of the ritual. "All you have to do is finish the ritual and this will all be over Sam." He was very careful in how he said the youngest Winchester's name. "And either you finish this…or…" he let the last part of the threat hang in the air between them.

"No! Stop." Sam cried out as the witch lifted the blade again. Fine. I'll do it…just stop hurting him." His eyes were watery as he tried to move his frozen feet.

The man stepped back into the shadows and watched with interest as Sam stepped up next to the alter, his blue-green gaze inching up and down the sigils carved into Dean's flesh…the wounds were healing even as he watched. He raised the curved blade….his hands shaking badly as he stared at his older brother…the same brother that had almost literally given his entire childhood for Sam. Nausea rose inside of him and flew up his throat as he looked down at Dean and then his hands started shaking even harder, if that was possible, as he watched his brother's eyelids begin to slowly inch open and the confused green of Dean's eyes was suddenly looking at him. "Sammy…?" His brother's deep gravelly voice floated up from the table where he was looking up at the dragon blade angled directly for his chest. He'd known that there was something that Sam hadn't been telling him…some part of this particular vision that Sam hadn't been telling them about…and apparently this had been it. "It's okay Sammy…I understand…" he said quietly and turned his eyes away from his little brother. Dean didn't want to make this any harder on Sam than it had to be…but at least this way they could stop the whole ritual…he knew that Sam's involvement meant that their plan was working. A of him knew that this was the way it had to be, that he needed to convince the witch that Sam would betray and kill him…but a small part buried deep inside him, one that he would deny even existed, thought there was simply _no way_ that that could be true.

Sam couldn't believe that he was hearing his brother tell him that it was okay to _kill_ him. He gulped down the swelling emotions inside himself and plunged the blade down…it slammed into the alter next to Dean and the thing cracked in half…spilling Dean's body onto the floor as Sam scrambled to try and catch his brother before he hit the ground. And then all hell broke loose, the witches scrambled forward to try and take out both the boys before they could ruin this spell…Bobby and John came out from the shadows…and Sam felt a blade go to his neck. The cold steel pressing into the soft skin so hard that he felt a trickle of blood run down and soak into the material of his shirt.

"SAM!" a voice from the darkness called frantically and his father lurched forward just as Bobby crashed through the other side of the room, like a bull in a china shop. The witch had scrambled up behind Sam and before John or Bobby could stop him, he moved the silver knife from Sam's neck and plunged the blade deep into Sam's back. A strangled cry escaped Sam's lips as he felt the burning sensation race along his nervous system.

The long curved silver blade sank to its hilt and the witch twisted it for good measure…severing Sam's spinal cord and causing the young man's legs to buckle beneath him. Sam crashed to his knees…never seeing the fatal blow as his father plunged a blade that was specially made, one that was supposed to be able to kill demons into the witch. This blade had been molded out of an ancient cross that he had melted down and then had sigils etched into the blade and several other spells spoken by Missouri as it cooled. The brilliant yellow light flashed from the wound as the witch's eyes shifted to black and he tossed his head back as the lightning flickered through the hole and the demon died. Two of the other witches also died almost instantly as Bobby managed to catch them from behind…but the yellow eyed demon…he wasn't among the dead.

Dean's eyes shot to Sam…where he'd just been stabbed by the blade that had been meant to take _his _life in the ritual. Dean could finally feel his legs…yet it seemed such a hollow victory… and as much as he wanted to celebrate that fact, he found himself lurching up onto his knees and then crawling on all fours across the dirty floor as Sam started to fall forward. Dean reared up onto his knees catching Sam before he could face plant on the dirty cement of the warehouse.

"Sam!?" He cried, anguish filling every syllable as Dean felt the heavy weight of his brother settle against his chest. He reached up and ran his fingers through his brother's hair and tried to hold up his head as it fell forward onto his chest…his own dying muscles unable to hold it up any longer. Dean wrapped his arms firmly around his brother, holding onto him as he prayed that this wasn't happening, and his left palm landed on the wet spot in the small of Sam's back…where Sam'd been stabbed…and his own heart nearly stopping when he realized exactly where the wound was. Dean's heart trying to deny something that his mind already knew was fact…_this was a fatal wound._

"It's gonna be okay Sam…I'm gonna take care of you…that's what I'm here for right? Take care of my pain in the ass little brother." Dean was rambling…he knew he was…but he couldn't stop the words from tumbling out his mouth as he simply held Sam's dying body. Because this couldn't have happened…he didn't just lose Sam. He couldn't accept that he'd failed in his one responsibility…the only one that he'd carried with him since he was four years old and his father had laid the squirming bundle of blankets in his tiny arms and told him to 'run'.

Dean finally noticed that Sam wasn't looking at him anymore…he wasn't even supporting his own weight. _NO…no…no…no…this can't be happening…I can't lose you Sam…not now…not like this…not for me._ Tears were pooling in Dean's brilliant green eyes as he tried to feel his brother's heartbeat…or Sam's ragged breathing…something, anything that would indicate that he hadn't just lost the most important person in his life….there was nothing.

Bobby stepped up behind Dean…where the brothers were both kneeling next to the alter table. He knew that the yellow eyed demon was supposed to have been here…but they definitely hadn't seen that bastard. He looked around suddenly as he remembered the oldest Winchester…and was surprised that he didn't see anything…the man was gone…and he'd left the tattered remains of the Winchester family bleeding and dying on the dusty floor of this room. _Damn that man!_ He thought silently.

Dean's breathing was ragged and uneven as he simply held onto Sam. His shaggy head leaning heavily against Dean's shoulders as they shook with his emotions as they rampaged through his body.

"Dean, we need to get him out of here." Bobby stepped up slowly and gently tried to help haul Dean to his feet. The older Winchester only now realizing that he _could_ climb to his feet…but the price of that one victory was too high. The older hunter watched as Dean struggled to get his legs under him and pull his weary body into an upright position. His hands never leaving Sam, he wouldn't allow his brother to fall onto the floor…he would keep him from crumbling inside of this warehouse.

XXXX

Dean slowly leaned against the doorway looking down at his brother's body…the thought nearly frozen inside his head…_his brother's body._ "Sammy…why didn't you tell me?" He asked brokenly, the silent room offering no answers to his question. His eyes were filling with tears for the…_he couldn't even remember how many times he'd cried at this point_…as he pulled a bottle to his lips and swallowed back the burning liquid. He knew that it was just numbing the pain, but he couldn't handle the death of his brother. Sam had tried to protect him…to repair the damage to his back and he'd paid for that attempt with his own life. And that was a price that Dean never would have asked…_hell he would never have allowed Sam anywhere near that place if he'd known that this was the price_. Those black eyed bastards hadn't gotten what they wanted…but they had broken up the bonded souls of the Winchester brother's without even trying…and it that they _had_ gotten something…because Dean didn't want this life without Sam. He didn't want to survive the death of his brother.

"Dean, I brought you something to eat." Bobby said as he came through the door of the warehouse and set a bucket of chicken down on a bench. Dean hadn't even known that he'd left…nor had he heard the man return.

Dean never moved from his silent vigil over his brother's body. "No thanks, I'm not hungry." He said tiredly as he tried to remember if he'd even eaten since this had happened…he wasn't even sure that he _could_ keep food down if he tried. Dean hadn't seen his father since the night of the ritual and a part of him wondered if they were able to find the man, if he would have a solution to this… "Did you find dad?" he asked. Dean wasn't sure if John had been killed, taken, or if he'd simply abandoned his sons that night. The last thought hurt so much he wanted to find a corner and simply curl up…the idea that his father had simply left Sam there to die. _But it wouldn't be the first time he'd left a son to die in his place._ The thought had no more than slashed through his head before he heard a booted heel striking the ground behind him. He turned and was surprised as he came face to face with the angry gaze of his father.

"Dean…?" John ground out as he stared the red-rimmed eyes of his eldest son…his gaze flickered to the prone form of his youngest and tears stung as he blinked rapidly to clear the emotion. He didn't have much time and he had to make sure that Sam was okay before he…

"Dean…?" A deep familiar voice, that Dean was certain he would never hear again, called from the direction where Sam's body had been laying for the better part of two days. He spun his head at the sound and his knees turned to jelly as he saw Sam trying to sit up, his hands going to his head as he tried to focus around the confused haze in his brain. His brother was alive…how? Dean pushed those thoughts down as he took in the sight of Sam sitting up and looking blearily at him.

"Sammy…?" Dean breathed as he closed the distance between them, sinking to his knees and reaching out to pull his younger brother into a hug. He pressed his face into Sam's neck and closed his eyes as he felt the strong thrum of Sam's heartbeat through the ward skin.

Sam's faced scrunched in pain. "Dean…Dean…ouch…" he finished as his older brother finally realized what was happening and released him. He looked into the soulful blue-green eyes of his little brother and couldn't help the grin that spread across his face.

"Sorry…sorry." Dean mumbled quietly…although he wasn't sorry at all. Sam couldn't help the smile that spread across his own face when he realized that his brother was standing. He wasn't rolling in a wheelchair…he was using his own legs.

"You're walking Dean." He said slowly. Sam's eyes moved over to connect with his father's and then narrowed, Sam knew that _he_ wasn't supposed to survive that encounter with the witch…so how was he alive and Dean was walking? What exactly had their father done?

"Dad." Sam said as his father simply nodded at him. John wanted to hug his son…to tell him how proud he was and that as long as he and Dean were together that they could withstand anything those evil sons a bitches could throw at them…but he didn't…he didn't say a word about his son's twin destinies.

"Glad you're okay Sam." John said as he turned to walk from the room. His time was up…he'd gotten what he'd wanted. He knew that Sam was alive and that Dean had been healed…that was all he had bargained for…and now it was time to pay up.

Bobby watched the interaction with rising concern and he couldn't seem to put his finger on what was wrong here…but something wasn't adding up and he just couldn't seem to understand exactly what it was. John simply nodded at Bobby as he walked by and slowly exited the room.

It took Dean a moment to notice that his father had left them…he wanted to go after him…but part of him was scared that if he let Sam out his sight then this would all turn out to be a dream and he wouldn't have his brother back. He swallowed the lump forming in his throat and over ruled his fears jogging after his dad, leaving Sam in Bobby's capable hands. He relished the freedom of movement for a moment before he finally started calling for his father.

"Dad?" he called as he walked out of the building, his eyes scanning in either direction…and then finally landing on the prone form of his father. "DAD!" he cried as he ran the few steps separating them and fell to his knees, his fingers going instantly to the pulse point on his dad's neck. He nearly sobbed a curse when he felt nothing…he had lost his brother and now his father in the last two days and it wasn't okay…not on any level.

Sam slowly walked from the building and his heart clenched painfully when he saw his brother kneeling over the body of their father…and suddenly he knew. He just knew. Sam understood what their father had done…he'd known that Sam wouldn't make it out of that ritual alive. And he'd come up with a contingency plan…their father had made a deal…he didn't know what type of deal or with what. But somehow John Winchester had worked it so that both his boys were alive and whole.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _This is where the boys can get back to what is pretty much cannon…although there will be a chapter that deals with Sam's guilt over their father…and Dean's. Should be interesting to see how things develop when the death of their father is on Sam's shoulders and not Dean's._

**Please Review: I'm really looking forward to what you guys think about this little twist on canon. **


	23. New Direction

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. Also thank you to any reviewers that are 'guests' since I cannot PM and you guys personally._**

**Chapter 23**

_New Direction_

Dean was sitting in the kitchen at Bobby's. He hadn't said much to Sam other than hugging him like his life depended on it. And he was walking as little as possible, something about getting his legs back just felt wrong now. He wasn't sure exactly what it was, but he knew that _he_ was the reason for John's death and worse, his problem had also gotten his brother killed. That particular thought was rampaging through his head as he stared at the cup of coffee sitting in front of him, it was in one of the many miscellaneous mugs that Bobby owned. Pain shifted inside his chest, but it wasn't the type that one got from an injury, it was the type that came from absolute and utter desolation. He had been the cause of Sam's death. Him. No one else could take that burden, and while he regretted the death of their father, _it _wasn't what was keeping him up at night right now…it was Sam. How was he going to protect Sam in the future…? How did he ensure that Sam even _had_ a future…?

"Hey kid, you okay this morning?" Bobby asked as he went to the counter and poured himself a cup of the nearly black liquid. He knew it was going to be strong; Dean always drank his coffee stronger than the average individual. "You look like shit Dean." He continued as he sat down across from the younger man.

Dean snorted. "Been a rough night." He didn't say anything else. He didn't need to. Bobby had been there, he knew what had happened and what his little brother had been willing to sacrifice…and Sam hadn't told Dean. _Hell, Dean had given up contacting Sam for almost four years, simply so that the kid wouldn't suffer along with him_…and in one instant the youngest Winchester had been fully and completely pulled back into this crazy life…_and it had killed him_. That was where Dean's guilt was stemming from. He knew that he couldn't' have changed Sam's decision, the damn kid was stubborn, but…_could Dean really protect him? This destiny thing…_

"I know that kid and I'm sorry." He reached over and gently squeezed Dean's forearm. Dean nodded at him and tried to smile…he couldn't. "I'm gonna head out to the shop. I got some things I need to take care of." Bobby glanced at the empty living room. "Let me know if either of you boys need anything." Dean nodded silently and went back to his introspection. Bobby shook his head as he stood up and headed for the screen door…_this wasn't going to be an easy come back…not for any of them._

Dean sat quietly for another twenty minutes before Sam finally wandered into the kitchen in search of coffee and his older brother. "Mornin." He said as he doctored up his coffee with cream and sugar and sank into the chair next to Dean.

Dean's tired green eyes glanced up and he nodded his 'reply' and continued to drink the bitter brew. He didn't know how to start this conversation with Sam…he wasn't sure how to even talk to the kid anymore.

Sam furrowed his eyebrows. "You not talking to me or something?" He asked as he watched Dean carefully.

Dean sighed and set his mug down. "I'm talking to you Sam." He answered as he leaned forward and scrubbed his hands down his face. "I just don't know what to say." He finished evenly. It was true...what did you say to someone that had died for you? There wasn't exactly a hallmark card for that.

Sam looked like Dean had smacked him, his face pinched painfully and he shifted so he was sitting further back from Dean. "What's that supposed to mean Dean?" His older brother just shook his head and stood slowly, moving away from the table and back into the living room. Sam was having none of it. Dean had been literally ignoring him for the last three days and he was sick of it. "What the hell man?" he called as he stood and followed Dean into the other room. "What is going on with you?"

Dean turned and stared at Sam in disbelief. "What's going on with me…? Really, Sam. What the hell do you think is going on with me?" His voice was getting deeper and more even the angrier he got...and that should have been a warning to Sam. Dean was trying not to lash out at Sam…he knew that he would have done exactly the same thing in Sam's position. But that was the way it was supposed to be…_him_ protecting Sam…whatever the cost. That code did not extend both ways…Dean couldn't handle the thought of losing what little family he had left. And this life seemed intent on killing out the entire Winchester family…one member at a time. He'd never been more clear on that fact than he was since the warehouse.

"I had to save you Dean." Sam said quietly. He wasn't sure how to explain that _need_ to his martyr of a older brother. "Dean…this shit with your legs…the stuff with dad…getting sent to hell...I couldn't just ignore that. Most of it happened when I left man…and I had to try and set it right." He watched as Dean looked everywhere but in his eyes as he listened to Sam's reasoning. Sam reached out and gently grabbed Dean's shoulder and pulled him around to look him in the face. "Dean…it's what you would have done."

Dean shook his head as he finally lifted his gaze to meet Sam's. "Of course it's what _I_ would have done Sam!" he yelled. His cool finally broken as he stared angrily at his younger brother, his fist clenching and unclenching at his side. "It's what I would have _had_ to do…that's _my job_. But you…you were out Sammy…you had a life and it wasn't' gonna get you killed. Not like this one." Dean allowed his voice to calm down as he tried to get Sam to understand why he was angry. He wasn't angry _with_ Sam…but with this life and what it was costing them. _He_ couldn't get out…it was too ingrained into his soul…he would track down and kill the demon responsible for the death of their father. But he was no longer sure that he wanted Sam along for the ride. If he could get out…then he should…and if that meant that Dean had to push him a bit…then that was what he would do. When Dean had called him from the road...it had been a mistake. He knew that now. But he just wasn't sure that Sam would feel the same way, his brother would feel guilty and try to make up for lost time. But it was probably a good thing that a lot of that time had been lost...because Sam may have simply died earlier and then Dean would have been...lost too.

Sam stared at Dean dumbfounded. "Did you really just say that Dean? That my life is somehow worth more than yours?" His blue-green eyes were spitting angry sparks at Dean's green gaze. Had their father really fucked up his older brother _that_ badly…that he _believed this shit_. As he looked into the strained gaze of his brother…he knew that that was exactly what had happened. "Dean, my life…it doesn't mean a god-damned thing without you. I need you around…" He stepped up and grabbed Dean's other shoulder so that he couldn't look away. The pain and the emotions that were swirling behind the mask were pretty evident at the moment.

Dean wanted to turn and run away from this 'chick-flick- moment from hell…but he couldn't. As he looked up into the sincere eyes of his younger brother…he saw the same determination that he knew he harbored. Sam wanted to save him…and no matter what _he_ wanted…Sam was going to do everything possible to see that done.

"Please Dean…" he finished as he stepped away. Sam sank onto the couch and leaned his elbows on his knees, dropping his head into his hands. "Please…" he whispered.

Dean felt the tightness in his chest increase as he watched his little brother struggle…he couldn't just watch Sam suffer. He stepped forward and sank to his knees in front of Sam. "Okay Sam." He said simply. Dean reached forward and ran his hand over his brother's bowed head, "Okay…"

Sam felt the first shutter of tears rip through his system and he leaned further into his hands as he tried to remain strong…as strong as he could be while begging his brother to _let him in._ "I hear you Sam. I hear you." He said quietly. He patted Sam's head and then walked away, trying to give his brother some time to pull himself together.

XXXX

Dean was under the Impala when he heard footsteps approaching. He continued to work on the exhaust until a large pair of emo-shoes stopped near his feet. "What Sam?" He called from the underside of the car.

"Hey, you need anything? Can I help?" Sam asked as Dean pulled himself out from under the car, his grey t-shirt covered in oil and dirt.

Dean just glared at him and raised an eyebrow. "You under a hood…no thanks." His younger brother glared back and shook his head in irritation at the dismissive answer from him.

"Okay…you need anything else?" Sam pressed.

"Stop it Sam." Dean said as he walked past and went to pull another type of wrench out of the well-stocked tool-box.

"Stop what?" Sam playing dumb…that didn't bode well.

"Stop asking if I need anything, stop asking if I'm okay…I'm okay." Dean finished with a light chuckle. Sam watched as the amusement didn't reach his brother's eyes. He pulled the cell phone out of his pocket and opened the old phone, keying in the code to the voicemail.

"Well, that's not really why I came out here. It took me a while, but I finally cracked the code on one of dad's old cell phones. " He handed the phone to Dean and watched as he listened to the message. "That message is over four months old."

Dean's eyebrows shot up and he looked up at Sam and narrowed his eyes. "Dad saved this chick's message for four months?" Sam nodded. "Okay, ask Bobby if he has a problem with us taking off." He said as he crawled back under the car. Dean knew that they needed to start moving forward, either hunting or tracking that damn demon...either way this needed to happen. Besides, at least this way Sam would believe that he was really on board with letting them hunt together again. And maybe he was...but he'd have to prove it to his younger brother...and this was one way that he could do that.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _This is going to follow some of the hunts in season two, with some pretty significant differences that will make this a bit of an AU and a canon mix. Some action packed chapters ahead…less angst more hunting and of course a showdown with the yellow-eyed demon at the end._

**Please Review: Please let me know what you think about the direction of this.**


	24. Dean and Sam, Meet Gordon Walker

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._**

**Chapter 24**

_Dean and Sam meet Gordon Walker_

As they pulled back toward Harvelles roadhouse Dean couldn't help the small smile that pulled at his lips. They'd nearly been taken down by a blind killer clown…_what the hell._ He glanced over at Sam; his brother was staring out into the darkness as they turned down the last curve and saw the parking lot. Both Winchester boys had been surprised that this woman and her daughter knew so much about them, so much about their father. Sam looked over at him when he heard the intake of breath as Dean laughed. "A killer clown…a blind killer clown…nearly got us."

"Yeah…I'm aware Dean." He answered as he watched the genuine humor flashing across Dean's face. It was the first time that he'd seen his brother smile in a while and damn did it look good. "Man, I hate clowns." Sam said evenly.

Dean chuckled louder. "I knew that. You used to burst out crying every time Ronald McDonald came on the tv." He was full on laughing out loud at this point…he knew he shouldn't laugh at his brother's fears…since he was scared shitless of flying…but damn-it…clowns?

Sam furrowed his eyebrows and flipped Dean a one fingered solute as he tried to hide a smile that was causing his dimples to deepen. He liked the direction that things had gone on this hunt, they hadn't learned anything new about the demon, but he and Dean were working together better. And that was worth not learning anything new. His brother was talking more and certainly smiling more often…he had joked with Sam a few times about different aspects of this hunt. "Well at least I'm not afraid of flying." He shot back without thinking about the answer.

"Planes crash Sam." He said quickly. Defending his ongoing fear of planes and flying in general. He'd never mentioned it to Sam and he'd kinda hoped that that was one thing that Sam wouldn't ever know about him.

"And apparently clowns kill." Sam couldn't even say it with a straight face. He started laughing before they'd even come to a halt in front of the bar.

Dean looked over at him and smiled. "Apparently they do. Come on man…let's get a beer." He turned off the car and stepped out of the vehicle, placing his hands on his lower back and stretching his muscles. Getting thrown around by the clown, hadn't felt too good. He was glad that he was at least able to walk, but he certainly hadn't missed getting chucked around by monsters.

XXXX

By the time they decided to leave the bar and head back toward Bobby's, they were a little closer to finding the demon. Ellen had known more about the hunting of that demon than either of them had…she had known that there was a weird connection with John and it…but she had never connected all the dots. A fact that made Dean distinctly happy…since he really didn't want anyone knowing that his own father had sold out his sons.

He'd decided to let Sam drive as long as he agreed that shotgun got to pick the music…effectively dismantling his own rules. Normally he wouldn't have let his little brother drive his baby, but Sam had seemed to need to stretch his own 'wheels'. So it hadn't been that difficult of a decision to let him take the reins for a bit. He pushed in a new tape of Metallica, and grabbed a soda from the bag resting at his feet. He caught sight of his legs and he noticed for the first time that they fit his jeans perfectly. Dean was no longer the wreck of person he had been…he was whole…at least physically. They decided to stop in a small town before driving the last several hundred miles to North Dakota.

"I'll go get us a room." Sam said as he pulled into a local motel and turned off the Impala. He glanced over at Dean. "You wanna see about some dinner?" His brother nodded and licked his lips as he climbed out of the passenger seat and walked around to the driver's side.

"Yeah, I think I saw a diner down the street or maybe it was a bar and grill…I'm not really sure." He patted Sam on the shoulder and smiled. "Make sure it's got lots of hot water. I know how much you like your girly showers."

Sam turned and glared at him. "Whatever dude. Just get me something besides fried greasy food." He watched with rising irritation as Dean shot him a solute and then got into the car. "Just go."

"Remember…lots of hot water." Dean shot out as he pulled away. Sam was shaking his head as he walked into the rental office. A few minutes later he had the room key and was headed to the second floor. He realized an interesting fact as he was walking up the stairs; _they _could actually have a room on the second floor. Dean could walk and he could climb to their room. He couldn't help feeling satisfied that he had done what he had to…he had protected his brother.

Dean pulled into the dinner and grabbed his wallet before heading into the restaurant. It was a typical family diner, with the typical food…but he searched the menu until he found a pretty decent looking salad and added chicken to the order. He procured his usual burger with onions and fries along with pie. He leaned against the counter sipping a coke as he waited. The waitress, one miss 'Julie', was eyeing him from across the room. He smiled in her direction, but that was all he could bring himself to engage in. He'd certainly had his reputation well established as a 'player' before the incident. But now? He wasn't that guy anymore and he didn't want those type of hookups. He wanted to hunt with his brother and search for his father's killer…and he wanted to learn how to get Sam out of whatever it was that the demons expected him to fulfill. Because they weren't getting his little brother…and random women…well, that would simply distract him from what he needed to do here.

He grabbed a paper so that she might get the hint and stop looking at him like he should be on the menu. His green eyes were sliding over the headlines when one caught his attention. A woman was found murdered in the woods, her head had been removed with what cops assumed was a machete. _Well…that didn't sound too good. A…hunt…probably_. Dean's brain rationalized. While it was off the beaten path he figured that he and Sam should probably stick around and check this out. _Julie _brought him his order and smiled as she handed him the boxed and bagged food. "Here's your receipt." She smiled as she slipped the paper onto the counter in front of Dean…her phone number was written at the bottom of the receipt.

Dean smiled and held up the bag as he turned to walk out of the diner. He grabbed a copy of the paper from the machine out front and then crawled into the Impala. He raised his eyebrows as some of his old life seemed to fall into place…the women…it seemed preferred men that could walk. He sighed as he started the car and headed back to the small motel.

"Sam…dinner's here." He called as he opened the motel room and saw the light beneath the door of the bathroom. That little twerp better _have_ left him some of the hot water this time. Dean set the bags of food on the small table and then went to the TV, grabbing the remote off Sam's bed and switching the channel from national geographic to the local news. He was engrossed in the evening news when Sam exited the room, steam billowing out behind him as he grabbed his duffel and pulled out a clean pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He looked at the change of station on the tv and then pulled his clean clothes on as he sank next to Dean and watched the newscaster talk about the multiple homicides in the small town they were currently residing in.

"So…a hunt?" he asked as he pulled a comb through his wet hair.

Dean nodded and pointed to the bags of food. "Got you a salad princess."

Sam rolled his eyes in irritation at the snarky remark, but a part of him was grateful to hear his brother _bantering _with him again. "Okay…" He saw the receipt and he chuckled as he saw the number with little hearts on the paper. "How'd you pay for dinner, there prince charming."

Dean threw him a confused look until he saw the paper in Sam's fingers and then he raised his eyebrows and shrugged. "The usual way." He dead-panned. "Just eat the fricken rabbit food and stop pestering me about it." His older brother stood up and grabbed his own white Styrofoam box and then returned to the bed, finishing the news while he ate quietly.

Sam knew that things had changed with Dean in the last year. Hell, they'd both done a lot of _changing_ over the last few months alone. But this kinda quiet introspective _Dean_, was one that he wasn't sure how to talk to. "So…decapitation…vampires…?" He asked as he stuffed another mouthful of the green leafy salad into his mouth. Dean had also stopped and grabbed a six-pack of beer, so he stood and pulled one from the small fridge and then offered one to his brother…who gratefully accepted the dark bottle.

"Thanks." He muttered. Dean leaned back and popped the top on his beer with the ring on his left middle finger. "Yeah, I think it might be. Think we should check out this little bar I saw up the street…maybe they know something about it." He took a long slow draw on the beer and the closed his eyes contentedly as it slid easily down his throat.

"Alright. But you might want to shower first dude…you stink." Sam said as he eyed Dean and took a drink of his own beer. Dean furrowed his forehead and glared at Sam…but there was no heat in the gaze…before he stood and grabbed his duffel and shower bag.

"You leave me any hot water?" he asked over his shoulder.

"Yup." Sam said immediately. He'd gotten enough beat-downs as a teenager to know that taking all the hot water was a serious matter with Winchesters.

XXXX

Dean stared at the secured form of Gordon Walker. He couldn't believe that he'd been drawn into the man's lies as easily as he had. Sam had seen right through the son of a bitch…but not him…he'd been all in. Completely taking what the man had told him as gospel, while he'd dismissed everything that Sam had told him about the nature of this hunt. He shifted his shoulders as they twitched with pain; getting tossed around by the other man hadn't been fun. But he was, however, slightly pleased to realize that he still had all the reflexes that he'd learned over the years.

He heard the Impala pull into the driveway and he stepped around to stare at the other man. Gordon was looking everywhere but at Dean currently, his bloody lip a testament to their fight earlier.

"Did I miss anything?" Sam asked he walked into the living room of the vampire's nest and previously their home. He was stretching his arm, where Gordon had cut it earlier and they had yet to stitch it together. His blue-green gaze shifting easily from the man tied to a chair and his older brother who looked…well, he looked battered…but alive.

Dean shook his head. "Not much…did Lenore get out?"

"Yeah, they all did." Sam answered as he looked straight into the frustrated eyes of the detained hunter. Dean pulled his lip up and then nodded his approval of the situation as he circled Gordon.

"Need anything Gordy? Tinkle…? We'll call someone in two or three days, have them come and untie you." He was still circling the other hunter as Sam watched with interest. He knew that the fact that the man had cut _him_, in front of Dean, had put him on Dean's shit-list.

"You ready to go?" He asked evenly.

Dean looked at him for minute and then back at Gordon, the anger in his gut still churning at the remembered sight of him slicing into Sam's arm and then hanging the bloody wound over a vampire…just to prove a point. "Not yet…well I guess this is good bye…" He said as he ran his fingers through his hair and then brought his arm down and back up in a vicious arc, connecting with Gordon's jaw and sending the chair over backwards.

Sam watched with something akin to wonder as he saw Dean throw a solid right upper cut into the other hunter's jaw. He'd been on the receiving end of Dean's upper cut's before…and they hurt like hell. He blew out a long slow breath as he shifted his arm and then turned away from the unconscious hunter.

Once they exited the house Dean asked him to punch him…no retaliation…Sam knew that he wanted to even the score for the shot his older brother had hit him with earlier. But Sam wasn't going to do that…Dean had been through enough without him adding to the growing list of injuries.

XXXX

Hunts came and went over the next few weeks…each one bringing its own set of challenges and some even brought them closer to the demon bastard that'd killed their father. Sam and Dean fell into a pretty normal style of hunting and living as they became more and more accustomed to working together again. Dean got used to being able to walk again…his guilt over the cost didn't subside, but it did ease some, so that he was able to concentrate on finding the bastards that'd been killing off Winchesters for more than two decades. The Croatoan virus scare, had caused Dean to lash out at Sam…they'd argued and Dean had accused him of leaving their family for his own selfish reasons…that had resulted in Sam taking off in the middle of the night. And now…well Dean was desperate to find the kid. He was every bit as well trained in hiding and evasion tactics as Dean was…and he was employing all of them at the moment.

He'd left a note asking for some time…_Dean, I just need a few weeks to get my head on straight…don't follow me. I'll find you. –Sam-. _

Dean had been out of his mind with worry ever since. He'd said some cruel things to his brother…things driven by fear and his own self-loathing…things he hadn't meant. And now he wondered if he'd have a chance to apologize. So he'd called Ellen…and she'd come through for him. Sam had stopped in and told her where he was headed, he hadn't elaborate about the reasons…but he'd been alive and talking when he'd been there. And that was more information than Dean had been able to get.

XXXX

The shots had whizzed by Sam's head as he ducked to pick something up off the floor. Several more bullets rang out before there was silence. He looked over at Eva…she was fine…still whole. He waited for a few more minutes before cautiously pulling himself to his feet. They headed out of the room when no other bullets sang through the window several minutes later. He'd determined that the trajectory of the shooter was above them and probably across the street on top of that old warehouse.

Sam picked up the casings and stared at them…_high velocity .203 rounds or maybe even .556…military grade._ He sighed as he voiced his opinion out loud and Eva stared at him like he really was a freak. She'd told him when she found him that she was having visions of him dying…ones like the visions he usually had that involved Dean dying. And this? This whole scenario was playing right into her visions of his death. But knowledge was power…he pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed Dean's number.

"Sammy…I've been looking for you." Dean's voice rang out over the line almost immediately.

Sam sighed a breath of relief at hearing the steady raspy voice of his older brother. "Yeah…sorry about that. I'm in Indiana…" He felt a pang of guilt at the worried tone in Dean's voice. Sam could just see his older brother running around trying to track him down…every horrible scenario playing out in his green eyes as he failed at every turn. And Sam had done that to him. What the hell kinda brother was he…he just kept making the same mistakes…he ran when things got rough…always had.

"Yeah, I know." Dean sighed over the phone.

"You do?"

"Yeah, talked to Ellen…Indiana…funky place man." Dean said and Sam's nerves went into overdrive. His awareness shifting into hyperdrive as he looked over at Eva. His brother had set up the 'code' when they'd started hunting again, in case something happened and one of them was being held at gun point.

"Uh…yeah. Hey I think someone's after me." Sam continued as the dark haired girl wandered around.

"What? Who?" Dean asked immediately. His voice sounded a little strained and Sam knew that he was being held against his will. Because his brother wouldn't just give up information…and he would have been chewing Sam's butt out if he'd been free to do so.

"I don't know." Sam said.

He heard Dean sigh. "Well, why don't you meet up with me? I'm staying at 5150 Monroe St. Old warehouse there."

"Yeah, I'll see you there." Sam said as he clicked his phone closed.

XXXX

'Shit…' _Gordon Walker…_that son of a bitch had grabbed his brother and used him to come after Sam. Dean was tied to a chair, just like they'd left Gordon, and he didn't look at all please with his new 'digs'. Sam cringed as he saw the handkerchief secured around his brother's mouth and the rope that had him immobilized. But it was the look on his brother's face that tore at his heart. Dean looked guilty and resigned…he was prepared to die…but he also looked like he knew something that he was having a hard time stomaching. Sam inched around to the back door; he pulled his lock picks and made quick work of the old lock.

He was careful as he stepped through, looking for the wire that he knew would be there to kill him if he misjudged his steps here…he didn't.

Dean heard the first explosion and his heart seized with a pain so achingly deep that he wished he'd been on the receiving end of that grenade. He strained against the bindings, feeling the ropes cut into his wrists and the feeling of the blood trickling down them not even registering as he screamed into the dirty gag.

"Shhhh…not yet." Gordon whispered as the dust settled. The second explosion rocked the building and Dean couldn't breathe. His lungs wouldn't expand and contract properly he just stared angrily at Gordon as the other man stepped up to him. "I'm sorry Dean." He said and then he hauled back and shot a fist forward slamming into Dean's unprotected face. His head snapped back as the chair went over backwards and the back of his head slammed into the concrete floor…his vision instantly going black.

Sam looked down at the unconscious form of Gordon Walker. His head lolling the side…he'd accused Sam of being a monster…but he wasn't the only monster in this room. And he sure as hell wasn't going to prove the man right by killing him while he was out cold. But _oh man…_did he want to kill that bastard. He stepped back when he didn't hear any movement from the other room…his head was spinning from the knocks he'd taken from the other hunter. His vision slightly blurry as he stepped through the hole his body had made in the wall. "Dean!" He called when he saw his brother's unconscious form lying on the floor, still tied to the chair. He jumped the few feet that were separating him and Dean and fell to his knees as he pulled at the gag and then the ropes that were securing him to the old chair. Sam was a bit surprised that it hadn't broken when it had fallen…but that was just Winchester luck.

Dean didn't move as he pulled him from the wood and laid him flat on the concrete, waiting for him to haul himself back to the land of the living. "Dean…come on man…wake up." Sam repeated over and over as he stared into the slowly twitching muscles of Dean's face. He reached up and gently tapped his brother's cheeks. "Come on."

Finally Dean's eyelid fluttered and he opened them only to be completely taken aback by the blurriness of his vision. He knew that it was his brother leaning over him…but the outlines were really fuzzy. "Sam?" he asked as he tried to pull himself to his knees, succeeding after only one unsuccessful attempt. He reached out for Sam's shoulders…at least he thought that they were Sam's shoulders, his eyes weren't coming into focus yet and he felt nauseous. _Great…concussion._ His head diagnosed when he found himself losing the contents of his stomach into the dust that covered the concrete floor.

XXXX

They'd managed to escape with their lives intact…but it was sketchy. Gordon had come to as he and Sam were crossing to the Impala. Sam was supporting most of Dean's weight as they made their way out into the night. The sound of gunfire zinging past their position had both brother's running and Dean, consequently, puking again in the grass.

"You call _this_ taken care of?" Dean asked as he wiped his lips and looked in Sam's general direction.

"Yeah…just wait for it." Sam said as he watched Dean and the blown pupils and the retching made him feel even more guilty…if that was even possible. Dean shook his head and kept his head down as Gordon continued firing and then missed the sounds of siren's as police showed up and arrested Gordon…

"Anonymous call." Sam said as he smiled. Dean shook his head carefully and then smirked around the pain and rolling gut.

"You're a real classy citizen Sam" He said evenly as they waited for the cops to disappear.

Once they'd gotten back to the motel, it was Sam's turn to look closely at his brother. Dean's pupils were definitely blown and there was both a black eye starting and goose egg on the back of his head the size of an orange. He wasn't looking directly at Sam…his eyes were shifting in the general direction, but they were certainly not focusing on the other man. "Dean, your eyes…they okay?" Sam asked as he stared at the odd look in his brother's green gaze. He heard his brother sigh and then Dean sank onto the bed as he _felt _his way…rather than looked to see where the bed was.

"Uh…visions pretty sucky actually." He quipped as he felt for his boots and groaned when his head protested the change in elevation and his stomach rebelled again. He lurched to his feet and stumbled blindly for the bathroom, his eyes swinging wildly as they took in the large blurry shapes of the door frame and the other bed. He crashed to his knees in front of the porcelain 'god' and retched until there was nothing but the intense pounding in his head and bile in his stomach.

"Damn-it Dean." Sam started to complain…and then stopped quickly when he realized that this had happened as a result of his stubbornness. He kept hurting Dean…he didn't mean to, but for some reason the universe seemed to hate Dean Winchester and it proved at every turn. And Sam …he wasn't helping any of it.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Next Chapter has some AU style information in it to get the boys heading in the direction of the yellow eyed demon, and since Sam already died…there's no need for the trek into South Dakota. But the information that Azazel gave to Sam is integral to the story…so working that in. _

**Please Review: I was so sad when almost no one reviewed the last chapter…please take the time.**


	25. Past Sins

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback... Thank you all who did review the last chapter...and thank you to all guest reviewers that I can't PM._**

**Chapter 25**

_Past Sins_

It had been two days since their most recent visit with Gordon…and Dean's vision was still bad. He could see lights and shadows and large shapes. But he couldn't see anything clearly. Everything was basically a large blob with light and dark shadows…but no real definition.

He was leaning against a counter with his hands holding him upright and staring into the sink of the bathroom in another nameless motel…he could hear Sam bustling around in the other room and he sighed in frustration as he felt around for the toothbrush he'd originally come in here for. Sam was taking this whole thing with Gordon about as well as Dean would if he'd been the reason that Sam'd gotten hurt. Not that he was blaming Sam…but he knew his brother well enough to know that his younger brother was a walking ball of angst where he was concerned. Particularly lately…ever since Dean got his legs back and they'd started hunting again.

But true to Winchester luck…the universe really hated Dean Winchester. He couldn't figure out what it was with him that seemed keep getting him not only injured but like seriously life changingly injured. It was bullshit and he hated it. He looked for the 'blob' that had to be a towel and reach almost blindly for it as he set the toothbrush down. He swore when he heard it hit the bathroom floor and he was immediately on his knees looking for the damn thing. And…._thank you universe…_that's where he was when his brother found him. On his hands and knees feeling along the rough tile for a toothbrush that there was no way in hell he'd be using again after this little excursion to the dirty motel floor.

"Dean?" Sam asked he pushed the door open slowly. He'd only wanted to see if Dean needed anything and he hadn't gotten an immediate answer which had led him to go against one of his brother's primary directives '_Don't interrupt a man while he's alone in the bathroom.'_ The sight of his older brother feeling across the floor for…what?...oh, a toothbrush…that happened to be resting near Sam's foot…was both incredibly sad and a little funny all at the same time. Sam leaned down and picked up the offending blue plastic and the reached down to try and help his brother to his feet. "I got it, Dean…" he said as his brother actually _allowed_ him to be pulled upright.

"Sorry…couldn't see where it landed." Dean muttered as he righted himself and then reached out for the wall and scooted past Sam's body and into the other room. Sam furrowed his eyebrows and then shook his head as he tossed the brush into the trash…_Dean won't use it after this anyways._ He thought to himself. This whole thing with Dean's eyes was starting to worry him. Initially he'd been okay with waiting for the swelling on his brother's head to go down and then he'd assumed that Dean's vision would return to normal…it hadn't.

"I tossed that one out Dean." He said as he followed Dean into the other room. Watching silently as his brother picked around in his duffel bag for a t-shirt and some socks. His jeans were resting low on his hips and Sam found his eyes being drawn to the scars that littered his brother's body. The ones that marred his back were probably mostly from hunts…or those damn redneck hicks that had tortured him. But the ones on his chest…which immediately drew Sam's attention as soon as Dean turned to sit on the bed and put on his socks…_those_ were all Sam's fault, the sigils that would be a permanent part of his skin from now on. _He'd _done that to Dean…well not physically…but he'd allowed it to happen and that was just as bad….as far as he was concerned.

"I'm gonna run to the gas station and grab us some coffee…any special requests?" Sam asked when he could no longer stand staring at the damage on Dean's body. He grabbed the keys to the Impala and then moved past where Dean was currently pulling his grey t-shirt over his still slightly damp hair.

"Uh…if you can wait a minute I'll go with you?" Dean asked as he looked up at the blurry form of his big 'little' brother.

"I'm only gonna be like…10 minutes Dean." He insisted. Sam wanted a few moments to himself…to work through his rising emotions where his older brother was concerned. He was not handling the _changes_ in their lives as well as he would have liked and he could use a few moments to clear his head. But then the memories of leaving his brother less than two weeks ago…alone…resurfaced and he understood where Dean's fear was coming from. "I'm not running Dean…I just want to grab some coffee…and maybe a new toothbrush for you." He watched as Dean processed this rejection of his company and against his better judgment, finally nodded and settled back onto the bed.

"As long as it's not pink." He said with a slight smile. "And make it the soft kind." Dean added as he watched the Sam-blob move away from him. He heard his brother chuckle at the request.

"Okay, soft and not pink. Got it." Sam said as he pulled open the door of their room, walking out into the crisp cool air of the October morning.

"And some donuts." Dean called after his retreating form…but before he could shut the door.

"Fine…donuts too." Sam called over his shoulder as he descended the stairs and walked to the car.

XXXX

Dean sat on bed listening to the tv…he couldn't see it, but he could hear the VH1 show that Sam had found before he'd barged in on Dean's bathroom time. He might need to reiterate the rules of living with _Dean_ when his brother got back. Cuz, that little one, was right at the top of the list just below _Don't use all the hot water princess._

It had been way too long and Dean was pacing now…he'd managed to figure out where all of the furniture was, so he wasn't stumbling into things…but Sam had been gone for far longer than he'd said he would be and Dean was worried. What was it with his brother? Every time Dean turned his back, his brother was disappearing on him…whether by his choice, or through the actions of others… this problem seemed to be a new emerging pattern in their lives.

He sat down at the table in their room and leaned his head into his hands…every single time that Sam did this, it played havoc with his emotions. Dean loved his brother…more than anything….but this stubborn _streak_ in Sam was gonna kill _him_. Disappearing then reappearing at random places and having done random things that he couldn't fully explain to Dean. The last time with Gordon and Ava and the whole getting beaten by the wacked out hunter…and then thinking that he'd managed to kill Sam…? Well, that wasn't the first time that Sam had disappeared. His thoughts jumped to that time in Flagstaff…he'd sworn to himself that he wouldn't think about that time and what he'd endured as a result of Sammy's 'down time'. He'd thought he was over that whole thing…apparently he was totally wrong about that.

_Dean was munching away happily on a piece of licorice…he loved the stuff…and he knew that Sam hated it… Like _really_ hated the long ropey candy…so Dean had gotten an extra-large bag just to taunt his little brother. The kid had turned into one moody and difficult to live with little bastard since he'd turned thirteen. Which was part of the reason why Dean had let the little shit walk home from the library today. Sam was starting to bitch about nearly everything that their father did…and it was creating some serious heat between him and their father. And that heat was starting to blow back on Dean. Their father was angrier than usual and he was certainly more likely to cuff Dean upside the head for simple things lately. But since Sam had started his little bitchy emo-fest, their father had come after Dean with more force than usual. He twisted his ribs carefully as he remembered the shot he'd taken to them for defending Sam about a week ago. Nothing had been broken, but he'd certainly been bruised by the power behind the blow…not to mention more than a little surprised. _

_While John wasn't exactly father of the year, he'd never out and out _hit_ Dean like that. Not even when they sparred, his father would pull his punches to avoid injuring his sons. But this time he hadn't. He'd let fly with a roundhouse punch straight to Dean's lower ribs while informing him that he needed to get his brother in line. Because the only reason he would be lashing out like this, was if Dean was somehow 'fueling' it. Dean had stared at his father from his hunched over position with a look of utter surprise and a deep and intense hurt reflecting from his bright green eyes. _

_After that he'd tried to stay away from his father, for at least a few days. He ignored both the flash of physical pain and the gnawing feeling that was growing exponentially in his stomach with the increasing emotional distance he felt happening between him and both of the other members of his small family. Seemed like lately he wasn't really any good to either one of the other Winchesters…but he'd keep that to himself and he'd continue to watch out for both them…because, that was his job. _

_He pulled the key to their room from his pocket and opened the door, fully expecting to hear Sammy bitching from his bed about the light interrupting his reading. But all Dean got was utter silence…he frowned as he set his bag down on the bed closest to the door and flipped on the lights, flooding the small room with pale yellow as he scanned it for his brother. Nothing. No Sam…he started moving through the room, his pace increasing toward panicked…looking for the kid, he wasn't in the bathroom and…yeah…that was pretty much the extent of the place._

_He grabbed the keys to the Impala and rushed from the room, carefully locking the door behind him as he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed the number. It rang until the Sam's voice came over the speaker, telling whoever was calling to 'leave a message'. Dean's heart was starting to pump at an irregular rate as he crawled into the car and fired up her engine. _

_Three hours later he was sitting back in the parking lot, his head leaning against the steering wheel in frustration and anger. No one had seen Sam. He'd left the library six hours ago and then…nothing. The trail just went ice cold. Dean knew what he had to do now…but frankly he was scared shitless of what his father was going to say when he found out that Dean had 'lost' his younger brother. He was fairly sure the hit he'd taken the other day…was only the start of what his father was going to do to him. And 'damn-it' he deserved it. He'd let his irritation with Sam's growing rebelliousness affect his primary directive of protecting the kid…and now? He was gone and Dean had no clues…or leads about where he was._

_He'd called Sam's cell until the voice mail was full…he'd texted until he'd known that there was no way that Sam wouldn't have answered him…if he could have. And now…Dean's hands were shaking as he picked his phone to make the final call to his father._

_"Dean?" Came the gruff voice after several rings. That was unusual; his father almost never answered his phone. "What do you want now?" _

_Dean swallowed hard as a lump formed in his throat. The burning behind his eyes had to be from the smoke in the air…fire somewhere or something…yeah, that would explain the tears. "Uh…dad…Sammy's missing." He blurted out. He cringed when his father started throwing explicatives his way…like every single one that Dean had ever heard in his seventeen years…and some he hadn't. He finally pulled the phone slightly away from his ear and just laid his head against the cold glass of the driver's window. Finally, his father must have run out things to call him, because he heard the silence as John waited for an explanation. _

_"He was supposed to be at the library and then come straight home…but when he didn't show up, I went to the library to get him and he'd left there over three hours before I asked about it. I talked to his study partner and also to the librarians and some people that were just milling around…none of them remembered seeing anything weird." Dean gulped in air before he continued, not daring to tell his father that none of them even remembered the floppy haired teen. "He's just gone dad. No trail, no nothing."_

_"Get back to the motel and wait there until I can get back into town." John growled angrily as he flipped his truck around and headed back toward Flagstaff. "So help me God, Dean…do not leave that room. He might come back on his own." _

_"I won't dad….and dad…?" Dean waited until his father finally acknowledged his question. He knew that he'd just piss the man off further if didn't wait._

_"What Dean?" He said in low dangerous voice. His rage barely contained along with an underlying current of fear for his youngest son._

_"I'm sorry I fucked up here. This is my fault." Dean said quietly, his eyes stinging from the weight of his guilt and the awful thoughts pouring through his head…things that could be happening to Sammy even as they searched for him._

_He heard his father pull in a loud breath of air. "Yeah Dean…you did. And we're so gonna talk about it when I get back." The phone went dead as he hung up and Dean nearly folded in on himself in anguish._

_It took his nearly fifteen minutes to haul himself back into the lonely room of their shared motel. He stood in the center of the room and just looked at the bed that was 'Sam's' and his eyes started to burn again with emotion. He had finally managed to sit down on his own bed and stare at the blank tv for a while before his father stormed into the room. John was all flying fists and loud angry accusations as he tore through what little calm Dean had managed to build over the past couple of hours. _

_"I only gave you one job Dean…one! And you couldn't do it! What the fuck is wrong with you boy?! Are you just too stupid or is it that you're too lazy to take care of your brother properly?! He's a kid for Christ's sake…and you're telling me you couldn't keep track of a thirteen year old boy? How am I supposed to know that I can trust you on hunt when you can't even do this one simple task?!" Each vicious sentence was accentuated with a series of blows or kicks that laid Dean out cold. He wasn't sure when his father stopped…he wasn't even conscious by the end of it. His last conscious thought was that he so deserved this…__he'd__ lost Sammy… And then nothing but blackness._

_When he finally managed to claw his way back to consciousness, he was immediately assaulted with rolling waves of pain ratcheting through his body in time with his heartbeat. And that rib that 'hadn't' been broken? Well, it was definitely broken now and it had some friends too. His face was a throbbing mass as he tried to roll over and succeeded only in pissing off his injured ribs. He groaned as he bit down on his lower lip and slowly pushed himself to his knees, ignoring the pain pulsing through him. Blood had run into his right eye and he could tell that it was already swelling shut and that he'd have one hell of a shiner in addition to his aching body. 'That isn't going to be easy to explain…' He thought around the pulsing of his head. Probably a concussion too, if his rolling stomach was anything to go by._

_"Don't cry about it, Dean. You earned that beating." His father said coldly from where he sat at the table, reading a paper and drinking a cup of coffee. There was absolutely no remorse in the man…he didn't care that his son was having difficulty just staying conscious._

_Dean couldn't believe it…his little brother was missing and his father was sitting around like nothing was wrong. What the hell? He didn't say a word as he hauled himself into the bathroom and slowly shut the door, hoping that he wouldn't inadvertently set off his father again. He felt his knees wobble as he finally sank onto the toilet and reached for the nearest towel. One of good thing about cheap motels…small bathrooms. He was able to reach the sink and soak the towel so he could get to work cleaning himself up. He knew that the sight of what his father had done would only piss that man off further…and he didn't think that he could take another 'beating' this soon. Besides, they needed to concentrate on finding Sammy and then his father could focus on 'punishment'._

_By the time they'd tracked Sam down almost two weeks later, Dean was a walking mass of healing bruises and anguished thoughts. He hadn't even had the nerve to yell at the kid…although their father hadn't had that compunction. He'd torn Sam a new one for his 'little excursion'. Sam had been so focused on his own anger at being 'called out' for his decision that he'd ignored the condition of his older brother. He'd focused on his own rage and ignored what was right in front of his face._

XXXX

Dean was still seated with his thoughts so far in the past that he didn't even hear the door when Sam returned. He did however jump when Sam gently touched his shoulder, trying to get his attention. He struck out blindly and caught Sam unguarded on the jaw with a right upper cut. Sam stumbled backwards, his hands going immediately to his jaw.

"What the hell, Dean?!" He cried as he regained his balance and stared at his brother in surprise. Sam saw the immediate remorse and guilt surge into Dean's face as he realized that he'd just _clocked_ his brother in the face.

"Sorry…sorry Sam…" He said as he looked in Sam's general direction. He was twisting his hands and wringing them together as he shifted uncomfortably.

Sam released a long breath and then walked over to grab the bag of donuts and the coffee and set them next to his brother and carefully put the coffee in his hands. "It's fine Dean. I shouldn't have surprised you." He sank into a chair and looked at Dean as he pulled the hot liquid to his lips and drank back the bitter brew. "Hey, I uh…sorry I took so long. I followed this girl…one that I met when I left during the whole Scarecrow thing…"

Dean glanced up in his direction and waited for Sam to continue. "And…?"

"Well, Dean it's a bit of a coincidence…running into her here. I think she'd been trailing us. So I followed her to this old warehouse on the outskirts of town…and there was some really funky shit in that place. Like stuff to summon…something." He watched as Dean absorbed the information.

"Like a demon…something?" Dean asked.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, I think so Dean. Are your eyes good enough to check this out later?" He wasn't sure how much Dean was actually seeing and how much was just blurry. But he needed backup for this and Dean was it…with the loss of their father, _the guilt flared at the thought of his father and he pushed it down ruthlessly._

Dean thought for only a fraction of second before he lied to Sam. "It's getting better. I think I'll be fine to check this thing out tonight. I just might not be able to take point." He added, hoping that it would placate Sam and make believe the load of crap that Dean was shoveling his way.

"Okay…I'll pull up the schematics and see if I learn a bit more about the place and then we can plan to check out what the hell this bitch is doing there." Sam said as he took a drink of his own coffee. He didn't know if Dean was being honest with him, but he hoped that he was. This really wasn't the time or the place for them to be keeping secrets, the developments with his 'psychic thing' and Dean's own destiny were playing havoc with the last remaining Winchesters. They needed to find this demon and it seemed like this girl might be a way to do that. Because, honestly Sam was tired of having this whole 'demon-blood' coming back and biting his family in the ass...and he was going to figure out how to stop it.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _I want to work some of the other demons into the story to flesh it out and this will be an odd combination of canon hunt and some AU style stuff. Dean's eyes are a problem…but they will heal and the boys will keep moving forward._

**Please Review: They really do keep me pushing story forward and I have some cool ideas for this one.**


	26. What Dean Sees

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._**

**Chapter 26**

_What Dean Sees_

Dean was using every piece of foul language he'd ever learned inside his head as he twisted to look for Sam. The room seemed to be large with a really old funky smell wafting through it and making his gut roll in distaste. This hadn't gone at all like they'd planned. Although, to be fair they pretty much never _planned _to be caught by the things they hunt. And yet…it still seemed to happen…currently, t_hey_ were both tied securely to posts inside of the old warehouse that they'd been checking out. His head hurt slightly where he'd taken a blow to the temple from something that he'd didn't even see. Sam too, had been taken out by the 'shadow things'…but as he swiveled his pounding head in different directions, he caught sight of something in the corner that made his breath catch. He still couldn't see too well_, he knew this_, his vision was still blurry and extremely unpredictable…but he could see whatever was over there clearly. _And it was fugly!_

Large billowing shapes with razor sharp claws that were at least eight inches in length…faces that were pieces of skin and muscle that was simply hanging from the bones…he shuddered at the remembered sight of their undead faces. Everything surrounding the shadows had shimmered and was completely fuzzy…but their visage? He could see them clearly and they were some of the ugliest things that Dean had ever seen…and he'd seen a lot. But what had thrown him for a loop was that _Sam_ couldn't see them. He'd followed his brother's large blurry form, trying his best to give the backup that Sam had needed for this hunt…obviously his 'backup' skills were rusty judging by their current situation. Of course Sam had figured out fairly quickly that Dean had kinda exaggerated his current visual acuity…and he'd been pissed…to say the least. But damn-it! If Sam needed something then Dean was going to do everything humanly possible to make sure that he had it.

"Dean?" Sam called from off to his left. Dean's head swung in that direction and he took in the blurry blob of his little brother. He was seated and slightly slumped, if the light and dark shadows that Dean was seeing were correct. Dean didn't know how badly Sam had gotten hit, he'd been several steps behind his brother when the creatures had glided over the floor and slammed into the Winchesters. The ferocity of the attack was unlike anything that they'd face to date…so the chances were pretty good that these little bastards were demons of some kind.

"You okay Sam?" He asked through his dry throat as he struggled with the bindings, finding that they were secured very tightly and all he succeeded in doing was chaffing his wrists. He sighed and leaned his head back against the pillar and focused on breathing through his pounding head.

"Yeah…I think so. You?" Sam asked immediately. Dean didn't even have a chance to answer before something caught his 'hunters' senses and he went stock still and silent. And then Dean heard it…footsteps that definitely were heading in their direction…they were light and sounded feminine. _Yeah, cuz now you can tell the gender based on the sound of the footstep…_ He thought with derision.

"Dean Winchester…Your reputation precedes you. Although, I must say…it really was over rated." She chuckled as she squatted down in front of him and her small hand's tilted his head from left to right as she studied his face. He twisted his chin out of her cold fingers and glared in her general direction. "Saucy…I like that in my victims." Dean was speechless as he stared at the girl…there was something 'inside' her. The edges of her body were barely holding together, while he couldn't make out what she looked like…he could see _something _else. She said as she stood and shifted to where Sam was tied. "And the boy king…Sammy. Been a while." She cooed as she settled herself in his lap, leaning in and running her tongue along his neck. Ending at his lips and capturing them in a cold kiss. He tried to twist his face away from her, but she was holding his head steady and…_damn…_She was strong.

"Not long enough bitch." Sam shot out angrily, as soon as she pulled away and reached up to push his hair out of his eyes. His gaze was drawn to where his brother was seated, listening to everything that Meg said to him. There was a steady line of blood leaking from the corner of Dean's right eyebrow where he must have hit it when the shadow's had taken him down. Sam hadn't escaped without getting bloody too. He had several gashes in his cheek that were still bleeding sluggishly; he glared daggers at the blonde girl straddling his thighs. "Get the fuck off me." He said in a cold deadly voice. She raised brown eyes to meet his steely blue-green gaze and shrugged as she stood up and walked back over to Dean.

She tilted her head then leaning in, bit at his ear as he pulled his head away from her almost violently. "Don't fucking touch me bitch!" he cried. His heart speeding up as he watched the shadows start to shift on the opposite wall, like they were debating on finishing what they'd started. The girl must have been controlling them through the ritual…he knew that meant that there was an alter…he racked his brain trying to remember what Bobby had told him about summoning rituals. _'If you can destroy the alter…it breaks the binding link with the summoned creature.'_

"You know…Azazel said you guys were tough and that I needed to watch myself with you…but you know what? He was wrong. There's no way that it can be you two…you're both far too weak to live up to his expectations of you." She leaned back into Dean and grabbed his face, as she had Sam, and pressed her icy cold lips against his and kissed him as he struggled to pull away again. "Well…you boys aren't nearly as much fun as I'd hoped you'd be…so…I guess we'll just let my friends here finish what they started earlier." She said as she pulled her lips away with a 'pop' and then smiled at Sam, only then did she finally reach up to gently rub the pedant hanging from her neck.

Sam had managed to pull his boot knife and was just finishing sawing through his bindings when she stepped closer to him once more. In a flash of activity, Sam pulled his large frame upright and then grabbed Meg, slamming her head into the post. She went down instantly.

"Sam! The alter!" Dean cried as he tried to watch the shimmery-blob that represented his brother and catching sight of the crystal clear images of the shadows as they started moving toward Sam. "Hurry Sam!" He called again. The desperation and the helplessness bleeding into his rough voice.

Sam darted for the table and managed to push it over, scattering the ritual pieces all over the concrete floor. Dean watched in fascination as the shadows dissipated almost immediately and he was only able to see the shimmering and yet still blurry form of Sam. Sam's form moved quickly toward him and Dean watched in horror as the shadows reappeared and then grabbed at Meg's legs hauling her back toward the plate glass window and tossed her through it like a pale of dirty water. Sam was frozen as he saw the woman dragged past him, her screams of rage filling the air until they were silenced by the unforgiving street three stories below them.

"Sam, untie me." Dean demanded as he twisted so that his brother could get to his bindings. A few minutes later, Dean was following his brother's broad blurry form down the stairs toward the back door. Whatever he was seeing, it was scaring the holy loving crap out of him…before they'd gone into that warehouse he'd only seen Sam as a blob…but now there was a shimmer to that blob that gave it definition and more form. It wasn't as clear as what he'd seen with the shadow's, but there was definitely something happening to him…and somehow it was affected by Sam as well.

By the time they made it back to the motel room both boys were shaking with the adrenaline from their encounter. Sam couldn't understand how Dean had been able to see the shadows, when he himself couldn't see them. He stared at his brother's slumped form. Sam had been questioning his older brother, trying to determine how Dean had known where the shadows were and that they would go after Meg if he destroyed the alter. Dean was sitting on the edge of the bed, his head resting on his hands and his elbow's being supported by his knees. "I don't know Sam…" he repeated for like the seventh time. He'd been telling Sam that he didn't know why he could see the shadows…but it didn't seem as though his brother was inclined to believe him. _Sam_ was the one with _the psychic_ powers in the Winchester family, not Dean…so why could _he_ see the supernatural things…and his brother couldn't? "Maybe we should call Bobby and get his opinion on this?" Dean suggested. Because frankly? He was out of ideas and the old hunter might know something that they didn't. _Scratch that…he definitely would know something we don't._ Dean thought silently.

Sam stopped pacing long enough to really look at his brother. Dean's posture was bent and it was obvious that he was in at least some pain. But he was still looking in Dean's direction hoping for some sort of miracle explanation. That _whatever this_ was…the strange things that were going on _with both of them_, could be halted in their tracks…because this shit was getting out of control.

Dean hadn't told Sam everything…he'd told him he could see the shadows…but he hadn't told Sam that that he could see something inside the girl as well. It looked like it had been shoved inside the outline of the woman he'd called Meg…and 'it' didn't fit very well. The edges of her 'form' were shaky like the body could barely hold in the shadow inside her. Dean didn't know what any of this shit meant…and he wasn't about to burden his brother with a weird coincidence that he knew nothing about…at least not until he had to. There was something else too…since the encounter with the shadow's in the warehouse, Dean was seeing an odd shimmer that surrounded his little brother. He had no clue what it meant, but it would scare the hell out of Sam if he told him. What was weird was that Dean wasn't really 'seeing' anything else. His vision was still blurry beyond belief and he could barely differentiate between light and dark. But within the light and dark blobs…he was now seeing the distinct rainbow colored shimmering that surrounded his brother.

And that realization might have been the scariest thing he'd ever seen…or not seen as the case seemed to be. The shadows had been all darkness and razor sharp edges that would haunt his sleeping nightmares for years to come…but Sam? He was shimmery colored darkness and kinda pretty. But again, Dean would be damned to hell before he admitted that anyone.

"Dean…I know there is something that you aren't telling me…please. I can't help you if won't talk to me man." Sam was getting desperate and he knew that it was bleeding over into his voice at this point. He wanted…no needed Dean to tell him what he'd experienced. Because at least this way…maybe they could save each other.

"Sam…for the last time. I don't know what happened in that warehouse. I was able to see the shadows…I'm assuming they were some kind of demon at this point…but I still can't see anything else. I don't know why…so stop trying to 'Dr. Phil' me and let's get cleaned up and get some food. Please." Dean almost never said please and he never used it when talking with Sam. So this got his brother's attention along with the pleading tone that Dean had adopted recently.

Sam narrowed his eyes as his brain went into overdrive. His brother was able to see these demons…demons that no one else could. _Well, that's just great…_What does that mean for us? And him…? Well, he had visions of bad shit…yup, just two totally normal American males…NOT!

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _This is a builder chapter. This development with Dean came to me as I was determining whether to fix his eyes or run with a different idea. Guess which one won out. Next chapter will be longer and Meg will be back in the near future along with a witch that has plans for the boys._

**Please Review: I appreciate them and they motivate me.**


	27. Destiny, Diners, and Danger

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash.**__** Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._** Thank you to all who reviewed the last Chapter, it was so great to see that so many of you are still interested in this story continuing. Thanks to anyone that was a 'guest' reviewer and everyone that took the time. :)

**Chapter 27**

_Destiny, Diners, and Danger_

Sam watched his brother with a sense of trepidation as he was seated silently in the passenger's seat of the Impala as they past yet another nameless motel. He knew that they would need to stop soon; the burn of exhaustion behind his eyes was a definite indication of that need. Both he and Dean were tired and still a little beat up by the events from several days ago. He glanced over once more and watched as Dean continued to stare out the window at the passing countryside. Sam knew that his eyesight was still off, so there was no way that he was actually seeing the fields that they were flying by on the highway to 'nowhere'. At least that was how he felt.

Something was definitely up with his older brother though. Dean had been very quiet since the shadow demons had attacked them and then tossed Meg out the window of that warehouse and it was starting to worry him somewhat. While it wasn't that unusual for his brother to be less than open with him about how a hunt affected him…it wasn't normal for this complete silence to fill up the inside of the car like smoke. At least it seemed unusual to him after being apart for so many years. He felt the familiar pangs of regret flash through him as he once again thought of their long term separation. Once again finding himself wondering how many things had changed about his brother over the years. Well, he'd spent at least one of those years confined to a wheelchair and every other one being beaten by their father. That thought had Sam seeing red almost immediately. He hated that his brother had had ot go through that…and he hated that he been responsible…at least on some level…for the actions of their father.

When they'd been younger, he almost couldn't stand the vibrant energy that his brother exuded after a hunt…on the way to a hunt…or during a hunt for that matter. It had been one of the things that royally irritated him when he'd been a teenager. But now? Looking at the silent and contemplative form of his brother…he missed that side of Dean. He really did. Because this person seated next to him was different than the brother he'd grown up with. This 'Dean' wasn't rash and quick react to situations; he thought things out and sought the best solution rather than the quickest fix…and that was a 180 from how he'd been when they were younger. It was weird that now it was Sam that was more likely to rush head long into a situation with less than all the facts when it used to be Dean. He had become more like his brother…and his brother had become more like he'd been before Stanford.

Sam pulled his eyes back to the road just as Dean's cell phone started to play Metallica's 'Enter Sandman' softly from his jacket pocket. Dean reached for the phone, feeling his way around until his fingers closed around the small device and pulled it free. Normally, he would have been looking at the screen for a caller ID, but with his eyes being still mostly 'blind'….Dean wouldn't have been able to make out the number anyways. So he simply popped open the flip phone.

"Hello?" He said. Dean's voice was rough from his self-imposed silence and there was a weary resignation to it that made Sam look in his direction in concern. The changes in Dean kept surprising him…the things that he had gone through, alone, over the last four years had changed his brother at an almost fundamental level.

"Dean…how are you boys?" Bobby asked. His own voice a bit on the rough side from being up most of the night researching the problem with Dean's eyes…and the whiskey he'd drank before making this call...he'd never heard of this kind of thing; at least not outside of the psychics that he knew. The kid had called him the other night asking him about 'second sight' and how that works. Bobby knew that there was something going on with the elder Winchester brother…_Hell, when wasn't there something going on with the boy…at least lately? _When he'd confronted Dean about his evasive answers, the kid had broken down and told him about the vision thing that had started when they were attacked in that damned warehouse. Bobby had been more than a little surprised to find out that Dean had been saddled with yet another type of disability. But the worst discovery was that whatever was affecting him; it was also being triggered when Sam and was around and that was terrifying Dean. There weren't a lot of things that really and truly scared the older Winchester brother, but anything that dealt with Sam and the yellow-eye demon…well that was simply on whole nother level of fear for the boy.

"Oh…hey Bobby." Dean answered quickly. He hoped that the quick turn around on the phone call meant that the older hunter had found something that explained this new and extremely disconcerting 'ability'. He didn't want to see things in Sam that weren't there and he sure as hell didn't want to be saddled with the inability to see anything but the supernatural things that they hunted. He didn't know how far this thing extended with regards to the monsters that they generally hunted. He knew that he could see demons…and something in or around Sam. But he had yet to see it attributed to other types of creepy-crawlies that they dealt with as hunters. He shifted slightly in his seat and looked out the window, his voice getting lower as he tried to think of how he could talk about this without Sam realizing that they were talking about _him_. "Find anything out?"

Bobby huffed on his end of the line. "Course…wouldn't have called you if I hadn't…idgit."

"Okay…okay… Well, don't keep me in suspense here…what does this mean?" Dean ran his hand through his hair and down his stubbled face as he listened to Bobby's explanation of this 'problem' that he'd developed.

"Well, far as I can tell…its part of that twin destinies thing." Bobby heard Dean sigh in frustration and he could picture the irritated expression on the kids face. "When you got hit hard enough to mess with your normal sight…a sorta 'second sight' manifested that would allow you to identify the demons and other supernatural beings that would want to harm you…it has to do with you being the polar opposite of what they want Sam for. You're the light…and he's…well, not the light." Bobby paused before he threw out this last comment, because Dean was not going to take this part well. "One of those things that might want to hurt you could be….being the other half of the destiny curse…or in other words…" Bobby knew he was rambling, but he didn't want to have to say this out loud. He didn't necessarily believe in the whole twin-destiny thing, but it was getting harder to convince himself that there wasn't something to the whole thing. The more he delved into the mythology…the less he wanted to know.

Dean cut him off with a resigned whisper. "Sam…" he breathed into the phone as his heart seized at the thought that he might _ever_ need protection _from Sam_. "That can't be right Bobby." He said quietly. His green eyes flickering in the direction of the driver's seat, where Sam was carefully watching the road, although all Dean could see was the continued dark shimmer of his brother's outline and the direction of his head…straight forward. _And listening to everything I say._ Dean thought as fear raced through him at the magnitude of the information that Bobby had just given him. "What does all this actually mean Bobby?"

"I think it means that the curse…destiny…whatever you want to call it…isn't totally broken Dean. Or at the very least, there is another witch still out there and they're working with the yellow-eyed demon to get what it wants from Sam…and you." Bobby poured through the remainder of the information that he'd acquired over the last 48 hours and tried to break the news as easily as possible to Dean. But really…how did you tell a person that their brother…the one they'd raised for the whole of their lives…was possibly the anti-christ in human form? Because yeah…somehow he'd missed that whole segment in 'Demon-Hunters Quarterly'.

Now Sam was looking worriedly in Dean's direction. He didn't like the direction this conversation was going…his brother had lost what little color he had in his face and the hand holding his phone against his ear was shaking. Whatever their friend had told him…Dean didn't like it one little bit…and from the looks of his body language…he was on the verge of panicking. Although in all the years that they'd been together…Sam had _never_ seen his older brother panic before. And frankly the fact that he'd only been on the phone with Bobby for like five minutes and the older hunter had gotten _this_ reaction out of Dean? Well that didn't bode well for them.

"I don't give a rats ass what they _want_…they're gonna be real disappointed when they don't get it. Nothing is going to happen to us Bobby." Dean said as he struggled to put on a strong but passive mask, since he knew that he'd be explaining this whole conversation to Sam later. With him in the car there was absolutely no way for that conversation to be avoided. Much as Dean wished it could be. His 'no chick Flickr moments' was really taking a beating lately.

XXXX

"So this is all happening because of me?" Sam said in breathy voice as he paced their motel room, long legs eating up the small distance from ine side to the other, Dean had refused to explain what Bobby had said until they had stopped for the night. He knew that his little brother was not going to take this information well. Dean was still leaving out the part where he could 'see' something weird about Sam…he wasn't ready to open that can of worms just yet. But he had explained what the older hunter had said about the vision and the existence of this strange sight he'd developed. Sam suddenly snorted and a laugh erupted unbidden from deep in his chest. "I guess I'm not the only freak in our family am I?"

Dean's eyes widened at the comment and since he couldn't see how sincere the laugh was, he ended up only cracking a smile at the quip. "Told you before Sammy…we're all freaks. That's why we get along."

Sam barked another laugh and Dean found himself smirking in response. "Hey, I'm starving and we passed a diner up the road about ten miles…you hungry?" Sam actually sounded a little better, so Dean guessed that the laughter had been a genuine response.

Dean smoothed a hand down his face and nodded. Which was the first time he'd felt real hunger in weeks, so far he'd only been eating enough to pacify his little brother's constantly watchful eye. It was so weird that their roles seemed to have reversed since they'd started hunting together again. He wasn't all that sure that he liked the direction of this new relationship. He was still the oldest…and it was still his job to protect Sam. He needed to figure out how to re-reverse their self-assigned duties...pretty quickly.

"Uh…yeah, I'm actually pretty hungry." Dean said quietly. He was trying to look into Sam's eyes, but as Sam looked over at his brother, he noticed that Dean's eyes were slightly south of his own face and he shook his head in frustration. Something about Dean's iris's caught his attention and had him stepping closer to the seated from of the older Winchester.

Dean's eyes had always been green, a pretty decent shade of the color and one that had garnered him more attention than he'd known what to do with when he'd been younger. But as Sam stared at his brother now…he noticed that Dean's eyes were an almost supernatural shade of green. They were bright near the pupil and deepened into a dark almost forest green at the edges near the whites of his eyes. They had never been this color before…so whatever was happening to his brother it was affecting him on a cellular level. Because there was no other explanation for the changes to Dean's iris's.

"Uh Dean…?" He hesitated.

Dean shifted when he realized that Sam had stepped closer to him and was now only a few feet away from his face. "Personal space Sammy." He said as he leaned back, creating some distance between them.

"You're eyes Dean…" Sam said quietly as he stared at the surprise that registered on his brother's face a moment later.

"Yeah? What about them? I mean I know I'm irrresitable...but..." Dean said quickly as he continued to lean slightly further away from Sam. "Seriously Sam, it's not like I can see them or anything." Irritation filtered into his raspy voice as he waited for his brother to get the hint and back the hell up.

"They've changed color….I mean…they've gone even more green…almost glowy." Sam answered in a strained voice. His own blue-green gaze shifting from eye to eye as he continued to stare at his brother in disbelief.

"Glowy?" Dean snorted again. "Is that a technical term?" But the fact that his brother was now seeing a physical manifestation of this 'ability' worried Dean.

"Haha Dean. But like…no they're just brighter and look...I don't know...different." Sam said as he finally stepped back from his brother's now passive expression.

"I think I remember Bobby saying that that could happen." Dean lied easily. He didn't want Sam to see how much another unexpected problem had rattled him.

Sam tilted his head to the side and contemplated whether or not he thought his brother was lying to him. He determined that even if Dean _was_ lying to him…there was no way for him to prove it, so he might as well just shut up….for now. "Fine….let's just go get some food." He remarked as he grabbed his jacket off his own bed and waited for Dean to stand up.

Dean unfolded his legs from beneath him and felt for the edge of the bed with his calves before pulling himself to his feet and following the shimmery form of his little brother out of the motel and back to the car. He could tell that the sun was setting, because the shadows were more difficult to pick out as he trudged along behind Sam. It was going against every fiber of his being to let Sam take point…even if all they were doing was walking to the car. He sighed as he reached out and gently ran his fingers along the smooth metal of the Impala and used her lines to help him walk to the passenger door, sliding inside when he heard Sam pop the lock from the inside of the car.

They pulled into the diner about fifteen minutes later and Dean actually found that his mouth was watering at the smell of the fries and what he assumed were awesome burgers that would be drenched in grease and flavor, but would taste amazing…especially with extra onions. "Nice pick Sammy." He said as Sam positioned him so he could slide into the booth that the waitress had taken them to. Her eyes had immediately gone to Dean as she noticed that he wasn't looking anywhere in particular. A look of sympathy passed over her face and Sam was suddenly grateful that his brother couldn't see it…because if he could, they would have been right back out in the car without anything to eat. Dean hated the sympathetic and pitying looks that he'd been given over the last year…and to see that once again on the faces of regular citizens made Sam angry.

When Dean heard the waitress walk away after taking their drink order, he turned in Sam's general direction. "She was staring at me wasn't she." He said. It wasn't even a question, more like a resigned observation.

Sam exhaled loudly and ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I think she was just checking you out." Sam said as evenly as he could. If Dean had been able to see his eyes, he would have known instantly that his little brother was lying to him.

"Sure she was…" Dean said and Sam knew instantly that his brother didn't believe a word he'd just uttered.

Dean ran his eyes over the shadows and the flickering lights that were interspersed throughout the small country diner. His gaze was caught by something sitting at what he could only assume was a counter. The form had less of a glimmer, like Sam, than a weird fuzzy outline to the body. As Dean continued to stare at the man, he was surprised to see that once again, he could make out the features of the guy clearly. Just as he'd been able to with the…_Uh-oh…_demons.

"Sam…the guy at the counter…is he staring at us?" Dean asked as he looked away for a moment and then back again, just to make sure that he was really seeing what he thought he was seeing.

Sam's eyes followed his brother's gaze and he was caught off guard to see a young man…about Dean's age probably, staring directly at them…well at Dean. "Uh…yeah. How did you know that?"

"I can see him…" Dean answered without moving a muscle.

"You're eyes are better?" Sam asked quickly, his own gaze flickering over to his older brother.

"No…but I can _see_ him…same way I could see those demons and you couldn't…Sammy I don't think the guy is completely human." Dean said as he used his peripheral vision to continued watching the dark haired guy.

"Oh…" Sam said. He watched as the man pulled his wallet out and left a tip on the table, nodding at the waitress as he stood up to leave the diner.

"Thanks Becky." He said and then slipped from the restaurant into the encroaching darkness.

"That was weird." Sam said as he watched his brother start to rise from their booth. "Whoa….where are you going Dean?" He hadn't meant to come off sounding as paranoid as it apparently did as Dean threw him an aggravated look.

"I gotta take a leak Sam. You wanna come hold it for me?" Dean couldn't quite stop the retort as he felt his frustration at being 'mothered' by his brothee lurch to the surface. He knew that Sam was now probably sporting one of his infamous 'bitch-faces', probably number 12, and that he wouldn't be at all impressed by Dean's flippant remark. But damn-it…he wasn't helpless…and Sam needed to realize that or they would never be able to continue hunting together. Assuming they both made it out of this whole destiny thing...he knew that Sam would...he'd make sure of that. But him? Dean wasn't as confident in his own chances.

"Nice jerk…No I was just asking jackass." Sam shot back and then ignored his brother's rolling eyes.

"Whatever bitch...Can you just tell me which direction? And let's avoid any 'helpful' tidbits." Dean answered evenly.

"You know what? Whatever Dean. Follow the wall, it's on the left." Sam said, even though what he wanted to do was punch his brother in the mouth. That wasn't going to solve anything…but it would make Sam feel a little better…until he had time to think about it and then he would simply be adding more guilt to the already alarmingly big load he carried. And Dean thought he held the monopoly on guilt...not so much.

"Thanks." Dean muttered as he felt his way along the smooth wall. He closed the distance to the bathroom quickly, and found he was finally able to see the shadow of the entryway. He pushed the door open and the light immediately gave him a better idea where he was and where things were at.

He was just pulling the zipper up on his jeans when a cloth covered his mouth and his world spun as he collapsed on the floor. "Yeah…you'll be fun to wear for a bit." A male voice said as he dragged the unconscious form out of the bathroom and then out the back entrance of the diner. He didn't want the other guy that was with him to realize he was gone…not just yet. That all came later…he smiled to himself as he loaded the unconscious form of the guy into the trunk of his car and locked it.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _New supernatural beastie to deal with here. This one isn't about torturing Dean, so don't worry about him getting hurt worse than he already is…but there will be some pretty decent reveals in the next chapter as a result of this particular monster._

**Please Review: I actually crave the things….like Dean and pie…so please like a piece of blueberry pie with the ice cream on top?**


	28. Dean, You can't Hide Anymore

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash. Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._** Thank you to all who reviewed the last Chapter, it was so great to see that so many of you are still interested in this story continuing. Thanks to anyone that was a 'guest' reviewer and everyone that took the time. :)

**Chapter 28**

_Dean, You Can't Hide everything from Sam anymore..._

Sam was just starting to get up to find out what was keeping Dean when he saw his brother exit the bathroom…his gaze wandering as he looked around the area. Inwardly Sam groaned as he was once again reminded that his brother couldn't see very well. _When were they gonna catch a break?_ He settled back against the seat and picked up his water as Dean slid in across from him.

"Thought you might have fallen in…" Sam said with a raised eyebrow. Dean snorted and grabbed his own mug of coffee, slurping it back as he ignored Sam's comment. "Seriously dude…what took you so long?" Dean shrugged and stayed silent. Sam narrowed his eyes at his brother as some internal alarms started going off. "Okay…what gives Dean. You're not exactly the strong silent type."

Dean finally raised his eyes and met Sam's confused gaze…and _that _should have been Sam's first indicator that something was definitely off about his big brother. "Anyone ever tell you, you're awfully pushy, princess?" His hands dropped to his lap and he stared directly at Sam, waiting for a response.

Sam almost chocked on his water as he set it down and gaped at his brother in surprise. "What?" He said as he wiped water off his chin with a napkin.

Dean continued to stare at him in a relaxed manner and now Sam's brain was screaming at him that there was something _very_ off about his brother. And that was when he noticed it…Dean's eyes weren't just looking directly at him…but they were his normal shade of green again, the soft emerald color that Sam had seen his entire life. A color they hadn't been since Dean's accident and the warehouse in Chicago.

Sam came quickly to his feet, hands grasping Dean's leather jacket and hauling him to his own feet. He dragged the surprised form of his older brother out the front glass door and around the corner where no one would see them. "Who the hell are you? What have you done with my brother?" He whispered vehemently as he glared into the subtle differences of his 'brother's' eyes. A slow smile spread across the creature's smooth face as he reached up and roughly yanked Sam's fingers out his…or rather Dean's…jacket.

"Oh…he's around." It said as the eyes flared a silver color and Sam stumbled away, trying to put some distance between himself and whatever was currently standing in front of him…wearing his brother's form. _Shape shifter…_His brain supplied easily…and that meant a silver bullet or knife to the heart. Concern also flared to life as Sam realized that he had absolutely no idea where the hell his _actual_ brother was.

The shape shifter suddenly grabbed his shoulders, fingers pushing painfully into the muscles and slammed Sam into the brick wall of the diner, his head connecting with the red brick before Sam understood what was happening…He slid to the ground as consciousness faded and his last thought was concern for his missing…and mostly blind…big brother.

XXXX

One of the things that Dean hated was waking up after being knocked out. He hated the cotton feeling in his mouth and the fuzziness of his eyesight…oh yeah…that wasn't going away any time soon. He shifted trying to assess any injuries and found that beyond having his hands taped behind his back…he was actually injury free. He looked at the dark area and determined that he was either in a box…or the trunk of a car…either way he didn't want to be here. His mouth was covered in the same utility tape, the taste of the adhesive making his stomach roll with unease; at least he assumed that it was the same type of tape…that was securing his hands. He groaned as he shifted the uncomfortable position and pulled his legs up behind himself, wriggling his fingers into the top of his boot. He nearly sighed with relief when his fingers closed around the warm handle of his knife. He pulled until it was held securely in his right hand and then he carefully flipped it over and began the slow process of sawing through the binding.

His mind kept shifting to Sam and what in the hell the shifter could possibly want with his little brother. Or was this another trick by the yellow-eyed demon…he'd known that he could see something off about the man in restaurant…but he hadn't been able to discern what it was. And now as Dean thought back…he wondered if it was more than just demons that he could see with this _sight_ thing of his. The thought of it having gone after Sam without him there as backup, had Dean struggling faster as soon as he felt the pressure release and his hands popped apart. The release of the tension on his shoulder felt great as he pulled them carefully in front of his chest and then turned so that he was looking up. _Yup, definitely the trunk of a car…_he thought quickly.

He felt around searching for an emergency release latch…relief flooding through him as he finally felt the plastic 'T' shaped handle and when pulling it caused the trunk lid to pop open. He pushed up with his hands and then pulled himself out of the car…his arms aching from the awkward positioning they'd been in. He waited for a moment as his eyes adjusted to the low light and then he swore as he realized that he'd been unconscious for several hours.

He cast his fuzzy sight in all directions looking for the Impala…he'd known that Sam had parked close to the restaurant and it appeared as though he was still there. He stumbled toward the entrance and found that he couldn't even make out the faces of the people in the damn place. "Damn-it Sammy." He muttered when he didn't see his gargantuan of a younger brother's _shimmery_ presence anywhere.

Dean turned and rushed from the restaurant, his feet eating up the pavement as he made his way to where he could barely make out the lines of his beloved Impala. But as he grabbed the handle, he realized that he didn't have the keys to his baby….Sam did. And even if he did…he couldn't drive it. He couldn't see well enough to do that…Dean wanted to punch something….anything…the rage and frustration building to a breaking point inside his chest. He stepped away from the classic car before he did something he would regret.

How the hell was he supposed to search for his missing brother when he couldn't even see enough to know what he was looking for?

XXXX

Sam felt the pounding in his head before he had any inclination to actually open his eyes…there was a dull ache on the back where he'd hit the bricks of the restaurant. He tried to move; wanting to rub the spot where he was sure he would have a pretty decent bump forming and he was surprised when he realized that he was tied up, like Thanksgiving turkey. His hands pulled behind his back, secured at the wrists and everything including his neck was tied up with rope. He groaned as he remembered the flare of the eyes in the light…freaking shape shifters.

"So glad you're awake, Sammy." The thing wearing Dean's likeness said as it stepped up and stared at the younger Winchester in interest.

"It's Sam." He shot back without even thinking.

The thing laughed. "Oh, that's right I forgot that you hate to be called Sammy." It looked at him and then stepped back, grabbing a large knife and twirling it in its hands as it watched Sam sit up a little straighter. The slight fear that it saw in his eyes making its blood sing with anticipation. "Man…you two sure have a lot more problems than the average dysfunctional family." Dean's…_no…its_….voice was deep and taunting as it continued to circle Sam's secured form.

"Me and my brother get along fine." Sam said angrily. He hated that the thing thought that it knew them because it was 'wearing' Dean's body.

"Yeah right…" It said as it squatted down in front of Sam, looking at him with interest. "If that's true then why didn't he tell you that when he 'sees' these weird auras around things…he sees it around you too?" It watched closely for the reaction that it knew was coming. It had read Dean's thoughts…just like it was supposed to…and the one thing that he didn't want Sam to know, above anything else, was that he was seeing something _off_ about his brother as well as demons and other monsters. "So….if he sees it around a demon…and around you…what does that make you Sam?"

Sam was reeling from that information. Dean had seen an aura surrounding _him_? _And he hadn't even bothered to tell him about it_? After that whole fiasco with the Croatoan virus…Sam had thought that Dean would have told him about anything weird involving him. That incident had scared the crap out of both of them…but apparently his brother didn't feel he could be trusted with this information…or else even worse…Dean thought that there _was_ something evil about him.

"You know the more I learn about you and your brother…damn you two have problems." The thing raised its hand to its temple and looked pained for a moment before speaking again. "You really left him at the mercy of your sadistic father? You know that your father spent the next three years beating the hell out of him right? Every single damn time he got drunk, he took it out on Dean. Why do you think that he has so many new scars? They didn't come from hunting…I can tell you that." And then it actually laughed. "And then he wound up in a wheelchair and you never even knew…not for an entire year? Wow! You are just little brother of the year aren't you?" It said as it looked at him over the blade of the knife, it was currently twirling on the top of one of Dean's fingers.

"You don't know anything." Sam said quietly, knowing his father had abused his brother was bad enough…but to hear it so blatantly from his 'brother's' mouth? Well that was nearly killing him inside. Having his worst failures thrown up his face like this wasn't exactly making him feel like 'brother of the year'. He already knew that he and Dean had their problems…he certainly didn't need some trash talking monster flinging it around. Sam felt the first real tingles of anger rear up in his chest as he stared at the man pretending to be his brother.

"He sure has some problems with you…" The shape shifter continued…oblivious to Sam's increasing ire. Sam shifted uncomfortably under the gaze of the man impersonating his brother. He knew he and Dean had their problems…but they were _their_ problems. And the fact that this _monster_ was pulling those memories and flogging Sam with them was making him almost as angry as it was making him feel like a piece of crap little brother. "You got to go off to school…have a normal life. _ I _had to stay with dad…didn't it ever occur to you that I might want to have a normal life?" The thing asked as it tilted Dean's head and narrowed his green eyes…and then it thrust out and slammed Dean's fist into Sam's face.

Sam's head snapped to the side and he felt stars explode behind his left eye as he grunted and then brought his angry gaze back around to the thing pretending to be his brother. The sting of the impact wasn't as bad as the underlying knowledge that there must actually be a part inside Dean that really _wanted _to punch him. Suddenly Sam had an idea what it must have been like for his brother when they'd been in that Asylum…as he himself had spewed every hateful thing that had ever briefly gone through his mind. He suddenly understood how his brother must have felt…because even though he knew…_he knew…_ that this thing wasn't saying what Dean would. There was a part of him that believed what it was saying…that maybe his brother did resent him and the choices that he'd made.

The thought that there could be even a small part of Dean that hated him…was like pouring salt in an open wound. He felt it all the way to his core and it fucking hurt…how could he have been so blind that he had missed all that? Was he so concerned with getting away from hunting that he'd ignored all the little signs…that maybe his brother had wanted the same thing too? And then he'd walked out on him…left his older brother to the angry ministrations of their father…_Oh God…_Sam thought frantically.

His blue-green eyes widened in understanding as he stared at the triumphant look on his not-brother's face. The shifter had gotten what it wanted…it had started to put doubt into the mind of the younger brother. That had been the mission after all…not to kill and not to maim…just to _educate._

Sam stared at the thing as the taunting words played over and over in his brain in perfect dolby digital sound. He heard the monster tell him that _he_ was registering on his brother's weird 'monster-radar' thing…and that he was holding a fucking huge grudge against Sam…one that Sam hadn't even known about. But to keep something like the aura-sight….from Sam? How could he do that? Dean knew how much it was killing him inside that he had demon blood coursing through his veins…and that supposedly he was _destined_ to kill his big brother…the one person in his life that had loved him in spite of everything.

The thing smiled again and then winked. "I guess my work here is done…your brother should be at the restaurant or the motel…it's not like he could have _driven_ anywhere…" It chuckled and tossed the knife just out of Sam's reach. "Once you get yourself out of here…go find him…and ask him if I lied."

And then it was gone. It just left Sam tied to the post, his mind reeling and his booted foot barely able to pull the knife toward him. He couldn't stop a million different conversations that he'd had with Dean from replaying inside his over-active brain…and it hurt…_they_ hurt.

XXXX

Dean was sitting on the edge of the Impala's trunk…he didn't know how to find Sam, he couldn't even hardly see, let alone drive. He hadn't felt this worthless since he'd watched Sam walk out on him and their father that night three years ago. He should have been stronger…should have been able to get Sam to stay. But he hadn't been…and now as Dean watched the shadows playing across the parking lot…he felt every bit as weak and useless…every bit as disposable as he had that night. His life was a series of unfortunate events…this was just one more in a long line.

First, he hadn't been able walk, so Sam had had to do more on the hunts that his fair share…then Dean had gone and gotten his eyesight screwed up…and now he had some freaky second sight thing that was worth jack shit if he needed to actually _drive_ somewhere. Or see something that wasn't a monster or a demon…and he'd never even told Sam about what he'd seen, _unless he was driving the highway to hell or something._ What the hell was wrong with him? He just kept messing up…maybe he really was just a grunt…_not good for much else_…he thought silently.

Dean brought his fingers up and run them down his face, his palms digging into his eyes as he prayed that they would stop their semi-blindness. How could he help Sam when…he couldn't even clearly see _Sam?_ And what Dean was seeing when he looked at his little brother was so confusing that he just wanted to ignore his little brother's ginormous form. The sudden ringing of his cell phone had Dean fumbling in his pocket for the small device…he flipped it open. "Sam?" He asked immediately. He knew that it was a long shot…but maybe…

"Dean?" Sam's voice was quiet, but definitely Sam.

"Sammy….thank god. Are you okay?" Dean rasped as his heart thudded wildly in his chest.

"I'm okay Dean…where are you? Are you okay?" Sam asked. Because every single damn time that he and Dean got separated…his brother managed to get the shit kicked out him…somehow.

Dean huffed at the question. "I'm fine. Where are you?"

"On my way back to the diner…you still there?"

Dean snorted. "Obviously. It's not like I can drive…and I was just debating on calling Bobby. Sorry I would have done it earlier…but the bastard locked me in the trunk of a random car."

Sam was silent for a moment before he spoke again…and Dean felt his internal big brother alarm go off. "You sure you're okay?" He glanced out at the fuzzy road, his eyes at least recognizing the changes from gravel to pavement…_huh…well at least that's an improvement._ He thought.

"Yeah…I should be there soon." Sam said. "I'll talk to you when I get there…explain what happened…it was a shape shifter Dean." His little brother's voice sounded almost haunted and Dean furrowed his eyebrows in response to that. _A shape shifter? We haven't seen one of those in years…_he racked his brain trying remember exactly the last time he _had_ seen one…it had been at least ten years. His father had killed one outside of Tulsa, Oklahoma…and the damn thing had very nearly killed John in the process.

"Yeah…okay Sammy…I'll be waiting." Dean said as he thinned his lips and shook his head. His alarm was still firing on all cylinders…so whatever had happened to Sam…it wasn't good.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _The whole point of the shape shifter was to clue Sam in on what Dean's been holding back…it is a departure from the series and there will be plenty more of those. For those of you wondering, Dean's eyes will get better slowly…but there is a reason for the ongoing blindness…that will become evident as the story progresses…yes it has something to do with the witches and the demons…_

**Please Review: I so appreciate them and they spur me on as an author…so yeah…please take the time and let me know what you think.**


	29. Power comes from Anger, Sam

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash. Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._** Thank you to all who reviewed the last Chapter, it was so great to see that so many of you are still interested in this story continuing. Thanks to anyone that was a 'guest' reviewer and everyone that took the time. :) Please forgive me if I missed PM'ing anyone I was out of town and it made it hard to get them to actually post. BUT, I did read them and I was intensely grateful that you all took the time. Thank you.

**Chapter 29**

_Power comes from Anger, Sam_

Dean was sitting quietly on the trunk of the Impala when Sam walked up. Surprisingly he hadn't been that far from the diner…but with what he'd learned…he wished he'd been in Canada. He needed more time. Sam wasn't sure how to approach this subject with his brother and was worried about setting Dean off or that he himself would be too angry and hurt to listen. As he took in the hunched shoulders and the far off look in his brother's unfocused eyes, it caused him to sigh as he closed his own eyes in frustration, drawing in a deep breath of the cool autumn air.

"Dean?" He called, alerting his brother of his presence. Sam watched closely as Dean's posture immediately shifted and he threw his worried gaze in Sam's general direction…_when the hell was his brother going to get better?_ He wondered silently. "You okay?" He asked before Dean could answer.

"Yeah…Sammy I'm fine…are you? Okay?" Dean's voice was low and filled with worry as he stared at the center of Sam's chest, instead of up at his little brother's pale face.

"Yeah, Dean…I'm fine. Can we please just head back to the motel?" Sam asked as he walked to the driver's door and held his hand out automatically for the keys. Dean immediately handed them over and felt his way around to the passenger side. Sam watched his movements carefully for any indication that Dean had been hurt by the shifter…he was relieved when he saw no pained movements readily evident in his movements.

"Why would it just let you go, Sam?" Dean said quietly as he continued to stare at his not so interesting shoes. He couldn't even see them clearly, but he knew they were there…obviously. He wanted…no…he _needed_ to know what that bastard had told his brother…had he hurt Sam? If so, Dean was going to track down that flesh-thief and rip his arms off, before he drove a silver dagger into its black heart.

Sam sighed dramatically and reached up to run his fingers through his incredibly dirty hair…yeah, thanks for that…freakin stupid shape shifter… His head hurt where the guy had punched him in the jaw and he would more than likely have a decent shiner in the morning as well…luckily Dean wouldn't be able to see it…so he could lie.

"I don't really know, Dean…he said he had some information for me…he was supposed to _educate_ me." Sam's voice was thick with emotion as he tried to push down his anger and the intense hurt he felt...that Dean wouldn't have ever told him about the weird aura thing…not without outside intervention. That hurt…a lot.

Dean's head snapped up in his direction and his face opened up as concern washed over his visage. "What do you mean _educate_ you…educate you about what?" His fingers were twisting the material of his jeans as his nervousness rose exponentially the longer Sam was quiet. "Sam! What did it mean?"

That was the last straw…Sam's thin thread of control snapped. He was suddenly careening off the side of the road, the tires of the Impala rolling over the bumpy gravel road as the car lurched to a sudden and pulse pounding stop. Dean's body had gone absolutely rigid with the sudden stop of the Impala, his hands clawing at the door and panic racing through him as old memories of their father tore away at his tentative control. His breathing was suddenly rapid and thread-like as he tried to garner some semblance of control over this irrational fear that had developed...fear of his brother.

Sam was so focused on his anger that he completely missed the total all encompassing panic that flooded through his brother. He slammed the car into 'park' and turned angry flashing eyes on his older brother. He momentarily forgot that this was the brother that _he_ was supposed to sacrifice to an eternity in Hell, if he lost control and took his brothers life in anger...Dean went straight to hell...do not pass go, do not collect $200.00…but Dean hadn't.

"You want to know what he had to say Dean? Really?" Sam shouted, the irrational anger filling with a desperate malice. His fists raising and suddenly slamming into the console, causing Dean to jump involuntarily and to shrink against the passenger side door of the car. He was desperately trying to see Sam's face…he could always tell just how angry Sam truly was by his face…but he couldn't make out anything past the blurred outline of Sam's body…but the aura was turning a brilliant bloody red at the center with blackened edges…and that wasn't something that Dean had ever seen before…and it scared him. "He said that you see that stupid aura-thing around me too…the same thing you see around demons…that you're seeing it around me too...and any other supernatural monster!"

Sam's voice was getting louder and lower the angrier he got, and the aura was shifting from shimmery to the solid black that Dean had seen around the demons…and Sam's face was getting clearer the more he yelled. "Sam…I…" Dean tried to defend his actions. But Sam cut him off with another slam of his fist, this time onto the back of the bench seat they were seated on.

"No! Dean, there is nothing you can say to justify this. You lied to me…you deliberately left me out of the loop…when you know how scary this whole thing is for me. What the fuck Dean? Don't you care about me at all? About how I feel?" Sam was so angry that he missed the slight tingle inside his head as well as the small fact that Dean's nose had started to bleed…his brother's hands shot up and grasped at the sides of his head as pain lanced through it.

"Sammy…I'm sorry…just wanted…to protect you…" Dean whispered as he felt consciousness slip and his head lolled against the passenger door, the blood running in thick rivulets down his lips and dripping onto his chest, only to be absorbed by his black t-shirt as though they never existed.

The suddenly boneless tilt of his brother's head stopped Sam's rant in its tracks…his eyes widened as he looked at the bright red blood trailing from Dean's nose and the slumped form that was breathing far too rapidly and shallowly for his comfort. It was almost like he'd been possessed, sorta the way he'd felt in the Asylum…what the hell had happened? How had he caused this frightened and bloody reaction in his brother? Guilt poured through him in enormous waves and Sam shrank against his own door as he stared at the unconscious form of his older brother. _No…no…no…no…no…_his mind kept repeating like a mantra. Maybe if he thought it enough…he could make it true…that he hadn't just somehow knocked out his brother with only his mind.

He'd been thinking about how badly he wanted to just punch Dean in the face…but he hadn't been seriously contemplating doing it…had he? Dean started to groan and then shifted slightly, his left hand coming up to cradle his aching head…_anyone get the license of that truck?_ He felt like he'd been run over and then the driver had backed up to make sure that they got the job done properly.

"Dean?" A whispered question had him pressing further into the door as he thrust panicked eyes up.

Sam's own eyes widened in shock as he looked at Dean. The most intense guilt he'd ever felt beat him down as he looked at the red eyes of his brother…both eyes had all the blood vessels broken. The intense green of Dean's pupils was surrounded not by white…but by red…and they were still as unfocused as they had ever been. "Oh…God…Dean…your eyes." He gulped when Dean looked away immediately and pulled into a small ball. "I'm so sorry Dean…I didn't mean it…I never meant to…" Sam just wanted forgiveness…

"Uh…it's okay Sam…just…let's get back to the motel okay? We both need to sleep…and I don't want to deal with this right now." Dean managed as he slowly unfolded his lengthy form and settled normally into the seat. There was a slight tremble to his hands…but Sam looked away quickly in the hopes that he wouldn't have to see Dean's eyes again.

"Okay." He said quietly. Sam wanted to talk about what had happened…because he'd just hurt his brother…and he had no idea how or why that had happened…maybe he was destined to go 'dark-side'. If that was the case how did he avoid killing his brother? Dean would be the first one to go….the first line of defense for Sam's soul…how did he protect his brother from himself?

XXXX

The blessedly warm water from the slightly loose shower head washed over Dean's sore shoulders, tension driving knots into his hard muscles, as he stared blankly at the blurry drain as something that looked suspiciously pink washed down it with the warm water. He still couldn't understand what had happened with Sam tonight. Something was different…but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. The explosive anger…well that wasn't _that _out of character for his high strung younger sibling. But injuring Dean? _That_ was completely out of character for his generally soft hearted brother.

Something had happened while that dam shifter had Sam…and it was up to Dean to find out what it was. He was staring at the shampoo bottle…it took him a moment to realize that something was different with him too…he could read the label on the bottle. He shook his head and reached up to rub his knuckles into his eyelids and then looked back at the bottle…he could still read it. His eyes were only slightly fuzzy…he could see the hot and cold symbols on the handles of the water. He could even see that the drain did have a bit of a pink hue to it.

Dean swallowed thickly and hurriedly turned off the water, grabbing a towel and wrapping around his slim waist. He ran a hand over the steam slick mirror and then stared in horror at his eyes…they were a mess. Brilliant red surrounded the normally forest colored green of the pupils…only the green was now an almost luminescent shade of green…he looked like some freak from the carnival or a haunted hayride. "Son of a bitch." He gasped, before turning and pulling the door of the bathroom open and looking frantically around for his brother.

Nothing…there was no one in the room but him. Sam's cell phone lay silent and abandoned on the table…and his duffel was missing…along with Dean's wad of cash that he'd thrown onto the bed by his pants. "Damn-it Sam!" Dean screamed into the empty room. His brother was gone…again.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _Short Chapter, I am already working on the next one and I should get that up either Sunday or Monday at the latest…so don't kill me for the cliff hanger…there's a reason I promise. There is a reason for Sam's outburst in the car...and it plays directly into the next chapter and the hunt overall._

**Please Review: I would love to know what you guys think about the mixture of Canon and that original stories that have created this work of fiction.**


	30. A Bad Sign

_Supernatural does not belong to me, although I wish it did. I am simply playing in Kripke's sandbox for a bit. All rights and ownership are the property of Kripke and the CW network. I am not making any money from this; it is for my own personal pleasure._

**_Synopsis: _**_Set at the start of Season One, Dean had been in a wheelchair since his father disappeared more than a year ago and he finally has to tell Sam… There'd been an accident that night and Dean had paid a very high price…one he still doesn't understand. The story will have some hunts from season one and possibly into season two…the brothers will continue their search for their father…there will be alterations to the hunts to accommodate Dean's new situation. I have every intention of returning Dean to good health before this ends…but getting there is going to be bumpy._

_Please keep in mind that I do not have a Beta, so all grammatical errors are my own. __**Not Slash. Brotherly love and Angst only…**_

**_Please Review: They keep me motivated. This is my sad little plea for feedback..._** Thank you to all who reviewed the last Chapter, it was so great to see that so many of you are still interested in this story continuing. Thanks to anyone that was a 'guest' reviewer and everyone that took the time. :) Please forgive me if I missed PM'ing anyone I was out of town and it made it hard to get them to actually post. Thank you.

Also, this chapter contains Dean whumpage galore, so be prepared...and yes, it is necessary to the stories progression. :)

**Chapter 30**

_A Bad Sign_

It had been one week since Sam had run out on Dean and he was literally going out of his mind with worry. He'd called Ellen, who had absolutely no useful insights…neither had Ash, Bobby, or anyone else that he'd contacted. He was currently standing out in the rain, somewhere in Missouri, trying to find a cellphone signal and racking his brain for anyone else he could possibly call. His eyesight was almost back to normal, which made the fact that he couldn't sit still in that damn motel room a bit of a non-issue. He'd tried to backtrack their last thousand miles…and there was still no sign of his little brother. It was like the kid had just upped and disappeared…as a matter of fact it was entirely too much like it had been when he'd been searching for his father...all over again…and he hated every minute of it.

The rain dripped down his spiky blonde hair and onto his pale cheeks as the sudden ringing of his cell phone made him jump and had him scrambling for the device. _Ah-hah…signal!_

"Sam!? Where the….wait…wait slow down…where are you?" Dean stammered as his brother's panicked voice invaded his ears. "Okay…I'll be right there…just stay put."

XXXX

Dean screamed into the parking lot of the skeezy motel that Sam had directed him to…he jumped out of the car and searched frantically for the room number Sam had given him over the phone. He tried the handle once he'd found it and was surprised when it opened immediately under his fingers. He pushed open the door and then rushed inside when he saw Sam sitting dejectedly on the other bed, his worried eyes meeting Dean's frantic gaze.

"You can see…?" Sam asked quietly. He'd figured out that something must have changed the second his older brother had said he could drive and then there was the obvious look of understanding as soon as Dean entered the motel room, his not-so-blind green eyes searching for Sam.

"I can see well enough to see you have…is that blood?" Dean said and closed the distance separating them in a few quick steps. "Sam, are you hurt?"

Sam shook his head and leaned forward…his elbows coming to rest on his knees. "It's not mine, Dean."

Dean's worried eyes flickered up to meet Sam's distraught gaze. "What do you mean 'it's not yours'?" He questioned as he picked at Sam's blood stained shirt.

Sam harrumphed…before continuing. "I mean exactly what I said Dean…this isn't mine…I think I _hurt_ someone?" His voice shook as he continued… "Dean…I think I might have killed someone."

Dean's eyes widened and he shook his head in denial. There was no way that his little brother had killed anyone…at least not anyone human. Sam didn't _have that_ in him. His thoughts flickered back for a moment to the incident in the car. Sam's face contorted in rage as he'd mentally _attacked_ Dean. And suddenly he wasn't entirely sure that Sam wouldn't do that to someone else…someone that he wouldn't be able to resist killing.

_Sam felt like he was living a nightmare. He could see the damage that his words were having on his brother's generally unshakable faith in him. The demon laughed inside his head. 'Told you he would think this was all you.' It said with an overtone of laughter._

_'Why are you doing this?' Sam asked the demon. _

_'Because I can…and because I was asked to.' It answered easily… 'I get to torture you Winchesters…and that's always a good time.' Sam could feel it's hatred pour down the link between his soul and the thing that had taken over his body. He watched as Dean nodded and pushed down his rising fear of his little brother. Sam was throwing himself at the barrier between him and Dean…the barrier that marked the demon's control. He couldn't remember anything after being released by the shifter…he thought he had seen a black cloud and then nothingness had enveloped his world. _

_'I think it's time to see just how far I can push Dean…maybe I can get him to kill you? What do you think? Should we try for that?' _

_'NO! Please…just leave my brother alone…he doesn't deserve this.' Sam yelled as he felt his mind being torn apart while the demon simply taunted him further. It kept throwing up images of Dean in a wheelchair. Dean getting tossed from the chair after a couple of guys he'd hustled had come after him for the money he'd won. Apparently they didn't appreciate getting 'taken' by a cripple in a hand-me-down wheelchair. Sam could feel himself withdrawing the worse the images got. They progressed from Dean getting beaten on by strangers…to his brother as the object of their father's rage. _

_Sam watched helplessly as his brother literally begged their father to stop…he was lying bloody and beaten on the floor of some nameless motel…in another nameless town. Tears streamed down Sam's face as he watched helplessly and his guilt built exponentially over the years he'd left Dean alone. _

_'Please stop…I can't…I can't watch this…' And Sam slid into a dark corner of his own mind. How had he let himself get possessed? Who was this demon…and what did they want from him?_

_'No…he's going to suffer and you're going to be the cause of his death, Sam…or he's going to be the cause of yours. Whichever comes first.'_

_Sam watched as Dean told him that he 'couldn't' kill him…that he'd rather die himself than be left all alone. The strong emotions of the demon were spreading over Sam as he watched the thing inform Dean that 'he wasn't sorry yet…but he would be.' And then watching as it raised the gun that Dean had pressed back into his left hand…striking him over the back of the head and watching as Dean fell forward onto the dirty carpet…completely unconscious._

XXXX

"How long have you been in Sam?" Dean called loudly as he followed his possessed little brother out onto the pier. He'd gotten to the bar just in time to keep Sam from killing Jo…she was scared and pissed but she was alive. "Since he disappeared a week ago?" Dean continued, trying desperately to get the demon to keep talking so he could track where it had gone.

A deep laugh echoed through the empty pier. "Yeah…a little earlier than that." It answered, sending panic racing through Dean. Had it been in Sammy when he'd attacked Dean?

"Why? What's the game plan here?" Dean called angrily as he slipped around a dark corner and he saw a shadow move slightly faster through an opened door.

"I wanted to see how if I could push you far enough to waste Sam…should have known that you wouldn't have the sac." Sam's voice answered immediately. "I'm going to kill you and every other hunter I can find…"

"You're going to pay for that decision." Dean said through clenched teeth. He squatted down and peeked around a pillar, a shot zinged off the wood just above his head and he ducked further into the shadows.

"How? You can't hurt me…not without hurting your little brother."

Dean ground out a response as he followed the shifting of Sam's voice out onto the pier. "You're not going to be in him long enough…"

Dean was looking over the edge of the pier into the black cold water. He spun at a noise from behind him…a shocked look etched across Dean's face as Sam fired and a burning flash of pain knocked him off into the water backwards. The water closed over his head and he struggled not to immediately surface when he saw Sam's large form looming over the edge. The gun held tightly in his hands as he stared into the inky blackness of the water.

XXXX

Dean stared in shock as the demon muttered an incantation of its own…and the ceiling where the devil's trap was painted cracked, severing the sigil and releasing not-Sam. "That's better…" It said as it cracked Sam's neck and threw Bobby into a corner them thrusting Dean back into the hard edge of the doorway leading into the kitchen.

Fiery pain lanced through the bullet wound, Dean shifted and tried to pull himself up into a sitting position…when suddenly Sam's face was looming above his. Dean shrank back as far as he could…grinding his teeth together when Sam's large thumb was suddenly pressing into the still open gunshot wound. His long fingers wrapping around Dean's shoulder and leaving bruises on his upper arm as Sam created more leverage to press harder into the bleeding hole. Dean nearly bit through his lower lip to keep from screaming in agony as the barely close bullet hole was reopened.

"…I can see it your eyes Dean…you're useless…You can't save yourself…and deep down…you know you can't save your brother…you are the most broken human being I've ever come across...and that's saying something." Sam pressed further and further into the wound…opening the bloody hole in Dean's shoulder even wider. He pulled back and stared into the glaring green eyes of the older Winchester brother.

"Who are you…?" Dean said through clenched teeth as he brought his right hand up and pushed at Sam's fingers…trying to reduce the agonizing fire that was now shooting through his left shoulder.

The not-Sam tilted its head to the side and pulled back his right arm, smashing Dean in the face a moment later… "I promised myself that if I got out of hell…I was going to torture you…nice and slow…like pulling the wings off an insect." His fist recoiled and shot forward again, forcing Dean's head to the side and a bloody gash on the left side of his head to open up. "Your brother…is ours…has been since the night of the nursery fire…you know the one where mommy died...and the night in that cabin…oh…and here's a little something to remember my by…"

Suddenly Dean felt his lower half slump…no feeling below his waist…_Oh God…no…_flooded through his mind… "Don't…please…" Dean begged. Bobby grabbed Sam's right wrist before he could finish knocking out his brother…he'd seen the binding link on Sam's arm earlier…he pushed the red hot poker against the link…watching as the demon gurgled up out of Sam's throat and disappeared into the night. But he hadn't been fast enough to save Dean…the damage was already done. The demon had taken back his ability to walk…and from the broken look on the middle Winchester's face he was fully aware of it.

His glassy pain filled eyes shifted up meet Bobby's worried ones… "Bobby…" he whispered. The older man tilted his head and then glanced down toward where Sam was grabbing his right wrist as the pain from the burn caught him off guard.

"What did I miss…?" Sam mumbled when he looked over to see Dean slumped against the doorway…his legs twisted in an almost unnatural angle. His wide gaze shifted from his brother to the older hunter searching frantically for an explanation.

Dean closed his eyes and errant tear escaped from beneath his lashes as he shook his head.

"You don't remember?" Bobby asked Sam as he handed him and Dean ice packs to help control the swelling and the heat from their combined injuries.

Sam's head shook back and forth slowly. "No…did I hurt anyone?" His eyes were so full of remorse and pain that Bobby had to turn away for a moment as he collected himself.

"Bobby…do you have my old chair?" Dean said quietly. Sam's eyes snapped to his brother's crumpled form…and it suddenly took on new meaning.

"No…Dean! No…what happened?" Sam whispered as he moved to sit next to his brother. Fear clenching at his heart when Dean curled in on himself…moving slightly away from his little brother. He was racking his brain to see if he could recall exactly what had happened…the last coherent thought he had was in the motel…in east Texas…and then there were just flashes of memories. Nothing cohesive enough for him to put together…nothing that explained why his brother was suddenly asking for a wheelchair.

Bobby nodded and walked out of the room. Dean swallowed and leaned back as his disappointment and nearly palpable panic flooded his system. He couldn't believe it…but as he looked down at the legs that he knew were still there and yet knowing that he couldn't feel them, hurt. It was surreal to think that only this morning he'd been able to walk…and now…he was back where he'd been a year ago. He clenched his jaw as he looked over at the little brother that he'd sworn to protect…the pain in his left shoulder electrifying his entire body...reminding him of his failure.

Sam crawled closer to Dean. "Did I…" his eyebrows knitted together in frustration as he tried desperately to piece everything he was seeing together and come up with a reasonable solution.

"You didn't…do anything Sam…you were possessed…" Dean said quietly. His right hand was still pressed firmly against the bleeding gunshot wound and the blood that had trickled from his nose had finally stopped.

Sam's eyes widened and he gasped as he moved away from Dean. "Wh…what? I…was possessed?" His breathing increased and guilt flooded his face as he stared at his brother.

As much as Dean wanted to wallow in his own self-pity, he couldn't do that when he could clearly see the hurt echoing in his brother's eyes. Ignoring the tears that were burning behind his own tired and swollen eyes, Dean did his best to reassure Sam that this wasn't this fault. "I'll be fine Sam…" Sam interrupted with a frantic waving of his arm right in Dean's face.

"Sure you will." He said angrily.

XXXX

Bobby helped to patch up Dean's shoulder and then handed him the pain pills that Jo had given him back at the bar. And he was currently seated in the old wheelchair that his friend had had sitting in one of the spare bedrooms. Dean's shoulders were hunched and he was staring at his legs, a blank look etched firmly on his bruised face.

Sam was sitting in the chair across from him…his head in his hands and his eyes closed.

"Sam…" Dean started.

"NO Dean! I did this! I did this to you…again! How can you tell me you'll be fine?!" He cried as the tears started to flow freely and they managed to kick Dean's big brother guilt into overdrive. His eyes dipping closed as he leaned forward, the bag of ice resting against his eye and nose doing little to hide the damage Sam had inflicted.

"Hey boys…I think I got something." Bobby said as he walked into the kitchen…he was carrying a large leather book and blowing dust off the pages.

Dean and Sam looked up simultaneously. Neither brother's eyes completely dry as they stared at the older hunter. "What, Bobby?" The elder brother asked as he raised his good eye toward the door.

"That demon…the one that got to Sam…" His eyes flickered over to where Sam flinched at the statement. "Sorry son…anyways…it's in league with the yellow-eyed demon…and with that coven. Which explains why it had the power to reverse the ritual that restored your ability to walk Dean…If we track it…and we force it back to Hell…anything it did goes away…including taking your legs." Bobby watched as Dean sat up a little straighter and Sam narrowed his eyes at the news.

"So we have to kill this demon? Or the yellow-eyed demon?" Sam asked quietly.

"Both." Dean said evenly. He raised angry green eyes and looked at both men sitting across from him. "I'm done with this whole thing…we find these two ass-hats and we give them a one way ticket to Hell…" He looked into Sam's watery eyes and shook his head. "Sam…this is not your fault. This was a continuing…spell…and it just got to you and to me." He pulled in a steadying breath and looked over at Bobby. "Find it Bobby…wherever this damn thing is hiding…find it."

Sam furrowed his eyebrows and took a deep breath. "Dean…what about your legs?" He asked quietly.

"What about them?" Dean said quickly. The anger now making his voice deep and strong as he glared at the only other occupants in the room. "I've been crippled before Sam…I can deal with it. Can you?"

Sam looked like Dean had hit him as his face registered shock at the blatant question. He stuttered out an answer as he gulped back his own rising emotions. "I…uh…yeah Dean…I'm sorry…"

Dean sighed and leaned forward in his chair. "Sammy…this is not your fault. You didn't know they were gunning for me…or you. We thought we beat this…we didn't." He reached out and grasped Sam's fingers firmly in his right hand, a grimace on his face before he continued… "Sam, I've spent my life trying to protect you…but I can't do this without you…please…"

Sam looked at Dean through the fringe of his hair, his eyes reflecting the wounded puppy look that had gotten him almost everything he'd ever wanted when they were younger…only now he just wanted Dean not to be hurt…not to be stuck sitting in a _fucking wheelchair_ in Bobby's god-damned kitchen…because of something that centered around their weird ass family. He could still taste the acrid sulfur that had been expelled from his throat only hours before. But the guilt that that demon had left aching in his chest…that couldn't be expelled and yet as he looked at the determined, if beaten, face of his brother…Sam knew that he'd do anything to save Dean. If that meant that they hunted those son-of-a-bitchen-demons across the entire continental United States then he was all in…

"I can't tell you how sorry I am Dean…and I'm with you…until the end…I'm with you." Sam said in a steadier voice than he'd thought he could muster. "Are…your eyes better?" he asked.

Dean nodded. "Pretty much…with the exception of the swelling." He said pointedly as he tried to smile at his brother.

Bobby shook his head and huffed. "Okay…demon hunt it is…What?" He looked between the surprised gazes of the brothers and shrugged his shoulders. "You two yahoo's didn't think I was going let you do this alone, right?"

Dean shook his head and then his face pinched in pain as he shifted too far to the left and his shoulder pressed against the table. "Just don't touch my shoulder…or my face."

Sam managed to roll his eyes at Dean's quip. How was his brother able to do that? Just blow off what Sam had done and joke about it only hours later? As much as he'd learned from Dean growing up and over the last year that they'd been back together…it appeared that he still had a lot more to go. His older brother represented the type of man that Sam wanted to be. He caught a smirk forming on Dean's face as he grabbed at the cup of coffee that Bobby had set in front of him.

"What?" Sam asked as he tilted his head.

"You full on had a girl inside you for like a whole week." He looked over at Sam's disgusted and irritated expression and he continued anyways. "That's pretty naughty."

"Really, Dean?" Bobby said as he tried to hide his own smirk. He watched as the kid pushed his own pain and discomfort down into a deep dark 'pandora's box'…_God help the person that pops the latch on that box…_He thought silently. He loved everything about this kid…but he wished that Dean saw the same version of himself that Bobby saw. The strong man that protected his brother and had been unfailingly loyal to his father…even when he hadn't deserved it. And now…he was back in that damn chair and handling the setback with more grace than either Bobby himself was…or Sam for that matter.

"Alright…let's call Ash…put him on this." Dean said as he pushed away from the table with his right arm. "Sam…can you help me?" He asked as he eyed the inviting comfort of the couch. The pain pills were already kicking in and he just wanted to sleep…more than anything he wanted to sleep.

Sam helped to settle Dean onto the old couch, pulling the large patch-work quilt up over his brother's shoulders. Dean's breathing evened out almost immediately and his eyes drifted shut as he held his left arm close against his chest…his legs lying deathly still. Sam gulped and then turned back toward the kitchen where Bobby was watching the interaction between the brothers with interest. "Bobby…" Sam started. He was immediately cut off by the other man as he shook his head.

"Sam…he knows. Dean knows how sorry you are…hell, that boy forgave you the moment he knew you were possessed. Don't throw that away…don't beat yourself up…take all that anger and that rage and throw it into finding the bastards that did this to him." His eyes were sincere and steady as he told Sam exactly what he thought. Bobby almost never did that…at least not with Sam.

"I know Bobby…that's what scares me. He wouldn't kill me. It didn't matter what I did, he refused to take me down. It scares me." Sam said simply.

"It shouldn't Sam. That boy loves you and he will do everything possible to save you from this twin destinies thing…and by proxy, he'll save himself too." He watched as that little factoid insinuated itself into Sam's brain and he started nodding as he too realized that it was true. Dean would do anything to save him…and if they could save Sam…they could fix and save Dean too.

TBC…

**Author's Note:** _I know that this hunt shifted from canon and then backed up Dean's healing…but there is a point to this. And it has been part of the story since the beginning of this little fiction…it also means that this one is coming to a close. The witch, the demons, and the hunters…it's all coming to a head in the next two chapters. Thank you so much to everyone and anyone that took the time to review or read the last chapter. I appreciate it so so so so much._

**Please Review: I would love the continued support as this one winds down. Thank you.**


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